Went into Surgery Stage 2, Came Out 3A

tball...I'm sorry you've found yourself here with us, the III forum is full of support and info though, we've been through it all.  My stage didn't change, I did chemo before my BMX.  Chemo isn't easy but very managable with the help of meds and it will clear up any loose BC that got away, that's an advantage to a III dx.  During chemo I saw my tumor shrink and IBC leave, it was very reassuring seeing it work.  Here's hoping everything goes well for you and congrats on clear margins.  Come here often, we're here. 

I went into surgery thinking I was Stage 1 and woke up to news that i was Stage 3. I know what a huge blow that is. I had 6 positive nodes that didn't show up on the MRI, and what was thought to be several small tumors were actually attached by DCIS, making my official tumor size over 5cm. Ouch. But I'm almost a year out now, and the good news is that the treatment is totally manageable - not fun, but doable. My hair is growing back, I just ran my first-ever 5K, and I feel great. The period right after diagnosis was the most difficult for me, and I think you'll start feeling better once you have a treatment plan in place and are working to get that cancer out of your body once and for all. You can and will do this!

teeballmom, take deep breath and listen to the wise women here. Looking up Stages can be deceptive as the prognostic information is always based on older statistics, usually five to ten years old. So many changes have come down the way in those years, that based on recent changes in protocols, I'm sure we'll see improved statistics in a few years.



There's not a big difference in Stage 2B vs Stage 3A (I ended up moving into Stage 3 after surgery, too). If anything, the drs take a more serious look at you and follow you up more closely. I like having that security blanket.

My surgeon expected to find 3cm lump after the second surgery to clean up margin it turned out to be 7.3 cm Invasive Lobular is sneeky. The size of the lump made me stage 3

I went being told I was stage 1 and came out stage 3. Half of all my nodes taken we positive and I was pregnant at the time. The odds between 2b and 3a are very little difference.. I to had a 5, 7 and 8 year old at the time and pregnant.

 I not have a 8,10,and 11 year old and my baby is 2 and half... There is TONS of stage 3 survivor stories! You will be ok!!!

teeballmom, I got my dx in 9-10 and had neoadjuvant treatment.  I was staged as a 2 at the time and then had chemo followed by surgery in 4-11.  I went into the surgery having been told the chemo shrunk the tumor but when I came out of surgery I was staged as a IIIA.  I was devastated!  I just didn't understand what happened, how it could have changed but then my NO saw how shocked I looked and explained to me that I didn't have a change in staging, it meant that I was always a III and they didn't know that until I had surgery and that is the point where you know your real staging.  It was still hard to accept but the more I thought about it the easier it was for me to accept that I was always a III and they just didn't know it.  I went on to rads and that was okay.  I know the Herceptin, chemo, rads and surgery knocked the cancer out of me. 

I'm a year past treatment including my year of Herceptin, my hair has grown back and I'm feeling good.  I'm on 5 years of Arimidex and have been on that 9 mos. already.  I'm finding Stage III doesn't matter anymore and I'm getting on with life.  I have truncal lymphedema and that bothers me but after coming through this, I know you can do it.  I'm followed closely, at first 3 mos. by my MO and 6 mos. by my BS and 6 mos by RO.  I've had mammos, MRI, ultrasound, everything is fine.  It hasn't been an easy journey but this website has so much info to help you through.

Your friends sound wonderful and I'm so glad you had them with you and now you have a new set of friends here to help you.  My MO is so upbeat right now with me and her findings of late on Herceptin that she said they can't keep up with the statistics, they're all old and when the new 5 year stats come out even they'll be old but they'll show how treatment is succeeding for us.  You can see this by the many women who check in who have been dx so many years ago.  I feel like you and I will join them and you have every reason to believe you'll see your kids live their lives and someday make you a grandma if that's what you want. 

teeballmom, Just be sure to take someone with you when you see your MO on Monday.  Talk of treatment can be a bit overwhelming and it's helpful for someone to take notes or ask questions that you won't think of...that reminds me, it's also helpful if you have a list of questions ready to ask your MO.  If you haven't been asked yet if you want a port they'll probably ask you then and you can decide.  My BS said I needed one and I didn't even know what a port was and I'm glad I got it, in fact, I just had it removed recently.  My RO said it was time to come out even though I wanted to keep it longer and I just saw my BS and she said it's time it came out because they only like to have them in a year after chemo and then it's time to get on with your life. 

You'll probably lose your hair.  I thought I could handle that okay but when it happened I didn't do so well.  Talk about devastating!  I waited until after I started chemo to get a wig and was sorry I waited.  I just didn't want to think about it and then was sick from chemo trying them on and couldn't wait to leave the store.  The one thing I did right was have my hair cut the day before starting chemo, short but not real short, something I could live with and my hair didn't come out until between the second and third chemo so I was lucky for awhile.  You might want scarves and I wore those too.  At home I just went topless but you'll have to explain it all to your kids.  You'll take it harder than they will...kids are so resilient.  Maybe you'll have friends who can pitch in at times you might feel overly tired.  Some women here worked all the way through chemo.  You just never know how it will affect you until you go through it.  I hope it is easy for you, or as easy as it gets.  The nurses who administer it are usually quite wonderful and caring and understanding.  God bless them.     

Same, I went in to surgery as IIa and came out as IIIc (after neoadjuvant chemo!) now testing for IV and still haven't even finished initial treatment!! Ah well ... Such is life! I can't afford to get caught in the stats... Just live well and keep on keeping on... anyway I figure I could get run over by a bus tomorrow so why fixate on BC



Teeballmum so glad to hear you like your nurses they are really important. I got a wig but wore it once yuk! I wore scarves. My sister had
bc first diagnosed when her kids were 12 & 6 she was always very honest with them and they
handled it pretty well. She died in 1999 when they
were 11 & 17 they had a rough 2-3 yrs but both
are very stable now and talk very normally about
their mum. Not a perfect childhood for them but they are both good, successful and happy people.

I encourage you to visit some of the chemo threads especially those which were started during the last few months.  You will find great support and tips and help about chemo.  I'm on the April/May 2012 chemo hangout and found the gals on that thread so helpful.  Doesn't matter when you start your chemo.... please join us !!!!!  If you have questions, do not hesistate to ask.  As you have already found out, there is a practical side to our journeys so getting a little guidance and helps make the chemo very doable.  Looking forward to seeing you there!!!!

My staging was 3 even before surgery, but I had hoped for no cancer in the nodes after neo-adjuvant chemo, and that didn't pan out. So I can relate to the shocked feelings.

It was hard for me too to come to terms with the idea that this is a chronic disease and not something you can ever fully put behind you. As time passes and the effects of treatment fade out, I increasingly feel OK about the whole business. The disease may be chronic, but survival rates are really pretty good, so I choose to focus on that and move on as best I can. 

I think a journal of positive goals is a really good idea. Make sure to include some short term ones as well. It really helped me through treatment to set up "treats" for myself along the way. I would buy a present for myself after each chemo, for example, preferably something pretty, like a new scarf or a nice perfume. We also took trips and visited friends in the country. Whatever you can do to make that time pleasant and fun will help it go by faster.

Oh, and if you possibly can, get a house cleaner. If you can't get one, when people ask if they can do anything to help, have them come clean your house, seriously. You will have less energy, so take steps not to waste it on boring stuff. As my surgeon said, this is the time to put yourself first without guilt of any kind.

.

You'd think!!!!

I actually complained to her supervisor. 

Argh! What a great thing to tell you. Yes, people will say the most unfortunate things.