Angry and depressed!!!

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I am a stay at home mom with 3 year old twins.....my surgery is May 12th...and Im loosing my mind....I am so angry, that Drs. are just pissing my off, Im tired of them calling me..I so just want to be left alone...I want this Bilateral Mast. with recon...over and done with...It is killing me, that this is all Im thinking about and alls Im doing is crying or  yelling...and its not fair to my kids......I have low esteem to being with, this is just the icing on the cake.....I just want to be able to hold my kids when I want, Now I have to try and explain to them, why mommy cant hold you, bath you, change you or pick you up if you fall....oh and mommy wont be home to put you to bed or she wont be there when you wake up in the am...(never been away from my kids) I just quit smoking to!!!!! I just cant take it anymore......sorry for venting!!!!

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  • 1Lbick
    1Lbick Member Posts: 11
    edited May 2011

    Birchbeer6,

    HAng in there girl, it does get better.  I had the same feelings of frustration before my surgery and reconstruction.  It is not fair at all that anyone, let alone a mother should have to go through this.  But trust me, the surgery is for the best.  We need all the insurance we can get to make sure we are around to see our kids reach their milestonesSmile 

  • starbeauty
    starbeauty Member Posts: 327
    edited May 2011

    ((((((((Birch beer)))))))) so sorry you are in our little club...please know we care. Please try really hard to focus just on what you need to do each day... And don't go there in your mind about all the potential suffering you and your family may endure...that is pain on another day... And you are in today still. I totally relate to all the MD visits... I hated going to the MD before... And now there is so much more of it... But I don't have a visit today...so not dealing with it in my mind. Find some things that give you joy and do them... Get your focus on those things. You know this... You are not your breasts... You are a beautiful woman because of who you are... Not because of your surface. I bet your babies think you are the most beautiful mommy in the whole world.... See yourself through those precious innocent eyes... That is what is real. Lean into your blessings... And lean away from letting fear anxiety and panic take over. Many hugs to you.

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