i guess i am depressed

fredntan · November 2012

Here i go again. Almost 4 weeks out from diep. Everyone out of house today. I cant stop crying. Wtf. I hate doing this. BC has consumed my life. I fing hate it. I am dressed. Appetite going down again. Part of me is just consummed with fear. Sometimes I dont know what to cook. Is it going to kill me. I have that anticancer book by my bed. Havnt read it

I have to pull myself together again.

My 20 yr old was a inch away from killing herself in car accident few months ago. She was speeding. Stupid, walked away from it. My 16 yr old still has type 1 diabetes. She has had it for years and does very well with it. She has boyfriend and started driving. And poor dh getting his mri next week. Rt arm been hurting bad since spring. ?rotator cuff?

I have to stop listening to this country music. Its not helping. I have gotten myself into rut.

I am going to do dishes, clean up-no wonder i am crying. Chores!

I know what to do. Just venting. Pulling myself up. FUBC

CelineFlower · November 2012

purple bubbles... and cosmos.. they help

as for the country music... ya might be a tad depressing.. i like musical movies.. usualy more light hearted..

as for chores... ya.. i got a pile a dishes screaming at me too..

hope tomorow is better

celine

sbelizabeth · November 2012

Fredntan, I don't know where you live and what the weather's doing, but the BEST thing for you to do right now is to get outside and take a long, leisurely walk. Or ride your bicycle. Just get out of the house and get some exercise.

You don't even have to get too enthusiastic about it--just moving around in the fresh air will help you feel better. Do you have a dog? Take him/her along. He/she will be thrilled.

curveball · November 2012

And after you take your dog for a walk, curl up on the sofa and watch a funny movie. And here's a (((hug))). I hope you feel better soon.

Celtic_Spirit · November 2012

Many years ago, I got through a particularly hurtful breakup with a louse by watching the Blackadder series (a British comedy, can be found on DVD). I highly recommend it if you have a bawdy sense of humor. I literally laughed my way out of a depression. Exercise helps, too. And time. Just about everything gets better with time.

lkc · November 2012

dear girl, all normal feelings. we've all been there. Time helps.. trust me , but in the interim all of the above suggestions are good ones. Do something nice for yourself and try to keep in mind this isn't forever.

Moderators · November 2012

fredntan, we're so sorry that you're feeling down! Some great suggestions here, and if it feels more like a temporary funk that exercise and losing the country music don't help, tell your medical team how you're feeling too. You've been through so much.

Sadness, Depression and Fatigue, from the main Breastcancer.org site.

• Your Mods

Cookie44 · November 2012

I feel your pain! A good outfit, makeup and "retail therapy" can usually help me get out of a funk. It also helps to know that there are many of us out there who understand. xoxo

fredntan · November 2012

Thanks everyone, talked over my issues with hubby. Gawd he has been incredible. I never would have imagined.

I think i just have to start eating more. Just anything rightnow. I was on the cookie,candy diet last night:-)

Seems i allways have a setback after major event. I want to learn all this alkaline, etc etc stuff and sometimes I just dont know what to do next. I have vitamixer, i canmake some really green stuff in there. Broccoli shake doesnt work

My 16 yr old has been so moody lately. We have all been there. This too shall pass

I think i can go back to work in couple of weeks. That allways has helped. I found a good volunteer op near me. There is horse resque place. They will teach me to train the horses-when i am stronger. But they are also going to be working with wounded vets. We might be good combo. I have volunteered there before. Real friendly

Momine · November 2012

Fredntan, sounds like you have a few good strategies going on, cookies being a biggie I have the low weight and food thing going on too. I am on femara, so I am afraid to eat any cholesterol. My glucose has hovered close to 100 for a while, so I am afraid of carbs. You can't drink when you have BC. But my doc wants me to gain 5 pounds, which ought to be easy, but if you don't drink and don't eat sweets, meat or cheese, then it is actually quite tricky. So, yeah, I hear you on that. Last night I invited a friend for dinner and made beef and had more than a glass of wine. I even had sweets, but now I feel like I started using heroin or something

When I got hit by a wave of depression last month, I listened to old Prince tunes. Don't ask me why, but it helped. It certainly beats country

CherylinOhio · November 2012

fredntan, I have been and continue to be in that dark place, though I must say it is getting less and less with time. I worry about mets a lot! I want to get thru the 2-3 mark unscathed and I think I will let my guard down a tad. You are in good company here, we all vent at some point and we all listen and come to each others rescue. I think working with the horses is a great idea! I have horses and I love them all and they are great therapy. Horses are being used to treat breast cancer patients in the emotion sense of being treated. It is called hippotherapy, the use of horses for therapy and not just for cancer patients. If you are in front of a pc look it up there is a doctor who holds clinics for bc gals and their families, I can't remember where but what a good thing! Hang in there, it will get better and we all need to vent so let it out when needed and we will be there to help you pick yourself back up!!!

i guess i am depressed

Comments

Categories