Starting Chemo Aug 09

Penny - we are thinking of you and your Mom.

I took mom to her BS appt today and he is not convienced that its either a new lump of concern or scarring. So we wait 3 more months or unless it continues to grow. He told mom that he will take it out if she wants to have it out. But due to her being on blood thinners its not always as easy as it sounds. So again its left up to my mother. She has decided to wait. She was hoping I wouldnt be upset sence she promised me that if it was still there and has some changing to it she would have it out. I told her this is her body. Im her to support whatever decision she makes.

I just dont get how one dr will say. Do you want to wait and see what it does? (BS) or (ONCO) I want it out.  Which way is right. ? The scan wasnt the best but it could have been worse. They did find something in her esophagus (spelling), they want her to go for a endoscopy. aorta anyrusm has grown to 3.4 form 3.0 in 3 months. (still we wait)  for what?? and the new development with the nodule on the MX side which they see some sort of growth or somthing in her chest wall.

Its hard just waiting. I know we all dont get the answers we want in the time we want them, but its getting old hearing "lets wait and see".

I have to call her reg dr and see who he recommends for the endoscopy. She isnt pleased with that at all. I see all of this is starting to get to her. Am I being to pushy? I just want to make sure that I have her around for a long time. She has never told me that I was. I dont know. I just feel like maybe I am and she just wants me to let it be.

Now that I have put more things in my head to worry about. I will close this and go to bed. Tomorrow is a new day. Hugs to you all

Hello Ladies I am new to this posting but I had chemo in Aug of 2009 and I was wondering if anyone is having problems with pain from Femara?  I have so much pain and tiredness I had to stop working

Stopping in to wave hello to everyone.  Moyar-No advise to share since I am TN and do not have to take femara.  Hugs to you and all who are having SEs.

Navy

Update on my mom.

we saw my moms reg dr today. He didnt have much to say about the new develments on my nodule. He did see to it that she get the endoscopy sence she hasnt had any heartburn or acid reflux, but claim they see a hinal herna. (sorry about the spelling). She has a really bad cough if she lays flat at night and has bad sinus drippage at night, to the point it leaves spots on her pillowcase. So her dr wants to check it out. Im happy about that. Her BS and reg dr agree that at this point if she is ok with waiting 3 more months to see what develpes with the lump than that is what they will do. We have yet to see her onco and I know what he will say. He wants it out. I explained my fustration that none of her dr's can come up with a proper way to handle this. Why should it be left up to the patient to make  medical desions that she gets no guidence from? He did understand my fustration. But he did say its not his field and he has to leave that decision to her BS. So tomorrow I will make a appt with her onco. Mom is very scared that he will drop her due to she wont have the biospy. How do I explain to him that we need the dr's to all come to a understanding. Leaving the decison up to the paitent just isnt right. My fustration is turnig into anger, which isnt good. I did talk with my mom today and asked if If she felt that I was to pushy about her medical appts. She told me NO that she trust me and knows that Im only trying to do what is best for her. even thought she may not like it all the time. That made me feel good. I dont want to be a decision maker for her. I just want to support any and all of her decisions SHE makes. Well not sure if I actually asked any questions just pretty much vented. Thank you all for listing.

Penny- extremely fustrated by loves her mother to the moon and back!

Jenn, Yes it is the same side as her mx. She did just have her mamo on her right side and that turned out fine. Thank goodness. I will be calling her onco today to set up her appt. I am fustrated but cant let that show. Just like you said Lilah- Say it like I wrote it. Maybe my fustration is comming from more than all of this. Wait till you hear this story. Now mind you my mom is 76. Back in june 2009 when all this started, she and our family were dealing with many more issues. My sister was living with us who had mental health issues with suside attemts. I thought I could help her out but learned very quickly I was not able too. She stayed with us for about 8 months, during this time my mothers husband became very ill and we found that he had a tumor in his intestine the spread through out his body.  He ended up passing in dec of 2009. My father who was in a nursing home fell and broke his hip and he ended up passing in jan 2011. We were then told by my mothers husband (my step father) she had to leave the house that was in march of 2011. We then found out the her husband was in serious debt and opend many credit cards in his and her name that were all maxed out. Needless to say they are comming after her. In that time period my mother received a health insurance card from a company that she thought was hers. It had her name on it, only difference was the middle inital. (Her husband worked in insurance) so he handled all of that. No mind you she has been using this card sence 2009. Many times it was used for all her scans and procedures and dr. visits. I even at one point spoke to these people and gave SS numbers and birth date. Well when she went for her last PET scan 6/28/11 they told her there was something wrong with her birth date and it needs to be fixed. I thought just human error and we will deal with it the next day. They approved her PET and off we went. The next day I made a 3 way call with me, mom and the insurance co. Come to find out she was issued someone elses card. They tell us they have been looking for her and many claims against this acct. (ok corporate america- just how hard have you been looking) They told us this is a federal offence! They did say it helps that we called them.. Well I called her lawyer and told him what is going on and did he think she needed councel. He then told me yes. OMG.. can things get any worse! We now have a criminal lawyer handleing the case and we are no longer able to speak with the insurance co. And she maybe responible to pay restuation or go to jail! Can you all believe this. So now we wait. Im not sure how much more my mom can take. I dont see how this could be a federal offence if there was never INTENT.  That is a short version on how this is going. She is so scared she is going to jail. I will not let this happen. I handle all this on my own sence my brother and sister both live far away. I do keep my brother in the loop but say very little to my sister. Blahh. Ladies I ask for your prayers for my mom. she dosent need this now with all the other health concerns going on. Well its time to get ready for work so I must go. Hope everyone has a good day and at least here in NY the weather looks good for the weekend!

Penny

She is on medicare and she also has met life. I got a call from the lawyer today and he wants $250 per hour and $1000.00 retainer fee. She lives on SS and her retirement. I did talk with the lawyer for a counter suit for lawyer fees. He said he had to wait until he talks with all insurance companys before we can go there. This is just too much. I did call her onco and got her appt for 7/22. I want to call a do over. This day is just to much.

Jenn - The only person I know who got the bone cement for a back problem had absolutely no problem with it!  In fact after breaking her back three times and living in constant pain, the "cement" stopped the pain immediately.  It was like a miracle.  And she's over 80.  So you should do really well!

Penny - I am so sorry for all your mom's worries.  There are merits to each of the doctors' recommendations.  The "wait and see" point of view avoids potentially unnecessary surgery, which, with your mother's age and the blood thinners, could be a problem.  The "get it out now" point of view is more drastic but would end the worry if it is benign.  I don't think it is uncommon these days for doctors to present the alternatives and let the patient make the decision.  Both my surgeon and my oncologist did that when laying out my treatment options. I think you need to listen to the different expert points of view and then do what feels best to your mom and you. 

Moyarscs - Yep.  I've got the Femara aches.  Like Weety, I  have really stiff painful knees when I get up from sitting on the floor.  (Maybe I should use chairs...duh!)  My ankles and knees are also painful in the morning so I hobble around for a few minutes until they "warm" up.  Exercise, especially walking, really helps.  So does an Aleve or a Tylenol at bedtime.  I take the Femara pill at night.  That way any tireness it causes is put to good use!  I haven't noticed any tiredness during the day.  I've only gained 2 lbs since starting Femara about 15 months ago...but it is all stuck right on my waist!

Patty

Jenn,

I like that idea and I will use it when we see moms onco next friday as well as tell him just how we feel.

I hope you have a wonderful vacation. I love the beach too. We leave for 2 weeks in august. I cant wait. Its the one place where I can relax. I wish my mom would come with the family and I but she dosent like the heat or sun for long periods of time.

The lawyer called me yesterday just to get some updated info on my moms (real) inusrance and I did ask him for all copies of phone convos and letters that he writes. I want to know everything he is doing. I also asked him about a possible counter suit (for legal fees only) he said at this time we just dont know where all this is going, but he will keep the idea open. I feel bad for my mom with all the stresses and now this.

I hope you all have a fun and relaxing weekend.

Penny

Hello Everyone. Patty, I am holding a good thought thatyour MRI will be OK. 

Hang in there Jenn and Penny.

The fun just never seems to end for us.  I am going in for D & C this morning.  After 20 months of no periods I started bleeding last month.  Gyne tried to get endometrial BX in office but was unable to pass the catheter.  So I'm off for another surgical procedure.  1 in 10 chance that this will be cancer.  I busted out laughing (better than crying I suppose) when gyne told me that.  He is well aware that I flunked out when it came to the 1 in 8 statsfor BC.  So hoping the news is good.

Navy

Oh gee,  it never seems to end. . .  Navymom, hope your results are benign.

Unrelated note--I'm at my 2yr post diagnosis point today!  I don't know when to count the years, but I kind of feel like the diagnosis was the start of the whole cancer journey!

Weety -- wahoo on the 2 year mark!  My onc says she counts survival from end of chemo (not Herceptin)... so I'm on that 2 year mark in October (soon)!  No matter when you count it, though, it feels good putting distance between me and that initial diagnosis!  Yeah!

Navymom -- here's hoping the results are benign. 

Jenn -- great advice you gave to Penny.  And I'm sorry you have to stop your chemo till that doctor gets back... how long do you have to be off chemo before you can have the surgery?

Penny -- hope things go well with your mom's onc -- keep us posted!

Love it Patty -- that's the spirit!

Wow Donna yours came back after chemo? Mine did not.  Chemo killed it for good. I was regular as clockwork, too, prior to BC (which I got at age 49).  Are you much younger than that?  I actually don't mind not having it anymore LOL.