Have any of you found love after your diagnosis and treatment?

Hi Twoputter

I honestly used to think there was something wrong with me too - here I was trying to make a relationship work when the 'chemistry' just wasn't there because I thought maybe if I tried it would come but it never did. You're not crazy at all. If it isn't there, it isn't there. I wasn't being too fussy I just knew it didn't feel right. Sometimes the personalities of the men were great but the chemistry was missing - it was frustrating. My husband has everything I'd ever looked for in a man - I never compromised and ended up with exactly what I wanted it's taken years and years but I knew that if I compromised, I'd end up being unhappy and divorced. My husband nursed his first wife through a brain tumour for 5 years. You'd think he'd run away from me - somebody having had cancer but he knew exactly what he was taking on and he's been amazing during any panics I've had plus still due to have reconstruction and he's amazingly supportive. Please don't give up just know how you want/need to feel about somebody and if it's not there it's not there and you're not crazy! xx

I'm just tired of looking for "Mr. Right".  He sure doesn't have to be perfect; I just have to love him.  I guess I would like for my last years (who knows how many?) to be shared with someone.  It may not happen, but not for lack of trying on my part.  Thanks for your encouragement.  Would not like myself if I settled.

Hmmm.... lol I am leaning towards that man does NOT exist! I have tons of guy friends that treat me right and make me laugh but no love! Maybe it's my fault, the guys seem interested at first. Do I scare them away? Am I too jaded from the past? I don't know, but I'm being me, and don't know if honestly I'll find something. The search is exhausting and a real damper on self esteem.

I really think my care free attitude, independence, and self sufficient lifestyle/attitude is not attractive to most guys, maybe it's intimidating. Again, that's me, can't/won't change, for the right guy those things will be a plus. I guess I just don't see why none of the guys see what you guys see? On match and plenty of fish I don't get hardly any messages or response.

You know that is so very true, look at the last guy I dated from there. I mean he's still on there looking, and he's a true train wreck! lol...

I am feeling very grateful for finding a new gentleman friend who likes and appreciates my strength.  It feels freeing.

Paula wishing you very well on Thursday!!! 

Yeah for you on the new guy!  I hope you find lots of happiness with him.  Does he have a brother??? 

Hey ladies, just checking in.... all is quiet here on the boy/dating scene! Guess that is good, means no broken heart I heard this great saying today " Never let your tears & sensitivity blind you. If someone hurt you, they showed you who they truly are. Move on, stay strong"

This is such a perfect saying, and made me think back...

Hi ladies,been awhile since I've been on here, but I've read your posts.

Sorry so many seem to still be healing from broken hearts and some seem to have given up on finding love. Only you can know your heart and where you are right now, but I pray that you will again find a way to open up your heart to love.

I know all about being broken hearted and thinking that maybe somehow I just wasn't meant to find true love. I was married for 11 years to a grear guy, we had been friends for 5 years before we married. Still a great guy, but we mistook great friendship for great love and eventually grew apart. I loved this man, but looking back I can now admit that I was never really "in love" with him, not the way your suppost to be, or the way I wanted to be. Right after divorce completly fell head over heals in love with a man that I had just started working with. Had all the butterflies, couldn't stop thinking about him, envisioned a future with him, was totally consumed by love for him, Unfortunantly so consumed that I didn't or didn't want to see all the red flags with his behavior. Like many of you have said, he was so the aggresive one in the relationship at first, telling me how much he loved me, that I was the only women he had really ever loved, that he had waited his whole life for me, yada yada yada. Of course once he got me, it all changed and I found myself being hurt over and over again and coming pretty close to losing my mind. Then BC hit and finally I put myself first and left what had turned into an emotionally abusive relationship. I was still completely in love with this man, but I knew I could never survive cancer if I was emotionally dead. Shortly after leaving this relationship, a man that I had briefly dated a year earlier started coming around. At first he was just a supportive friend with my cancer. I had always been attracted to this man, and I had never laughed so much with someone or had as much fun with someone, but I didn't initally feel that overwhelming love that I had for the previous jerk. For some reason I thought that this meant that the new guy wasn't the one. It took me a couple of months but one day I looked at this new man/my old friend and realized that for the first time in my life I had found true love. Not a comfortable relationship or and addiction, but a true love and have grown more and more in love with this man everyday. I can't imagine my life without him and I can't imagine every being with another man. He is the love of my life, my soul mate and I never saw him coming.

That's him in my avatar, Mr. super sexy. We plan on marrying in the next year and honestly, even with this past year of BC, I have never been happier in my life.

The moral of this story is, be careful if you give up-you never know what's right around the corner.

So sorry to hear that Kiley, I know that's hard to deal with. Pets are so special! I bet Chubs had a great life with you! We moved for my job a couple months ago. Our 1 cat we'd had for 4 1/2 years or so ran off, then my daughters fish died this weekend, and our other cat she found Monday, it has been hit by a car we've always had some sort of pet so it's quite the empty feeling

Fearlessone-we work together and had remained friends. It's funny that sometimes you find that the one thing you've been looking for has been right infront of you the whole time.

Let me just say again, he is wonderful., Sexy, handsome, strong, kind, generous, loving, supportive, funny-everything I could have ever dreamed of.

Wishing all of you love and laughter through your journeys.

Paula, so happy you found some one who is making you happy!  Your post just bubbles off the page!Hoping all goes well with your tests today.  Please let us know.  Yes, my home is very empty with out Chubs.  I was so blessed to have him in my life.  He was my constant companion for 17 years.  That unconditional love.........He is forever in my heart and mind,,,,,,,,,So very sorry DF for the loss of your kitty and fish, not a good weekend for pets, sadly.     Kiley

Sadly no Fearless!