suicidal thoughts on tamoxifen?

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CrazyKitties
CrazyKitties Member Posts: 180

Am I the only person on effexor and tamoxifen who wants to kill themselves?

Comments

  • voraciousreader
    voraciousreader Member Posts: 7,496
    edited April 2012

    Please contact your doctor ASAP. You don't need to feel this way.

  • cp418
    cp418 Member Posts: 7,079
    edited April 2012

    Sometimes I wonder for those of us with high hormone levels when add Tamoxifen - - -  very hard to deal with sleep deprevation, extreme mood swings, feelings of extreme PMS, depression and worse.  Some women tolerate it well and some do not - - the sleep deprivation was the worse for me.  You must speak to your doctor immediately and do not be put off by a nurse as messenger!!

  • Journey
    Journey Member Posts: 905
    edited April 2012

    Please call you doctor! I had the same problem after being in Tamoxifen for about 7 months. It was gradual and really snuck up on me. I suddenly realized that what I was feeling and yes even planning was horrible and NoT me! I stopped taking it immediately and scheduled an appointment with my oncologist ASAP. It IS a side effect!!! I was back to normal in short time but had o forgo Tamoxifen.

  • 1Athena1
    1Athena1 Member Posts: 6,696
    edited April 2012

    Crazykitties - no you are not. Please get help. Tamoxifen can kill. That drug is not for everyone. Especially if there is a pre existing major mood disorder. YOUR SAFETY COMES FIRST. Things can escalate in a heartbeat. Best to you.

  • msphil
    msphil Member Posts: 1,536
    edited April 2012

    yes sweetie, get some help I didn,t have that side effect, I did pretty good on it, had weight gain, insomnia, muscle aches, but nothing like that,all of us are different and not same effect. God bless. msphil

  • Linda-n3
    Linda-n3 Member Posts: 2,439
    edited April 2012

    Crazykitties, CALL YOUR DOC NOW!!!!! Don't wait until tomorrow if you are feeling this bad now!



    Tamoxifen made me really crazy the first time I used it, I went off, then went back on when I had recurrence. Still lots of SEs, and the meds used to treat the SEs from tamoxifen and for chemo-induced neuropathy can also cause suicidal and homicidal thoughts. The meds often used to treat the hot flashes from tamoxifen can also cause these thoughts. I agree with everyone else who has posted here: tamoxifen is not for everyone, and it can kill. (And there may be other causes for your feeling this way right now, but self-diagnosis is not a good idea - get a caring professional). PLEASE let us know how you are doing! Do you have someone you can talk with RIGHT NOW, TONIGHT??

  • mybee333
    mybee333 Member Posts: 1,189
    edited April 2012

    I read this with interest as I have been having suicidal thoughts.  On Easter Sunday I decided to stop my Effexor because I have gained a pound a month while on it.  It is hard to say what causes what.  I felt better for about a week or two but am back feeling seriously depressed.  I have been taking Aromasin for about one month.  Prev. took Arimidex with several attempts but got severe headaches.Frankly I felt pretty good without an anti-hormonal and was hesitant to try again, but know I have to take it.  I had a full hysterectomy 4 yrs ago.  But it could be many stressors: kids growing up, bad break up, declining income and increasing expenses and severe arthritis that has come upon me this past year.  I am 20 lbs. over my weight of 3 yrs ago, but after 4 surgeries,etc. I just wish I could work out but the severe pain I have prevents me.  Now with Arimidex, everything is starting to ache on me (I have fibromyalgia). I live with two teens - my oldest who is disabled, lives with his Dad.  I was diagnosed about a year ago - could be an anniversary reaction too.  All I know is that I am depressed to the point it is hard to get to work and I have pushed away any friends I have left, altho' some family and friends have just not been up to it.  The only person I confide in is my counselor at the cancer center; I am afraid that if I say I am suicidal they will hospitalize me or put me on an anti-depressant that will add to the weight gain. I am repeating reconstruction in June but am considering having the other breast removed to prevent recurrence; that may be the source of the current sadness, (in fact I have several surgeries/procedures coming up).

    I never thought the anti-hormonal could be leading to the depressive/suicidal feelings.

  • peggy_j
    peggy_j Member Posts: 1,700
    edited April 2012

    I agree. Please call someone now. If your doctor isn't available or not the person you want to call, there is probably a suicide hotline in your phone book.  I googled "suicide hotline" and found this

    www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org/ 

    National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 1-800-273-TALK (8255) 

    We care about your CrazyKitties. Please write back and let us know how you are feeling. (((hugs))) 

  • Moderators
    Moderators Member Posts: 25,912
    edited April 2012

    CrazyKitties, we'll add to the excellent advice you've already received, and encourage you to contact your doctor right away. Depression and mood swings are known side effects of tamoxifen, but you shouldn't have to feel this way.

    Please, please call your doctor. 

    If you're having these feelings now and need someone to talk with, contact the National Suicide Prevention Hotline at 800-273-TALK (800-273-8255), or your local 911, or go to your hospital emergency room for help.

    Your Mods

  • CrazyKitties
    CrazyKitties Member Posts: 180
    edited April 2012

    My onco told me almost 2 years ago that my feelings were not part of the tamoxifen. Hysterically enough, I am actually a really smart woman who doesn't take shit from anyone. I have had these issues since Aug. of 2010. 3 weeks ago  I took a gun out and loaded it. mind you, I am the silliest, smart-assiest, full of hope for life person you will ever meet. I stopped taking it 3 weeks ago to give myself a break. I was starting to feel a little better and then got scared that I was depriving my 10 year old daughter of a mom in her 20's unless I took this stuff. I don't have a mood disorder as much as I have had depression, anxiety, PTSD 4 times, and have ADHD. I am also really loving, funny as shit, talented, swear like a freaking old bitch sailor, and would like to kill the next person who tells me I should not be having these side effects. Screw it. My onco will not back down from this. Therefore, i will find another doctor. Life is too short for this shit. Thank you fellow bc ladies for caring about me tonight. xoxoxxoI am walking Relay for Life this friday and plan on forging forward and honoring others whose journey has been much worse than mine.

  • CrazyKitties
    CrazyKitties Member Posts: 180
    edited April 2012

    Oh yeah, I have fibro and was diagnosed with lyme disease last year. looking back on this ordeal, do you know that 9 days after my mastectomy with beginning reconstruction, I had a dinner party at my house for my friends who helped me thru this stuff? That is how quickly i come back from adversity. FUCK TAMOXIFEN, at least for me. I wish I wasn't so sensitive, but oh well! xoxox

  • mybee333
    mybee333 Member Posts: 1,189
    edited April 2012

    Good for you.  I am planning on walking soon for Relay too. I always thought I was a toughie.......Waiting to bounce back in a significant way.

    You think the fibro. complicates our pictures, as far as SE"s?

  • mybee333
    mybee333 Member Posts: 1,189
    edited April 2012

    CK - You sound quite tough.  I think it was a bit easier to be strong in the beginning, at least for me.  I was still in shock. You sound like you have some good friends to have a dinner party with, so that is good.  Hang in there sister!!

  • Journey
    Journey Member Posts: 905
    edited April 2012

    Life IS too short and what good is a drug if it staves off cancer but makes you follow thru on trying to kill yourself? Glad you will find another doctor. Oh, and if I remember correctly suicidal thoughts is listed in the mice type of Tamox literature as a side effect. might want to highlight that and send it to your old doctor. Hang tough and it will get better. Bless your heart for being so young and dealing with this crap!

  • CrazyKitties
    CrazyKitties Member Posts: 180
    edited April 2012

    I am starting to think that 150 mg. of effexor may be contributing to this. I am going to wean down to 75mg and let you ladies know how that goes. Antidepressants can make people suicidal, not all of them, but some. I was on lexapro before and never felt like this!!

  • CrazyKitties
    CrazyKitties Member Posts: 180
    edited April 2012

    Mybee333- heck yes, fibro is a bitch!!! I am really sensitive now to all types of things, so why not meds?

  • peggy_j
    peggy_j Member Posts: 1,700
    edited April 2012

    CrazyKitties, thanks for checking in. Wow, you're going through a lot and I can see why you might feel discouraged. It's not the same, but when I began tamox I went through a period of severe insomnia for about 6 weeks--I mean, practically no sleep, night after night for weeks. It sucked and my mood dropped. I felt really discouraged. Finally a friend suggested I might be depressed and so I called a counselor and she helped a lot. As you probably know, she said that depression can be serious, so I'm glad you're getting help with that. I can't imagine dealing with all those other things; it makes it complicated and discouraging to say the least. Are there any support services you can use? I don't like full-on support groups (I'm afraid to hear about new issues I haven't considered before) but I've been going to my Healing Imagery group and it helps. It's all cancer patients so I feel like I'm around my tribe. And the imagery is a type of meditation. It helps. Glad to hear you're seeking a second opinion and moving forward. take care!

  • 1Athena1
    1Athena1 Member Posts: 6,696
    edited April 2012

    crazykitties - let us know how it goes with the lower dose of Effexor. I am curious - you say you were on Lexapro. Why did you go off it?

  • CrazyKitties
    CrazyKitties Member Posts: 180
    edited April 2012

    You guys are so great, thank you! My husband is zero help. I went off lexapro and on effexor because I was pput on lupron and femara for about 6 months. My hot flashes could bake pizza. Effexor is amazing for hot flashes, I am not kidding. Started at 75 mg but went up t0 150 for Hell flashes. I have not slept properly for 11 years. That is part of my fibro. the first and last time I took Ambien I walked out of my house in a slightly questionable neighborhood and walked around.Anyway, I know alot about fibro. Meds start to work for awhile and then they turn on you. Also, I have never done well on a high dose of antidepressant---I actually get depressed! Effexor has a half life of 24 hours, so in 4 days I will be at a regular dose of 75 mg, which is doable. Today I really noticed the beautiful greens on leaves in the sunlight, felt amazed by the light and the birds chirping, and realized that I will be ok. But I owe all of you reaching out to me for that. I cannot talk to my family. I have 2 friends who are here to talk but I cannot dump on them in good conscience. My marraige is a huge stressor and I need to deal with it. Love to you all....xoxoxoxo

  • 1Athena1
    1Athena1 Member Posts: 6,696
    edited April 2012

    I am glad you are reaching out to us. Hope your Effexor levels "level" out.

  • Linda-n3
    Linda-n3 Member Posts: 2,439
    edited April 2012

    crazykitties, so glad you are here, glad to see so many of us doing what we can to support you across the miles. I was on Effexor for chemo-induced neuropathy, the MO said other benefits would be improvement of Tamox SEs: hot flashes and depression. Made the depression much worse, no help for hot flashes, definitely got suicidal thoughts. Talked to the MO to discontinue, but it was too quick for me and on top of everything else I got severe withdrawal symptoms (jittery, nausea, headache, etc.). Just telling you this to make sure you pay attention to this as you decrease your Effexor. Hope the lower dose helps you! Took me 3 weeks after I had only been on it 6-8 weeks before discontinuing. But I am off that and almost all other meds and feeling much better! Still going to see my counselor and participating in a cancer support group. I had resisted a face-to-face group until this one was offered as an 8-week session of mindfulness-based sessions for cancer survivors, and it is a group of about 8 women that I am finding somewhat helpful.

  • CrazyKitties
    CrazyKitties Member Posts: 180
    edited April 2012

    Well guess what? The effexor (too high a dose) caused the major depression! That is really scary. I could barely get out of bed. I woke up at 5 am today, out of the bed at 6, and I am actually happy and starting to bounce around like the spaz I am! I start summer school in may(late bloomer, getting a degree in theatre!) and now I feel like I can do this! Please share this info with others, that there is a fine line with antidepressants---they can make you suicidal!!! Love and light to you all....xoxoxo

  • LFree
    LFree Member Posts: 3
    edited July 2012

    I went on effexor to control hot flashes (I was on Celexa before).  I hated how it made me feel, and it did nothing to help my hot flashes.  However, it was a b***h to get off of it.  I had the worst withdrawal effects I have ever had in my life, I wanted to commit myself.  Now I'm off all anti-depressants after being on them for ten years.  Add to that Tamoxifen which also causes depression.  I have felt suicidal the last 3 days with some crazy family issues involved as well.  I have been taking 5 htp, but it's not cutting the mustard.  How can I get off all this stuff, and feel better mentally.  It seems crazy to go through all of this (malignant melanoma followed by stage 3 bc) only to feel like ending it all.  I'm having such a tough time 6 months after treatment.  Did you all feel worse as time went on?  How do I try to tell my family what I'm feeling.

    Les 

  • Byhisstripes419
    Byhisstripes419 Member Posts: 9
    edited January 2017

    It's w anyone still participating in this forum? I'm having a tough time, and from reading this, it may be, in part, the Tamoxifin. My oncologist is as empathetic as a stone, and I hate to even contact him. Calling him is a even worse stressor. My husband is very loving, but has no clue what I'm feeling and that our financial situation, he's no longer working, adds greatly to my worries. His solution is to change my focus, but life's issues: bills, money, work situations, weight gain, hair loss, pain, and obstacles are in front of me 24/7. He says I should get an antidepressant that works with Tamoxifin besides effexor, but I'm sick of popping pills, being sick, and fearing cancer will return. Besides that, I really can't afford extra doctor visits or missed time from work either. I usually bounce back from adversity, but this time feels much different. I didn't even feel THIS hopeless when initially diagnosed.

  • KBeee
    KBeee Member Posts: 5,109
    edited January 2017

    Please, please call your MO first thing in the morning. Tamoxifen can cause depression and suicidal thoughts in severe cases. Call right away. PM me if you need to talk. This is the meducation. Not you. There are options to help you. Please post soon so we know you're ok. Holding you close in my thoughts

  • mybee333
    mybee333 Member Posts: 1,189
    edited January 2017

    Hi. I haven't visited this site for a long time. By His stripes - you've a lot going on right now, but you can be brave and push through it. I would've never thought I could get through all I have but I'm happier now; it just took a while and some sticking with it (I mean years). Consider getting a new oncologist. Breast cancer is so common now that most can pick right up where the other left off. I changed a couple of times, mostly because of logistics, another time to get into a better health system and found one that I can work with if my cancer should ever, God forbid, return. I found I far preferred female physicians. They also seemed to have the nicest staff. Don't hesitate to find outside support. It sounds like your husband has so much going on himself. My family couldn't handle all of my issues. But there was a counselor I liked at the cancer center, a perk for a place I was followed by for a while. Those in-house providers I've found are best because they know cancer and all of its entanglements and troubles. Outside therapists may seem they know but they don't and their own fears may come through (and I'm a therapist myself!) in strange ways. This is all so tricky. Anti-depressants dont seem to work for me. Cymbalta did make me feel happier but the feeling was short-lived. I was taking it for pain anyway and it didn't help with that. It was VERY hard to get off of. Everyone is different as far as their response to anti-depressants and yet - yours could be causing suicidal thoughts and depression so youll need to work witih your doc on that one. Oh and that fear of recurrence? It did go away for me and is no longer in my daily thoughts but it took years to fade. I'm finally 5 1/2 years out. Please let us know how you're doing. Peace.

  • Byhisstripes419
    Byhisstripes419 Member Posts: 9
    edited January 2017

    I'm ok. Thank so much for your responses. I haven't called my onc, but I stopped taking the Tamoxifin and feel a little better. The down side is that I now feel like I'm playing Russian roulette with my life since both my biological mother and her sister have been diagnosed in the past. I'm embarrassed for feeling such strong mental side effects, and it's difficult to talk even to a doctor. My current onc has caused me feel as if I shouldn't be experiencing the things I've told him about in the past, like I'm faking or over reacting. That's the entire reason I searched and found this site. I needed to know that wasn't crazy. I'm going to see if can get another doctor in the office. Hopefully, it will help to get one with whom I'm comfortable. Please say prayer for me, ladies! Thanks again for your help.

  • radgal
    radgal Member Posts: 100
    edited January 2017

    Dear CrazyKitties,

    Proud of you gal!! Thank you for all your posts here. Really needed to read this.

  • Vix1970
    Vix1970 Member Posts: 12
    edited January 2017

    I was the same I lasted just 20 days on tamoxifen before I had to stop it. I became suicidal was so depressed and anxiety ridden I could not function and my brain fog was so bad I was a danger to myself. Been off it 2 weeks and I am back to myself again thank god. I would never work in my field again on it I'm only 46 years old.

    Like you I feel like I am playing Russian roulette with my life and my oncologist is not helpful in the least just today he said I want you to try it again in s couple of months I cried I'm so scared.i did not do chemo because he said anti hormones would be more beneficial now I'm just so confused. He will not offer any alternative as he says they are far worse for SE.

    Vix

  • KBeee
    KBeee Member Posts: 5,109
    edited January 2017

    Vix, find a new MO. I have s couple friends who had to go off Tamoxifen because they became suicidal. It is not your fault, not in your head, and nothing to be embarrassed about. I tolerate Letroxole better than Tamoxifen. Everyone tolerates drugs differently. There are alternatives. See another MO who will be more empathetic and supportive

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