Sept 2012 chemo

Ohh Cindi so sorry you are feeling so worn out.  I am right there with you, this is my day 3 of AC#2 and definitely feel more tired this time around.  I am up and going though!  

I see there are alot of scared and angry sisters here.  We have all gone thru each of the feelings you are going through.  Please try to see this as a journey that you WILL make it through.  It sure is crappy alot of the time and I grieve daily for the "old me".  I know I can never go back, but choose to go forward and live each day to the fullest.  We invite you here to join us on this journey past cancer! 

Hello ladies

My name is Eva I'm 37 yo I was diagnosed with breast cancer on July 10 2012 sept 14 was my first AC treatment (3more to go) today is day 3 post AC and my energy is really low worst day however was Friday (the day of) around 4 hr after treatment I was shaking sweating and my nausea was unbearable fortunately pills help but nut to the point that it went away completely Saturday and sunday was much better besides being so weak my appetite is ...well I have no appetite water taste terrible but I still drink it hopefly this weaknes will pass and I will be able to do some things

Hope all af joy ladies have a wonderful day

Hi, Amy!  Thanks for starting this thread.  I start my chemo (TCx4) tomorrow.  Taking the steroids today, tomorrow, and Wednesday.  My lumpectomy was back in June, but I developed a post-surgery infection that set me back at least 9 weeks.  My infection was declared "clear" last Monday.  Saw MO on Wednesday, had my port implanted on Thursday and chemo starts tomorrow.  They will do my "chemo ovreview" while setting up my first drip!   My head is swimming.  I don't think the port will be healed enough to be useful, tomorrow, which I find discouraging and a little scary.  I have become quite frightened of all the needles.  (The needles prior to my lumpectomy just "did me in"!)  After chemo, I am traveling to a university hospital to have a second recision, to expand my clear margins, and radiation internal to the incision.  I am hoping to get it all done by Christmas - mostly because I have hit all my deductibles and want to start the New Year fresh - ha!

I haven't yet read all the posts, but am thankful to have "travel buddies" down this road.  Thanks, again,

Sherrie

BTW, I am 58 and post-menopausal.  I just updated my signature line, but it may not show up with this posting...

Hi there - YES - anger, I am right there with you.  I'm 11 days post chemo treatment #1 and have struggled with a lot of anger...ok, make that rage at times.  I came home on day 8, still feeling physically terrible despite taking all the nausea meds, drinking fluids and even after 6 hours getting IV fluids, still felt horrible.  So, I walked into my home and starting breaking things.  Small, inexpensive things, but still...I broke several things by smashing them to pieces on the file floor.  I recovered after about ten minutes, but in that ten minutes a whole flood of anger about this diagnosis came out of me.  Anger at being "chosen" for this experience.  Anger at being "chosen" for stage 3c.  Anger for having an especially "aggressive" form.  Grrrrrr.  It felt good to get the anger out, to acknowledge that along with the absolutely terror and grief I've experienced in such a brief time since being diagnosed (less than 60 days), that I am indeed very, very angry about it. 

I don't know anything to say except that I believe this is normal to be angry, that we are forced to deal with a terrible, scary threat to our very existence, become instant medical experts, and somehow also expected to put on a pink T-shirt and be cheerful.  To deal with the fact that our lives are not perfect, our families are not perfect, that we are going to have to suffer if we stand a chance of beating this thing.

What I will say to you is I send you lots of love and light and hope that you are one of the strong ones who can take the treatment and come out on the other side with most of your life intact - or even better, if that is possible.  I surely do wish those things for me, though they seem so unlikely right now. 

Kelley 

Thx Cherioo, its the prebuzz look

Butterfly,

Wow, opposite sides of the country and we both received the life changing news the same day.

Butterfly and internutz1, I am right there with you, I am at the angry point, mine more directed towards my MO, who told me that no one can make the chemo decision for me (I get that, I want to know pros and cons, thats all I am asking,be direct. I have only a 7 week education in Cancer all internet based, he has 20+ years) if I decide I want to "bother" with chemo, Really Bother... 

Kelley,

BIG hugs Sister. 

Movinonmom Are you serious? How are you suppose to know what's best? Isn't that what you are paying him for. It's not like surgery where they should tell you what your options are and you choose. What a moron. I think I would be looking for a new MO.

KellyB, I broke a plate once.  I noticed that it had a chip on iit before I smashed it to the floor.  I  understand anger.  For you, with job and young children, this isn't right or fair.  It isn't fair for anyone.  Cancer is the enemy

." The United States spends 58 percent of the total defense dollars paid out by the world's top 10 military powers, which combined for $1.19 trillion in military funding in 2011.

6,280 total US Military Deaths Afghanistan  & Iraq. 

3033 deaths from Muslim terrorism including 9/11 until today.

 I tried to get the figure for annual cancer deaths, but there are other factors.  We are all going to die of something.  Age must play into it.  This is the best I could do in a brief time.

"The American Cancer Society estimates that 1,399,790 men and women (720,280 men and 679,510 women) will be diagnosed with and 564,830 men and women will die of cancer of all sites [meaning, of all cancer types] in 2006."

We need to tell our representatives to spend more on research in preventing and treating cancer instead of defense.  Priorities are screwed up.  There is a good place to direct your anger.  More productive.  Also, to you sisters too young for medicare, no one in this rich country should be denied essential medical care because they don't have insurance.  All should have coverage.  I am an economist, and I tell you we CAN afford it.

Hugs to all of you.  This site has kept me sane over the last two months. 

Movingonmom, I know I still remember the total disbelief at the word cancer and my name in the same sentence. I couldn't to this day tell anyone with certainty what my doctor said after those words.

I don't think there is ever a good time to get cancer, like JoJo, my middle child just graduated high school, oldest starting his senior year of college and youngest going into sophomore year. Work doing great, went back to school in January to up my degree and job bidding abilities and bam.....cancer and a crash course in medical terms.

Bright side laugh, my husband and I decided we may be able to go on a cruise from the money that I will save on hair care products when this is over. Still nervous about losing the hair, DonnaD08, I wish I had your courage to just shave it, my husband said he would when the time comes.

Anger and fear are such a part of this, i really hope that we all  have the strength to get to the other side, stronger.

Carla 

Sherbab- so your hair started falling out already huh?     I think mine is very close to that.  My scalp hurts SO BAD today.  I have noticed when I run my hand through my hair that I can quite often come away with about 10 strands in my hand- so, not a ton but definately more than normal.  I am not ready for that part yet!!!

Wow!! My legs are killing me. Feels like I ran a marathon. I'm assuming this is from the Neulasta shot I had on Saturday? Bring on the pain meds! Stay strong girls!!!

Hi all.  I've been lurking around the site for more than a few weeks now. First, when I was trying to find information on my reconstruction of choice (DIEP Flap) and now for the chemo info.

 I start Cytoxan & Taxotere this Thursday, September 20. I will have one day of chemo with three weeks off for a total of four chemo days. To the best of my knowledge I will be receiving both drugs at the same time; however, from what I can see here, it looks like most of you are receiving one drug and then the other.

Can anyone tell me if I will feel lethargic/sick/nauseous/flu-like the entire four month period or will it mainly be immediately following the chemo days?

 I'm sorry I sound so uninformed. I am, usually a clear-minded, well-spoken 44-year-old woman. Unfortunately, breast cancer has managed to reduce me to a confused, babbling child!

Thanks for being patient with me! LOL

twinsplus1- I am 6 weeks PFC after 6 rounds of Cytoxan/Taxotere.  I'm not sure how much you already know about our chemo regimen.  As the recommendation of my onco to help prevent nail damage, I iced my nails (toes and fingers) and also polished them with clear nail polish.  She had recommended Sally Hansen Hard As Nails clear polish which I initially tried. I found that the polish chipped too easily so I switched to Essie All in One Base which I use along with Essie Mademoiselle (transluscent pink.)   Since I had an onco appt before every chemo, she inspected my nails then.  If ice your nails, you will do so only for the Taxotere infusion.  If you can and are planning to ice your nails, let me know.  I can either private message you what I did and/or give you the link to where I previously posted that info.

As far as when you might feel the chemo, it is different fot everyone.  I had my chemo on Tuesdays, felt fine enough to run errands, etc on Wednesday & Thursday, felt a little tired/a little yuck on Friday and spent Saturday & Sunday taking it easy and resting.  I took Decadron (steroid) the day before chemo, the day of chemo and the day after chemo.  The Decadron kept me wired so I did not sleep at night very well Wednesday, Thursday and Friday evenings.  I slept well Tuesday evenings after chemo because of the Benedryl and Ativan(anti-anxiety med) I had in my IV.  For those nights I don't sleep well, I don't fret or get anxious about not sleeping.  I just know that I will sleep later but not then.  My taste buds usually went on vacation a few days after getting the chemo which lasted at least a week.  I just ate whatever I could and tried to ignore the fact that the food may look good but not taste the way it normally does.  Perhaps I was lucky that my side effects were minimal and usually recovered after the chemo treatment fairly quickly.  I felt fine the 2nd and 3rd weeks weeks after the chemo round.  I made sure that I ate healthy, rested when my body let me know I needed to rest and got out of the house almost everyday to get some exercise.

If you need some more info, just private message or post again here!!!!  Ready to help you so you will be ready for Thursday!!!  HUGS...... you will be ready for Thursday!!!!!! 

I chopped may hair even shorter and feel the black cloud Donna has spoke of... Its def looming overhead and my hair is gonna be on its way out real soon!

I have not yet gotten angry I have just been rolling with it and taking each day in stride. I can say that I am getting more depressed as wednesday approaches for my second round on dose dense A/C. When you feel good and have to go make yourself sick it is just backwards..

Hope all of you ladies are hanging in there and doing what it takes to show cancer who the real boss is!

 I will be getting my ninja blender o0n wednesday so I will really be able to make some amazing smoothies that will pack a punch. 

Hugs to all and I will touch base on wednesday to fill you all in on how I feel. I plan to start claritin tomorrow in preperation for the so lovely nuelasta shot on Thursday.. Fun Fun

Off to bed with my melatonin in hand... Much love and support to all of you!