Just asking....anyone else more jealous now?

jenny: after chemo, my hair just never came back right.. its the added indignity that i sooo didn't need!!! i need to find somewhere where they'll teach me how to wear a wig right.. i have lots of hair, length.. nothing..nada in the top..

  no boobs, no har, and no mojp.. so NOT a good combination..

  actually, the thought of sex is exciting to me.. i do have the urge, so much more than mur, with his diabetes.. now, the reality, is another thing, altogether...3jays

My sister has to hide the ky warming jel as my nephew likes to warm himself up after bath. He uses it like lotion. Very expensive lotion.

That k-y is expensive!!!  DH came home with a tiny bottle. I mean this little tiny thing!! 3o bucks. I mean it was ok, but, lets just say, I think I might want my money back!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am sure there is a no return policy on that one..................he he he!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am not married but have been with the same man for almost 30 years (I'm soon to be 58).  I also hate what this has done to me and I too had a mastectomy.  Same jealousies as described by others here.  Tumor was small but extremely aggressive with a lot of node involvement.  BF is much older than me.  I cannot exactly remember how I put it one day but it was about being angry and how I hated that this disease took so much from me.  His answer was something like he had always worried b/c I was so much younger than him and b/c of that afraid I'd leave.  He looked at me and kinda said, "don't worry, look at it this way, now we are both falling apart together my dear".   Not necessarily the compliment I may have preferred but I somehow felt comfort in that.  Funny how your perspective of all things changes!

Thought I would bump up this topic since I have been thinking about it lately. For some reason, jealousy has really been invading my thoughts lately.  I feel cheated out of my sexuality...I know, you are what you make it, but with a super-low sex drive, lopsided chest, and aches & pains from tamoxifen...add to that a busy job and two young kids: I feel tired, unattractive and jealous of women with wonderful breasts.

I just turned 40. I know we don't get years and years of a great sex drive. But a few more years would have been nice.

If as an " oldster" I can join this discussion.In my early days in tx, I looked like Unce Fester, truly, bloated, bald, grey bags under red rimmed eyes, no fingernails or toenail.Scary UGLY.  Since  I was scared as Sh*t too , sex was probably the furthest thing from my mind. I had done some modeling before BC and my  appearance change was drastic. When I moved back home after my surgeries and Chemo, my blond curly tresses were replaced by grey road kill, tube tire appearannce around my waist (what waist)no eyebrows or lashes for ages, and my nails were shot.   Anyway, I was trying to exercise by walking , and saw in the distance my DH's assistant,lovely Beautiful girl, beautiful hair, shape, etc . walking in the sunshine. I was struck by how jealous I felt.

2 years later she was dxed, by an advanced, aggressive Type of BC. She also had to move away for Tx( much further away ) and she had 2 small children.

That really put things in perspective for me.

I have come to accept that  the woman I was before is gone, and she has been replaced by a smarter, kinder and stronger person. I'm ok with that because I value these changes.

Oh yeah, regarding the MoJO. It does come back. Albeit gradually, but little by little the ravages of this disease and the impact of our body image will get better. Tell your self Daily you are beautiful. You all really are!

Much love

Jenny,

You are so much more than your hair and your chest, and we never know what the hot gal in the gym's story is. Perhaps she's neurotic and has never been able to settle down with one guy? I have more than one smart and georgeous friend who can't pick the good guy from a line-up if their lives depended on it. AND, I'm willing to bet that most men don't know that most of us women just want a great foot or back massage and we are putty in their hands. AND, most of my 40 something girlfriends are getting a little on the heavy side (I'm still close to maintaining). Life is truly a tough journey for us Big C gals, but we have so much to offer. So the next time a man looks at you, instead of thinking "damaged goods", think "sorry you missed this, Buddy!". You are a strong, beautiful survivor, and it will get better!

Love

Bobbie