Choosing Not to Reconstruct

Hi Mary,

I had my BMX with no reconstruction 8 weeks ago.  I went from Lumpectomy to a Mastectomy to a BMX in one week.  I cried for a night after I realized they both were going and then moved on with the decision you are making now.  I know everyone tells you this is a personal decision... I read the posts and researched as you are doing now...trying to make the best decision for me.  I do not regret my decision, I was never a tummy sleeper, I am very athletic/active and wanted the fastest route to a full recovery.  I also did not want to cut up any other parts of my body for reconstruction...I am 5'7 123 lbs...I wasn't going to remove tissue from my but...that I sit on everyday...nor remove muscle elsewhere or skin grafting...additional infections were a major concern for me and the entire reconstruction process seemed brutal.  Being I was unlucky to get the cancer in the first place, but be lucky enough to find it early...I figured I would use the luck I have left for the Chemo.  If you choose not to reconstruct, make sure you a have a therapist that is familiar with this type of healing, I found that my Surgean wanted me to reconstruct, but finally understood my reasoning behind not doing so, she even showed me her stitch work to prove she was worthy, normally a plastic surgeon steps in.  Also one of my friends who had a BMX with reconstruction - her boobs swell when she exercises, I don't have that, my swelling is in the tissue around the scars..if I over do it I have to rest and wear compression shirts to keep the swelling down, so I can do Physical Therapy.  Doing the laundry is not as important as being able to get full motion back.  I found comfortable compression shirts in Kohl's.  I am over the top extremely active, a "Ant's in the Pants" kinda person, ex...1^st thing I did after surgery in the recovery, was to start waving my arms around and yelling to everyone that I could move them...I got Demerol shots to stop that.   Either way I know you'll do just fine.

I was told I could do what I want but my surgeon and Radiology Onc said wait a year. The Rad Onc said a year from the end of rads.

Thanx Mary I'll keep that in mind..getting that call last Wednesday night cancelling the 1st Chemo session , really took the sails out of our little boat...but I'm trying to not think about it...

Momine...the recovery nurse wasn't laughing with me!!  My surgean had scared the crap out of me that I may wake up and not be able to use my left arm...I spent a lot of time designing bandages to not use the arm (I know I never listen untill I'm in tons of pain or hurt myself).  She kept giving me Demeral-3 shots total...each time I woke up, I did the same thing...then I started noticing the beeping sounds...the machines I was hooked up to were reporting my heart rate was toooooo low..she then yelled at me and told me I had to cut this out, as my reps? were too low...I said well then stop giving my the &*^*^^ shots!!....new motto for me is to "Speak my mind, cause biting my tongue hurts too much"!

Microcopic Cells is always a concern..I had a Vacuum assisted needle core biopsy in the left (cancer side) and a needle core biopsy in the right (benign cysts).  Reconstruction, TE est.. was not an issue for me as I chose not to do any reconc..  My surgean and I discussed not cutting any muscles as I use them all day as a mechanic, auto body painter and driver and the recovery time for muscle repair was long and painful should I damage or tear them...  (of course she was going to remove any effected muscles, etc.. that turned up from the Lymphoscintigraphy shot) so I had no idea how I would wake up.  My Ultra sounds were blurry due to dense tissue etc...so there were a lot of unknowns....My Surgeon took great care not to even nick a muscle...she was really open to my concerns and fears and her husband (believe it or not) was explaining my driving duties and told her I had most definitely made the right decision for my career, in his opinion.  We are concerned with the chance pieces broke off and the "Pernieural invasion present" on the Pathology report.  We know that the BMX may not have gotton everything, and the Oncotyoe came back at 19..hence we opted for ACT Chemo with the "T" given last, once a week for 12 separate sessions to monitor the nerve damage this may cause...I am happy with the crew I have, shooting for the best possible outcome. 

PCBarbie, it was your respiration that the recovery nurse was worried about! To funny!!!! Like you said, quit giving me the Demerol, then!!!! hehehehehehe

I have a habit of stopping breathing in recovery. Drives me nuts, but I'm used to waking up to the alarms and people around me yelling at me to breathe!

My BMX was 7/1/2010, no reconstruction, and I am very happy with my decision.  My reasons for no reconstruction:

1) Mammograms missed my tumour, and at the time of diagnosis I was stage III with a lump that couldn't even be felt if I was lying down, only upright.  I don't want anything interfering with my self-exams.  I want follow-up to be as simple as possible.  I don't even care if there is research data one way or the other, I don't want the anxiety I know I'd feel trying to examine more tissue or around the edges of things.

2) I didn't want more surgery.

3) I didn't want numb masses on my chest.  What I miss about my breasts is the nipple sensation and I wasn't getting that back, so why bother.

4) I had always been unhappy that I wasn't comfortable without a bra on.  My breasts were just in the way a lot.

My BS's practice tried to schedule me with a PS, but when I talked with the BS about it she didn't try to pressure me at all.  Actually said she'd probably do the same thing.  There is supposedly some research out there that women who have had reconstructions are better off psychologically, but I've never bothered to track it down because I reallyd don't think it's relevant to me.  Even if it is something most people choose, it's not for me.  

I have thought about getting foobs for special occasions, but so far I haven't bothered.  I've adjusted my wardrobe and feel pretty good about how I look.

Hmm, can't believe they are happier!!! They have a year to 2 years of surgery ahead of them for recon. The continued drama of fills and surgeries to tweak their look, then disappointment when they realize they aren't their "own" breasts at all, but lumps of fat (or implants) on their chest!! I found I got over the cancer diagnosis a LOT quicker by no recon!!! My scar is minimal and almost gone now, 3 years out. I still have the same scares about new lumps as someone with recon has, that doesn't change, but my "drama" was over 2 weeks after diagnosis!!

I read something recently and I`m sure I have the EXACT numbers wrong, but it was something like: in the US 30% of women get recon and only 20% in Canada. Yep, it was that LOW of numbers!!! I think the docs would LIKE us to get recon as that`s certainly an expensive and cool surgery for them.

I was told that in the US, 50% of women reconsruct & in my geographical region, slightly higher.

My DH thinks alot like mary625s, He said it was a "no brainer" "just one more thing to go wrong". I don't know what I would have done if he thought I should have had recon. It was the only appt he went with me to, I was glad he heard what the BS had to say. I had bilat BC & one side had nipple involvement & would not lends itself to a lumpectomy. The other side I could have had a lumpectomy. I had a BMX.

I never consulted with a PS. I just couldn't see putting myself thru additonal surgery & recovery.

I'm a little over a year after BMX.  I didn't want any more surgeries and was worried about complications/infections that so many seem to experience with reconstruction.  I'm very happy with my decision.  I wear foobs most of the time and had no problem getting used to them.  My stomach protrudes a bit, so I look weird without them. 

Outfield: Boy did you hit a chord for me. "It seems like it is mentioned everywhere, and I feel like some of the national organizations kind of push it.  I really want it to be available to to women who want it, but I would have been steaming angry if my BS had tried to talk me into it."   My thoughts exactly, should be readily available to those who want it and would be steaming angry if anyone had tried to talk me into it.  I do agree that I see a big push among professionals and the national organizations who seem to have bought in to a group think.

In my mid 20's when I decided on sterilization, I had to fight the group think, tooth and nail to get it.  All the dire predictions of I would change my mind...... I am now past 60 and that would be when??  Yes, a far different decision altogether but similar when trying to fight another's pre-conceived ideas that they feel compelled to force onto others.

Barbara 

Hi.  Just joining in here:  I had a BMX in April, no recon, and I'm very very pleased with my decision.  My BS also pushed recon.  She told me that a woman doesn't feel like a woman without breasts.  Well, I feel very much like a woman.  I didn't want the additional surgeries or the additional risk, and my DH said, that if I get recon, but don't have any sensation there, what's the point?  I am also very active and was more concerned about function than anything else.  I have absolutely no regrets about not reconstructing.  I love going without a bra, and by the way, unless I tell people, no one seems to notice.  I've just had comments about looking thinner. 

I am beginning to see I was really fortunate to have a BS that did not have an agenda either way.

I rushed into reconstruction surgery with the saline implant and stretcher. The focus began to be on "building the boob" instead of curing me of cancer. Too many additional appointments with the Plastic Surgeon, alot of pain with trying to stretch the skin. You are right you look at the pictures and they never will be a matched set. I gained weight because of the Tamoxifen natural one became a C cup and the implant was a B cup had to purchase a cutlet to fill out my bra. I'd focus on getting into remission and then make the best choice for you.