January 2012 chemo

Peggy - My thoughts are with you during these strange times!  I've been watching the news and can't imagine what you must be dealing with.  Hope your DH is well and you are strong.  You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.

How's it going Kithchenella?



Hey everyone, today is 1 year to the date since I got my diagnosis after a day at the breast care centre filled with mammogram, ultrasound, fine needle biopsy and core biopsy. Yes, all in one day!



The clinic, where I had never been before, works on a "last man standing" system. Everyone is given morning appointments for mammos and then those that are clear get to leave and the others stay through each of the next steps. I was there at 9.30am for my mammo and was the LAST ONE TO LEAVE at nearly 5pm :-/.



Looking back now, I can remember starting that day thinking it would be a quick appointment to confirm what my doctor had said was probably a cyst. I thought it was going to be interesting to see if mammos are as uncomfortable as everyone always said they were (which I didn't that it was). Little did I know how much more pain was to come that day and through this entire past year, and that one mammogram was the only one I will ever have in my life.



It was close to Christmas and a new fancy mall had opened recently in the heart of Sydney. My hubby works in the city so I was supposed to meet him after he finished work and we were going to go Christmas shopping and for a nice dinner (date night!!!). Instead, he got a call from me at 3.30pm to leave work and come to the centre. He arrived to be whisked with me into the doctor's office - and the words BREAST CANCER.



It wasn't the date night we planned... After we paid over the first of what would be, over this past year, many thousands of dollars in medical expenses, we walked over to the shiny new mall. First thing we did was find a shiny new trendy bar and order a drink each. Then we just sat in shock for a while before wandering aimlessly through the multiple levels of shops. We didn't buy anything at all for Christmas - we had no heart for it.



We had dinner at a shiny new burger place. I remember the burger tasting good. Have suggested to hubby a few times over the past year that we go back there, but he hasn't been keen. Maybe it's psychological?



So much has happened since that day, I could fill a book. Oh, hang on, maybe you could just read back over the past 82 pages of our conversations in here!



There is only one thing I have loved that has been new this year - the meeting of all of you. Thanks for being here - and sorry that you had to be here...



Love ya, Jenn

We are hanging in here Jenn.  Hubby is doing better.  CT scan was clear.  He had a follow up MRI a week ago but the Professor who is supposed to read it was out of the country.  We still are hoping the doc's will let hubby travel so we can go to grandson's Bar Mitzvah the end of Dec. in LA. I am skipping one week of Herceptin so even if he can't go I should be able to make a quick trip and get back in time to not miss my next Herceptin.  I'm a nervous wreck because I usually have these trips planned months in advance and am packed 2 weeks before.

Best Wishes to all for the best and brightest of holidays

and a healthy Happy New Year!

Peggy - Two Bar Mitzvahs continents apart!  I'm sure it was a busy, but wonderful time! I'm so glad to hear that your husband's diagnosis wasn't as bad as you thought it might be.  In the beginning of December I thought of you and wondered if you would be able to make the trip. 

Isn't it amazing that a year has passed since our adventures began?  This time last year I couldn't imagine what 2013 would bring.  We were all dealing, day to day, with side effects and just surviving.  I think I was still on 'automatic' at this point last year - just getting through treatment. I still have a few small things to do to finish up the reconstruction.  Stage 2 (nipples) is planned for next Friday.  I had to postpone this surgery in December.  My 97 yr old father passed away two days before my surgery date. A few months down the road I'll do the tattoos.  Hopefully, that will be the end of reconstruction.

Glad to hear the Herceptin tx is almost done for you.  I didn't need that, so chemo ended in April for me.  I did start arimidex in July, so I'm officially still in treatment and will be for 5 years.  The SEs aren't so bad.  I had a skin reaction related to the meds and I feel much older with aches and pains, but nothing I can't manage. 

Let's hope that 2013 brings healing and hope for all of us!  I can't wait to feel sort of 'normal' again!

Jenn - So glad to hear from you!  Congratulations on your completion of Herceptin! I can't believe a year has gone by.  I'm not much of a facebook person so I haven't kept up.  Doesn't it feel great when your MO suggests removing the port?  It really made me feel that I was ready to move on.  And by the way, I too, had some lumps and bumps show up eventhough I had a BMX. Mammo and US showed fat necrosis.  Of course it means more followup in 6 months, but I'm not worried.  Hopefully you will hear the same thing!

Enjoy your daughter's birthday and hers's to moving past C!

I've never posted a whole lot, but have been at the forums throughout this whole experience. 

It's harder than I thought - this "moving past cancer" thing and finding the balance between being vigilant and being paranoid.  I don't live in fear, but there aren't many quiet moments when I don't think "I just wish I knew if it was coming back or not."  I really expected to leave all of my worries behind me at the end of 2012, but they seem to have decided to stick around.

My hair is still super short - I've gotten the back trimmed and the top texturized a couple times, but haven't ever cut my bangs at all, and they're just now getting to my eyebrows.  But at least it looks look like a style now and not like I had a run-in with a lawnmower.  

I only have 1 more CT scan before I'm "written off" and dropped down to checkups every 6 months.  Like you, Brooke, I struggle with fatigue; my youngest is 18, though, so it's nothing compared to you with your little ones! 

I think of all of you often and hope everyone is doing well. 

Hugs & sunshine,

Rachel

Seagrover. Barbara was Seagrover here in our group...

If you search her messages you will see that she was just diagnosed with mets in December. The cancer seemed to take over very quickly and it's hard to tell from her facebook page exactly what hapoened, but as far as I can tell the cancer had somehow affected her kidneys as she was getting dialysis for a very short period before she chose to discontinue treatments and went home to her daughter with palliative care.

I have asked the mods to add her to the list of those lost to this stupid disease.

Jenn

Thanks Jenn for letting us know.  We were diagnoses within days of each other. 

Another Angel.  May she rest in peace.

My thoughts and prayers go out to the family and friends of Barbara  ( seagrover )

Thank you Jenn for letting us know.

As another January 2012 chemo thread member I'm so sorry to hear about Barbara.  Sending thoughts of comfort & strength to her family and friends.

I found this article written just a couple months ago.  Hard to believe how fast everything changed.  One Woman's Reality

My last post on this thread was back on 6/14/12.    Since I ended up actually starting chemo in Feb of 2012, I was trying to keep up with both groups.   Reading both threads, dealing with the health and work issues (and family crap) became too much and I dropped out of your group.   I just happened to be reading lately to see how everyone is doing.   So very sorry to hear of Barbara (Seagrover)  having died.   

Is your FB group still active.  Can I be part of it still?   When I was more active, I felt connected to all of you and have often wondered how you are doing.    My situation is that I am still working (I was 71 just this past Dec.)  I will retire at the end of June.   Money is a major continuing worry for me but I will manage somehow.   And my two 40'ish daughters with various health issues have been a continued source of anxiety and concern.  At least, they are both now on Soc Sec Disab which helps.  

I find the emotional strains of everything are the worse for me.  And most of that is based on fear.   In the past few days, I've quickly speed-read the past 40 pages and it brought back to me just how bad it was and how far we've come.  I feel a renewed spirit of hope and fight.   And I am thankful for each day that is good.   Hugs and warm thoughts to all of you!