June 2011 A/C & T Groupies Unite!

Hi Bobbie Jo, Thanks for starting this thread.  Well I'm getting my port wed and will start my A/C next wed.  Getting more and more nervous as it gets closer..I really haven't let myself cry too much (only in the shower..is my rule) figured I don't want my kids upset...but I have been very emotional this week..I guess it is the fear of the unknown...well that is why these boards are so important to us all..no one else can understand our "language" and it's helpful to vent sometimes too!! thanks again

bobbiejo - I just popped over to say "way to go" for starting this thread.  You will find the mutual support from people on the same chemo cocktail to be a great help!  See you around on the other boards!

Thanks, Bobbie Jo.  I have 4 rounds each of AC and T, every 2 weeks.  I had my first AC this past Wed and I've been wiped out.  My infusion itself was not bad.  I think I was wired from the steroids and I made a friend so I spent most of it talking and laughing.  I don't think it's going to be quite so fun later!  I was feeling sorry for myself today, feeling SO tired.  I'm honestly not sure what to expect!  I can't keep from crying in front of the kids, though I really try to manage it so as to not scare them.  My 10yo is on the autism spectrum and I'm not sure what she gets.  She did ask me Saturday, before she left for the weekend, if I was done with this 'weird stuff' yet.  Something is getting in there.  I know it can't be easy for them to see me sleeping a lot.  My 7yo has been giving me lots of hugs.  She's surprised when she sees tears on my face.  I explained to her that the medicine will make me tired and hurt for a while then it will be done.  She seems to accept that.  I found when I pushed myself it backfired on me.  I simply need the rest!  I've been needing 2 naps a day; I'm like an infant.  I was sobbing to my husband earlier and he sort of chuckled and said of course you are tired!!  You're getting chemo!  The Dr told you you'd be tired, etc.  Yeah, well, it's still hard to accept being sort of helpless.  My husband is really stepping up to the plate though.  

I feel like Mr Burns from the Simpsons.  I feel so weak.  Not what I expected.  I had a hard time plugging into one of those safety outlets---that really pissed me off.  lol  I have been walking the past 3 days.  It's slow, but I did walk over 2 miles this evening.  I find I have more energy in the evenings.  I start PT for my mastectomy pain tomorrow.  I've been able to prepare my own simple things to eat and church is delivering dinner twice per week while I'm on chemo.

I didn't answer the phone calls from the infusion office today!   She left a nice message checking on me and hoping she wouldn't hear from me, but to call if I had questions or issues.  

I'm shaving my head into a long mohawk later this week, or weekend.  I'm going to let my girls and nephews color it, too.  I need to make a party of it!  Port goes in next Monday.   

I finished my first round of a/c yesterday and so far so good. Was very tired yesterday but that could of also been from lack of sleep the night before. Overall feeling good. I am off to feeling food looking good today and then my shot. thinking of you all

We can all get through this together! It is nice to have support of people who know what it is really like. Feeling off today - minor flu like symptons - but could be worse. Very tired and bad knee pain. You are all in thoughts! Praying for minimal SE for all of us!

Bobbie Jo, my daughter is high functioning on the spectrum but not aspergers.  I'm blessed to have awesome teachers for her.  She spends a couple hours a day outside the classroom.  She's made great strides this year with writing (putting pencil to paper) and is finally at grade level reading.  She's graduated from speech therapy but still meets with the teacher for language/social skills.  I think all her medical issues (deaf left ear!  severe seasonal allergies!) helped me to to be a great advocate for her, in turn making me a better advocate for myself now.  Thanks for asking.  I think most special ed teachers are a blessing.  I am a grateful parent.

I was reading some more about the A.  I think I was under the illusion it wasn't the ass kicker that it is.  It's hard not to compare myself to others.  But take heed:  don't do it!  I think even just yesterday i was trying to be superwoman.  Now I feel more accepting that it's going to be hard but I CAN GET THROUGH IT.  So what if it's sleeping through 4 days or napping every day.  My body is being hurt and I need to let it heal.  It is temporary.  My body is not your body.  My body has a great capacity to heal and I am grateful.  I say a lot of prayers.  One day at a time.  Accepting some of those things I mentioned has helped me release some of that fear.  When I can recognize my thoughts or behaviors are fear-based I can with-hold the power I give to fear and re-direct that power to somewhere else positive.  I actually find myself laughing a lot and smiling a lot.  The time I spend crying or reacting fearfully gets shorter, I think (I hope!).  

I haven't bought a clipper because my sister cuts her little boys hair with a clipper.  She has a Flo-bee, too!   

Hey Suzanne, getting my port tomorrow...more & more nervous... I'm getting the neulast shot the day after also (I start on 6/22)  Are you getting emend? they are giving me something else ,but when I asked about emend (which everyone raves about) she said if I had a problem I can switch to that...I feel the same way as you, lets get this started so we can finish!!!  Well hoping we are all SE free!!!

I was just going through the mound of paperwork & realized I'm also going to be getting Gemzar.   I haven't had time to study up on it but I missed it somehow.  Hang in there.  Gemzar is an additional chemo drug.  The antiemetic I'm using is Zofran, looks like I'll take it just before startnig the chemo & then every 8hrs as needed plus she gave me a scrip for Compazine which is an old drug but has been pretty effective.  Sorry for the confusion.

I will be leaving for my first treatment in about 30 minutes.  I'm bringing my laptop and will chronicle the events so you will all know what to expect.  I'm scared silly, but I find that blogging helps me cope. 

ThingsChange - I heard about claritin, too.  And I plan to take one this evening, and the next two nights.  I asked my doctor and chemo nurse about it and they said it won't hurt anything.

FGCUfan - I think everyone on the DD plan gets Neulasta.  There's not enough time for a natural recovery before the next treatment.  I got my hair cut on Sunday - it's less than an inch long.  If you want to see pictures to get an idea, you can check out my blog at

www.mch-breastcancer.blogspot.com

I'm hoping it's short enough that I can use a lint roller to clean up the fallout mess.

Dsnydawn - I went to a salon with my two daughters and my best friend for my cut.  My daughter also had hers cut for Locks of Love. She's been growing it for a year, so she had more than 10" of ponytail.  We had wine, cheese and crackers and strawberries.  The stylist is a friend of my kids and she was wonderful.  It was nice to have the place to ourselves, and I handled things fairly well.  I keep telling myself it's just hair, and it will grow back. 

Cider8 - you're right about giving in to the need for rest. I am not a napper -  I've been fighting breast cancer for a year and I've probably taken two naps since starting this journey. It's about to change, though. And I bought a new sectional sofa with a chaise so I can do it comfortably.

I'd better go pack up my supplies. I hope everyone has a good day.

Hugs,

Michelle

Marial, thank you so much for posting that.  I am starting on Friday and am terrified of the side effects....it is so encouraging to hear your experience.   My dr prescribed Emend along with two other meds...I'm hoping that keeps the nausea in check, that is one of my biggest concerns.  Thanks again and congratulations to you, enjoy yourself now, you deserve it!!

It's been one week since my first infusion.  I feel much better today than I have in the past week.  No nap!  I think my main side effect has been the fatigue.  I'm grateful for others chiming in about their experience.  I think it helps me to realize that there are various degrees of side effects.  

I did get a lot of soft tissue work done at my first PT session today.  I still have pain from my mastectomy.  Hopefully working on that will only help with my chemo side effects.  Just one session has been amazing.  

I have no idea how to differentiate between Neulesta SE and chemo SE.  I think I'll be eager to see what my blood counts are next week.  

Dawn, let us know how getting the port goes.  I get mine Monday.  I'm just wondering what kind of nuisance it will be for the two days it's left 'open' for my Wed infusion.  

Still doing ok after dinner.  Hubby made boneless pork chops, salad and cole slaw.  Thirty years of marriage and now I find out he can put a meal together     For those of you who have not yet been in the chemo chair, here is a link to my blog which outlines how my day went.  I am guessing yours will be similar.

www.mch-breastcancer.blogspot.com

 Wishing everyone a good day!

Michelle

Michele, I read your blog. I am so happy you had a good first day.  I hope your night went just as well.  I start tomorrow...ugh, so much anxiety. Keep up the good work and keep blogging, It helps so much.  Wishing you a wonderful day, it's beautiful here in Connecticut.  Cheryl

Thanks,Cheryl.  I did well overnight, except I woke up extremely thirsty around 3:30.  I knew that would happen because I'm wearing th Scopolamine patch, so I had the water bottle right there.  I took an Ativan last night as a precaution.  I usually take Restoril, but the Ativan has the added "anti-nausea" effect. 

It's a beautiful day here at the lake.  But we need to return the uHaul truck and take a couple of things to my mom's, so I won't be able to sit outside until this afternoon, after I get the Neulasta shot.  I'll need to use a strong sun-blocker as apparently the chemo makes you sun-sensitive. 

Staying positive, but recognizing that things could change any minute.

Hugs to all,

Michelle