Be Bold Be Bald Campaign - Your thoughts/feelings?

Eileen101
Eileen101 Member Posts: 93
edited June 2014 in Advocacy

I finished treatment in Jan. 2011, including 8 rounds of AC/T chemo. I've recently become aware of the "Be Bold, Be Bald" campaign where people will go "bald" on Nov. 2, wearing bald caps in honor of cancer patients. The proceeds from the sales of the caps go toward cancer support.

The link is here:  http://beboldbebald.org/

Am I the only one who is mortified by this? While I appreciate the sentiment and obvious good intentions, it horrifies me that people will don flesh-colored caps to support people like us. My thoughts are basically: 1) Bald is not beautiful, unless one chooses it. We've had it thrust upon us. We don't like losing our hair against our will and it doesn't make us feel better when others pretend to be bald also; 2) To pretend to be bald for a day somehow makes light of the horrific nature of what we have gone or go through.

What I'd like to say to the proponents of this campaign: If you want to raise money for cancer, my hat's off to you (no pun intended), but don't parade around "bald," all smiles, as if that somehow comforts me. Somehow it makes light, even brings a Halloweenish levity, to what I've been through. We don't need you to look ridiculous to make us feel we're not alone. You're doing so only makes us feel even more ridiculous. And while you're at it, don't go shaving your head to make a cancer patient feel better. Why would we want to inflict that on people we care about when we don't want it for ourselves? Please just be normal. God knows we're trying to be and long for the day when we can just look like ourselves again. One last thought: To wear a bald cap or shave your head doesn't begin to capture the ill health and side effects of chemo, or the steep climb toward health during recovery. Please don't pretend going bald is empathy when you still have your health, not to mention your eyebrows and lashes. Thank you for caring, but please don't pretend to step in our shoes. We hope and pray you never, ever know what it's like. We don't need that from you. Your compassion is enough.

My BC sisters, am I alone in this? I'd love to hear your gut reaction.

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Comments

  • Wabbit
    Wabbit Member Posts: 1,592
    edited October 2012

    Good rant!  My gut reaction is much like yours.  I cringe when I see some of these things.  And I agree that this one has shades of 'dressing up like a cancer patient'.  I know they mean well though so I don't generally say anything other than here.   

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  • CoolBreeze
    CoolBreeze Member Posts: 4,668
    edited October 2012

    Good lord, that's the dumbest thing I've heard of - in a long long line of dumb things.

    Is this supposed to be a national campaign or is it local?

    Reducing cancer to baldness is mistaken, for one thing.  As a woman with metastatic disease, I've been bald, I've had hair, I've been bald again but what I've always been is sick.  

    Instead of putting on bald caps, I think they ought to all inject themselves with the flu virus, so they can really sympathize.

    Geez.

    May have to blog this one!

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  • JRyan
    JRyan Member Posts: 178
    edited October 2012

    Wow. That is messed up. I completely agree with you Eileen101. This definitely falls in line with the stupid things that people do/say. I get that people are trying to be supportive, but there are many better ways to do that - like help someone going through chemo, clean their house, make them dinner, offer to shuttle their children to practice, etc. Practical help not pretending to be bald. Ugh.

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  • momof3boys
    momof3boys Member Posts: 896
    edited October 2012

    I think that's a horrible idea- how insulting. How naieve to think that being bald is the worst thing about undergoing treatment for cancer. I also hate it when people shave their heads in "support" of the cancer patient. They just don't get it.

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  • marjie
    marjie Member Posts: 1,134
    edited October 2012

    I can't even believe that I just read that!!!

    Stupid.  Insulting.

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  • marjie
    marjie Member Posts: 1,134
    edited October 2012

    I went to the site and sent my thoughts to them via their contact page.  I told them I thought is was offensive to say the least.

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  • CelineFlower
    CelineFlower Member Posts: 875
    edited October 2012

    i bet you someone is making money from it somewhere...

    this sickens me

    thank you for posting it

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  • Eileen101
    Eileen101 Member Posts: 93
    edited February 2013

    Wow, I've only now checked in after posting this so long ago. It took a while for the responses to come and I forgot about it. Good to hear I'm not the only one, which I suspected would be the case. I sure hope they got the message and don't parade around like that this year. And CelineFlower, I agree. Unfortunately, I'll bet someone is benefiting from this "brain child," although I hope not.

    Thanks to everyone for chiming in.

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  • hap_k
    hap_k Member Posts: 95
    edited September 2013

    I just found about the "Be Bold, Be Bald" campaign, so I came here to see if anyone else was horrified. Relieved that I'm not the only one! As Eileen said it makes light of something serious. How can they not see how bad this idea is? Would people all use crutches to show solidarity with those who do? Or pretend to be blind? What madness! Yet when I search the web for criticisms of this campaign, I can't find any. 

    I just posted my own rant to my Facebook friends before I checked breastcancer.org:

    "I find the whole idea well intentioned but totally naive. OK, she is not actually advocating that we shave our heads in solidarity with those with cancer, but that instead we should wear "a bald wig" (AKA "skull-cap") to honor those who fight the disease. Well, I have had chemo recently & been bald and I for one would not in the least feel honored by any friend or relative of mine imitating a side effect of my chemo treatment. God forbid that they should ever have to go through it for real, and I would only feel sickened by a reminder of horrible time in my life. If the cancer comes back, I may well need chemo again & will no doubt go bald again. That would be soon enough to revisit the subject of baldness, thank you very much!

    The point is that without the actual FEAR that accompanies cancer & the truly miserable side effects of chemo, no one can know what the experience feels like. Being bald is the least of it. It's a club you cannot join by visiting the hair salon, and trust me, you won't ever want to spend time in a chemo infusion room unless you absolutely must. There are better ways to fight cancer than donning a skullcap to look bald, or worse, shaving your head. How about working to ban GMO crops & pesticides that are poisoning the environment? How about taking good care of yourself, eating right, exercising, and being an advocate for better health care & most of all for better treatments for cancer, than what we have now--slash, burn, & poison?

    When I was bald, I loved to see people with beautiful hair. I loved to see health & vitality. If you want to honor those who are fighting cancer, share your love, don't shave your head! (Or even pretend to.) That's my two cents!"





     



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  • 1vamom
    1vamom Member Posts: 167
    edited September 2013

    Maybe people could pay to suddenly fear for their life, like, someone shows up with a gun to point it at their face, or, a doctor could tell them they have not long to live, and waits to tell them "just kidding".

    Yes, not funny, not helpful, not supportive at all.

    Just weird, with just a hint of mockery.

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