Fearful I am not worrying enuf

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Nel138281
Nel138281 Member Posts: 2,124
edited June 2014 in Managing Side Effects of Breast Cancer and Its Treatment

I was dx with inflammatory breast cancer at the end of September, it has not spread so I am very grateful.  I am having my port put in on Wednesday but have already started chemo (taxol and hepceptrin sp?) .  I think I am in my head too much.  I am worrying about not worrying enough.  Does that make sense.  I certainly have days and hours where I am terrified, but more often than not I feel, emotionally OK.  I am so early in treatment, but have already seen changes in my breast that are positive so am very hopeful.  The first few weeks I would cry at the drop of a hat.  Does anyone else experience this?   I feel like I might be crazy or in serious denial. 

Gentle evening

Nel

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  • Blayze7
    Blayze7 Member Posts: 35
    edited November 2011

    Nel believe me we are always a ball of emotions. Anyone will tell you what you are feeling is okay. If you feel like it is too overwhelming then speak to someone. This journey is never traveled alone.

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  • dragonfly55
    dragonfly55 Member Posts: 235
    edited November 2011

    Nel,

    I find this whole thing takes your mind and emotions all over the place. I think your mind adapts and you get those periods of calm or okayness. Since you still get your moments of fear or sadness, I don't think you are in denial. And as Blayse7 suggested talk to someone if things get overwhelming.

    Take care of you. Wishing you good health.

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  • Moderators
    Moderators Member Posts: 25,912
    edited November 2011

    Nel, there was a study reported earlier this year about how the amount that women worry about breast cancer or a recurrence varies. There is a wide range of reactions! As Blayze and dragonfly have advised, seek help if you feel you need it, and of course there's always support here at BCO.

    Breast Cancer Worry Varies

    Judith and the Mods

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  • Nel138281
    Nel138281 Member Posts: 2,124
    edited November 2011

    Thank you all for your genlte words.  I have a counselor I have seen for awhile, long before the cander DX, due to other family issues.  It is hugely helpful and you have said, he reinforced that i will have good days and more difficult.  An even keel would be great, but apparently not to be.

    Nel

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  • 53greenrose
    53greenrose Member Posts: 6
    edited December 2011

    I haven't a lick of fear with my recent diagnosis......, but back in 1998 when my first calcifications were found & I had to have a core needle biopsy, the fear was stomach clutching. I mostly feel pretty calm, just another bump in the road, but then I've never been one to wish for super long life. I have had moments of great anger about getting cancer  & impatience with the whole process. Who knows, it's early days for me. I still have to have 16 days of radiation & come to a decision about HT.

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