April/May 2012 Chemo hang out
Comments
-
Nofear- I had Ativan in my IV today before my infusion started. It definitely does keep the anxiety down and allows me to nap and rest. Infusion day is the only time I take the drug. Good luck with the infusion. We will be thinking of you and will continue to support you through this.
-
Melrosemelrose: I take it the night before and also the day of, and the day after because of the steriods cause me to not be able to sleep.
-
kjliberty- Somehow through all of this, I manage to get 6-7 hours of sleep a night except for the first night of Decadon. I usually come home and nap after my infusion so I catch up on that sleep.
-
Thanks all...but I'm not done yet guys!!! Still have one to go and the SE afterwards. However I see the light at the end of the tunnel...we are all getting closer!
-
Melrosemelrose: You are so lucky. My body is so tired, but sleep escapes me. It's like my body FIGHTS to not sleep. It is very exhausting. I am like a zombie slug (after chemo for 5-7 days). My body thinks sleep is the enemy. It's very frustrating. Hence the need for drugs (ambien gives me 4-5 hours max)
-
Ow. I hope my port doesn't feel like this in the morning. I can hardly move. I feel like a wimp.
-
Marcia111- Unfortunately, it pretty typical for the port area to hurt after placement. Take some tylenol or advil. You may have to prop, Hey you are no wimp!!!!! My surgeon had warned me that sometimes the port placement hurts more than breast surgery. He was right on when i had mine placed!!! If you are going into chemo this week, make sure they spray the port area with numbing lidocaine spray. After that, you can ask for a prescription for the EMLA cream that you can apply at home about an hour before your infusion. It will get better!!!!!
-
Marcia1111, it's okay! No need to feel like a wimp because it hurts for now and we've been assuring you the procedure isn't bad (by comparison, say, to BMX). Someone else - I can't remember who - said she felt like they must have twisted her into some odd position during the procedure, based on the way she felt afterward. One other thing that occurred to me also is, you have TEs, so your skin is already being stretched, and the port is stretching it a little bit more. I know mine felt tight/stretched for awhile at first, and I had a lot of soreness up that side of my neck.
I hope you have something to take for pain relief and/or for sleep. It will get better!
-
Thanks, Melrose. I start on Thursday. I already have the cream. Wish I could use it now! I skipped the Advil and Tylenol and went straight for the Percoset!
-
Kjiberty- I am not sure where I get the energy. I am motivated to travel partly because exercise is supposed to help fatigue and partly because "doing" makes time fly. And it's my life/profession. My biggest energy sapper is carrying this huge purse full of "just in case" meds. I will be beat as I go into chemo #4 just as I return but plan to stay home and rest through the entire round.
-
Dance...no kidding...I went to the market the other day and I was so tired after I actually asked if I could get assistance to my car...that was day 10...this stuff can really kick your butt.
Indigo...thanks for the warm welcome back!
This 2nd tx really did me in...physically and emotionally...I got really depressed...maybe its just all settling in...I'm usually running around like a crazy person but I just can't do it and I feel like other people are judging me...I'm trying to let that go and go at my own pace but its hard.
I am doing my BMX after my chemo and I just heard about a breast implant on tv called gummy bears...I think I remember seeing someone on here mention them. Anyone know anything about them?
Cindy
-
marcia - my port was really sore for about 3 days - couldn't use my arm much at all - you aren't a wimp! After that, though, it improved markedly and within a few weeks I didn't notice it at all. (Although I still get occasional twinges of discomfort now and again.)
FightingLikeaGirl - I understand. Try not to worry about what others may think - they have no clue what it's like to go through the trauma of diagnosis, surgery, chemo, etc. We gain a whole new appreciation for what is important and worth worrying about after this diagnosis. And worrying about what others are thinking is SO not worth our time and energy. I know it's easy for me to say, but I have REALLY been working on this over the past year. Now, when I start worrying about what someone may be thinking about me, I look in the mirror and just say "Really?" As in, "Girl, you have been through hell, and are fighting for your life. And you really are going to waste energy on THIS?"
-
Khliberty, good point. I too am lucky that treatment is about 15 minutes from my house. I feel for those who have a long way to get there.
Had a good day yesterday! day 7, with neulasta. Day before was a funky low- but yesterday was like a'75-80% kind of day. Found myself dancing to 70s music in the kitchen .
Not expected but motivating, like I may get back to this some day. Very flushed cheeks which was odd this far from steroids.(?) I did look rosy! Hope that is the only new thing. This when new SEs have at times reared their heads.Still swishing for thrush- thanks dancetrancer, I got fluoride fom my dentist. Plus she suggested biotene mouthwash which I got. Now 3 different kinds of rinses -
FightingLikeaGirl-I know how you feel after the #2 round of chemo. I was so emotional and having mini crying meltdown from out of the blue. I would just tear up suddenly and couldn't figure out the source. I decided it was partly the chemo since my hormones are now going to chemopause and the other part was excitement/stress of my DD coming home for a 2 week visit from college and my DS's high school graduation which i couldn't attend. The rest, I attributed to releasing all of the feelings and emotions that have accompany this journey. A lot of physical and emotional changes have happened since my diagnosis. It was just time to let go. My support system here is very understanding of my meltdowns and reassure me that it doesn't change their feelings or how much they care for me. As for the rest of the public world, I don't care what anyone thinks. I'm doing what I need to do to save my life on my time and on my terms. Like dancetrancer says, it is truly a waste of your valuable time to be concerned with what others are thinking. Somewhere inside of you is that confident woman who can take on the world--- find her and take on your world and not everyone else's!!! Chin up, girlfriend...... you can do this!!!!!
As for the gummies, I've heard of them but they seem a little controversial . That's all I know.
-
I get dazed and think, what am I doing? What do they mean a life threatening disease? when people say must be tough being sick, I always feel like-- I am not sick! I am BRCA1 positive, I had a small tumor and gene mutation I had to deal with. Yeah, by Oopharectomy (nov) bc diagnosis (jan) BMX(feb), and chemo(april)
The treatment is what has made me "sick." maybe im being grumpy. I finish chemo June 20 and hope to get my TE/implants surgery at the end of July and be done with treatment. I dont think my PS uses gummies, need to talk about plans Gotta be ready to start the 2012-13 school year.
This chat board is a godsend to me. Your stories help me get through this And I send good vibes to all. (californian, obviously!) -
Lisa2012. You're feelings are completely normal....I try to think of the sick feeling from chemo and other side effects as proof it's kicking cancers ass.
I hate it when people refer to me as "sick" I'm not sick....I was diagnosed with breast cancer....and now that I'm post surgery and halfway through chemo...I don't say I have cancer....as far as I'm concerned the cancer is gone....chemo is just the medicine that's making sure it won't come back....
I'm back in the chair today for my first taxol treatment. -
When I was in the hospital recovering my UMX surgery, a hospital clergy man came to visit me. We chatted for quite a while. I told him that it was my body that was sick and needed help to heal but my mind was not sick. In fact, I told him that my mind is strong and I'm positive about everything. He told me that he has rarely heard anyone say that but he wholehardly agreed that it was a very good way to view my journey and a good things that I am able to separate my mind from my body. My resolve is still the same as it always has been--- to be positive and always allow myself the latitude I need to get through every phase of my treatment. In short, being kind to myself and walk through this journey with the best positive attitude and outlook as I can have and as calmly and peacefully as I can. I have my emotional times like everyone else but I let those happen and move forward. Sending lots of HUGS and support to all!!!!! We are stronger together than separately!!!!
-
I get really tired of people telling me I look so GOOD! What am I supposed to look like? Gray & whithered?
As far as I'm concerned, the cancer left when I had my BMX. The chemo is to make sure it never comes back. I have no hair, my TE's don't look like anything but bumps on my chest. I'm doing the best I can to have as normal a life as I can at this moment in time.
Only we know what goes on in our minds. The emotions that no one else sees. You look in the mirror & wish you could turn back time or fast forward to when you look like the you, you used to know. We are all changed permanently. We'll never look at life the same. Every moment has become more precious.
I find myself not sweating the small stuff so much anymore.
I hope everyone is doing well & has light SE's!
-
Morning all, you rock!!!
True confession time - I have tears in my eyes because I feel what you feel - but, like you are saying, without this support I'd be one big ball of depression. My DH has some major health issues - has had for some time, and doesn't handle them very well, so in addition to the BC, chemo, etc., a lot depends on me. In fact, this morning we are taking him to the doc because he had a spell with his eye last night and we need to make sure no detached retina (he has diabetes). Right in the middle of nadir - but I am trying to prove to him (and to me) there is no excuse for not dealing with stuff, even fear.
I am with Husker123 - my MO has said, and I tell myself every day, the cancer has been taken out and all of this followup is to keep it from coming back. Mostly I've been able to look at this whole process as a job I have to do for me - and for my DH and sons and family. Not to say there are days that I get scared, and sick of it all and don't want to do it. Even little rebellions, like blowing off the soda/saltwater gargles because I don't feel like it; I know, it sounds stupid and childish. But sometimes I get tired of being the adult.
Another teeny rant - I also hate being hypersensitized to every little bit of news about cancer and BC. So yesterday they break this great news about some blood test that is supposed to help identify risk of recurrence. And at the end of that news clip - they say we are a long way away from those of us mere mortals (other than people in clinical trials, probably) having that available to them. Hmmm. And even when that test is available, what we really need, acc. to Dr. Nancy Snyderman, is a way to treat cancer on a cellular level. After I process all that, I'll think it's good for my nieces and future grandkids, but it doesn't do much for me at this point; I'm still fighting this by using the method of smashing an ant with a cannonball. But as I told DH, the ant's still dead.
A lot of people also tell me how great I look. I know that can sound to us like "How can you be dealing with this - it's hard to believe if you don't look like a cancer patient!" Maybe that is what some of them really mean. I hear these messages, too: "You are still beautiful. You make me think that if this happens to me, I can do it too." or "Girlfriend, I know it's important to you to look good no matter what. You do!" I guess I'm a vain little diva in a lot of respects, but like I posted on another board, me feeling like I can still turn someone's head feels like winning.
Lol - after this little sermon, I will also tell you that I went to Starbucks this a.m., in my head buff, no makeup, no boobies. Those baristas understand - they're lucky I got dressed (usually I do the drive-through in my pajamas).
I love you all. Hugs and purple energy - we're kicking a** with the big boots, don't forget!
-
Can't even think of anything to add...you have all said it so well and put it in perspective. Amen!
-
I keep meaning to tell you, Mary71 - I love your avatar pic!
-
@Lisa2012 - I know just what you mean. A family said I "had cancer" the other day and I was like "whoaaaa...I do not have cancer! They got that bugger out!"
I think my family would prefer I have the weepies instead of the grumpies but they're stuck with them!
-
New mantra! We're kicking @ss with the big boots! Love it!
-
lsharvey822 - Yep! The woman who manages my favorite breakfast/brunch spot is a survivor herself (ovarian cancer), worked through all her chemo, is done now and her long blonde hair has grown back. She's a pint-sized warrior in my book - the kind of manager who goes to every table to make sure your meal was great and to visit with you. She told me when I shared my dx with her, a few days before my surgery, that she gets up every day (still) and says to herself, "Better strap on the bigger boots, so you can keep kicking bigger a**!" Melrose and I have been telling ourselves that ever since.
I will never forget, back two years or so ago, before I knew she was in chemo, I admired *her* hair one day - only to have my coworker tell me after she had walked away that it was a wig! I felt mortified. But that wasn't what she wanted of course, and now - I feel differently. When someone admires my hair I smile and say thanks, just like she did!
-
IndigoMont11- You and I have been kicking butt with our big girl sparkly boots and spreading purple healing energy everywhere we go!!!! It gives me the boost, smiles and laughter when I"m down so I can just keep pushing forward!!!! We are together across the miles and sending lots of (((HUGS))) and wrap ourselves in a warm blanket of prayers, healing, positive and calming thoughts to you and everyone!!!!
-
I had to lie to a lady in the grocery store yesterday. We only know each other to say hi. She kept telling me how great I looked and how she loved my hair (wig). Then she wanted to know where I had it done. We live in a town of 7000 people, so I had to say I went into the city..lol.. easier then going down the BC road. I've had a few strangers comment on my "hair" , I just say thanks. Although I feel like a faker.
My family and I went to the wave pool last weekend, I went proudly with my bald head and 1 boob. Had fun with my children. Got many funny looks, but this is who I am right now, so dont look if you dont like. My kids and hubby were ok with it and thats what is important.
My port is fine now, implanted the first week in May. BUt I have 2 3 year olds who are always on me, they often push on it which does hurt.
I too dont feel sick. On my good week, I go about life as normal. Havent worked since March, only worked weekends do to the kiddos, and it didnt seem worth it to keep up, we need the family time. Maybe this is a wake up call to slow down and enjoy a simpler life.
-
" Maybe this is a wake up call to slow down and enjoy a simpler life."
Exactly Babysammy. Agree 100%
Chapter4 & Nofear: hope your first Taxols go well today. Report back!
I want to ask everyone here as a whole... Before you were diagnosed was your life really stressful? We're you super high stress, just getting by, working yourself too hard or giving too much of yourselves to other people??? nurturing others and other things but not yourselves??
Everyone I have talked to who has had any kind of cancer diagnosis has said that life was highly stressful for months or years before their diagnosis. I'm just curious if you ladies feel the same. -
I have to answer Yes, AshleyB. It seemed like I was always at somebodys beck & call. Not so much now. I will myself to walk away from some situations I wouldn't have before.
Have to tell you a funny one. I live in a small rural area. I know the grocery store owner really well. I walked in there today & Mike hollars at me, "Hey hippie, get a haircut!" It just hit me really funny because he meant it in a fun way. He's done a lot to keep my mood up.
-
Hi..first treatment done..5 more to go..and as the man said falling out the 50th floor window as he passed the 10th floor..so far so good!!!
no bad reaction ...yet..hoping it don't....
on the stress before ..not here..I'm a very laid back person...but i'm triple neg..and i don't think they know what causes this one..other than genetics..and I do not fit that pattern..so...
-
I knew I had big feet for a reason. Kick, kick, kick!!!!
Categories
- All Categories
- 679 Advocacy and Fund-Raising
- 289 Advocacy
- 68 I've Donated to Breastcancer.org in honor of....
- Test
- 322 Walks, Runs and Fundraising Events for Breastcancer.org
- 5.6K Community Connections
- 282 Middle Age 40-60(ish) Years Old With Breast Cancer
- 53 Australians and New Zealanders Affected by Breast Cancer
- 208 Black Women or Men With Breast Cancer
- 684 Canadians Affected by Breast Cancer
- 1.5K Caring for Someone with Breast cancer
- 455 Caring for Someone with Stage IV or Mets
- 260 High Risk of Recurrence or Second Breast Cancer
- 22 International, Non-English Speakers With Breast Cancer
- 16 Latinas/Hispanics With Breast Cancer
- 189 LGBTQA+ With Breast Cancer
- 152 May Their Memory Live On
- 85 Member Matchup & Virtual Support Meetups
- 375 Members by Location
- 291 Older Than 60 Years Old With Breast Cancer
- 177 Singles With Breast Cancer
- 869 Young With Breast Cancer
- 50.4K Connecting With Others Who Have a Similar Diagnosis
- 204 Breast Cancer with Another Diagnosis or Comorbidity
- 4K DCIS (Ductal Carcinoma In Situ)
- 79 DCIS plus HER2-positive Microinvasion
- 529 Genetic Testing
- 2.2K HER2+ (Positive) Breast Cancer
- 1.5K IBC (Inflammatory Breast Cancer)
- 3.4K IDC (Invasive Ductal Carcinoma)
- 1.5K ILC (Invasive Lobular Carcinoma)
- 999 Just Diagnosed With a Recurrence or Metastasis
- 652 LCIS (Lobular Carcinoma In Situ)
- 193 Less Common Types of Breast Cancer
- 252 Male Breast Cancer
- 86 Mixed Type Breast Cancer
- 3.1K Not Diagnosed With a Recurrence or Metastases but Concerned
- 189 Palliative Therapy/Hospice Care
- 488 Second or Third Breast Cancer
- 1.2K Stage I Breast Cancer
- 313 Stage II Breast Cancer
- 3.8K Stage III Breast Cancer
- 2.5K Triple-Negative Breast Cancer
- 13.1K Day-to-Day Matters
- 132 All things COVID-19 or coronavirus
- 87 BCO Free-Cycle: Give or Trade Items Related to Breast Cancer
- 5.9K Clinical Trials, Research News, Podcasts, and Study Results
- 86 Coping with Holidays, Special Days and Anniversaries
- 828 Employment, Insurance, and Other Financial Issues
- 101 Family and Family Planning Matters
- Family Issues for Those Who Have Breast Cancer
- 26 Furry friends
- 1.8K Humor and Games
- 1.6K Mental Health: Because Cancer Doesn't Just Affect Your Breasts
- 706 Recipe Swap for Healthy Living
- 704 Recommend Your Resources
- 171 Sex & Relationship Matters
- 9 The Political Corner
- 874 Working on Your Fitness
- 4.5K Moving On & Finding Inspiration After Breast Cancer
- 394 Bonded by Breast Cancer
- 3.1K Life After Breast Cancer
- 806 Prayers and Spiritual Support
- 285 Who or What Inspires You?
- 28.7K Not Diagnosed But Concerned
- 1K Benign Breast Conditions
- 2.3K High Risk for Breast Cancer
- 18K Not Diagnosed But Worried
- 7.4K Waiting for Test Results
- 603 Site News and Announcements
- 560 Comments, Suggestions, Feature Requests
- 39 Mod Announcements, Breastcancer.org News, Blog Entries, Podcasts
- 4 Survey, Interview and Participant Requests: Need your Help!
- 61.9K Tests, Treatments & Side Effects
- 586 Alternative Medicine
- 255 Bone Health and Bone Loss
- 11.4K Breast Reconstruction
- 7.9K Chemotherapy - Before, During, and After
- 2.7K Complementary and Holistic Medicine and Treatment
- 775 Diagnosed and Waiting for Test Results
- 7.8K Hormonal Therapy - Before, During, and After
- 50 Immunotherapy - Before, During, and After
- 7.4K Just Diagnosed
- 1.4K Living Without Reconstruction After a Mastectomy
- 5.2K Lymphedema
- 3.6K Managing Side Effects of Breast Cancer and Its Treatment
- 591 Pain
- 3.9K Radiation Therapy - Before, During, and After
- 8.4K Surgery - Before, During, and After
- 109 Welcome to Breastcancer.org
- 98 Acknowledging and honoring our Community
- 11 Info & Resources for New Patients & Members From the Team