Having a rough day

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beepbeep
beepbeep Member Posts: 84
edited June 2014 in High Risk for Breast Cancer

Hi everyone,

Thought this would be a good place to go for support today. I was diagnosed with what they call a fibroadenoma a few months ago. I've been having armpit pain and leg pain for 1-2 months now. The armpit pain was dismissed after an ultrasound as "nothing to worry about". The pain resolved but now is back. I can't move my arm how I would like and it's bringing me down. My leg hurts when I put weight on it and sometimes hurts on it's own when I'm sitting. The pain is in different parts of my upper leg. Usually the outer thigh but has moved around a little. I've had it since early last month. It's troublesome but I can usually walk without pain. It's getting up from a sitting position that scares me. Even if I decided to see a doctor for this, I don't know who to see. If I was diagnosed with  cancer, I'd see an oncologist. My breast surgeon could not do anything about the leg part and my PCP would probably attempt conservative treatments before considering mets... which I know sounds drastic but that's what I'm fearing.

I also made the terrible mistake of reading my mom's medical records. She died several years ago in her early 40's to breast cancer. I was shocked to read about how much she really suffered during her short battle. It's just so unfair that some women have to go through this and at very young ages. It just made me cry and I know some of you will understand. She had the most aggressive type and it just took her down so fast. It makes me sick that anyone would have to die that way. I kept seeing "young healthy woman" in all of her doctor reports. It's so hard to understand. It's so hard to have faith when so many bad things have happened to my family. I don't know what to do if what I have is cancer. I can't imagine how that will make my family feel. Especially after being told that I was okay. I'm considering prophylactic mastectomy more each day... provided that I'm even okay now. It just seems too hard to play this guessing game, knowing that my chances are pretty high. I want the strength to do what needs to be done but I'm just very weak about this kind of stuff.

Thanks for listening,

hope you are all doing as well as can be expected. We're all in the same boat to some extent.

xo

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  • pupmom
    pupmom Member Posts: 5,068
    edited January 2012

    So sorry you are having this terrible anxiety. And very sorry about what your dear mom went through. For about 10 years,beginning long before I was diagnosed with bc, I have had intermittent bone pain in my right leg. I've had several scans, including two in the last month. Nothing is ever found. I have not had that pain for over 2 years. Docs can't explain it. My bone density tests come back within normal limits and my D3 levels, which were just tested, are normal. It's weird but apparently nothing to worry about. Hoping yours is similar. When we've had this dx in our lives we become ultra vigilant. Some of that is good, but some just torments us unnecessarily. Ask me all about that!

    Prayers and best wishes, yorkie 

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  • beepbeep
    beepbeep Member Posts: 84
    edited January 2012

    Aww thanks yorkie. You're so sweet and have an absolutely adorable doggie!!! :) I'm sure glad your bones are okay and I hope you're making a full recovery. I shouldn't be complaining before I know anything for sure. It just seems inevitable when it happens to your mom. I have a lot of things in common with my mom and look just like her. Only makes it seem more inevitable. Once your mind becomes aware of the BC dangers, it does go into hypersensitive mode. I'm sure even more so for women that are fighting the disease.  Some of it is real, some of it might be hypochondria and some of it might go unexplained forever. I've never had pain in my leg like this or in my armpit so it's very suspicious but I want so badly to believe in my original diagnosis that it's causing me to drag my feet about seeing a doctor...

    You are among the real soldiers though and I'm so glad you are doing well. THANK you for your kind words

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  • pupmom
    pupmom Member Posts: 5,068
    edited January 2012

    You're welcome beepbeep! My sister had DCIS at age 35. She got a mastectomy and has not had a recurrence. She's now age 60. I was hypervigilent all these years beccause of her history. It finally got me, but at an age when it is more likely to appear anyway. My genetic testing came back negative. I am so grateful for that because of my children. Hang in there dear!

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