Breast cancer and a major comorbidity

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1Athena1
1Athena1 Member Posts: 6,696

Mods,

I realized I have a long record of railing against the growing number of forums, many of which I consider repetitive, but if yu can't beat 'em, join 'em....SO I would like to suggest a new forum for people with BC and a major comorbidity.

Many of us have breast cancer experiences that are deeply colored by additional medical disorders. We oftten have to make gut-wrenching life and death decisions to accept or reject treatment. I cannot overstate how difficult those decisions are. There are no guidelines for us and we are in scientifically unchartered territory. Our oncologist and other physicians have a hard time advising us and sometimes it feels extremely lonely.

Comorbidities that can really change the equation are many. I am talking about serious ones - major, life threatening ones that are separate from the BC but that can also kill or seriously main - such as diabetis, MS, serious cardiac problems, bipolar disorder, schizophrenia, a history of a different cancer, Parkinson's etc... It would be cool to have a forum that would enable people to start illness-specific threads. The ones that exist now tend to get lost because they are all over the place, and hence they don't get the attention that is deserved.

Thank you for your attention!

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Comments

  • pupmom
    pupmom Member Posts: 5,068
    edited November 2012

    I think it is an excellent idea! I do not have a comorbidity (that I know of), but I see many posts and threads that relate to them. For instance, there is one on the Active list right now discussing BC and HIV/Aids. Having a Forum for comorbidity would help people in need find information and support for their various conditions.

  • Moderators
    Moderators Member Posts: 25,912
    edited November 2012

    There is an existing forum, Mixed Type Breast Cancer or Breast Cancer with Another Diagnosis that includes, for example, threads about breast cancer patients also dealing with HIV, Sjogrens syndrome, MS, Lupus, Rheumatoid Arthritis and Addison's disease.

    • The Mods

  • 1Athena1
    1Athena1 Member Posts: 6,696
    edited November 2012

    That's pairing apples with oranges. Mixed type bc and a completely different comorbidity cannot be compared AT ALL. In one case, you have the cancer and one treatment. In another, it is a totally different kettle of fish. I strongly believe it disrespects the realities of both sets of people to have them together.

    ETA: Mods, please reconsider. These are two different situations. You could fairly easily separate threads and forums. I hope I get some agreement on this (thanks Yorkie).

  • bluedahlia
    bluedahlia Member Posts: 6,944
    edited November 2012
  • kayfh
    kayfh Member Posts: 790
    edited November 2012

    I do not have a life threatening co- morbidity, but I do know that breast cancer seems to ignore the fact that people might have other major health concerns going on. Is there anything in the literature that indicates any kind of disorder, disease... Is PROTECTIVE against breast cancer? This forum could develop many, many threads. The people who are dealing with specific co-morbidities could benefit from the other people's experiences of dealing with breast cancer and x.

    It is possible that this forum would have diverse threads, but we are a diverse community.

  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited November 2012

    Seems time, having gone to the link Moderators gave above, to separate that Forum.  Creating a Forum for the cormobidity Athena is describing.  Just as the Complementary and Alternative Forums are now separate.

    If I was looking for bc and ------- ( fill in the blank, I'd probably put in depression) I wouldn't have the patience to scroll down that long list in the existing forum.  When a newbie signs on, and is told she can no longer continue to use the antidepressant which saved her life for years because she has to now take Tamoxifen, she would be directed to a Forum that would address issues just like that.

    Or further on in treatment, there are so, so many situation where taking, or not taking, hormonals, can really mess with exisiting diseases.

    Good luck Athena, I support your request.

  • Stormynyte
    Stormynyte Member Posts: 650
    edited November 2012

    You have my vote.

  • 1Athena1
    1Athena1 Member Posts: 6,696
    edited November 2012

    Here are some examples of threads regarding breast cancer and comorbidities that are laying around BCO because there isn't a clear place to put them:

    Multiple Sclerosis and Breast cancer - in the DCIS forum:

    http://community.breastcancer.org/forum/68/topic/727917?page=14#post_3236246

    Breast Cancer and Prediabetes - in the Canadian Breast Cancer Survivors forum:

    http://community.breastcancer.org/forum/55/topic/792647?page=1#post_3180585

    Weight loss surgery after breast cancer - in the Moving Beyond Cancer forum:

    http://community.breastcancer.org/forum/7/topic/788586?page=1#post_3050301

    Anyone out there on psych meds - in the Stage IV forum:

    http://community.breastcancer.org/forum/8/topic/788934?page=1#post_3061944

    These are just a few examples of threads that are spread out and that could have gotten more attention in a comorbidities only forum. Many people come to BC with "pre-existing" conditions. I am not talking about secondary ailments that come up as a result of treatment.

  • YramAL
    YramAL Member Posts: 1,651
    edited November 2012

    I think it's an excellent idea, Athena. 

    I myself just responded on a thread about Graves' Disease and BC.

    Mary

  • marywh
    marywh Member Posts: 2,280
    edited November 2012

    Think its a great idea!

  • River_Rat
    River_Rat Member Posts: 1,724
    edited November 2012

    I have several comorbidities and it might be interesting to see if there are others similar.  I looked at the forum the Mods referenced and it does seems that it would be useful to have that forum for those that are dealing with mixed dx's of BC and a separate forum for those dealing with BC and an entirely different comorbidity.

    Edited to correct differently to different.  My train of thought derailed.

  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited November 2012

    I don't know that another forum is needed, maybe just re-labeling the current one to make it clear that it is the place to put threads for those coping with multiple diagnoses.  The current title is a bit confusing.

    Many of us cope with a variety of comorbidities that significantly impact treatment decisions, and would never think to look under "mixed type breast cancer" to get information about the interactions. 

    Think how much a comorbidity such as impaired cardiac function, or conditions that can cause cardiac damage over time could impact the decisions surrounding chemo and herceptin that are being made at a point when people are still learning how to navigate this site.

  • hrf
    hrf Member Posts: 3,225
    edited November 2012

    Makes sense to me to add what is being requested. 

  • etherize
    etherize Member Posts: 423
    edited November 2012

    Athena, thanks so much for suggesting this.

    I do hope we can get a separate forum for Breast Cancer Plus Co-morbidities (or "Breast Cancer with Another Diagnosis").  To be honest, I was quite disappointed last year, when as a new member and the only one here who had HIV, I asked to start a forum on HIV and breast cancer and the mods told me to post in the "Mixed Type Breast Cancer or Breast Cancer with Another Diagnosis" forum.  Consequently, my thread basically got lost in the "mix." 

    "Mixed Type Breast Cancer" is one thing.  "Breast Cancer with Another Diagnosis" is entirely different.  As the site grows, I think we really need to separate the two, because there will undoubtedly be more and more people with breast cancer AND a co-morbidity or other diagnosis that affects their treatment.  It would be nice to make it easy for them to find information that relates to their unique situation.

  • 1Athena1
    1Athena1 Member Posts: 6,696
    edited November 2012

    I agree, etherize. I am disappointed by the mods' response - and they are usually fairly acommodating in this.

    Mixed type cancer is all treated in one way and it is one medical event or story. When you have a different illness, THEN get cancer, treatment decisions are affected by your body's response to that other illness, by the drugs you are taking to treat that other illness and by certain do-not-dos that frequently make you a bad candidate for so-called life-saving cancer treatment.

    We don't have the "luxury" of throwing the kitchen sink at our cancer.  

    Many of us with comorbidities frequently find ourselves in a no man's land because we have to see various specialists, and they each know little about the other illness and so have little insight they can offer. We are often left alone to make life and death decisions while our doctors stand by with arms crossed. We have to improvise with no mdical evidence to back us.

    In contrast, mixed type BC still gets packaged and treated as one illness, and it gets presumably dignosed at treated at the same time. Having DCIS plus LCIS plus IDC is NOT the same as having, say, IDC plus HIV. How the mods don't recognize the difference is beyond me. All you have to do is separate the two topics into two forums. IMO, Cancer plus another serious illness/major comorbidity should go in the same part of the site as "help me get through treatment."

    The effects for those of us with bc and a comorbidity last a long, long time - even for us early stagers who are fortunate enough to not have a terminal cancer dx.

    ETA: If BCO is worried that talk of other illnesses will go beyond the scope of a BC forum, with due respect, I have news for you: CANCER ALWAYS goes beyond the scope of cancer. It touches every aspect of life. We need to discuss bc from our perspective, just as people do who are preoccupied with religion, who have relationship problems, who are caregivers, etc....

  • Lee7
    Lee7 Member Posts: 657
    edited November 2012

    Think about it. We all benefit from reading the posts from those who have already gone through bc treatments. Look at the Prepare for chemo tip list, or Lymphedema precaution info.  This is compiled from past experiences and it has helped many.

    Information from others about how their co-mobidity affected/interacted with their bc treatments, in a place easy to find, could be equally lifesaving for many individuals. 

    At the very least, it would give members a place to talk to others who are dealing with similar issues. Maybe without having to explain over and over why they are not doing the 'gold standard' treatments and are looking for other answers as to what can best help them.

  • 1Athena1
    1Athena1 Member Posts: 6,696
    edited November 2012
  • etherize
    etherize Member Posts: 423
    edited November 2012

    I'm heartened by all the people who want to see this as a separate forum (including those who don't even have a co-morbidity).  It just seems logical to separate it out, and how hard can it be to do that?

    I don't understand why the mods don't want to do that.

  • 1Athena1
    1Athena1 Member Posts: 6,696
    edited November 2012

    Bump!

    Yes, we do have too many forums - for example, there should be only one "Moving Beyond" forum" and there shouldn't be TWO for people with various types of cancer. The micro-invasive DCS that is her2 -neg does not rise to the need of a while forum either.

    Also, there should NOT be a separate pain forum - pain is endemic to cancer.

    Bone loss is often a comorbidity - why does it have it own forum, and yet we can't have one for ALL comorbidities?

    Makes no sense to me.

    Athena, still pawing away at this as long as it remains under consideration. :)

  • pallir
    pallir Member Posts: 290
    edited November 2012

    Hello all,

    I have been a member since 9/23/12. In desperation I had been searching the internet to find someone, ANYONE, like me. A person with cancer and a Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID), sometimes called Multiple Personality Disorder (MPD). What I DID find through searching, was humorous references to having a split personality, etc. Don't get me wrong, my loved ones and I laugh about it, too - how else does one cope? Before I was diagnosed in 1996, my three children loved it when their dad went out of town because "Kentucky Fired Chicken Mom" would show up: she was the one that was younger than my kids and was always willing to let my 16 yr. old buy fast food for us (KFC Mom didn't cook!).

    Having a forum such as Athena mentions would have helped me so much; if only to get my thoughts out.  If there had been a forum that was more easily accessible, perhaps others with cancer and MPD would have posted and given me hope.

    The AMA states that our physician must fully dislose all of the options available to us regarding our treatment, regardless of whether they perform the option or not.  Seven out of ten women are NOT being given this info about their breast reconstruction. Physicians are further required to help the patient locate and establish with whatever physician they want, even if it is at a different facility. To do otherwise, constitutes abuse of power and trust.

    My PS did NOT fuly disclose or fully inform the pros and cons of the options he DID present. In addition, I was lied to about who would do my surgery, about the option for skin/nipple sparing, and then about what was happening to me physically being "normal" for this type of procedure.

    I only mention this to explain that this abuse triggered my MPD, REALLY bad.  I trusted my PS to help me; instead, for reasons of his own, he did what, in his mind, was best for him with, what would seem, no considerataion for pre-existing physical conditions that would indicate I was not a candidate for his procedure.  I didn't expect anyone to factor in MPD.  It had been manageable for many years and was not a problem for me.

    However, my MPD originated from childhood abuse - emotional, physical and sexual. Children are supposed to be able to trust those placed in a position to provide care and protection from harm.  If those very people don't provide that care and protection but instead put their own wants before that of the child, regardless of the immediate and long term damage to the child, THAT is abuse. The child's life, to some degree, is sacrificed to the abuser's wants.  The message: "You don't matter - I matter.  Your hopes and dreams, your life - they don't count. No one is stopping me, because no one cares about you and you have no value.  And if you say anything, no one will believe you because I am an adult and respected and I will call you a liar. And they will believe ME."

    What Dr. S did to me felt like the abuse I had received in the past; the same message, the same betrayal of trust and the same sense of powerlessness.  This along with the constant pain the expanders were causing due to my fibromyalgia, triggered my MPD and out came the little one who carries all of the abuse of my life. She is very little, five or six - maybe younger.  She is shame based; afraid and mistrustful of everyone.  Her whole existence is fear and pain. She thinks if we can gather enough information we can somehow protect ourselves from abuse - if we can see it coming, then we should be able to protect ourselves . . . can't we? But we couldn't when we were little . . .  She can't imagine what we did so wrong that would make Dr. S do this to us. It hurts to breathe.  He put the ports right on our chest bone and we can't even get a hug because it hurts.  He is not nice and he lies and we don't like him. there.

    Sorry, now I am little.  But we are working togethr better now.  Everyone was in a safe place with Jesus but then that doctor made us afraid again and we can't sleep with Pete because we can't lay down in the bed because it hurts and we really really miss sleeping next to Pete. I want to make sure that doctor can't hurt other women and I want to tell other women who have many parts like me that it is ok and that it is not their fault and that they are precious and that god loves them like he loves me. I am sad that Dr. S didn't tell us the truth.  We could have been ok by now but we have found a good dr. in miami to start fixing the side that hurts the most on this saturday. he is nice and went to a place in the jungle and operated on many children who had hurt mouths and things. i am sorry about so many people hurting and that some doctors are not nice and doing the right thing. it makes me sad. but i do know that god loves me even though some parts are scared of him because he let his son be killed but we know that big angie isn't scared but she isn't out all the time. scared angie isn't out and that is good. it is awful hard to keep up with things. i like y'all. yu are all very nice to each other and that makes me happy.

    i am glad to get to write to y'all but i am afarid to read what someone might say. i'll let pete read it first cause big angie isnt here right now

    your friend angie 

  • Moderators
    Moderators Member Posts: 25,912
    edited November 2012

    Hello All, We have separated out the two forums, and moved a number of threads over as well. Please take a look and provide any feedback. Thanks, Your Mods

  • 1Athena1
    1Athena1 Member Posts: 6,696
    edited November 2012

    Mods - thank you very much! I really appreciate that you listened to our concerns.

  • Moderators
    Moderators Member Posts: 25,912
    edited November 2012

    Sure thing, we just needed to discuss. Let's see how it evolves Wink

  • etherize
    etherize Member Posts: 423
    edited November 2012

    Thanks so much, mods!  Kiss

  • Jomama2
    Jomama2 Member Posts: 96
    edited November 2012

    Angie -- I am so sorry for your pain, both physical and emotional.  I am glad Pete is with you, understanding and taking care of you and the others.  I do not have MPD, so I can only imagine what it's been like to go through treatment. I did suffer physical abuse as a child and what I'll call "inappropriate" behavior by my father when I was 21.  It changes who you are -- not easy to "get over".  This forum is a "soft place to fall", so feel free to post whatever you need to say.  We are here to listen, not to judge.  I wish only the best for all of you.  Take good care...Joan

  • Traci-----TripNeg
    Traci-----TripNeg Member Posts: 2,298
    edited November 2012

    (((((angie))))) Thank you for sharing. Wow....I'm just shaking my head in awe of you. I too wish only the best for all of you.

    Traci

  • pallir
    pallir Member Posts: 290
    edited November 2012

    Thank you, Traci and Joan.  Since the mods separated the forums, I've been posting over there. If you want, you can see how things are doing by going to the topic: BC with Pre-existing Major Mental Illness - How Many? .

    This Sat. I am having 1 of 2 breast reconstruction surgeries in Miami.  Am so glad! He'll remove the expanders and I'll be able to take a deep breathSmile DH is with me- not the 30th anniversary we'd planned, but grateful for God's goodness in giving us to one another.

    God bless y'all,

    Angie

  • cookiegal
    cookiegal Member Posts: 3,296
    edited November 2012

    oh Athena.... you still hate my little pain forum :(

    Good idea though, glad to see it happened!

  • 1Athena1
    1Athena1 Member Posts: 6,696
    edited November 2012

    (((cookiegal))) I didn't mean it that way at all - it's just that pain is so endemic to bc and its treatment that it is hard to separate one from t'other - most especially for stage IV. Glad we were both given what we requested, though.:)

  • Spica16
    Spica16 Member Posts: 130
    edited March 2013

    Hello Athena,

    Thank you for your persistence in getting this done! I had mentioned it to the moderators, also, but didn't follow through, like you did. Kudos, to you!

    I will try to get the gals over in the "Breast Cancer and Multiple Sclerosis" topic, in the "DCIS" forum, to head over here, instead. That topic is mostly dormant, now. I am sure it is because it is hard to find...and confusing. I only found that topic through a search for "BC & MS", myself.  

    Many thanks ~ Shar 

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