Have any of you found love after your diagnosis and treatment?

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  • sweetbean
    sweetbean Member Posts: 1,931
    edited February 2012

    Chil, AWESOME!!!!  Good for you!

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  • Dragonfly1976
    Dragonfly1976 Member Posts: 1,637
    edited February 2012

    That's so awesome, I wonder what he thinks when he sees the videos you sent him. I used to have my ex husbands ringtone set as "Loser" by Beck so many good song choices!

     No new news for me, just day by day... Still trying to eat good, and walk, day before I did 4 miles! You guys will get a great laugh out of this story. I was walking on Sunday, and it was so nice and sunny out. I was about 2 miles into my walk and decided to take my sweatshirt off and tie it around my waist. I took my phone and went to put it in my pants pocket (yoga pants) and couldn't find my pocket? I thought what in the world I know they have pockets, then I thought oh crap I must of put them on backwards. So I reach around the back and no pockets still.... Wth? Then I look down, and I see that nope, not on backwards but INSIDE OUT!! HA HA Oops :)

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  • Dragonfly1976
    Dragonfly1976 Member Posts: 1,637
    edited February 2012

    Thanks Hadley, about the profile pic :)

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  • lovemyfamilysomuch
    lovemyfamilysomuch Member Posts: 1,585
    edited February 2012

    sweetbean hang is there with the healing.  It does sound stressfuluy. Dragon fly, put your pants on straight girl!

    Match date last night--I am still shaking--First thing he says to me--"Maybe I should have told you I am having $75,000 worth of dental work being done and I don't have any teeth at the moment.  I almost barfed. I am a very kind person, but I was really repulsed--it was so gross, I asked what he was going to order, he ordered a burger and there I was watching him chew--it was painful, I felt I like I was going to faint.  He gave me a kiss on check after, BARF--said he would like to see me again--NO WAY. I emailed him when I got home and told him I didn't think we would be a good match.  I am ready to stay home and watch movies for a while. Love you guys! xo

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  • Denise2730
    Denise2730 Member Posts: 648
    edited February 2012

    LOL - was the tag viewable to the whole world?

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  • Dragonfly1976
    Dragonfly1976 Member Posts: 1,637
    edited February 2012

    Lovesmyfamily kudos to you for sticking it out, what a guy :(



    Ha ha my pants are on right today thankfully! The pants I wear for walking are tagless ! :) lol

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  • sweetbean
    sweetbean Member Posts: 1,931
    edited February 2012

    Wait. lovemyfamily, so he didn't have any teeth?  At all?  OK, this proves my point that guys are the most optimistic of the species - the fact that he thinks he is competitive WITHOUT TEETH is amazing.  Good grief, I felt awkward about going on dates with TE's in but it wasn't obvious and I was getting new boobs in fairly short order.  Lovesmyfamily, you win the prize.  I got nothing to top that!

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  • paintedlady
    paintedlady Member Posts: 252
    edited February 2012

    Hello Sisters

    I was just reading through the posts: Chil and DF you made me laugh.

    Sweetbean seems like you are doing better: Thai is great.

    Lovemyfamily, I doubt highly if I would go on a date with someone with no teeth lol

    As for me, I am not going out. I intend to not go to that dance again on Saturday. I still have a feeling that guy is lurking around. He only stopped leaving messages on my phone this last Saturday. I definitely am not interested in him.

    It has been very boring because I like to dance. Don't want to go in a bar. The only other dance like the one on Saturday is on Sunday and it is over 2 hours away. There is no way I am going to drive that distance.

    Guess I am going to run and have something to eat

    Have a wonderful day!

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  • hrf
    hrf Member Posts: 3,225
    edited February 2012

    no teeth!!! ok that takes the prize. Men just don't get it and women worry too much ...... i think that story has to go in DF's book ....LOL

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  • negirly
    negirly Member Posts: 318
    edited February 2012

    how come he has 75K to spend on fixing his teeth... if he had that much money they shouldn't have got that bad in the first place.... Just my opinion... I think it's funny and I'm in the tooth business.... I understand though some of the problems could have been from childhood etc...

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  • rakulynda
    rakulynda Member Posts: 286
    edited February 2012

    Thanks klyyn - it sure helps to hear from an objective voice.  Well I spoke with the guy yesterday on the phone and I think this conversation was a deal breaker for me.  His time is so limited because he travels alot and isn't home much.  Anyway, we chatted for a bit and near the end of the conversation he says "sounds like you're chomping at the bit to get together".  UGHHHH!  I said not really, just wanting to know how you're doing.  He then said he had to work on some unemployment stuff today and call back his rock-hounding buddy so at that point I just said, ok, talk to you soon.  He made no mention of getting together so I'm DONE DONE DONE, stick me with a fork DONE.  I'm giving this dating mess a big break!

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  • lovemyfamilysomuch
    lovemyfamilysomuch Member Posts: 1,585
    edited February 2012

    ME TOO Rak!! put a fork in me as well.  No teeth indeed. SHeesh. Freakin men.

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  • Dragonfly1976
    Dragonfly1976 Member Posts: 1,637
    edited February 2012

    Maybe we should change the title of the thread to that "Stick a fork in me I'm done" lol... I am with you ladies, dating is just not for me at this time.

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  • paintedlady
    paintedlady Member Posts: 252
    edited February 2012

    lol   I am laughing so. It is soooo good!  "stick me with a fork" lol

    Thanks Sisters for the laugh

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  • sweetbean
    sweetbean Member Posts: 1,931
    edited February 2012

    Ugh, good for you, raklyunda.  walk away.  you can do better.

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  • Denise2730
    Denise2730 Member Posts: 648
    edited February 2012

    Yep, I'm getting sick of the whole dating scene. I have a guy on Christian Mingle who wants to take me out but I'm so not interested. I realized I'm not interested in anybody. I want my husband back! I miss him, he was such a great boyfriend and in many ways truly a great husband.

    Now here we go with Valentines Day and it will be my second one without him. Is it possible that a person only has one great love in their lifetime and he was mine?

    Denise

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  • twoputter
    twoputter Member Posts: 115
    edited February 2012

    chiluvr...I certainly don't believe there's only one true love for all of us.  I think rather what is important that we maintain the capacity to love.  It's hard to do that when we've been hurt and we are afraid of getting hurt again.  But I definitely don't believe there's only one true love for us in our lifetimes.  I still have a yearning to love someone, so I think it's possible.  To be honest, though, I haven't had much luck lately...still hopeful.

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  • Dragonfly1976
    Dragonfly1976 Member Posts: 1,637
    edited February 2012

    Thinking back to when I was married, I never felt the way that chiluvr described... Maybe I've never truly been in love. That's kind of sad

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  • mybee333
    mybee333 Member Posts: 1,189
    edited February 2012

    Interestingly enough, my ex-husband and I have started cautiously dating again.  While we had our problems, I wish very much we would have gone to marriage counseling and worked hard!! I have been on POF for a couple mos. and I'm amazed at the strange guys on there!! I don't even have to meet them; their profiles say it all! Or a few emails do!!  Anyway I have always missed my ex, (I filed), love him like family or a best friend and we share three amazing children together.  I could certainly use the support right now and he loves me.  I met my A#**%#% BF on POF. Four years of my life lost to him.  The only benefit has been the wisdom gained.  My husband certainly would've stood with me through this whole entire BC thing; there is no doubt in my mind.  So.........we have a few dates and stuff with the kids planned over the next month or so!!

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  • negirly
    negirly Member Posts: 318
    edited February 2012

    mybee - I've heard stories about other women who get divorced and then end up back with their spouse - Like you said, widsom gained by dating others.  No matter what happens with him I hope your happy.

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  • Dragonfly1976
    Dragonfly1976 Member Posts: 1,637
    edited February 2012

    Mybee, best of luck to you!! :) Funny thing, at work today one of our regional directors was on the phone with another lady, I made some joke, he heard me and laughed and said its ok Erika is just like 1 of the guys..... See that's the category I always fall into.

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  • hrf
    hrf Member Posts: 3,225
    edited February 2012

    DF, it could be worse......at least they like you. 

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  • Dragonfly1976
    Dragonfly1976 Member Posts: 1,637
    edited February 2012

    Oh I know, not really complaining just an observation! I never seem to lack for great friends, just have trouble getting past that level. I guess because I can dish it out and take it and joke around with them.

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  • hrf
    hrf Member Posts: 3,225
    edited February 2012

    And that's why you will find the right one. It will start as a friendship and then .....

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  • Dragonfly1976
    Dragonfly1976 Member Posts: 1,637
    edited February 2012

    Hope so.. :) Patiently waiting, cause I am done with the other stuff!

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  • rakulynda
    rakulynda Member Posts: 286
    edited February 2012

    Hey Denise, I can relate to your angst! My (2nd) husband died a year ago this month and I miss him SO much! These pof guys don't hold a candle to him and I'm probably looking for his clone. We were deeply and passionately in love during our 19 years together so I know at least once in my life I've experienced true love. I'll always remember how he cried with me during my 1st dx, how he carried me up the stairs after TRAM reconstruction, fed me with a spoon after Taxol treatments, protected me from nasty family members, encouraged my daughter to go to grad school and raised her as his own and how we held hands while both getting our chemo treatments. Sheesh...here come the tears :( So.... I know one day when it's time to leave this place, he'll be there waiting for me. In the meantime, I'd just like to go out to dinner ocassionally with a nice, normal guy that I don't want to stick a fork into! Guess I'll just have dinner with my mom. Twoputter, I agree, it is possible to love deeply more than once in a lifetime. Why does it have to be so hard? Lynda

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  • lovemyfamilysomuch
    lovemyfamilysomuch Member Posts: 1,585
    edited February 2012

    Rak, I am so sorry for what you lost.  xo

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  • mybee333
    mybee333 Member Posts: 1,189
    edited February 2012

    Rak - I am sorry too.  It is very hard to find true love and a good man. I think memories can be a very good thing in helping us to hold onto what is and has been good in our lives. Your husband sounds like he was a wonderful man.

    On a diff. note:  Is it just the POF  guys (bcuz it's free) or are they as bad on Match? I think I went through about half the guys on POF by either delete or email/a coffee and .............no one I was remotely interested in. Is it just what is available after age 50?  I am not looking now but my friend is and she's having some awful experiences.

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  • Denise2730
    Denise2730 Member Posts: 648
    edited February 2012

    I have found the guys on POF very cheap. And us gals in our 50's have some very slim pickings out there. Since I'm not willing to settle and don't need a man in my life to be happy I expect I will never marry again.

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  • Dragonfly1976
    Dragonfly1976 Member Posts: 1,637
    edited February 2012

    I did POF, match and eharmony off and on for the last couple years and had ZERO luck! I don't get it, pretty pathetic and really discouraging.

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