recurrence questions

Tanya - what you are feeling is normal but as time moves forward those frightening thoughts will enter your head less and less.  Sure we can get percentages but you just never know.  Live today and enjoy today and TRY not to let cancer rule your life.  I know....easier said than done.

I was in your shoes for a year after my dx but now I feel as though I have more control.  I am also in counseling and have been for the past 2 years.  I highly recommend it.

I just really want you to know that what you are feeling and thinking is normal.  ((((( hugs)))))

I think this feeling is completely normal. A few months after I finished rads I felt a lot of anxiety (and had really bad insomnia) thinking about the risk of recurrence (recurrence in that breast, a new primary in the other breast, etc). My first approach was to become a control freak about food (all organic, all the time, 6-9 veggies a day), using healthy cosmetics, avoiding BPA, etc. That's not bad but I went overboard and it made me feel anxious about everything I came in contact with.  On the advice of my MO's nurse I backed off on trying to control everything and like jancie I talked to a counselor and got other support. (and like you, I had been avoiding support groups in part because I didn't want to hear new things for me to worry about.) Our local support center also offers classes for cancer patients that aren't support groups, per se. I go to guided imagery 2 times a month (like meditation, it's very relaxing) and there are exercise and other classes for cancer patients who are currently or completed Tx. Maybe something like that could be an option; you can meet people who've gone through similar things without spending 1-2 hrs talking about it directly. Good luck!  You're going to get through this phase.

Hi there,

My stats are somewhat similar to yours. I am ER- (1% positive)/PR+ and her2neu-. I am BRCA1+.  My onco quoted a much higher recurrence rate. Please PM if you would like to discuss what I have been told. I do not want to add to your anxiety, so let me know if you would like more info.

Dawn

Forget about the statistics that the doctor threw at you!   Here's a better number to focus on.  Today there are close to 3 MILLION breast cancer survivors in the United States. Hope that puts things into perspective for you!

Thoughts and prayers to you and all of our sisters...

hugs all around---

So, at one point, there was some data thrown my way--- something like "you have a 92% chance of this never coming back"....and I was whining to a colleague about how I wanted to be at 100% and he said something I have never forgotten.  He asked me "do you want to live in the 8% for the 92%?"  I decided right then  I would live in the 92%.... for my kids, my h, myself..... 

I am not saying it was easy, but for me, somehow making that decision really turned my thinking around.  I am farther out--- and honestly, don't think about bc most days---- and I operate on the assumption that it is not coming back.  If it does, I will deal with it, but I am not planning on it.... 

counseling can help--we all have to move through this in whatever way works for us-- I did find counseling really helpful in the first year..... 

Statistics are just that--- and you need to know that they always give you the worst case scenario..... 

Beautiful! I love the black and white photo! You look terrific.

I can understand your feelings, although no one told me my prognosis. And I just didn´t ask.

I´m done with chemo now, my last session was a week ago and of course I feel lost. I often ask my boyfried, if everything will be ok. And of course he says yes...but we both know we have no guarantee.

I´m 28, no family history, I don´t smoke, don´t drink and I got breast cancer. The chance to get it under the age of 30 is under 5% I think?!

So I don´t listen to statistics. It is hard to deal with this but we have to. 

I like your pictures :-)

PS gorgeous photos! Thanks for sharing them

Hi all-I'm new to this site and I hope that I can share without causing too much fear and anxiety to you.  The reason I say this is because I've experienced what you all have spent so much time worrying about.  My recurrence occured about 10 months after my bilateral mastectomy.  The doctors were much more shocked then I originally was because this sort of thing is just so uncommon.  My current anxiety stems from wondering if treatment (dose dense ACT  & Rads) is going to keep me from another recurrence and that's what brought me to this forum.  I have placed my life in God's hands and I know that whatever happens is part of His plan for me.  No, my faith is not perfect.  I have my moments of worry and fear, but I know these are thoughts and emotions that I can change if I look to God for help.  My question to this forum is, is there anyone else out there that has experienced a recurrence that happened so quickly?  I'd love to hear from you. 

Hi SnSeattle

Sorry that you're facing this again. Can I ask what treatments/ surgeries you had when first diagnosed? Did you have the Oncotype testing done? Maybe that info will be helpful to those that have experience a recurrence?

Throw the stats out the window.  No one can predict whether you will or will not recur.  But the chances are you will either 100% not recur or you will 100% recur.  You can't 80/20 60/40 recur. 

None of us got BC by choice.  How we react to the dx is our choice. How we react to the possibility of recurrance is our choice.  If you choose to worry you will.  I personally chose to get out and live.  I chose not to give BC more that it took without my permission.  You can do the same.  Push those worries aside and choose to not give cancer any more ground.

I'm one of those people you wouldn't want to meet at a support group.  I've had three different primaries.  Instead of worrying you might find out more things to worry about, why not look at it from a different perspective.  Maybe you'd meet some women who would inspire and encourage you.  It isn't easy and takes some practice, but maybe you'd Learn Not To Worry Until You're Told There's Something To Worry About!

I was given 70% survival, and as you can see it was years ago, but still I have follow ups, I pay attention to any changes in my body.

I was never consumed by my cancer,never thought I could die. The only change in my life is not to be around negative people; I do not do nothing that I do not want, I am not any longer the yes lady.

I post because I want to hear from a long term survivor, am I cured? no, I am in remission.

I work with cancer patients,I keep busy.

Dreaming--it's so refreshing to hear from a long time survivor. I love your attitude about not doing anything you don't want to do....I am very new to this new-reality and feel the exact same way. I always said yes to be a people pleaser. I have this intense inclination to stop wanting to please everyone. I want to stop obsessing about the cancer and I am sure once I have completed most of my treatment I will start back to my Regular Life. We are going on a Disney Cruise next week with our daughter and niece, then the RADS start immediately after. Funny how the universe works with timing....we planned this trip way back in July before this whole Cancer Drama was discovered. Thanks for sharing.

My onc told me that without chemo I had something like a 25% of a distant recurrence (metastatis), but that the chemo would cut that by about a third - bringing it down to 15%.  I found that shockingly high.  I thought that with a 9 mm tumor and negative nodes I would be somewhere in the 90%+ NO distant metastatis range after chemo.

I know that there are many factors that go into estimating recurrence, but he still told me that tumor size and node status remain the biggest predictors and my tumor was so small - very disappointing that I can't even count on early detection, which is something over which I did have control (my new tumor was found during my yearly mammo/sono).

Local recurrence after my BMX is about 1% in each breast, but I don't worry about a local recurrence.