June 2012 Mastectomy
Comments
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Lynn27- sorry if I can across to strongly, I know you were venting and just getting out what you feel. I guess I was venting too. I am so frinking tired of worrying about crap. Tired of feeling guilty that I can't do things and am ruining my kids summer. We are a pretty active family and like to do things during the summer but between chemo, surgery and then rads it looks like I will be getting better right when the kids go back to school. Then I find out I can't do reconstruction until 6 months out of rads so that puts me at a 6 week recovery (DIEP) sometime early next year. Then, topper of guilty, I may be BCRA+ (results in about 2 weeks) so I may have some stupid broken gene that I pass on to my kids. I cannot imagine my daughter, or son for that matter, having to go through this.
So anyway, I guess I have been pushing, pretending to be strong so long and hard that I forget it is okay to admit/accept that this stuff is scary and that one of the worries is what we are losing.
7of9- dang girl you are making it look easy
. Glad you are doing so well!
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I haven't posted much in the last couple of weeks. You can add me to the June BMX list: June 18th. I feel like this has all happened so fast since my diagnosis back on May 11th. Plan is for skin and nipple sparing BMX with immediate reconstruction to Sientra TEs. Honestly, I haven't thought about it much in the last two weeks as we had a mini vacation over the Memorial Day weekend. I had plenty of other things to occupy my mind, but I know now there are many things I need to plan and accomplish before June 18th. We are taking the kids to the beach next weekend, so there will be another four days between now and then that I won't be preparing for surgery.
What practical things should I be doing to prepare? How long can I expect to be incapacitated once home from the hospital? I have two young children (5 1/2 & 3) and a husband at home. I was thinking I should have the kids stay with relatives for the first few days after surgery. I don't want them to be scared. What about special clothing to accomodate the TEs & drains? I'd love to hear what you all are doing to prepare.
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Hi everyone...I'm HOME! Wasn't expecting out til Monday but the surgeon doing rounds and the plastics guy said I looked great and could go....you need to be on the pil painkillers a few times before they let you go and honestly they seem to have better coverage/longer than the 2 hour shot I'd get via IV. Give your tummy time, I didn't puke but was a little nauseated and didn't start eating crackers and warm water til late in the day. Promethazine and zofran to the rescue!
Friday was a blur. I popped 2 Ativans (.5mg) and my morning (what there was of it, up at 3:45 and at Cleveland Clinic by 5) went smooth. It was actually a breeze to what I had conjured up in my mind!
Surgeon said via relative (hubby had gone to the cafeteria) that I was all clean. Won't find it all out til post opt appt nxt Monday and I am just so happy the neo chemo and surgery are done I don't care at all now. I did a mile on the treadmill this morning but did push my right arm a little too hard (BMX with? nodes out on left side). Already peaked at scars, nothing too bad. Drains don't hurt at all are just a litte weird.
You can do this!!! Ambien, Attivan and Vicodin await along with the knowledge they are taking out the cancer!!! Who's next? Go girl!
Parden my horrific spelling...blaming the drugs though when my hair comes back, I can say it's a blonde thing too...though looks like an awful lot of gray!
love hugs and great success to the rest of you. I'm cheering for you over here...
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7of9- Again, thank you. I feel sooo much better about everything reading your posts. BTW- my spelling has gone downhill since starting chemo and I got to a point where in the overall score of things good spelling just wasn't that important!
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Count me in also ladies..June 26th is mine..3 days before my 56th birthday..Just finished my last chemo May 25th..Stage IV..no reconstruction at this time and rads to follow surgery..Prayers to all and thank you for all the support!!
Terry
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Hi all - June 11 is my date, right mastectomy for extensive DCIS. I hate this waiting...after dx BS ordered MRI of both breasts due to family history (my mom died of BC when she was 44) and 3 tiny spots showed up in the left breast. Couldn't find the spots to biopsy on US, so have to go for MRI guided biopsy on Tuesday. Looks like I may end up with bi-lateral mastectomy depending on this! I am so glad this site exists, it means alot to know I'm not alone. Funny how surreal it feels to be doing this now, at age 37. I'm not ready! I found it myself, had a clean first mammogram last year (early because of family history), but found a large "bumpy mass" in April. Weird, no real lump, but it didn't feel right. Dr. said it felt like an infection, ordered a diagnostic mammo. The radiologist did an ultrasound, and even gave me the option of waiting since it really just looked like "hormonal changes" - I had miscarried a pregnancy in the 2nd month back in March. My hysterical voice in my head wouldn't have liked that, so I did 5 core biopsies (that radiologist was covering her bases!) Came back DCIS, grade 2. WTF? 4cm worth. How could that be in there and I missed it for so long? What a crazy journey since then, as I'm sure you all know. I'm terrified of having chemo, which is really selfish I know. I don't want to lose my hair, even less than I want to lose my breast! Well, I'm counting down, 8 days left. The more I read, the more confused I get. I'm closing my eyes, taking a deep breath, and letting what will be, be. Eating healthier, quit smoking, nicer to my kids (lol). Maybe I needed this kick in the butt. Best wishes to all of you, keep posting!
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Hi ladies... I'm a June girl also.... June 7 to be exact which is 4 days from today which is coming up too soon and I'm quite nervous lol. It's wonderful to see how some of you really get through it without much difficulty. I hope I can say the same. It's been quite a ride since beginning of April. Mammo showed something, sent for US then biopsy, showed dcis. Surgeon said that was great and we scheduled a lumpectomy. I even went to the pre op appt. In the meanwhile, had an Mri which showed another spot, also dcis or so they said... Lumpectomy changed to right side MX and the second dcis became IDC after a second onc. looked. Supposedly small, between 2.5 and 3 mm. She doesn't expect lymph node involvement but of course, doing the SNB. I am worried about spread. I am also scared of lymphodema. Maybe I wouyldn't worry so much if I had more time but this is ridiculous. You have a funny mammo beginning of April and before you know it your having surgery on 6/7. Ahhh, just venting. Que sera sera....Thanks for listening to my rambling vent lol.
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Welcome to all you! Sorry you had to join us but it's nice to be able to have friends on the same journey.
Tlangston, I'm also June 26. I'm trying to squeeze in a whole summer of activities these first few weeks of June so the kids can feel like they had some kind of summer vacation.
7of9, so glad to hear you are home and doing well.
Prayers and best wishes to all of you. -
loriio-I will be thinking of you and wishing you well..I wish I had the energy to do something..just finished chemo..so my energy level is 0. I am just wanting to get my house cleaned..Have a Beautiful day ladies..make memories!!
Terry
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Hello June friends - I am scheduled for BMX and TE surgery June 29th! I finished chemo May 15th. I didn't think about surgery much during my chemo phase but I'm in full "surgery" mode now - LOL. Trying to get all my ducks in a row at the office and home. This is my first post. Your posts have been informative and I realize my anxiety is normal! My plan is to stay busy right up until I am being wheeled into surgery!
I plan on staying close! -
7of9- I'm so glad to hear you are doing so well!! I'm kinda of jealous your done already all this waiting is the worst..
Tellie savalis- I totaly understand were you are coming from. I have to wait for reconstruction also due to rads. The whole summer thing with the kids is a bummer, I feel bad that we can not do anything because the summer is all bout me. I promised them something fun next summerthey are older so they understand. I feel worse about it than they do.
Can't believe there is 27 of us wishing everybody the best WE CAN DO THIS!! -
Even though I am scheduled for my SNB on June 12th, I will have my big surgery on July 11th. I hope you all don't mind me sticking around a little. Deriving great inspiration and useful advice as I wait my turn to walk (full steam ahead) on the other side of this.
7of9...just down the turnpike from you.........so glad you are doing well........
Peace and warm hugz (gentle ones) to all of my comrades in this....
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7 of 9- so happy to see how well everything went. It is very inspiring and takes away a little of nervousness I have. Maybe it's not as bad as all that.
sandpiper - you just a few days behind me. We ill both do fine. I will be thinking about you.
To all of you young ones with young kids - Cancer really sucks but you can fight it and make it a temporarysetback.
Sending good vibes to all ofyou
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Damn, trying to upload a picture of myself with my arms OVER my head...2 days after surgery...and no, I'm not a yoga master!
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7of9- I hope I'm feeling as well as you are after my BMX surgery on the 18th. It's inspirational!
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7of9 let me tell you that you rock! I am so hoping to recover the same way! I have been running to keep in shape so I hope it goes the same. I am the 11th so right now I am still in the nesting mode! Good for you.
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Hannah,, 25 weeks and everyone Lisa, Sandpiper...the list goes on (there are too many of us here... but there is strength in numbers). The last week before surgery went slow, the last 2 days went fast as in I ran out of time trying to do all the last minute cleaning and shopping....I hope you all get an early surgery time because it goes in a bit of a blur (thanks to 2 Ativan - yes surgeon said ok to take. There were just .5mg? but it's like whoosh and it's over. Promise!
I highly recommend meditating or relaxing to music while waiting to go into surgery. My friend came with and while hubby sat quietly by, she did Reiki on me the last 30 - 45 minutes. I was so relaxed! Keep telling yourselves this surgery is great and you want it because it rids you of the last of your cancer (if you had neo adjunct chemo like me).
They didn't even run an IV on me until I was in the operating room so thankfully I had the ativan in my system along with the relaxing/deep breathing exercising I was trying to do. I ended up cracking jokes with the anesthesiologist (sp?). She introduced herself and I said something about how nice to meet you, I know you are a pretty important person to be here and I thanked some guy nurse and woman nurse too...I justs remember everyone smiling and it wasn't scary at all.
Love and prayers to you all. I'm going for my evening walk now.
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Thank you so much 7of9..my chemo buddy is trying to get her surgery done the same day as mine and I have been telling her about you..truly an inspiration..Prayers to all!!
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7of9, reading your posts has made me so much calmer. I am by nature an anxiety ridden person. Now that I am 4 days (less) away from SNB and UMX I am trying really hard to keep my thoughts positive and hope for the best. Reading about howgreat things went for you and more so, how you handled it, has inspired me. I won't worry about what I can't control. If you speak to me the night before surg (Wed. nite), I'll probably be a basket case but for now, I'm looking to you wonderful women who are fighting this disease with style and grace and it's an example for me.
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ami ....you have a similar dx to me. are you in need of chemo? i was told i don't need it and i have 8cm of dcis. possibly a small cancer less than 1cm on the same side and even then they said to me no chemo no rads. i have a dmx with immediate diep on june 18th. im at juravinski in hamilton ontario and they are a university training place as well...mcmaster university is a medical school and my case was put to a panel of oncologists to review recommendations for my treatment because im only 33 and dx was not seen by ultrasound or mammo but by mri.
25weeks.....we are on the same day. are you recon with implants or diep/tram? i am worried about my kids summer too. was planning on taking them to lots of pow wows to dance this summer and that is changed now until late summer anyways. we can wait together!
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7of9....lol. im happy for you and can't WAIT to join you on the completed side of things. is a cami with pockets for drains of any benefit? what's been the most useful thing you packed?
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I don't know if the cami with pockets for drains will be of any benefit but I did buy two from two different companies. They look comfortable and they have a pocket to put a fake boob into (is that called foob? - still learning the abbreviations on this site).... I bought extra large sized pajamas with buttons and a couple of button down shirts in large sizes... I bought a stress ball to exercise the arm to hopefully avoid lymphedema. I also bought a bunch of pillows in different sizes like a wedge pillow because I understand you can't lie flat with drains, a small pillow for the affected arm (having SND) and pillows to have while on the recliner, etc. I may have overdone it. My sister said I did but I wanted to be prepared. It took away from my massive anxiety to get these things. I also got hand sanitizer, deoderant without aluminum for whenever, pads in case of leakage of any kind.... Yeah, maybe I did overdo lol.... If anyone knows of anything I might really need right after surgery, please let me know. I appreciate it.
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7of9 - wow! you amaze and inspire me! Thank you so much for sharing your story - it provides more hope than these little words can type. You are a wonder woman!!
Bevg - your list is very helpful!! BTW, what does a wedge pillow look like? I went to Bed Bath & Beyond and found one of those pillows you use to prop behind you to read - is that a wedge pillow?? I've heard from many people that they help but I'm clueless on what they look like so I just keep buying every type of pillow I see :-) I also bought 2 down Euro pillows - hoping they'll help to prop me up too. I think I need to buy a couple more button up large shirts. I've also heard that having plenty of laxitives is also important - so I bought a jumbo size bottle of SentkotS (with stool softener) - sorry girls but apparently all the meds cause a little 'back up' in our system. I also made a couple of appointments w/my hair dresser for a nice wash & blow out ... you gals who have already done chemo win out on this one :-)
1 week & counting for me ... June 11th can't get here fast enough ... ugh ... I'm shaking as I type this one. Waiting simply sucks!
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wedge pillow is one of those pillows at an angle that you can put up against headboard and sit up. They come at different angles. I think we need them for drains because you can't lay down and drain. I think anyway. I went to the hair dresser the other day and got the shortest cut I've ever had. My son says it makes me look old but whatever. I need convenience I think after this surgery in 3 days.. I'm going out today for a couple more big button down shirts plus button down pj's in big size...... The camisole I got was made by Softee... It's the Softee II with the pockets and inserts for fake boobs. It's so stretchy you can put it on feet first then it goes back into shape.. Also got a camisole by Gentle Touch. That one has velcro in the front, easy for doctor appts. Oh, and I def. stocked up on colace and will get laxitives too, not only softeners. Ugghghghhg, 3 days .... It can't come fast enough and yet, I wish it wasn't coming so fast at all....
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NanG, I bought 2 front velcro shirts from Heal in Comfort and though I didn't really use the pockets for the drains (the nurse pinned them to the bra they provided actually keeps them and the tubes higher and out of the way). But the front velcro and soft material is very handy. Also I put one on the morning after surger and it's so nice to put on some color (mine are pink and blue) rather than those ratty ugly hospital gowns. Also put my "hair" on and a smidge of makeup...really felt better. Oh and the shirst came with a canvas necklace thing that has a velcro loop to put the drains through when showering to keep them from dangling. This was very helpful when I took my first shower last night. Ahhhh
I thought I'd be utterly depressed and spooked by the drains but they are fine. Annoying, but how awful it would be to let the fluid build up inside without them and have to deal with all that pressure on the inside.
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7 of 9: Congratulations on CLEAN! Now you can move forward. I'm following in your footsteps on Friday.
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Lynn...looks like you are having similar recon to me. are you having chemo or rads? i have dcis too and am having dmx on june 18. immediate diep. i will be praying for you too!!! let me know how you are doing girl.
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NanG: if the nodes are clean, then I'm done: no chemo or rads. If they aren't clean, plan B (whatever that may be). Thank you for the prayers. I'll post my results once I'm out of ICU.
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Congrats 7of9! So glad to hear you are doing well. I just got my pre-op clearance this morning, although my WBC counts were still low when the drew blood on 5/29. Chemo just keeps on giving... I have a follow up with my MO on Wed and that point will almost be 4 weeks post chemo. Really hoping everything is back to normal.
My3sunz - yes! this will be the only time i'm happy that i don't have hair. I definitely recommend something with senna, sennekot is good but I liked something called Smooth Moove a little better. you can get it at Whole Foods or a health store like that.
good luck everyone!
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@ldianel, due to the difference in time zone I doubt you will see this before your surgery, but I prayed for you anyway, that your surgery will be successful, that being sent home so quickly afterwards won't cause any problems for you or your husband & son, and that the home nurses will be gentle and helpful and just what you need.
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