Need to leave the board

I PM'd you something!  

Kayce, you need to do what helps you.  What anyone else thinks is irrelevant.  If it were me, I would tell that to my sister.

However, since you now know that your sister is reading your posts here, I can appreciate that you wouldn't feel comfortable continuing to post.  My suggestion is that you leave the board - maybe even ask the Moderators to delete your previous posts - but then come back with a different screen name and without providing enough information so that you can be identified.  Many of us here keep our real identities private.  

I'm so sorry your sister has hurt you in this way.  

If you want to continue getting support here, why not start fresh with a new user name and don't include your picture, first name, or other identifying information? I think many women do this to ensure their privacy ... anyone can read the posts. (If you google your first name, town, and breast cancer, you'll find some of your posts.) You may also want to delete your previous posts (I'm assuming that's possible).

Hang in there!

Thanks Anandagram - I was a little worried that I would offend people ... but again ... that's why I'm so happy to have these boards.  If we need to spit, we spit.  If we need to be educated, there isn't a more experienced group of supporting women anywhere.  If we have any emotion at all - it's accepted with loving arms...

Oh man her sister has me ticked off.  That woman doesn't belong anywhere near a cancer patient - oh I believe in Karma....I'm justy shaking my head right now.  I have a seriously selfish nutjob of a person related to me - she took the nearest exit a long, long time ago....before cancer and before my BS tack hit red....

Ah...I'll edit myself for a second...;)

Pardon my expressing a negative opinion here, but your sister is a creep.  I agree with the kick her to the curb, wholeheartedly.  You really don't need people like that in your life, sister or not.  Perhaps she is a decent person who made a horrible mistake, but I am inclined to think she is a horrible person who made a typical mistake for one of her caliber. There are lines you don't cross.

Why ditch your sisters here, who have given you comfort and support, for a person like that?  Figure out what you did to have her find you, don't do that again, make another ID, and PM your friends about your new identity.

Wow, what a crappy thing for your sister to do. I agree with the other posters who have urged you to come back under a different handle. At the very least you can lurk for a few weeks and stay connected to the "sisterhood".

If it works with your schedule you might want to consider coming to the Boston area gathering on the 4th. The Boston area sisters will keep an eye out for stalker sis! 

Wow, that is soo very, very, very irritating.....This is what I would do.  I would get rid of the old you, and make a new you, with a new name and no recognizable picture of yourself.  That way, you can get the support you need without having to worry about what you have just experienced.  This would work! 

what a silly sister.

change your name and avatar pic.. ask the mods for help but stay. this forum is too invaluable.  (as others have said).. I hope your sister reads your post tho.  There is such a thing as civility and support.

Tho pretty much everyone knows me as apple across the interwebs, i initially chose 'apple' because it was so generic.

you could be 'babybanana' or something, altho i kind of like 'mysistersux' or something.  just kidding. 

I'm sorry you are dealing with this carp.  I do love my sisters but have one that is absolutely high maintenance and hateful.. i spend all my time soothing her issues and her nerves and her her her.. with her, it's all about me, her me.

You know, I'm wondering while she was snooping on you whether your sister stopped to look around at all the other women whose lives have been turned upside down by this lousy disease and stop to think that, gee, cancer IS a big scary f*^#$g deal. Or that... someday it could be her.

I'm so sorry you ran into negative reactions so quickly as you've had to get used to your diagnosis, especially from a sister, who should be there for you no matter what. I wish you only the best.

So sorry that this has happened people just dont get it our lives have been turned upside down by this cancer S--- and all the can seem to do is think about themselves, not how every day we are fighting for our lives and sanity. Why did she feel the need to invade on the one place, where we can vent every emotion within  us and not be judged,  we can find answers to questions about or disease and treatments that we have from someone who has walked thru it not just on the side line speculating or guessing,also where we can celebrate our acheivements and get genuine support when all H--- breaks loose so to the sisters, mothers , husbands , kids, friends, who are not here to support us but here to spy on us and use it against us you are not welcome here and you are less than a human being to come and attack us at our lowest point in some of our lives and maybe we should start exposing you all for doing this put your names in big bold print for everyone to see and call you out.  Because we should not feel bad for what we put on this board this belongs to us. E ven though we dont want to be here but we are and we need each other to get thru this so dont run us away form the one place we can find what we need you can visit but dont bother or confront us but help us . Hopefully if you should ever need  a place like this it will be there for you .Sorry for such a long post but this just irks me how people are so insensitive to us and our needs.  But most of all Kayce234 dont leave it only gives her power that she dont deserve .

I have a kind of similar take on this BUT don't let her run your recovery!!! Stay here on the boards and be who you are. Why should you delete yourself from the safest place on earth?? SHE cannot tell you what you can and cannot post and tell her that her feedback is not acceptable because you didn't ask for it!!! My sister once tried to tell me what my therapy should be and she was WAY off!!! She didn't understand about hormone recpetors or anything. She was just spewing at the mouth because one of her friends had done a certain treatment.

Do NOT let your sister ruin who you are to us. WE need you! Tell her to fcuk off and mind her bloodry business that this is YOUR place not hers. She will get sick of responding to every post you make and will hopefully read all these posts about what a friggin' busybody she is and how she is SO not welcome here!!

Pleaese, please, stay here for US! If not yourself......

Barbe - always such a pleasure to read your posts

Um...I wouldn't want that crazy whack job on these boards.  She can figure out how to have a brain and a heart on her own.  I'm in a situation now where it's totally irritating to think that I HAVE TO TEACH THEM ... this is my time, honey.  If you haven't figured out how to be a decent human being by now ... you're not my problem...

Oh geez ... but, it feels great to be able to let this all out ...

Kayce, I'm so sorry this happened to you! Please send us a PM if we can help you with this. Anyone else reading this and being concerned too, remember you can very easily change your user ID, or edit your posts to remove personal info.

None of us can be responsible for what others do (or why they do it!), but if someone in the family, or at work decides to go searching, we can all make it harder for them to find members here. From a post about discussion board security:

Help keep our Community safe by not submitting personally identifiable information in Posts and Topics.  Below are some useful tips:

• Don't use your real name, recognizable nickname, addresses, phone numbers, kids' names
• All posts and screen names are searchable by Google and other internet search engines
• Don't use your photo as your avatar if you don't want to be recognized
• Use the PM feature to share personal information with other members (PMs aren't searchable)

Judith and the Mods

I Love our Moderators.



HIP HIP HORRAY!!!

BTW Kayce---there is a special place in hell for people like your sista....sorry to be so blunt but i have people like her in my family....

Listen to Barb.....xoxoxo sista.