February 2011 chemo pals

DIVINE, I'm glad that little unfortunate episode is OVER.  Gosh, that was tough.

JEN, I loved your story about your Cairn terrier.  Husband said the other day we should go on to smaller dogs when the two we got go.  He was SO wanting another German Shepherd Dog, me too, and I had been trying hard to get myself back in good physical shape, so I could give a GSD the exercise he needs.  But after dealing with Gandalf, our sick Husky, I'm feeling like husband now.  A few days ago, I fell, one of many times lifting the dog, but managed to crash my lower spine against the drawer pull in our TV cabinet, it still hurts like hell, as if I didn't already have enough going on with my back.  SIGH.  But I'll keep up with exercise, just as soon as this cancer gets outta here.

JENNH, RUFFOLO, SPECIALK, AND DOGEYED (me).....is that now the gang that has surgery August 2-3, or near those dates?  I will send up a special prayer to the Good Shepherd that we all do well, which I already know I will be fine, my inherited premonitions are all "GO" for surgery.  It's the one thing I've wanted since the beginning.  I cannot recall if I mentioned that this is my third week out from last Taxol, and the inflammatory breast cancer symptoms are returning, just like I KNEW it would, in fact doc and I agreed surgery should be one to two weeks out, but scheduler "didn't get the memo."  But my boob was in much worse shape with my initial scans, no spread, so I imagine I'm safe.  Bye for now!  GG 

Clinical IBC & Biopsy IDC, Adenopathy
Diagnosis: 2/14/2011, IDC, 5cm, Grade 3

Dogeyed -Before my Cairn, I was the proud mama of three majestic Akitas. When they went to Heaven, I waited three years before I could commit. I wanted big dog personality in a size that would fit in my laundry sink. Went to check out a new litter of Cairns and met Rowdy. He was the last remaining pup of an older litter. He was (and still is) the one.



And i will also say a special prayer for the August sisters!

I hope surgery has gone well for those that had it today! I'm thinking about you!

I have two more days of rads left. I'm so excited to be done! I got my script for tamoxifen today.......I'm not looking forward to it, but hoping that it's not too bad. 

Melanie Ann, good luck with the Tamoxifen.  I started taking it Sunday and it doesn't seem to have really altered anything for me after just a few doses.  Hope it continues like this.  You're in my prayers.

Surgery went fine, had some trouble staying overnight, wound up asking to be discharged before 8pm because they weren't giving me my medicines in time.  As you know, we had to put our beautiful dog down the day before surgery, and yesterday since I got home early and we hadn't had much time to mourn dog, husband and I happily reviewed a lot of his old pictures stored on the computer, made me calm right down. 

My wound is leaking a little, hurt it when I woke up and gurney girls from recovery told me to get over to my bed and offered no assistance for my mastectomy side, which we're not supposed to move our arm, but I was so drugged up, I didn't say anything until it really started to hurt and bleed all over the place.  Ye gads.  Got pain medicine right away after that, but it wasn't until I called front desk at 7pm three times that they said it would be two more hours before I got my meds.  I dressed, demanded they pull my I.V., and said I'd get my own medicine at home when I wanted to, and I knew how to take care of my bandages and drains, whatever it took to get the heck outta there, I was mad.

I then called my breast surgeon's nurse this morning, got more advice on caring for my wound, set up appointment to get drains out next week, she'd give me doc's followup appointment then, and I asked for pain control discharge medicine be called into my pharmacy, so husband can get that filled and pick up all my regular medicines. Nurse said something about Medicare might not cover surgery becuz I "left against medical advice," but when mother called down there, they said, "discharged at such and such time."  I left becuase of "NO medical advice"!!!  See, they didn't give me my noontime regular meds that include help wtih panic disorder....i could go on and on, like one of my front teeth was knocked out during anesthesia, not too shocking, they've been breaking away piece by piece since some awful med I was on five years ago, but still....,   

Hope everybody else does a little better than me, but I will say this, I am SO glad to get that boob off of there, was driving me plumb crazy.  That's the main thing.  Always, GG

Thanks for all the well wishes for surgery, I'm on the mend and feeling better, just very anxious and nervous for the results. It is what is will be but Im really hoping margins are clear this time and I wont have to go back for another surgery. I want to get started on rads. Who ever could imagine wanting to start radiation? Congrats Mel on finishing up your rads and everyone elses encouraging stories, thank you- it's good to know that it's doable.

Dogeyed, I hope you're hanging in ok. I'm thinking of you and sending you hugs.

I don't know if it's the aneasthetic or me being anxious for results or what but I'm so sad today, I'm tired, I'm worried. I want good news, I want to move foward. I'm just having a moment I guess. just needed to let it out to girls I know will understand. Thanks for being there feb girls.

MamaV - rads hasn't been to terrible for me either.  Hopefully you have an easy-ish time as well!  I'm 26/33 (28 whole breast and 5 boosts) and I have minor blistering in the axilla that looks like it should hurt like HECK but it's completely painless (I'm not numb from surgery at all).  Breast is dark pink but doesn't hurt or itch.

Dogeyed - Healing prayers for you!!

Melanie - so glad you didn't have any horrible SE in rads.  Some ladies really, really suffer!

Thank you divine mrs m. I truly appreciate it. I'm trying not to worry to much, (it's not working) im glad your reexcision went well for you. You must be relieved.I'm taking my daughter out shopping for some retail therapy, hoping That should help distract me a bit.

Hope everyone is having a good day.

RUFFOLO, I so sad you are sad.  I want you to be happy, you got rid of the cancer on you!  Did they not give you some pain killers, they will make you feel good, call your doc if you need to, hon, I don't want you to feel sore.  I mean, when you think about it, while we sleep long and deep thru surgery, them docs is going thru all sorts of stuff, every textbook they ever read is being pulled from for those intense hours of work, and our bodies receive all this without our knowing, so we go thru a lot and will be tired and cry and not know why.  I just hope you don't have to deal with work or anyting else, you need to just stay home and play for a while.  I'm glad you are going to shop, tho, I hope you find something nice to take home.  Bye for now, girlfriend!  GG

Congrats Mel and thanks for the encouragement. I started tamoxifen two weeks ago - feel no different so far!



Pejkug thanks to you too. I am going for #6 today. So far easy and no skin changes. Am I just going to wake up one day fried or is it gradual?

My skin got pretty irritated at about treatment number 26 or so...But then I started boosts such a couple of days later and it quieted down really fast. And I won't say that it was really painful..just a little bit itchy and sensitive. I've just started to feel some fatigue this past week.

MamaV- I'm encouraged by your progess on tamoxifen. I've probably been reading too much. Everything I read on here pretty much makes it sound like a nightmare. I hope that's not the case for me. I plan to really get back into exercise though so I'm hoping that regulates my moods..possible weight gain and such. It will be nice to keep each other posted since we started so close together. 

Still sending hugs and strength to the girls who had recent surgery (Ruffalo1, Special K, Dogeyed, Jenn H).

Dogeyed - so sorry to hear about Gandolf.  I know he was so very special.

Melanie Ann, Mama V and Divine - I joined the Tamoxifan club yesterday.  I too was worried about all of the bad things that I heard.  Guess we will just have to wait and see.

To those girls who are finishing rads, I hope that time goes by quickly for you and also that the rads do the trick!

Finally - I have a dear friend named Becky who had breast cancer before (stage IV) and she thinks she may have it again.  She had chemo, rads, hysterectomy and diep about 5 years ago.  Please keep her in your prayers so that she doesn't have to go through all of this again.  My heart aches for those who have to do this once, but more than once is too much to bear.   Love to you all~ 

Thanks SpecialK and everyone for your positive thoughts and prayers. My surgeon got clear margins this time she called me this morning with the path results. There was 2 mm invasive ca found but she got an 11mm margin and 2 mm dcis which she got a 5 mm margin. Surgeon is Very happy, I'm relieved to move foward. The surprise of having cancer still in my breast at re excision kind of scares me, but margins are clear, radiation will help, and I need to think positive. I guess thats why she went back in - what a long strange trip this is becoming. Thanks everyone for your support. I was feeling pretty low both physically and mentally after the anesthetic but am on the mend. you girls are great. And I hope everyone has a beautiful weekend.

Glad to hear from some of my surgery sisters that things are going well...Good news sara!

Sorry about your pup GG, what a sad time to lose him!

My surgery went well, actually my throat hurts more than anything else (I think the tube must have nicked it or something). I saw my onc. the day before and he explained that I actaully have two different breast cancers, each side is a seperate incident, very rare and strange (again, leave it to me). I guess I will find out more when I go see surgeon for follow up from surgery. I'm not sure I really want to talk about all those "numbers". I mean, I realize I will be at a high stage and all that but even if there is a 80% chance of recurrence, someone has to be in the 20% part right?!

I go on Thur for results SpecialK...kind of nervous about going. Not sure I want to know.