August 2011 rads

shays37 - Chemo kicked my butt!  I had 4 AC treatments (every 3 weeks) which were the WORST!  I was in bed for days 3-5 after each, lost 20 pounds, basically didn't eat for 3 months, lost my hair (of course), had my WBC down to 0 a few times (managed to stay out of the hospital by the grace of God), and major chemo brain and basically felt like I was being poisoned to death. 

Then I had 12 weekly treatments of taxol - not as bad as AC, but didn't gain any weight back, had no appetite, lost all my eyelashes and eyebrows, lost 2 toe nails, almost lost 4 more fingernails, had major hot flashes and pretty bad bone pain towards the end and MAJOR Taxol depression mixed with anxiety! 

It was so much fun - Ha!  But praise God I made it through it and it's a little like childbirth - or maybe it was the chemo brain, but I seem to be forgetting how bad it was already

So far I am breezing through radiation - I'm going for #20 today.  I have 8 more after today then just the boosts.  I use Fruit of the Earth pure aloe on put it on liberally 4-5 times per day.  It's sticky and yucky but if it works, I'm all for it!  I think we are all different and our skin type/color makes a difference.  (I have olive Italian skin - but not very dark - but tan easily).  Also, my RO told me that thin women (I'm 5'8" and weigh 125-130) usually don't have as much skin effects b/c the radiation goes right through - or something like that?!?  Oh - and also, I have not worn a bra since I started rads (I wear tight camisoles under my shirts - with the liners from my swim suits put in there to keep the girls who stand at attention all the time under wraps).  I am lucky with that - I know some girls have to wear bras b/c of their size.  I am actually large breasted, but have a tiny rib cage - my custom fitted bras are 28G - no kidding - but if I buy at the department store I can work with a 32D or DD.  Somehow the girls are still perky enough that I can get away with just a camisole and liners (I'm 41)

Good luck to all starting, in the middle, finishing or whatever.  Big hugs of encouragement to all!

sweetcorn, you are halfway there.  Congrats!

My visit went fine today, just routine.  Onc said I will see him once a week.  I forgot to ask about deodorants that are safe.  I made the mistake of coming home and putting my regular under both pits.  Rut Roh!  Found out really quick that was a bad plan!  Any suggestions would be appreciated!

For me, 3 down, just 30 to go!  Hurray!

justmejanis: I go for #3 this afternoon. I am also 3 down, 30 to go! So far no redness, no irritation, nothing. I hope it will continue!

 Sarah 

Thanks, I felt like I was being ant tortured or something worse. Much better now.

By next Friday I will be done! I have to tell you I am dragging ass to the finish line hear gals LOL

Does anyone else have thoughts like " why was I allowed to live while other's did not?"

It makes me feel like I have some mission or something, just havn't figured out what yet.

Janis you are so right. Tons of soul searching in this process and every emotion under the sun. Glad to hear I am not the only one.

Merilee---Yes. I have those thoughts frequently.

@ justmejanis. I am a little achy tonight in the armpit, but nothing bad. No redness yet. I saw the RO today (will see him every Thursday). He was pleased so far. I also got my appt changed to the mornings (was3:30 and will be 9:10 starting next week). This will be much more convenient, as I have kids to get off the bus/homework/stuff in the afternoons. I will go to the gym and then right to rads and then home. Today was a busy day.....1st day of school (have one in 10, 7th, 5th) rads this afternoon, my youngest had an appt and then home to start dinner, etc. PHEW! 

sarabob....WOW!  You sure have a busy schedule.  My "baby" is 32 and lives in Colorado.  No kids here for ages.  I am glad you got your appointment time changed to fit your schedule better.  I go every morning at 9:30 so not too bad.  I get up very early, so I could go earlier bit that was the time slot they had open.  I think I will see my RO every Thursday as well. 

The side effects you listed sound kind of scary.  So far I am good, but I do have that sunburn thing going on today.  A bit sore.  This too shall pass.

Kate....everything sounds great for you!  I hope you get through all this with very few problems!  Hang in there and please stay with us.

Always...hugs! 

If  I were doing rads over again I would try to schedule them right before bed time.

Today is my last treatment! I am a "free" woman after 1000. I will be free from going everyday. I am seeing the skin nurse in 1 week because you peak with skin reactions 1 week post rads.

Merilee you bring a real good thought to this board. Why us? How will this change us for the better? For me I told my husband at the beginning that God gave me cancer so I can help someone else through the journey. I didn't think it would be so soon. As you know my sister had an excisional bilateral breast bxs yesterday. I am extremely worried for her but do not tell her. I know so much more now then pre-cancer. I have been very helpful to her with suggestions. Her results come in Tuesday. You probably don't know this but I am a pediatric nurse that has the pleasure of working with cancer kids. How has my cancer experience changed me? God I hope I am a better nurse for those kids and their families! I didn't ask God for cancer but I am going to use this experience to make a better person of me.

sarahbob-Yes those side effects can happen in a very few number of patients. I think I was quoted 1-4%. It is dose dependent. In other words the more rad to your lungs, the better chance of possible having a problem. My co-worker's mom who went through rads in the last 2 years did get rads pneumonitis. It was easily treated with antibiotics. With all these treatments we all weighed the pros (decrease chance of a recurrance) and the cons (long term side effects or medically termed long term toxicity). We all will have rad fibrosis (scar tissue) when we are done. We won't notice it in day to day life but if we ever need a chest xray it will show up. Again this was mentioned during my initial appointment. I saw 2 RO before starting treatment with my 2nd one. I also had my husband along and wrote notes. This helped when I finally made the decision. But now I can refer back to the notes and let you know what was mentioned to me. 

If I went back to the time before I started rads and was able to change anything, I would tell my self that rads was not as bad as I imagined. It was very doable. Alot of people come through with minimal SE. And what SE there are, the doctors and nurses are on top of them and have treatments to help. Ladies just starting please keep this in mind. These boards sometimes highlight the people that have severe problems. Not many people tell you that it is doable and you will get through it!

So sorry for rambling but it is the anticipation of being done in 4 hours. I am so happy but kinda sad. Can you believe that??

Well I am about to start mine.  We are suppose to be direct hit for the hurricane.  I got through chemo I heard Radiation is not so bad.  I start my real thing on Sept 1.  I just want this all over with.  Hope everyone has a nice weekend.  Ours will be nice and wet.

BTW, yesterday was 6 months since my surgery and 8 months sicne my dx. WOW! How my life has changed in the last 8 months! I was thinking last night (as I was rubbing aloe gel on my boob stump) that a year ago, I had no clue how drastically my life was about to change. 

bb226:  Congratulations on finishing today.  I had that strange mixture of joy and sadness when I finished chemo, but when I finished rads, all I felt was joy.  I hope your joy will be abundant, too.

Merilee:  Best of luck with your new life away from work.  I think everyone is at peace and deeply satisfied when they follow their gut feelings.