BC Husbands and Boyfriends Hangout

I want to add, my wife has been so incredibly strong and enduring through this, especially radiation. Every day she made that 40 minute drive there and 40 minute drive back and never complained. She finally got a nice burn toward the end, which I knew was ultra sensitive, but she hardly let out a peep. She toughed out 4 surgical procedures, 8 chemos and several trips to Iowa and Wisconsin for medical appointments. Add one trip to the ER for uncontrollable nausea, wig shopping at age 29 and numerous other doctors to treat the side effects of the treatments and it's just amazing how she puts on that smile most days. Did I mention she only missed about 20 days from school for all that?

225 days of torture, done.

Mags I love the kitties and the Cuties! What a happy bunch you are! Carrie I honestly think considering where you have been this is not a bad news thing. They will watch you and that is a blessing!

Okay off to shower for the MRI, hubby said I smelled like goats! They are going to be hungry but I will feed them late tonight!

Shemp,
So happy the treatments are done!!!
Happy dance for being done and for DW's birthday!!!







sending prayers cowgirl for a easy fix!
Carrie

Hi guys, just checking in.
Shemp excellent news about your wife finishing chemo. Here is a happy dance for you [if i get it right].



Couldn't remember which one i needed.

Congrats!!!

Thanks cowgirl, but it's not quite the same thing. I know you've been in pain with your arm - luckily my lymphedema is only mild and doesn't hurt. The bandages are just an inconvenience. Hope there's a quick fix for it any how.
Shemp, I'll give the Margaritas a miss and have a Daiquiri instead.
Hugs
Mags

Quote:

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Shemp,
When do we get Marguaritas?

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If they're strawberry and frozen, I have a feeling my wife wouldn't hesitate in buying for everyone for a whole evening!

Carrie,
You know what I think! This is something you need to do something about before you get to the BC stage, now what that is up to you!

Greg great to hear from you, I hope you are having a good time!

Shemp you buying I am drinking! Course I rarely drink but this is a special occasion!

Carrie, I'm glad it's not the worst news, but I still wish it was something better. I'd never read about that diagnosis until I clicked on your link. That's certainly an unenviable position you're being put in, but as KariLynn said, take your time and think things out and be comfortable with however you want to address it. Best wishes.

Hi guys, I managed to find some spare time today to go and do my blood test. They have always told me that I have thin hidden veins but usually get the blood no problem. Not today though. We started in the usual place and had to stop as she said the vein was reacting. Think she meant that it would have collapsed if we'd carried on. She took the rest from my hand near the knuckles - not very nice at all. So next time I have to go I am going to be stressed even before I get there. I used to go to another microbiologist and I think I'll use her next time. She put a butterfly needle in for me. I'll probably have the results tomorrow or the day after so I'll let you all know how it goes.
Hugs,
Mags

Good luck with the patch - if it works it'll be worth it! DH smokes (not in the houseor car) and the smell stays on him and his breath - yuck!

Hi Carrie, I've just started taking 100mg of aspirin a day to try and keep the blood clots away - don't know it that is too much. I'll look it up later. I already have the liver problem Carrie from the tamoxifen - fatty liver that is why I am worried about my blood tests. I was on a really low fat diet for a while but couldn't keep it up. I stopped smoking 2 years ago when I found the lump - cold turkey - but then I substituted food instead. 20lbs later lol.
My bf smokes in the house and car but it doesn't bother me now. I hate the dirty ash trays though
Cowgirl - when will you get the results of your MRI? My lymphedema therapist says she usually does 20 massages but maybe I can only do 15. That would be another 3 weeks of wrapping. It will be such a relief not to have to do it any more.
Hugs all,
Mags

Hi ladies and gentlemen,
Carrie I am so excited. Greece has finally discovered low fat potato chips. I am so addicted and now I don't have to feel so bad about eating them. Can't wait for the not having to wrap party.
Cowgirl waiting to hear about your MRI. Is this another one?
Were you thinking of me again lol? So pleased you are helping Carrie with her diagnosis. You are both such sweet ladies.
Hugs all,
Mags
xxxxxxxxx

Hi Lacher,



First glad you found us. Any age sucks to deal with this, but our age darn well blows. I think you're bound to see your wife in a different light through this because that's not the person you married. Bald, depressed, moody, yacking in the toilet, and without energy probably wasn't what you were expecting of your wife at age 31. I know, I'm assuming, but I feel pretty comfortable making that call.



The thing is, you'll get your wife back. I know she's likely bottomed out and had some real lows. She'll normalize in time and eventually you can go back to doing the things that made the two of you fall in love and get hitched in the first place.



I understand the not doing enough part. Some days I felt I was doing well, others I thought (knew?) I could or should be doing more. At the same time, you're hoping things are the the way they were, and that you didn't have to change or do more.



Staying emotionally connected is understandably difficult. My wife often says "I know you didn't sign up for this when you said 'I do.'" Well, truth is, I did, but I sure as hell didn't know it. You lose the physical closeness, you lose the time spent doing things she could have done before and you lose the time to just talk because she's not feeling up to even moving or talking during chemo. But again, you get her back eventually.



Through all this, we've been looking forward to doing the things that were temporarily taken away. This summer, we should be able to take another outdoor vacation, and I think she'll have worked back up to a reasonable energy level to have some outdoors fun. She's starting to find that urge again to get back on the bicycles to do some riding and such.



Lastly, I'll add, there's a local place here that does support things for patients and caregivers. Sometimes it's nice to just talk to someone that understands, or at least listens so you can unload. I suspect unloading on a stranger that understands is probably a lot easier for a couple reasons than unloading on a family member or friend.

I would have to say that BC isn't easy on marriage, but for the most part the low is only temporary. Nobody likes it but she will one day feel better, and suddenly your marriage will be strong again.

Update on me, is I have frozen shoulder, not rotator cuff. So resting it was terrible advise, I go for PT on Tuesday. It is going to be a long haul to get well but as always I am too stubborn to give up!