Just Finished Chemo and Rads

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ladyboss1997
ladyboss1997 Member Posts: 202

I just finished 33 sessions of radiation after 4 sessions of chemo (TC).  I start Tamoxifen on 12/12/11. I have scans again on 12/16, and I am already worried about a recurrence, or another cancer. Can I really live like this the rest of my life? This fear of recurrence will be on the back of my mind every day. 

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  • Megadotz
    Megadotz Member Posts: 302
    edited December 2011

    Hi,  I finished my active treatment (TACx6 and 35 rads) a little over two years ago.  I've been on Femara (like Tamoxifen  but for post menopausal). 

    The transition from active treatment is a bit tough, we no longer have our team treating and checking up on us all the time.  I got into a support group for  women finishing up active treatment and it was a big help.  There also some online ones -- I know Cancercare.org sponsors some of those.

     I also found the book  After Breast Cancer to be very helpful,  Here's a link to it on amazon (thye have a look inside feature for the book) http://www.amazon.com/After-Breast-Cancer-Common-Sense-Treatment/dp/0553384252/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1322753760&sr=8-1#_

     The bottom line is that recurrence is a possiblity, but worrying about it doesn't have to interfere with your life if you set up some sensible guidelines -- like doing your monthly self exam, and talking to your MO about what you should call the office about.  

    Finding a balance between being diligent having a good attitude is tricky.  We only move foreward  in this life, make sure you let yourself enjoy the journey.

    All the best in getting used to the "new" new normal.

  • ladyboss1997
    ladyboss1997 Member Posts: 202
    edited December 2011

    Megadotz: thanks for your response. It is good to hear from someone who is having good results. Many of the things I read here are very scary. Also, thanks on the book hint. I am reading "Dancing in Limbo", and it has validated many of my feelings and fears. Thanks for the smile and your love of life.  Cool 

  • Megadotz
    Megadotz Member Posts: 302
    edited December 2011

    Hi,  

    Glad to give you a smile.  The book is a good one,  I know I found it very helpful.  

    I saw a great play earlier this year Let Me Down Easy that deals with cancer among other things.  PBS filmed it (the week before I went) and it going to air it as part of the Great Performances series in mid January.

    Here are a couple of links about it to give you an idea if it's something you'd like see:

    PBS description:

    http://www.pbs.org/wnet/gperf/episodes/anna-deavere-smiths-let-me-down-easy/production-announcement/1087/ 

    Review:

    http://dctheatrescene.com/2011/01/10/let-me-down-easy/

    Here's hoping that you are going to have a noneventful recovery, but know where the resources are if need be.

    All the best,

    Meg 

  • ladyboss1997
    ladyboss1997 Member Posts: 202
    edited December 2011

    Meg: I ordered the book you recommended, plus Dr. Susan Love's Breast book. I will watch for the movie on PBS. Resources are important, although I am not sure a support group is for me.  I have decided to live each day to its fullest with the intention of kicking this thing in the butt!  -  Diana

  • Megadotz
    Megadotz Member Posts: 302
    edited December 2011

    LadyBoss,

    I'm glad about your decision.  With resources, take what works for you and leave the others behind. 

    I am quite convinced of you butt kicking prowess on this journey.

     Go get'em!

    Meg

  • ladyboss1997
    ladyboss1997 Member Posts: 202
    edited December 2011

    I am 8 days out from my last radiation. The brown area on my breast is slowly going away. Even though I thought the radiation was not making me tired, I seem to get stronger every day. I get ready for work faster and I am upping my weights at the gym. I suppose the cumulative effect of chemo, then radiation had more of an effect on me than I thought. I just want to get through my scans on 12/16. I want to go into Christmas with no cancer scares.     

  • ladyboss1997
    ladyboss1997 Member Posts: 202
    edited December 2011

    I had my port removed yesterday. The shots they used to deaden it hurt like hell, but otherwise - not a big deal. I guess after what I have been through the last 6 months, that was nothing. Still have my scans on 12/16. 

  • Megadotz
    Megadotz Member Posts: 302
    edited December 2011

    Sounds like you're on the right path.  Those months of treatment certainly give us a high bar  to compare new challenges to.

    Here's to clear scans on the 16th!

    Meg

  • ladyboss1997
    ladyboss1997 Member Posts: 202
    edited December 2011

    Hey Meg:  you seem to be the only one chiming into my blog. Glad to have you as a sounding board. I have decided that I am going to use this blog as my personal journal. Maybe my thoughts, fellings, and fears over the next few months can help someone else.

  • dlrcpa
    dlrcpa Member Posts: 134
    edited December 2011

    Hello!!  I am 7 years out (diagnosed summer 2004) and doing just great!  I hope you do great too. I was 48 at diagnosis, so 55 now. I got a dog right after finishing rads and we walk a LOT.  I hope you will take this opportunity to get out and do stuff - whatever you feel up to taking on.  Join a club, start a new hobby, get involved in a project. I quit my corporate job in 2005 and went to work for a smaller firm with a much more relaxed environment.  Pay is less too but that's fine for me.

    Plan something fun for the 16th - movie and popcorn?  I saw Win/Win recently and thought it was great if you are looking for ideas....

  • ladyboss1997
    ladyboss1997 Member Posts: 202
    edited December 2011

    Thank you, dircpa: I need all the positives and inspiration I can get. Keep 'em coming . . .

  • Megadotz
    Megadotz Member Posts: 302
    edited December 2011

    Donna has a great plan -- pamper yourself a bit.    Getting out and trying new things helps to put things in perspecitve.

     Cheers,

    Meg

  • dlrcpa
    dlrcpa Member Posts: 134
    edited December 2011

    Of course there is always "retail therapy'. - my BC surgeon was the first person I ever heard use that term - back around 2005 I guess.  But the malls are so crowded right now!  I had to go to a shopping center to pick up some pictures after work and it was a zoo!  Hm, I will either be baking cookies or watching a movie on Friday night.

  • ladyboss1997
    ladyboss1997 Member Posts: 202
    edited December 2011

    Well, husband is taking me to the scans in the morning. Then he is going to take me to lunch at the restaurant of my choice. I am a Mexican food fiend, so I already have my restaurant chosen. I will be starving because I can have no food or water the 4 hours prior to scans.  Then we are going to go see my hair stylist and let her look at my 1/2 inch hair that is growing in all crazy directions. Then it will be sit and wait for a phone call. Hopefully that will come tomorrow night.      

  • Megadotz
    Megadotz Member Posts: 302
    edited December 2011

    Ladyboss,

    Looks like you have the day well planned out.  Lunch at your favorite restaurant sounds like a winner.  Getting the new growth evened out is a great start with new hir growth.

    Might want to put on a few DVDs while waiting fro the phone call.  I'm a bit jealous, the results usually took days whenever I had test.

    Fingers crosssed for goood results.

    Meg 

  • ladyboss1997
    ladyboss1997 Member Posts: 202
    edited December 2011

    I had my scans on Friday. Husband took me to lunch, then shopping. I didn't get a phone call on Friday afternoon. Both technicians that did my scan said it would be Monday before the radiologist looked at the scans. So now I am in waiting for the phone call. Pretty scared . . .

  • Claire_in_Seattle
    Claire_in_Seattle Member Posts: 4,570
    edited December 2011

    I take the view that I am past everything until proven otherwise.  Oddly enough, I was much more worried when I saw my internist that with any subsequent oncologist visits.  I was worried about needing to mend my evil ways.  Fortunately, I was just fine.

    Congrats on getting through everything.  I did find that it took about a year to get my full energy back.  And this is someone who did major cycling events immediately after finishing radiation.  I was in the 90-100% for about 11 months.

    One thing to get is a makeover by an aesthetician who knows her stuff.  And invest in good haircuts going forward. 

    Two years out, I am just fine. - Claire

  • ruthbru
    ruthbru Member Posts: 57,235
    edited December 2011

    Almost 5 years out and am fine too.

    Really throw yourself back into life; do the things you enjoy, take up new hobbies you've always wanted to try but didn't take time for, volunteer for a cause you believe in, exercise, plan the vacation that you've said, "Someday I would love to go to.....".

  • ladyboss1997
    ladyboss1997 Member Posts: 202
    edited December 2011

    Claire/Ruth: thanks for the encouraging words . . .I have been told that I will always have this fear every time I get scans or mammos. I guess that is just part of it. I find that I am getting stronger every day. I continued working out at the gym during the entire ordeal, so that helped. My hair stylist trimmed up my 1/2 inch hair a little on Friday, then put me on a monthly schedule for trims. That made me feel like real person again.   

    Claire: I am a mountain-biker, although I have not started back since finishing rads. Mostly because I finished rads at the holiday season. Hope to get back to it in January.   

    Ruth: I am "on it" as far as doing the things now that I had planned to do someday. 

    Thanks, ladies! Diana

  • ruthbru
    ruthbru Member Posts: 57,235
    edited December 2011

    Check out the 'Lets Post Our Daily Exercise' thread on the fitness forum. It is a really fun thread with ladies in all stages of treatment and post treatment.

    I am, and will always be, a nervous wreck before rechecks; that is just the way that is. Frown

  • Claire_in_Seattle
    Claire_in_Seattle Member Posts: 4,570
    edited December 2011

    Diana.....actually, the holiday is the BEST time to get out there.  It gets you away from the groaning board, and able to partake guilt free.  Plus, minimal damage.

    I learned this years ago.

    I think you are still early into the hair grow-out, but my stylist cut mine so it would just grow and look decent.  This has worked really well.  A tiny bit shaggy, but it looks just fine, about 2" longer than in my photo.

    Even if you take your mountain bike on the road for 10 miles or so, you will be ahead of the game.  I think you will need to rebuild cardio and strength for the paths, so this would be a great way to start.

    Plus, there will be less of you when you do hit those trails. - Claire

  • ladyboss1997
    ladyboss1997 Member Posts: 202
    edited December 2011

    Well, I got the call at 4:30p. My scans are CLEAR!  Yea!

  • Megadotz
    Megadotz Member Posts: 302
    edited December 2011

    Great news!  Sounds like time to hit your favorite restuarant agina.

  • ruthbru
    ruthbru Member Posts: 57,235
    edited December 2011
    Cool...now relax and enjoy!
  • ladyboss1997
    ladyboss1997 Member Posts: 202
    edited December 2011

    I will be out of touch for the next few days. I hope all of you have a very Merry Christmas.

    Diana 

  • ruthbru
    ruthbru Member Posts: 57,235
    edited December 2011

    Merry Christmas to you too!

  • dlrcpa
    dlrcpa Member Posts: 134
    edited December 2011

    Oops, late to the party. Great news and I hope everyone has a nice Christmas. It as been unusually warm here for December and I'll take it!!  I don't need a white Christmas!

  • msphil
    msphil Member Posts: 1,536
    edited December 2011

    Hello sweetie, the thoughts of reoccurence will eventually leave, I also had it for awhile, always wondering when and (If) but keeping Positive thoughts and having HOPE, saying each day I will live and this cancer will NOT return worked for me.  And take it from me for I am a 18  yr Survivor this past December 17th(Praise GOD). Happy Holidays and Blessed, Healthy New Year. msphil(idc, stage 2, 3 nodes, L mast with recon(didn,t take) chemo, Got Married,rads and 5 yrs on Tamoxifen.      

  • ladyboss1997
    ladyboss1997 Member Posts: 202
    edited December 2011

    msphil: good for you! I like the positive attitude. I work on my positives every day.

    You ladies are the best!  The best encouragement I get is from this blog.

     Diana

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