WHY would I put myself through this?

Glad your team took your concerns seriously, and that you are doing better this round. Treat yourself gently, this too shall pass.

Bump - we're anxiously waiting to hear from you!!! Hope you're OK.

Nicely said Jenn - LadyGrey has done 2 treatments so far. The first wasn't so good but she did go for the second one armed to the teeth with drugs to help.

You should post your thoughts on the Alternative board. Some people just don't understand how agressive HER2+ve bc is and they are determined to go with unproven alternative treatments - that scares the s--t out of me.

Sorry you have this diagnosis, but at least it's better than some others ie at least we have targeted therapy for our bc.

Sue

Lady,   They can change the herceptin dosage to accomodate your schedule and it does not change the way it works or the effectiveness.   When I went on vacation they gave me the three week dose which took 90 mins to administer.....once I had the two week and that took 1 hr, but normally I had the weekly and it was for 30 mins.  30 mins per week was how they figured it.  Maybe you could ask about this and that would allow you to be with family for all the holidays.  It sounds to me like you are handling things quite well.

I think IowaSue was saying a lot of SEs were a case of mind over matter for her....don't think she was implying that SEs are not very real for many.  I have been extrmely fortunate that I just don't get typical SEs....right now I am doing adriamycin and I can truthfully say I was very afraid of it after all I had heard....so far I have only have two treatments, 2nd one today and about all it has done to me is make me feel like I am sleeping my life away so again I consider myself to be very fortunate......knock on wood.  

Chemo makes many people tired. Tiredness, especially the week after, was the most annoying side effect.There is nothing wrong with you and sometimes you need to just give into it and get extra rest. (It didn't give me much choice about that sometimes.) Hang in there, 2 down so you are a third of the way through.

You might ask your onc about trying to taper the steroids. It sometimes helps.

I am so glad you are exercising; it will help you bounce back so much quicker once you are done. Let other people take over everything that you don't want to or feel up to doing....save your energy for the things that are most important to you. Keep hanging in there! Ruth

Tlg-have you read the Suzanne Somers books? She did a combination of radiation and lumpectomy anf then has done alternative therapies. Instead of tamoxifen, she took something else...marigold, maybe. I've read a couple of them, and why they are a little out there in some cases, I like some of the things she has chosen to do.

Lady Gray, I'm hearing you. I' was told that herceptin had no side effects other than heart problems. Are you finished with chemo? Is it just the herceptn giving you problems?

I hate that you think you 'aren't handling this well'.  Why in the world do we women always think we have to be superwoman and just carry on like normal no matter what we are going through?

I had AC instead of TCH but I felt like crap the week after.  What made it bearable was that I was retired and I also made it clear to hubby not to expect me to do squat that week.  I got up and took a shower every day because it made me feel better ... and then had to go take a nap.  And I toddled off for a nap whenever I felt like it.  I was actually glad I didn't have hair because that was one less thing I had to mess with.   I cooked a roast, or a lasagna, or a turkey breast before each treatment and that was his dinner for the week.  Other than that he could eat out or eat peanut butter sandwiches ... not my problem.  A trip to the grocery store during my good week still had to be the only project for the day ... and required a nap after I got home.   We are not 'tired' in the way people normally think of it ... it goes way beyond that and is not cured by a nap.

I feel bad for those who have to take care of children and try to work at a job while doing chemo.  And I admire those who did well at it.  But I think most of us just endure it one step at a time and have to keep reminding ourselves that it is temporary.  I was a total grump.  I tell people it's 'doable' and it is ... that does not mean it does not suck.  And you know what ... a man with a bad head cold thinks nothing of laying around complaining and expecting to be waited on ... so why do women doing chemo think we shouldn't bitch and moan or expect special treatment? 

What I am trying to say is pamper yourself ... you deserve it!  Neither are you required to like any of this one little bit.  You are doing what needs to be done in spite of the fact that it is extremely unpleasant.  I'd say that rates a big 'atta girl'.

You are doing this because it is your best shot to kill off your HER2+ cancer so you will not have to deal with it later in worse places.  That is not stupid ... it is smart IMHO.  (((hugs)))    

White Rabbit-----AMEN SISTER!!! Loved your post.

I was just thinking I have barely cooked in a year. Much easier for me as one child is on his own and the other just finished school in California. I highly recommend Wolfgang Puck's Organic free range chicken soup with egg noodles. Just tastes good when you don't feel like eating much.

I napped all the time..actually still do as the every three weeks herceptin is much harder on me now. It wears me out, makes me a little queasy off and on, which responds to zofran. I did have joint pain, but once we lengthened the time of infusion to 90 minutes instead of 30, many of those SE's went away. I am a realtor now, after years of working in senior management with sponsors in sports event management. I didn't do much this past year by choice, and am glad I am in a position where I can schedule in naptime between client appointments.

And while I wouldn't say I am totally grumpy, I'm certainly not a cheerleader. They really get on my nerves, especially the ones who tell me that after they go through everything, they feel like they are better people who learned life lessons. Puhlease. They only lesson that I feel was more reinforced than learned, was how great my circle of friends and family is. I thought we would lose a lot of our couple friends, whose husbands couldn't deal with all my issues, and those husbands have been wonderful. Much more supportive than I expected. I am, by nature, an optimistic person, so I do tend to bouce back from things usually, but this diagnosis took me a long time, and I can honestly say, I still do not handle the HER2 part well. It still causes me great stress to think that stage 1, no nodes, mastectomy, chemo, herceptin and a couple of rogue cells can send me to stage IV in distant locations in a heartbeat.

I am finally starting to laugh again and feel a little more like me (I think I am very funny).

A great book to read is Five Lessons I Didn't Learn from Breast Cancer, by Shelly Lewis. After reading several warrior books, do good kinds, etc, this one is irreverent, funny and a lot like my personality. I read parts of it out loud to my husband and he said it sounded like I wrote the book.

TLG-I hope things get a little better for you. I feel terrible that you don't have a good relationship with your oncologist. My relationship with the Onc and PS really helped me through. The PS is funny and irreverent and the Onc is spiritual...meditates and does yoga (teaches it to us 2 nights a week). By some luck of the draw, their offices are next door to each other, so I always saw them both on the same day. I would have my spiritual fix, and then the PS would blow it all to hell with his craziness that would leave me laughing. It helped a lot.

I will say the one thing this did for my kids, particularly my 23 year old, model-dancer-actress-singer daughter, is cause her to realize the world no longer revolves around her drama (and she and her friends always had some kind of drama ongoing). She has really become very thoughtful toward others. Maybe she just grew up in the last year, but I think my diagnosis made her look at things differently. Although she is still as stubborn and pigheaded as ever....a trait she inherited honestly from me. LOL

If there is anything more we can do for you besides listen, please let us know.

Jill

I really hope things go smoothly with your surgery eve and you can get right back to work x

I don't know, maybe I went into this differently...

I went into this knowing I would feel bad at times.  And I did.  I actually ended up dehydrated and had to go in for fluids.  But there were times during chemo that I felt good and was able to enjoy some things with my kids.  I know everyone is not the same but looking back I did not feel bad all the time...

Good thoughts to all going through chemo, surgery etc.

(Did not mean to sound like "chemo cheerleader")