soya again

Please don't beat yourself up that you are somehow "to blame" for bc.  Yes, that thought crossed my mind after I was first diagnosed.  And then I came to learn how widespread bc is, that all kinds of women, and to a lesser extent men, get this disease.  Young, old, those who've taken good care of themselves and those who haven't; rich, poor, thin, fat, those who've born children and those who haven't, no matter where we live in the world and no matter the color of our skin.

There is no benefit in looking back and saying "what if?"  Even if there was a point, we will never know which things were what made a difference.  And even if we could know which things made the difference, a whole bunch of them might have been out of our control.

But...there is a benefit in looking forward.  There are things that may increase risk, that are worth controlling.  There are things that may increase risk, but aren't worth controlling (they may just make you sane and have just a tiny impact on risk).  There are things that may not have any impact on risk of bc, but changing them help you by putting your body in such a good place that it is easier to deal with the treatments.

You just do the best you can...there are no right answers in life...no answer key.  You just do the best you can.  And let go of the rest...:)

That's my way of coping with it all, anyway.  I agree with the ladies here...no sense in beating yourself up...life is so much more pleasant when you don't.:)

Well, of course, life gets put on hold.  And gets reprioritized.  And the stupid crap gets ditched.  And the important stuff gets put to the fore.  My dx was low grade, stage 0 and it was such a small area that the stereotactic biopsy actually removed it all before I got to the mx.  I feel lucky that I don't have to do rads or chemo.  But, he!!, I lost a breast and a lymph node and remain at higher risk on the other side.  We are completely justified in being pissed, scared, frustrated, angry and everything else.  Someone on bc.org quoted someone with Stage IV cancer as saying that the worst thing that has ever happened to you is the worst thing that has ever happened to you.  There is no comparing pain.  There is no comparing fear.  Pain is pain, fear is fear.  Give yourself the room and space to feel all the feelings.  It helps to be able to do that and accept them for what they are...reasonable in this craziness.

I have removed all processed foods from my diet...the most processed food I eat is organic nonfat yogurt.   I eat an almost vegetarian diet and eat no animal fats whatsoever.  There is no processed soy.  There is no alcohol.  I eat next to zero sugar.  I feel way better.  I have lost 50 pounds (slowly over 5 years), dropped my cholesterol from 230 to 130 and got control of the COPD (chronic lung disease)I was diagnosed with  4 years ago.  I exercise 300 minutes per week, 180 are high intensity.

I imagine that most people I know are saying...and she does all the right things and got cancer anyway, what is the point?  I know that I weathered my mx better because of it and I suspect that my cancer might not have been so early if I'd been doing all the high risk behaviors.  But, like I said before, there is no point in looking back...just ahead...and you do what you can and don't worry about the rest, right?

I use fruit.  My oatmeal in the morning is with blueberries.  No other sweetener.  I have plain yogurt, with nuts and seeds and raisins.  No sweetener.  I just weened myself off.  I do allow myself a square of 90% chocolate each night (2.5g of sugar) and put a dried apricot on top of it.  I also allow myself sweet things as planned on special occasions.  A tiny piece of cake at each of my kids birthdays.  A slice of low sugar pumpkin pie at Thanksgiving and a scoop of ice cream on vacation in the summer in Cape Cod.  That's it for the year. 

I do eat lots of sugars, as found in fruit.  They are just not refined.  No processed anything was my rule. 

The key to  it for me was I changed over very gradually.  When I first started, I used maple syrup in my oatmeal.  I reduced it over time until I just eliminated it altogether.  Everything was very gradual.

I eat dairy, so long as it is fat free and organic.  No rBGH for me...for years.  My son drinks almond milk, as he is allergic to milk.  But it has so much sugar added.  I eat egg whites, but no yolks.  I started out vegan, and added each of these back in over time as they made me feel better.  I just listened to my body.  There are things I have tried adding back in, and my body said no...like bread and bagels and other refined flour products.  The last thing I have added back in was lean turkey meat...and it made me feel wonderful.  So I eat that 1 to 2 times per month.

 I guess I eat the "listen to my body" diet...  It is the first time in my life that my weight is under control without my needing to try.  It is the first time in my life that I know what makes me feel good and what doesn't.  I am very proud of the changes I have made.  But, again, they were really gradual...my cousin says that the way I did it shows that I am very kind to myself.  That made me feel good.:)