Chemo June 2010

Julia - Congrats! Hope you can celebrate this weekend.

Julia that is fantastic news about your B9 results.

We were able to dodge the weather bullet again and did not have much damage from the fierce storm that ravaged other southern states.   I weep as I watch the devastation and death toll rise and wish I could do something more than pray and send money.  I'm afraid I would not be much help but I would try if i could.  

Work has been very busy and I have to work in appt's for LE therapy and then the sleeve measurment appt.  I have my second onc f/u apt since treatment ended on May 20 and I don't think he will do much except check my Vit D level and a few other blood tests.  He also does not think much of extra scans or tests at this point.   He does not do tumor markers or MRI's unless I am having symptoms.   I suppose they are right about it not making much difference when you find mets except I think with bone it can make a difference in controlling and shrinking it.  That is my info as I know it.

Jackie,  I hope you are doing well and recuperating from your surgery in good health.

Joan,  yes my brother and family are doing well but still mourning and in shock from all of the horrible damage and lives lost.

Everyone have a good weekend and hugs to all!!!!    Ginny

CHEY...OMG, you are facing a slew of dramatically life changing events, all at one time. My sincere condolences for the loss of your friend's young husband and I will pray for her and her son to find peace with that and hold their memories dear.And as for the child's leukemia, well, we can all pray that a bone marrow donor is found and that he gets the tx he needs to be well for may years to come. I am sure that this impacts your son and that you have many long conversations with him about the mysteries of life. Your boy has had a lot to deal with between your cancer, his best friend's cancer, his best friend's Dad dying and now your impending divorce. And you...WOW, a divorce on top of everything else? I'm so sorry. It won't be easy but if you have come to this decision, it may be for the best. I am encouraged to hear your general tone of optimism throughout all of these ordeals. I'll pray for your continued strength, good health and happiness! 

On a lighter note, I love your hair extensions. It looks great and I bet it feels great to be looking more like your old self again.  You'll be a glamour girl with new locks and soon, new foobs.

Your post reminded me of a quote from Winston Churchill that I read this week: "If you are going through hell, keep going."  So, Chey...Onward and upward. Keep looking forward, never back.  Prayers and positive thoughts headed to Northern California and earmarked for you, your family and friends. Please let us know how your doctor's visits go on the 10th and 11th.  Big hugs!  Bon 

chey-  Oh my sweet girl!  Your challenges just keep on coming!  Bon said it so well, don't look back, just keep looking forward!  You have grown so much during this year, and I know you have become stronger.  I will keep you and your friends in my prayers.  Love your new photo.  You look beautiful (and about 16 YO)!

You girls are so good to me and are the reason i have become so strong! hehe, when i look back and remember that scared shaking kitten who felt like she was on a freeway, wow!... I remember sometime during chemo, i was at the ONC remember Dr Doom?.. the nurse said im going to get you a blanket and i asked why? she said "cause your cold,your shaking", i said "im not cold,im scared" kinda brings a tear to my eye just now thinking about it, but yes i do believe ive come a long way!!! and i know it would not have happened without all of my big sisters here, and my lil sis at home. heheh.

things will be good, it is a shame my husband could not see that, my biggest highs and my lowest lows, he was not there. i was in a chemo chair on my birthday, he never, got me a card, never took my lil one out to get mommy a gift or a card.he never really has ever done that, but i thought, now should be the time, ya know? lol not even a pat on the back when i finished. i know he cares in his own way, he will go out at 3 in the morning and warm up my car for me,or put gas in it, when it foggy and im in the driveway, he will go out and turn it around so i dont have to back out,these are the ways he shows his love i think, but the compassion is not there for me.you ladies woulda all came here and slapped a knot on his head (as my grandmother used to say lol) had you heard some of the things he would say, lol hahaha, i could just see all you girls lined up at my front door, saying " what the heck do you mean everyone can work while taking Taxol"  each one of you one by one slapping a knot on his head.hahahaha my grandmother would be up there laughing...too funny, but yes, he has no clue what i went through, i didnt have the flu, and it was not just antibiotics i was on!! im really understanding how far i have come..hehe he is a wonderful dad and the best provider any woman could have. all my friends tell me you need to think about it be cause he is a good man! lol he really is, its just the one thing he cant give,is the one thing i cant live without. He will take care of me till the day i die, because i am the mother of his children,and he has respect for that.as me for him.. we both know it a privilege to have kids and a privilege to have family members and friends love our children, we both understand that things dont work out and It's ok, it's ok to move on.. my friends say,that will change, lol i say nope!!! i know my husband and i know me, we will always be a family, not just till the kids turn 18 but for life, we are tied!! you are who you are, my motto has always been,"people are different,that's what makes the world go round" he told me yesterday, i do love you, i said i know, but we dont work, he said i know... so not to worry! im always giggling the kids are great. oh he came to me this morning and said, we cant get a divorce, i said why, he said you need my medical Ins..ahahahahaha how true is that, lol so i guess it will be a legal separation, lol anyway,  Not to worry, im doing good,

love my big sisters

chey

Oh my darling Chey !    You are a strong woman who has faced so, so much in such a short period of time.  Take good care of yourself and remember how much we love you !

Dearest Ginny, my sincerest of congratulatons for enduring the trials of this past year and emerging victorious! cancer did not defeat you and you are moving forward to a bright, happy, energetic and healthy future! BRAVO!!!! (Please note that I still will not give cancer a capital c, even if it is at the beginning of a sentence. I hate it enough to refuse it any importance, including capitalization!)

I am thrilled for those of you who have gone through this ordeal with thouroughly supportive spouses by your side. And for those who have struggled with less than in-tune mates or no one at all... We've all come through to the other side and won't forget who did and did not make our burden a bit lighter. I serendipidously ender a iong term, long distance relationship just a few weeks before the fateful dx, and can honestly say that it has been better to do this journey by myself, than having to worry about his feelings and emotions during my treatments. There are worse things than being alone...and the biggest one I can think of is being tied to someone who just doesn't 'get it'.

Congratulations to Ginny and Latte !  I am so glad you have both made it another year to ahsre yourselves with the world. 

Bon- as usual your words are perfect. 

My husbands Aunt was buried today.  She was 86 and at least 8 years our from breast cancer,  The cancer did not come back.  She died from heart trouble.  Her two children and one grandson spoke at the service. One of the strongest feelings I had after hearing those homilies is that your loved ones want you to be happy.  All three spoke in detail about the simple pleasures this Aunt enjoyed and what made her happy.  Her children seem to be taking great comfort in her happiness.  So,  the lesson I learned today is,   do what you need to do to be happy. The ones who care about you the most will appreciate it.

Chey - my heart just aches for you and all you've been through recently and this past year.  I must say, your post did have an upbeat tone to it, so I'm hoping you are able to stay positive.

Dmom - during my entire battle with BC I was referred to many times as a Dragon Slayer by friends and family because of how hard they felt I battled.  I eventually assumed the name.  On my final TX day a friend sent me the statue you see - she is a Dragon Slayer!  Very appropriate I'd say. 

Kittycat, any results of your bone scan and CT?  Do you have surgery dates yet?

Latte, I did have tumor markers done but I don't think they are reliable.  Like you, no scans at all.  I feel the same way as you, sometimes I am ok with that and other times I'm not.

Ginny, are you done with the intensive part of LE therapy?  I am still struggling to get the sleve/glove combo that works for me.  Very expensive with custom made garments.  I think your patients are blessed to have you as a rad tech.  You truly understand what they are experiencing.

Lizzyanne, my hair is so o o slow growing.  I am still quite bald on the very top. I am now using Rogain to make it grow.  It seems to be helping but I don't know if I will ever get rid of wearing wigs.

Jackie, I want to hear all about the wedding!

Dmom, yes the snow melted, then last weekend we had a late season blizzard for two days. The storm knocked out internet to the western part of the province and the main cable that broke was underwater in our massive flood so it took 4 days to restore. I was supposed to go to my daughters for a visit but all the highways were closed.  I am so ready for summer

My doctor gave me the antidepressant Citalopram 2 months ago.  I cannot believe the difference it has made for me.  I feel great most of the time.  I don't think I recognized how low my mood was.  I am glad she kept gently nudging me to try it. Now if it would just make my hair grow...

Love and Hugs to All, Mimi

Ginny- love your stories and your proactive attitude about everything !

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY !  Went out with husband, kids, both sets of parents and a sister yesterday to avoid crowds.  I got cards and little gifts this morning along with a home cooked breakfast.  Will spend some time in the garden today.

Re lymphedema I was told by my surgeon to wear a sleeve and gauntlet every day for six months post surgery to avoid lymphedema and squeeze a soft ball 400 times a day.  I would like to say I followed those rules, but I can't.  I wore the sleeve for about 5 months and never wore the gauntlet as it cut off circulation to my thumb.  I do try to wear the sleeve when I exercise or do yard work.  I have no idea if it will keep lymphedema away.  Just thought I would share what I have been told. 

Re hair.  I got it colored about three weeks ago and am pleased to see a quater inch of roots.  It is taking a long time to grow in.  Now at least I can see some progress.

Enjoy your day !

Ditto...what Jackie said.

Hugs all around!

Hi to my favorite ladies!  Hope all the moms had a wonderful day yesterday (sounds like you did JFV!)  I like what Designermom said about us "mothering" her--I feel the same way!  You all were there for me when I needed it--Thank you!!

Spring has finally arrived here in MN!  I have been outside doing a little gardening.  I don't enjoy gardening too much, but it sure feels good to be able to do it after 2 years of chemo and rads!  My gardens have been sorely neglected!  Hope everyone else is having some nice, warm, calm weather too