Sept 2012 chemo

I also meant to mention - regarding the dry eyes... my oncologist said to be sure only use artificial tears or lubricating drops - never the red-eye kind because they have medication in them.  I seem to go between having dry eyes and watery eyes.  I don't know what causes which.  Also, during the week of nadir I found if I take Advil the bloody nose is much worse because platelets are so low and it has a blood thinning effect.  Tylenol does not.  My oncologist has only approved Tylenol or even Vicodin but not Advil.  I think that is why but didn't really ask.  I just happened to take Advil one day out of desperation for a headache I couldn't get rid of.

I know I should just be glad that I have health coverage and leave it at that.  But I just can't get past the fact that I have to pay the out of pocket maximum for my plan TWICE - once for this year, and once for next year.  Simply because of the timing of my diagnosis.  So completely arbitrary.  Note to self - get cancer diagnosis in January, NOT July.  

Queen: so glad you were able to get out for a bit. Even though it is hard sometimes to push ourselves like that, I feel it makes us stronger.



Nose hair: gone right away with AC. Drip drip! First round of taxol last week, bloody nose. I also have that horrible leg pain! I tell myself, at least I don't have the nausea.

I also have weepy eyes. Some days worse than others. Been told its the chemo but I remember having them a year ago before I was dx.



Joemommy: I had a cold and the onc nurse told me to get the cough syrup Deslyn.

It really helped me! I also would wrap a scarf around my neck at night and sleep like that. Kept my throat warm.



Hope this leg pain goes away. Popped a pain pill when I got home from work so feel

better now. Hope to maybe sleep too!



Hugs to you all!



Erin

Hi Ladies,

  I went to see my MO today- and although I am anemic, I got the okay for chemo tomorrow!  I am still feeling kind of crappy, but they didn't feel my levels were that bad.  (I was suprised)  Good news is that my MO said my cancer tumor has shrunk to next to nothing:-)  I still have to do my last three TCH, and my surgery, and radiation - but I am still super happy.  I cried, he gave me a hug:-) 

cgesq,terri, and cocobean:  I asked my MO about the order of TCH and what cocobean heard from Dr Pegram.  My MO is the medical director at Stanford - and so far, every medical study that I put in front of him, he knows about - so I trust him.  He said that he hadn't heard that from Dr. Pegram, but also said that even if that was the case- it wouldn't matter very much because Herceptin is different than the other chemotherapy drugs because it remains in our system for a much prolonged period of time (I looked online and it said that it lasts about three months)- so if there is a synergistic thing that happens with the TC, it would still be happening.  (I guess it wouldn't have happened for the first one, but all subsequent ones it would)   I also wonder about what Dr Pegram meant because I use the same infusion center and nurses as all of his clients, and we all get it the same way, I think... but I will check in with the nurses tomorrow when I get my infusion:-)  Hope this hasn't made things more confusing.

Joemommy:  I would love to hear about what your nurse says about the TCH order too!

Nosehair:  I have no nose hair... but I have no idea when that happened!  I looked this morning after reading all of your posts- and lo and behold, all of my nose hair has left town. 

allurbad: I can imagine that having celiacs when you don't have cancer is extremely difficult- It must be so hard to struggle with celiacs and have cancer!  I have tried many times to go gluten free.  It does feel so much better in my body when I am successful, but it is so hard.  I do think a gluten free diet is supposed to be excellent to stay cancer free!  so you are ahead of the game!  Something I may have to try again.

Toastiecat: Hope you win powerball!   I loved your blog post today.  It is so amazing the things the universe will leave for us.  I think these kinds of things happen all of the time, we just aren't tuned in enough to discover them:-)   I also love the Velveteen rabbit.

Whenlife & Butterfly:  I am in the same boat as you both with paying double the insurance premiums.  What bad timing.

And to all of us getting Chemo this week - I hope we have an easy go of it, feel great for Thanksgiving, and have no SE for the rest of the weekend!!!

Happy Thanksgiving for those who celebrate!

And thanks everyone for letting me vent.  As a therapist, it is hard sometimes to ask for support from others.  I am used to being the one that supports... which is something that I love to do...  but I love getting all of the support from each of you!  Your support for some reason means so much more to me than the support I get from others - because you know more than anyone else what I am dealing with.  I don't have to put on a brave face.  I can say I am hurting, feel sick, or scared, talk about nose hairs- and I feel like I am part of something greater than me- and I can tap into all of our strength to get through it.  I feel normal in what feels like a completely crazy-making time in my life.  So thank you.  This thanksgiving I can definitely say I am super thankful for this group of amazing women!

Okay.... I wrote a book again.

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Good morning my sisters!!!! I hope everyone is doing great and also getting those turkeys ready.... I just Have a quick question I get herceptin every week ... On friday when I got my doze had a headache all day and my chest was hurting ..., this morning I woke up with some chest pain an a headache... I have an appt today ... So I'll ask my onco but just wanting to know if anyone else had this experience..., tomorrow is my last FEC then taxol after that

Cheerio - I had a virus for almost three weeks.  Cough, lot of congestion, low grade temp, dragging.  Docs told me to call if temp got to 100.4 - and it never did.  My cough did result in a chest xray to be sure no pneumonia was in the works before they would proceed with chemo.

Wow- for some reason I am not getting emails for this thread anymore.  My subscription says I do, but I am not getting them.  So much has happened in the last week so I need to go catch up.

Here is my update- A week ago I had some chest pain overnight AND in my left arm.  It woke me up a few times, but I kept going back to sleep.  It was still continuing the next morning so I went ahead and went to the ER.  Wow- if you go to the ER with chest pain, they don't make you sit in the waiting room or even go to triage to answer questions for the nurse! LOL!  They move QUICK!  Long story short- it was NOT a heart attack- I continuned having the chest pain across my left side while I was there in the ER, but it was nothing to do with my heart.  Just a weird chemo thing or something!  Looking back, I would still go in because it really was something alarming!    The really sucky thing is that they were out of needles that they need to access my port so they had to stick my arm.  They couldn't find it and had to use an ultrasound machine just to find a vein!  They poked me quite a few times and I got really, really bruised.

Other than that, I still have extreme muscle pain/fatigue that nobody can explain.  It is starting to happen in my arms as well as my legs.  I can still function normally so I guess it is just something I have to deal with until I am done with chemo.  I am also very VERY twitchy!  After my last chemo so many muscles were twitching I almost felt like my whole body was vibrating! LOL!    This next week is my good week, so I think we are going to go out of town for thanksgiving and enjoy some food!

QueenKong

                  I had my surgery done at Sloan by Dr. Cody.  There were no problems at all!  MSK is like a well oiled machine, (once you get let in, no easy task). They will tell you where to go and what to do. I had a lumpectomy done, this was the Dr's. recommendation.  The surgery was like one hour, the recovery very quick ( I had no drains), and the outcome very good. My breast (they went in through the nipple), so there was no scars, the breast actually looks better than it did before. The Dr. is nice, knowledgable, and listens to what you say.  Wish I could say the same about chemo, day 5 after my treatment, still nauseous, cant eat a thing. I bought some low fat chocolate milk in the supermarket, I will let everyone know if it works when you cant keep food down.  Good luck all, no SE's, hope it ends soon.

Wow! Miss a day and so much to catch up on. Someone mentioned getting bloody noses with Taxol - that has definitely been the case for me. Next week will be my last Taxol. Then I start my FEC and Herceptin schedule. I am so scared about that. My oncologist is giving me a prescription for some pretty hefty antinausea pills. But at least I'll be off the steroids!! I had a cold last week that (thankfully!) did not progress into anything more serious than that. I was still able to have my treatment yesterday. So last night I was super tired from the cold plus the treatment and I thought to myself, nope. Nuh uh, not going to fall for that! These steroids are sneaky - you THINK you're tired but they still take over so I took a sleeping pill, Zopiclone, before bed. Went to bed at around 8pm and then...zing! Up at 1am. Does anyone recommend Ativan over Zopiclone? Because I have both but I thought Zopilcone was the super sleeper. Guess not.

I'm calling this year the "unyear".  This is the year that doesn't exist.  It will not be documented, it will not be looked back on with fondness, and it most certainly will not be celebrated.  It's the year that my DH didn't turn 50 when my port was put in, it's the year we didn't celebrate our 21st anniversary in the chemo lounge, and it's the year that I won't be turning 47 the day after my last chemo.  It's also the year that Thanksgiving became just another meal.  I'm even thinking that in keeping with the spirit of the unyear there will be no Christmas (if I have my way).  I just don't care.  I want all this to be done and over with.  And when that happens THAT will be the moment to document and remember, but everything that leads up to it feels like me in a torture chamber forcing a smile to make everyone else feel better about this.  

Can anyone relate?

Allurbad - CONGRATS!   Will definitely toast to you.

Whenlife - I feel we can all relate.  2012 is definitely a year that is not full of fond memories.

I can so relate to the "unyear".  For me, the only good thing is that here in NY, fall and winter we kind of hunker down anyway.  Stay home more, watch tv, etc.  I'm just trying to make it through.  I cant wait for the day I can post that its over now, no more treatments.  I guess we just have to hang in and hope, I don't feel like hanging in either.  When all else fails, I just count, count the AC treatments off, start counting off the taxol soon.

Hi everyone,

Wow, it seems like many of you have been dealing with some major hassles this week.  I hope that your doctors and husbands get a grip and start behaving soon, and that everyones' illnesses and side effects pass quickly.  I also have some comments on nose hair and dry eyes, but I've just taken a steriod defying heavy duty sleeping pill so I'm on limited time.

My husband has also started to exhibit some curious behaviour recently.  We had a bit of a blowout half way through my FEC and I told him I needed a bit more help and a bit more compassion, which he seemed to take on board.  A few vastly extravagant crock pot meals ensued (using really complicated ingredients that even I'd steer clear of and he can't even fry an egg properly.)  I fell over myself with appreciation at every effort (meals were actually pretty good) but he's seemed to have lost interest in becoming an amateur chef now, so we're back to me doing it all or him ordering takeaway.  So, with the Taxotere, I've found them to be pretty rough.  First one was unpleasant, second was positively horrible, and if the trend continues, I imagine that tomorrow's will be ghastly.  He has now started to have mysterious illnesses around the times of my treatments.  It's almost like he's competing for attention or something.  Last time he had a phantom cold and there was lots of huffing and sighing around the kitchen while I was actually struggling to move from the bed to the bathroom.  Now today, he's apparently so exhausted (why, I ask myself) and has been taking sporadic naps all over the place while I have done a full day's work, followed by a mother and daughter bonding evening which I could have done without quite frankly.  Men.  What complete babies!  I've refrained from addressing this with him today since my capacity for diplomacy while on steroids is pretty limited. 

Right, hoping this pill knocks those steroids in to submission so I can get some sleep.  Got to get in fierce mode for that chemo tomorrow.  It is, however, the LAST one.  Hang in there nails--we're nearly done!

Singing the steroid song, too, Mariposa!

LAST CHEMO TOMORROW AT 9:00AM!

Because my WBC have been good throughout treatment, I get to skip the Neulasta shot on Thursday! I'm so excited... my sister and her family are driving here from MO to be with us for Thanksgiving. My parents can't make it because dad is having surgery next week for arterial blockage in his right leg and the doc doesn't want him in a car for that long (6 hours - one way).  My sister was worried about coming on the day of my last chemo but I told her I can feel crappy with or without her here and I choose WITH!

Now, if I could just get these freaking hot flashes & night sweats under control! I can deal with the daytime flashes fairly well but the night ones are AWFUL! I thought if I took Lunesta, maybe I'd sleep through them...WRONG... just made me groggy and sweaty. Having my ooph sometime in late December/early January...Hoping the sweats don't get worse - dare I say, I hope they stay the same. I am (literally) so tired of sleeping in 1.5 hour intervals!

Hugs and prayers to all!

I haven't updated the list in a while.  I think that we have  picked up a few more members.  How is everyone doing?

These are the Members of the Exclusive September Club No One Wants to JOIN.
If I've left you off, please let me know.

7312012------- M 47
301724------- Vermont
Aic------- 1 C. 35
Aliasismo------- radiologist 56
Allurbaddayswillend------- M, 1 C. 48
Amy4978------- Howard City, MI 34
AmylovesBubby
Bearcub------- Prince George, British Columbia M., 3 C. 8 G radiologist 55
Butterfly14------- Self Clearwater, FL 3 C. 44
Cgesq------- New Jersey radiologist 2 C, 50
Cherioo------- Florida 4 C. 46
Cindi74------- Apopka, Florida radiologist 3 C 6 SC. 21GC M 75
Damiana9------- Burleson, Texas
DonnaDo8------- Self 2 C. 42
Englishrose75------- Self Diagnosed Milton Keynes United Kingdom 2 C. 37
Ergirl
EvaNJ
Firestorm531------- 1 C. Texas 41
florbo------- Dallas, Texas
Foreverchanged------- 72612 Self Chelsea, Quebec 3 C. 38
Frannygirl------- Louisiana
Internutz1------- Van Alstyne, TX USA
JodiRocksthePink------- M, 2 C. 39
Joemommy------- Portland, Oregon 1 C. 46
Jojo2373------- Maryland Self.....5C. 50
Justegan------- Wolcott/Kingston Dr. Diagnose, 23
Kathec----------Los Angeles, CA

KelleyB

Kidsandlabs
Kstillie
Laura_g

Linn65 Indiana
Lokimax2------- Siler City, NC

Marianelizabeth
Mariposa123------- Bay Area, Californiz 2 C. 44
Melrosemelrose------- (visitor from April) Houston, Texas
Mindy703------- M, 3 C 41
Momto5children
Movinonmom
Mycancerjourney------- Illinois
Neta69
Nickythebean
PatriciaHurtado------- Miami, FL

QueenKong
RSDavid------- 3 C. 4G. 58
Runnergirl71------- Fort Collins, Colorado
SandeeAR------- Conway, ARm, M, 2DD, 53
Sheerbab Dallas------- , Texas Self Diagnosed M, NO C, 43

Shock2bhere--------------RI--M. radiologist 48
Sjayne2u Ohio
Sparkysbrat------- East Tennessee Mountains
SugarlandlDC------- Houston 3 C. 43
Tara88
Terri07-11
Timbek2-------Peoria, IL., radiologist, 3 C. 40
Toastiecat
Twinsplus1 3 C. 44
Usmcblondie 25
Waitingforthenextstep
Whenlifegivesyou lemons------- Minneapolis M radiologist 46
Wendy49------- Michigan 2C M self 49

That's 60. So many enduring together.

Appointment now for reunion on this website in five years!
Code: M=Married, C=children, GC= grandchildren, SC= Step Children "self" =self-diagnosed, radiologist=how diagnosed