Nervous Wreck STILL

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peverson
peverson Member Posts: 55
edited June 2014 in Stage III Breast Cancer

It's been just over a year since my diagnosis and first mastectomy, 8 months since the end of chemo, 6 since the end of rads, and 4 since my last prophylactic surgeries. I'm still a nervous wreck. How does one "move on"? I'm still fatigued waaay more than I expected. Got some post-surgical pain from December 2010. I've seen counselors, but they have been of limited help. I can't take antidepressants. I don't know what else to do. Help.

Prior to diagnosis, had unrelated illnesses that affected mouth and stomach (since cleared up). Lost 25 pounds. Prior to that, nursed 25yo son through treatment for testicular cancer.

Patsy

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  • voraciousreader
    voraciousreader Member Posts: 7,496
    edited April 2011

    Have you tried cognitive therapy?

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  • voraciousreader
    voraciousreader Member Posts: 7,496
    edited April 2011

    There's also hypnosis.

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  • peverson
    peverson Member Posts: 55
    edited April 2011

    Voracious, do you mean tracking thoughts and reframing them? I am trying, just starting. The problem is that I can't seem to find a counselor who has worked with cancer patients. And I think that would help.

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  • voraciousreader
    voraciousreader Member Posts: 7,496
    edited April 2011

    Call your local cancer society and ask. Both therapies are helpful with anxiety.

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  • AmyIsStrong
    AmyIsStrong Member Posts: 1,755
    edited April 2011

    Peverson - I feel for you. That is A LOT to go through. I agree, a counselor specializing in cancer patients is INVALUABLE. My cancer center had 2 on staff - I saw one throughout chemo and can still go back if need be. It is very reassuring to know that she is there and that she GETS IT.  I encourage you to contact your local or regional breast cancer or Wellness Community or the social worker at your treatment center to get a referral.

    Would some exercise help? I work out (hard) daily - I have found it critical  - raising endorphins and burning off stress.

    Keep pushing forward. Don't give up and settle for not feeling good. After the things you've experienced, you DESERVE to have a wonderful quality of life.

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  • NancyD
    NancyD Member Posts: 3,562
    edited April 2011

    p - I don't have any advice, just support and hope that you find a treament provider that helps. You've been through a lot of major stressors. We understand, even if we haven't experienced the problem ourselves, how these things take their toll. {{{HUGS}}}.

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  • Gitane
    Gitane Member Posts: 1,885
    edited April 2011

    Hi Patsy,  I just wanted to share with you that my all time low came a full year after I finished treatment and surgery.  It takes a long time for our bodies to come back, and even longer for us to heal and cope emotionally.  I have been working at being more mindful after learning how it helps with depressed feelings.  The books Full Catastrophe Living, and The Mindful Way Through Depression have helped me to change how I live my life, for the better.  I hope you can find what you need to help make things better for yourself.  Hugs, G.

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  • sugarplum
    sugarplum Member Posts: 318
    edited April 2011

    Boy, did your post strike a chord with me - I'm 5 years past diagnosis and still worry EVERY DAY. I, too, can't take antidepressants (tried 4 different ones & they all made me sicker than chemo ever did) and the counselors I tried also didn't "get it" - the one time I saw a cancer counselor she was talking about "reframing" and I just ended up tuning her out (maybe the timing wasn't right). I've succeeded in ruining the quality of life for both myself and my husband, who is sick & tired of comments like "if I live that long", etc. I am an avid exerciser but that doesn't seem to help my mental state - I have a long history of phobias combined with IBS (which in 2000 also caused me to lose a lot of weight).

     Just wanted you to know that I'm out here with you - and yes, still kicking after all these years!

    Julie       

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  • peverson
    peverson Member Posts: 55
    edited April 2011

    Your comments are so helpful. Really. It's nice to know that I'm not alone, that others do struggle, too. Seems like everybody else I know who's had a cancer diagnosis just sails. Got the "reframing" lecture from one of them--she's got a slow-growing lymphoma. Another wore her freaking chemo pump to work. Another "only" needed a lumpectomy and one (not two types of) chemo. A sister-in-law didn't need anything other than surgery and rads. Here I am, terrified to go back to work next week, over a year out, still a bit in shock by the diagnosis. I KNOW that I have to figure out how I want to live the rest of my life. I KNOW that I need to adjust my thinking patterns. HOW is the big question for me. We don't have a cancer society here, nor an oncology social worker here, nor a counselor who specializes in oncology patients. It's all hit or miss. You all are my peer counselors. Seeing that not everybody sails is strangely reassuring.

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  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited April 2011

    I lurked onthese boards for a long time before I posted. I read topics that helped me through. Just realizing that others felt the same way as me was theraptic. I am going to a counselor and she has me working on my self esteem. Last time I came out and told her that I needed answers to my cancer questions not self esteem issues ( I never had any self esteem and probably never will). Most of my issues that I had were honestly helped right here with these ladies. I also go to two different support groups. I've found out that if I keep busy with other things, I don't focus as much on the cancer. 

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