Bonfire of the Goddesses
Comments
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You are going through post traumatic stress...I have too - was much better at the beginning...need to get out and if possible try not to talk about it too much...that has helped me....I wish you well and am throwing all my negative post traumatic stress feelings into the fire with your....so in my goes also and the fire is flaming very high and nicely....also I am tired of talking about the BC with everyone I meet that knows about it...it is so depressing...just want to talk about something else with these people...we have these boards for help...so I am throwing that into the fire too...all the depressing BC talk from people who do not know what the hell I am going through...only us gals know!!!!!! (((hugs and prayers to us all)))
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Groovy, party! Dancing, head scarfs, peasant dresses, earrings, and don't forget the beaded choker and flowers in your hair. No booze, no drugs, just fun. Come on MadP get your groove on and soon the sun will shine in. I had to make myself get out too, went shopping for nothing in particular, pulled out my crafts I had neglected, and finished a book that I had started before BC. Have a girls night out with a good friend and plan for another each month. I really look forward to it now. I get to wear something special that I don't wear everyday, even my peasant skirt! Party on girls. Kitty
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Oh noooooooo, a party without my Vodka..........................that can't be...........Jo, Granny, Sheila, LADIES...........................help................................................
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ducky - HERE! HERE! It can't be a party without the vodka. I will help you go find the vodka bottle LOL!!
dancetrancer - It has been extremely difficult finding information on the internet about recon surgery after a lumpectomy. I think I am beyond fat grafting - too much to repair. Right now, my best option is the LD flap which I want to get it done now and get it over with. I have to be patient.
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Jo: know how you feel about lopsided breasts. I threw my 1st BS on the fire that did lumpectory 2 1/2 years ago and missed the cancer. She took out 8cm x 6cm of tissue. Move forward to this past December and 2nd BS took out the cancer and about the same size of tissue. I'm a DD in non cancer breast and a C in the cancer breast. None of my bras fit right and I'm stuck wearing sports bras. Anybody know of web sites for bras that cater to woman with lopsided breasts? Not sure if I'm a candidate for reconstruction. Guess I have to ask BS and insurance company.
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kingjr66 - You are a candidate for reconstructive surgery and your insurance should pay for it. I can't remember where I ran across it but there are federal laws saying you have the right to this procedure and can not be denied by your insurance carrier. I did not think I was a candidate and had my BS refer me to a PS and am now getting a surgical clearance from my family doctor and a mammogram done before I schedule the date. Check with your insurance to be sure and at least consult with a PS. Please keep me posted - I would be interested in hearing what you find out.
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Jo: I heard this before - either from you or elsewhere - so kingjr66 - it is worth your time to investigate. I had 6 cm removed for a 1.7 cm tumor. In my case, I now have a seroma that is bigger than my original tumor! My "bad" side is now bigger than my "good" side, and this was always my smaller side. Already had a scare on a follow up mammo because they wanted to evaluate the seroma. Yep, it's there. Surprise! Yes, some days it is a PIA, but mostly I don't notice it. I'm lopsided, but no worse than I was pre-BC - just in a different way.
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Jo- I have had the same experience as you and I too am an A and B cup. I can wear padded bras to look the same, but the bra's don't fit right and hurt. I take the dam thing off once I am home. I am looking for a ps that does the fat grafting a little at a time with needle withdrawls, not the major liposuction thing. I have found sites on this, but of course it's not where I live.
Barbicorn- I know what you mean about people. I have a friend who will come up to me in a store and instead of asking me how I am, she will say, How are your breast. I just want to slap her.
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Dianarose, Alas, I have too much gone to do fat grafting according to my PS. . I will need the extra piece of skin that comes with the LD flap - that is how lopsided I am. Once I am home from work, the bra and makeup comes off even before dinner gets cooked. Hope you are able to find someone to do the fat grafting for you.
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Dianarose - If you lived in NJ - I'd slap her for you....lol....some people have no sense,none!!!
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Jo: I can have this done even after the rads? My onco told me that it's harder for PS to reconstruct after rads unless this was her ploy to get me to do the chemo, which I refused.
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kingjr66 - Of course you can. I think you have to wait at least 6 months to allow the skin & breast to settle into its new normal. I am 15 months out from rads and my PS said my skin looked great. Did not hesitate to say he could fix me. If you need to, get your BS or MO to refer you to a PS and ask a lot of questions. See what he/she recommends doing and then get on the internet and do all the research you can. If you have specific questions or concerns - you are more than welcome to send me a PM anytime.
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Jo: what I actually would like is to have the healthy breast downsized. Tire of the "big ones". wouldn't mind being a C again. Always do my research, especially if I'm going to need a PS. Too many horor stories on the web - too bad we all can't have a Dr. Troy or Dr. McNamara (Nip/Tuck). Thanks for your posts
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The surgeon who did not do an MRI or CT scan and missed my cancer on lateral side will always be on my list. The fact I have noto been told about recon for partial breast loss, that irks me too. Thank you for all the info here.
Onto the fire today are all my lists that never get done.
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kingjr66 - You can have that done at the same time you get the BC boob fixed. That way most insurance carriers will pay for it. Then you get what you want. Sounds like you need to at least get a referral for a consult with a PS. What have you got to lose?
Essa - I was livid when I found out I could have recon done. Most likely I would have had to wait unti now to get it done. Had to have a hysteroscopy/D&C done last summer - due to Tamoxifen and then the winter months are crazy busy for me. Guess this is just my time to get this done.
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off topic....short and sweet.A sista is missing from the fuzzy room.some of you go there and some dont.This is very upsetting to me.like poof she is gone and no one has either a phone number or email address.One person knows her on fb but she is still missing.
so here is my plan...we need a buddy system....i know most of you have at least 1 or 2 phone numbers or emails etc.BUT we have newbees who dont....
Please if you do not have at least 1 buddy find one and please do it quick.Or speak up and lets really be sistas takin care of sistas.please pass this along to anyone you know.
send a pm with your number or email and or ask for theirs.
If this offends anyone then they can keep the status quo.
with much love K
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where's everyone been? nothing posted in a couple days......guess everyone has been having good days for a change. Nothing for me to throw in right now, catch me in a few days. Rads will be over and probably want them tatoos in there and some lotions and sports bras, the nasty sunburn too.
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kingjr66 - Been a very busy week for me. I try to at least read everyday - not a lot of time to post lately.
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Jo- I know you will take them to task until they get it right------into the fire all BS/ PS that do poor work and then congratulate themselves------cluck'em
To our new friends---dancegirl, madpeacock, kingr, dianarose,Jenna---sorry if I've forgotten any one. Tonight a sweet fire for all of you that have joined us. The fire will burn bright because we are joined. We care about one another and what bothers us, we believe in each other, we help solve and salve, we love. So, sweet fire burn, make us warm and heal, bring us closer together.
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Granny dukes, we can make it simpler ----honest. We ask the Mods to create a registry site that if we dodn't hear from someone we have a contact point. It's like ICE in your cell phone. I think the mods would go along with it. It's more safe than depending on one other person. There are details to work out , but I will start the dialogue with the mods tonight. There may be a mechanism already set up and we are just not aware. Lovey ----duck. hang in there babe
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Ducky vodka always------drink it with water causes less dehydration by the vodka
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to all here and that go to FUZZY"S ROMP ROOM, this is the message below that I sent to the Mods. The Mods do and extreme good at taking care of us. Believe that they will figure this out and help us with a solution.------------L&H&P's sheila
Hello, Judith , Melissa ET AL
Please, I'm sure this question has come up before and their may be an existing solution , but since we aren't aware of it we need your help and guidance. Fuzzy Lemons MIA. Unexpected. It's her romp room. Her Fowler's are distressed especially Granny Dukes.
Do we have and existing way of contacting members who have gone MIA unless they have made a secondary contact--i.e. Fuzzy would contact Ducky who would spread the word.
Would you consider a registry that allowed people to check in on people that registered that had a phrase. i.e--------off a while sabbatical. off for surgery, off for vacation., off to be sane------etc.
The problem as I know all of you are to well aware of is, the dilemma of a member disappearing .
We are or have in the back of our mind death b/c of this BC. To have someone disappear without tracking, that we have brought into our lives. Is too much,. So, please if you have a suggestion , it would be great-fully appreciated, Please send your response to Jo and Granny Dukes at Bonfire of the Goddesses. I suggest those names b/c they are most active and can get word to otherts, Bless you all
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tHIS WAS THE REPONSE FROM THE MODS-------BLESS THEM
wrote the Mods about Fuzzy being absent-----they have a system ---------we have to learn it. Our Mods are wonderful. They will modify the system to however it takes to help us.
Mods response:
We find that many members have a sort of buddy system in place where they'll exchange real-life email addresses and/or phone numbers with one or more members in the areas where they're usually active. Also, they'll leave log-in information with a trusted family member or close friend, with instructions to let their pals on BCO know if they're MIA.
One of our long-time members, nowheregirl (formerly Timtam), also runs a Central Address Book for members at every stage. You can read all about it and get info on how to be listed, here:
http://community.breastcancer.org/forum/8/topic/709156
We hope this helps!
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sas - Great idea and thanks to the Mods for responding so quickly. I do have several buddies that have my cell number and email address and I also have theirs. We do need a way to keep track of each other in real time.
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Sas & moderators - thanks!
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I tried the link and i got as far as putting my name in....but it would not take any password that i put in and then it closed....
what did i do wrong?
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ONTO THE FIRE - the nightmare I haad three nights ago that was so real and I am still not over.
The car dealership that treated my daughter poorly today.
The LE swelling and totally numb back of my arm, but thank goodness I can use my hand again.
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You GO, Essa!
I'm chucking in this entire week - I'm done with it! Too much negativity.
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OK, Chabba, Grannydukes, and anyone else here who is MIA from the E-lab thread: we need you back!!!! Meece and I are the only 2 on our team Flock, and the other teams are beating the daylights out of us!!!!!
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madpeacock - I'm with you.....what a terrible week for me too, too much stress. HooRay for St Paddy's day tomorrow........PARTY TIME!!!
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