Distracted, unfocused, undisciplined and just plain lazy

Ok, not trying to be a downer but I completed chemo summer of 2009 and I am still lazy, unfocused and demotivated!

I only want to do fun stuff.  I keep thinking I want to go back to work but then when it comes to making that decision I push it off.  Mostly because there are just days where I feel like crap and how in the heck am I going to force myself to go to work when I hurt like hell from the tamoxifen? 

I get stressed out if I have more than 2 things to do daily and that includes housecleaning, laundry or whatever.

I think you are normal but then again I want to think I am normal also

I will say my ability to focus has drastically improved the last year.  I still have chemo brain but not to the extent that I was at a year ago.

cfdr- Just saw your last 2 post, glad you set yourself a routine, like the timer idea! I actually was going to mention having your thryoid checked  but forgot about it. That very well may be the problem i also had mine checked last thursday dr wanted blood tests and i said can you do a thryoid test as well. Was told that test is sent out so may have to wait a little longer to get results back.

Hope it is somthing not serious but something they can fix for you. Please keep us posted. hugs!

RE: "normal thyroid: TSH/thyroid stimulating hormone."  Also, important to check T3, T4 if TSH is high.

Several labs still use a "scale from .5 to 6" for normal" TSH.  Since 2003 the American Society of Endocrinologists have said a TSH blood test should be BELOW 2.5

From my experience - I would NOT ACCEPT a report of "normal" on a TSH test.  Ask to see the actual lab results, see the NUMBER reported for a test.   My first TSH test was 5.9, and report just said "normal" - thank goodness I'd been warned by friends, and checked it further ( and got another doc!)- all this information is online now too.

cfdr

don't underestimate the SE of being on an AI - and that's fatigue.  When Arimidex was only a brand, Astra Zeneca, the FIRST on the list of SE's was Asthenia ( and it wasn't alphabetical order) - I ggogled it.  It covers too much to put into one word, but when I posted in on the AI SE thread started by lowrider in the Hormone Forum, some wise woman defined Asthenia = "Greek for feels like crap."

Exercise, lots of Vitamin D, Fish Oil, and more exercise, seems to be the way most of us on an AI are trying to deal with the fatigue, after all the other tests, which  you're wisely doing, are done.

Good luck with the B12 injections.  I take it pill form, from the health food store, sublingually, seems to work for many.  But good you've found out your need for the injections.  Seems like SO MUCH we have to stay on top of, doesn't it....

cfdr

the only factor we haven't mentioned is - TIME.  One of my nurses in oncology who also had bc, said she thinks it takes at least 3 years to get back to our "pre bc" levels of energy.  I can't remember, but I know at about 8 months from starting, which it seems you are, I was still VERY VERY VERY tired.  I refuse to say age might be a factor, but I was 62 at diagnosis.  Really think, from what you're saying, it is a matter of TIME, TIME, TIME...be gentle with yourself - lots of healing to do.  best wishes

Pam- Just about everyone i talked to that is taking arimadex or any of the hormone therapy drugs have said the same things as you, i had to make the decision myself to quit them because of not just the energy problems but severe bone pain. Also have you had your iron checked could be your anemic but i bet the problem your having may be the Arimadex. Sorry you are feeling this bad. Best Wishes.

Hugs, Debbie

Pam, cfdr,

It our oncologists think the SE's are an "annoyance" - PLEASE remind them, that COMPLIANCE, women continuing to take the medications that may be saving their lives - is one of the factors many GOOD oncologists work so, so, so, so hard to deal with, help their patients.  Sorry about the RANT, but I just get so furious, sad, when women don't get the support they need.

It was my ONCOLOGIST who suggested I try ACUPUNCTURE for the SE's - joint pain, weakness -  and it was SUCH a positive experience.  For me, the first year on Arimidex was the most difficult, and I thank every day, the wonderful women who post in the Hormonal Forum, SE's of the AI's started by lowrider.

Please check out that thread - it really is a goldmine of information, I know it's long, but valuable. I'm sure womone has already asked the question you might have - how to help with the SE's.  Really - it DOES get better.

Oh, Pam, I HEAR you.  Really - I think it gets better in time, but I don't think being on an AI is ever easy.  I'm not sure what "normal" means anymore, I kow that some days are MUCH better than others - and the fact we've had about 3 weeks of RAIN, RAIN, cold rain, is not making it easier.

Never worry about ranting - I'm sure someone of us is about to join you, at any given moment.  Also so important to KNOW in the depths of our respective hearts that we are NOT "making this up" - and any oncologist who doesn't GET IT, really, should, have to take an AI.

Ok, so i called my MO this morning and asked if i could stop taking them for a little while. I know he is going to want me to try a different one. So far i have been on arimedex two times, tamoxifen and femara. I could barely walk out of work last night and when i got home i went straight to bed. That's a first for me. I keep trying to tell myself i feel better then i did when i was doing chemo. lol

Apple, I think you are a great inspriration at whatever % you are fuctioning at!! I am your secret stalker (just kidding) but i have read many of your posts and have always learned something from them, or i have come away with a smile. I hope you are feeling good now and for many years to come.

Pam 

I am not on any hormone therapy and can totally relate! It has been almost 3 years since my prophy BMX but now my BS codes all my stuff as breast cancer I guess due to the ADH and papillomatosis that has plagued me for 5 years prior to the BMX. I have had multiple surgeries and reconstructions and it has been 9 months from the last procedure and I still have no energy and easily get distracted.

My work situation has created extreme anxiety and depression and now I am seeing a counselor and my GP who have me on Anti-depressant therapy which may be beginning to work some. My Mother is a hoarder and her house is a disaster and I can see my condo as becoming her house so I must find some energy and focus to clean it up. My DH is of no help and fortunately can overlook my laziness and clutter (he has his own clutter).

Talk about unfocused - I am off today for a personal day and just got a work related phone call because somehow I put my home phone number on the form instead of my work number and the sad thing is it's not the first time it has happened since work and home are in the same phone exchange with the same area code and first 3 numbers. At least I was home to take the call as DH can sometimes be rude on the phone when it is someone he does not know (has some anger issues associated with alcoholism).

Hang it there you have been through a lot and it takes time to heal physically and emotionally and it will eventually get better.