I'm so scared!!!!

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felly
felly Member Posts: 12
edited June 2014 in Not Diagnosed With a Recurrence or Metastases but Concerned

Hello Ladies! I'm writing for the first time on this site..although I've been watching it really close for about a year now..and I have gained lot of strength from all of you...and I'd like to  thank you for that.

My name is Felly,I'm 34 y old and was diagnosed with bc in November 2011.The docs thought at first that it was a fibroadenoma and the biopsy came out negative....but the second biopsy results(after they removed a 2.6cm tumour) was positive (dcis & idc grade 3,ER+ PR-,HER negative  with no node involvement).TThere wasn't anything that could indicate cancer..not even blood markers..

See...I'll always remember that day.....it was my birthday ...I was about to get married...and I was feeling so grateful for life...until that day.....that ruined everything.At first I didn't want to believe it...I still don't.....my friends,family and my fiance were there for me all the time,,,,,and they were devastated....although I always thought it was a medical false....I didn't have many choices other than starting treatment....so I started AC chemo....did only 3 rounds..I coundn't handle any more due to dysanexia to the meds....I also had 28rads and refused tamoxifen.

And now....a year later..I'm going to have a mamography and some other tests done ..and I'm terrified.....I can't go through this again....

I'm sorry if I've been dramatic.........I can't help it.........

God bless you all! 

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  • BarbaraA
    BarbaraA Member Posts: 7,378
    edited October 2011

    {{{HUGS}}} We all know the scanxiety! I still get it. In fact i have a mammo coming up in two weeks. Trying not to worry until it gets closer. All I can offer you are hugs and encouragement!

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  • felly
    felly Member Posts: 12
    edited October 2011

    Thank you Barbara...so much :)) Μy mammo is scheduled in 2 weeks also....Wishing all the best for you :)) Ηugs!! 

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  • bcisnofun
    bcisnofun Member Posts: 488
    edited October 2011

    felly - how many rounds did your doc want you to do of AC?  Most people have 4, so you did get through most of them. 

    We have a different dx and I did do Tamoxifen so I can't feel exactly what you are going through but I understand the worry and anxiety.  I used xanax during my initial diagnosis to keep me from freaking out, and it was very helpful.  I took just a half a pill but it took the edge off.  Could something like that help as you wait this 2 weeks out?

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  • MJLToday
    MJLToday Member Posts: 2,068
    edited October 2011

    It is a horrible waiting game.  I think it is very common to have PTSD after a cancer diagnosis, especially one so young in life. 

    Anti-anxiety meds do help many people during intense periods of anxiety.  Have you thought about going to a counselor to discuss your anxiety?  Sometimes there are simple techniques to help people deal with this.

    Best wishes on your mammo.

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