April 2011 chemo

Oh Suzy. This disease really does suck. I really feel for you, it's so disappointing when treatment is delayed and you just want to get it over and done with.



I too was hospitalized 5 days ago with an infection and no white blood cells to fight it. I somehow managed to go ahead with AC #4 on Tuesday.



In addition to feeling sorry for myself we are also having another family tragedy. My mums sister was admitted to hospital 3 days ago with double pneumonia, which led to a lung cancer diagnosis. In 3 short days they have just removed her IV and put her on morphine to manage the pain and assist her passing. My mum is desperately trying to get from Perth, Australia back to NZ in time. The earliest she can get here is 10am tomorrow. I hope and pray it's not too late. She will be devastated!

Sudz I had ceral for dinner tonight! How funny. It was good, and good for me and I'm full. So you go sista and do whatever it takes. Your girls will understand and can even help out. My 24 year old daughter has moved back in with me temporarily. She's in nursing school and working 2 jobs so I don't see her much. She broke up wth a boyfriend she was living with and needed to move back home. But I love having her company here and knowing I'm not alone. 

Thanks Rangermom. Got the news an hour ago that my Aunt just passed away. RIP.



I'll be happy to see the end of 2011.

Kiwi mom

 I can so relate to your pain. Some of you know I just lost my brother to Cancer a few weeks ago while going through this shit myself. I am so sorry for your loss and the extra fear that it brings. It is amazing when I read these threads how much we are all coping with in addition to this F-N cancer.

Ranger mom you sound like you are finding some peace with your situation and so glad to hear your daughter is there with you. One thing I have not mentioned is that I also did chemo last year and my marriage ended in the middle of that also. For me however it was a relief to have the ass hole out of my house. Don't know if you feel the same way but I have no regrets asking him to leave. I am however dependent on his health insurance so we are still married which I hate.

Also other people have bailed out of my life, and I have really had to do some thinking about what is next for me and my son.  There is no doubt that this is a life changing diagnosis, but for me it is chin up, boobs out ( wait, make that chest LOL) and march forward. Nothing else will work.

So glad to have this support network here, it has been a life and sanity  saver for me.

Thank you so much for your encouraging words.

Kiwimum -- I am SO sorry to hear about your aunt.  And Merilee -- SO sorry to hear about your brother.  Geez....how much can a person take while going through all this sh*t?!  It's not fair.  But, as you said, Merilee -- it's so good to have this support network -- so many people going through the same thing.  We can all feel each other's pain.  And yup, we just gotta put the chin up and boobs (or lack thereof) out and march on.  RangerMom -- good advice on saying something nice each day, which in turn makes us feel good.  

Merilee, you're funny

I too will be happy to see the end of 2011.. I had my son deployed this year, lost both my parents within 6 months of each other, watched my dad have a horrible time with Chemo, and pass away and found out I would start Chemo right after I burried him...  My son in law was diagnosed with thyroid cancer, and his dad is dying from bone/lung... So its been a cancer packed year, good riddens to 2011!!!!!  I also have to say its been an awaking for me, and I will never be the same as far as how I feel about this disease and how much we need more work in this field to be done!  I watched the movine Living Proof about Herceptin, and I have to say it made me thankful for the medicine, in the early 80s it would have been a death sentence....  So although it was emotional it made me thankful.... 

Ginger_mea -- I'm so sorry it has been such a terrible year for you -- too much tragedy in one year.  My heart aches for you.

I'm sorry it has been so tough for everybody this year.  It's hard enough dealing with the BC and SEs, but to add all of the other things so many of you are having to deal with is just unfathomable.  I'm thinking of you all.

Teckler2 -- I haven't had the eye twitching, but I've had a problem with blurry vision and watery eyes.  I asked my onco the other day if chemo affects vision, and he said it definitely can because every square inch of the body has been bamboozled and bombarded.  He said now is not the time to go to the eye doctor because it should be a temporary thing and should dissipate once the chemo is over.  I hope he's right because it's very aggravating.

Hang in there everybody.  Hoping for a relaxing weekend for everybody. 

hey everyone. quick ?. could not get blood return using my port yesterday so now i am scheduled for them to look at or redo my port? my chemo was delayed greatly b/c of this. my appt was at 10 (for the first taxol) and i did not get leave there until after 3:30. anyone have this experience, not w/ delay, but with the port? aside from the obvious of having it re-done, what can i expect? was anyone luck enough not to have it redone after concerns?

thanks.

Hi all. Boy am I aching after my Taxol and neulasta. Feel like I've been run over so I'm staying in bed today. STill very sad about my SO leaving. He was diagnosed with prostate ca right before me and we've been going through this together. he was very good to me so yes, I miss him very much. I think he was struggling with his own issues after the surgery he had. I just don't know for sure anything.

hey carla b. thanks for responding. they did give me a shot of that solution you mentioned, but only once. they prob should have tried again. i am just dread having to have the port surgery again. damn.

@merilee ...i need 11 more. 12 taxols total and fri was my first one.

Determined, you are in my prayers that the port can still be used.

I'm so sorry to hear that so many of you are going through some very tough times on top of your own diagnosis and Chemo side effects.  Not Fair!  This is my "good week".  It amazes me how I forget the yucky feeling once I'm in week # 3.  I almost feel like my old self.  It's wonderful.

Sarah, I too get very weepy and now I'm making the connection that this happens right after I go off the steroids.  I thought it was the chemo.  I cry when I'm telling others about something nice that someone did for me.  It just comes out of no where???

My eyes are a mess... blurry vision, extremely watery.  But we do have to wait until after this is all done to see an eye doc. (same with our teeth)

Sue53- I also thought that my 3rd chemo knocked me out but I haven't had # 4 just yet???

My onc did not talk about Taxol after my 4th (and final) T/C treatment.  I wonder if I should be having this chemo too.  I'll have to ask him (not that I want more but I am Triple Negative so I want to do all I can to kick this stuff out of me). 

I'm supposed to go in for my Radiation CAT Scan on July 5th and get my tattoos.  Has anyone had that scheduled yet?  I need to read up on radiation now so I know what to expect.  I hear it's easier than chemo but that there are side effects with it too. 

I just started to do some upper body exercises lately and found that my side under my arm is very sore.  I guess I need to stretch more.  It didn't hurt at all before this.  I wonder if it's scar tissue?

Good luck to you all.  I'm alone through this (not really - lots of supportive friends and family, just no man in my life and I'm fine with that but I'm sure it's hard when they have been there in the past) and have grown stronger because of it.  You can do it!

I hate to hear that you're all going through such hell in ADDITION to the usual cancer hell.  I'm so sorry. 

I've had 12 Taxols without a port.  No problems.  My nails are all turning brown and are killing me, but that's just the latest.  Oy.  BUt I didn't have any Neulasta. 

Hang in there friends.