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  • Treso
    Treso Member Posts: 149
    edited April 2011

    GirlFriday:  You sound like such  wonderful friend, you'll know when to  step up and when to back off.  I wish your friend and you all the best.  No matter what happens, there is love and support and, that's a wonderful thing to hold onto.

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  • Treso
    Treso Member Posts: 149
    edited April 2011

    AmyIsStrong:  So cliche but there are so many silver linings out there.  I know sometimes we REALLY have to search but, it's always worth the effort.  Thanks for your reply.

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  • barbe1958
    barbe1958 Member Posts: 19,757
    edited April 2011

    Remember, it's the LITTLE things she'll remember the most.....a bear, chocolate, flowers for Spring planted in her garden for her.

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  • GirlFriday4
    GirlFriday4 Member Posts: 14
    edited May 2011

    Thanks again to all of you. My friend has done awesomely... still teaching full time, mother of a small child, and more. She has excelled at her job, and mothering, and being spectacular in general.

    She has recently become sick. I had been bringing food but she can no longer eat. What can i do now that she is so sick? What did you love the most that someone did for you?

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  • Treso
    Treso Member Posts: 149
    edited May 2011

    Made me laugh...

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  • GirlFriday4
    GirlFriday4 Member Posts: 14
    edited May 2011

    I think she's too sick to laugh. Sleeping when she's not throwing up. I guess the zofran isn't working so well for her.

    I know it's not about me, but I'm so pissed off and I know it's unproductive to be angry at the unfairness of this, but I can't help it, I really just am. Such a stupid corny question, "Why do bad things happen to good people?" but I am really angry about that very thing. I could not hate cancer any more than I do. 

    I'm trying to stay focused on the fact that the tumor is shrinking, but I just hate feeling so helpless, and I hate seeing people I love hurt so much.  

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  • starbeauty
    starbeauty Member Posts: 327
    edited May 2011

    Girlfriday...look into the drug Emend for your friend... See if her insurance will cover it... It is wicked expensive, but totally stops the nausea and vomiting... About 450 per treatment.

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  • barbe1958
    barbe1958 Member Posts: 19,757
    edited May 2011

    Her onc has to know that she is sick. There are many drugs that can help her!

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  • GirlFriday4
    GirlFriday4 Member Posts: 14
    edited June 2011

    It turns out she had a bug, thank God. I know those are dangerous too but I was so upset to think she would just feel this way for the next several months. Her doctors kept saying, "You shouldn't feel this sick." which must have been frustrating when she felt so sick! She's over it now. She was just miserable for a couple weeks, I guess little bugs affect her more now while she's getting chemo. Now mostly she is just exhausted, and still having to work a full time job and raise a child.

    I will tell her about Emend if she doesn't already know about it, we're just hopeful that will never happen again! I got to pamper her last weekend and her family and I LOVE that.  Also Treso, I made her laugh a couple times. And let her rest. Finally.

     I know I always say thanks, but thank you women so much.  

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  • D4Hope
    D4Hope Member Posts: 352
    edited June 2011

    I guess it's the Cancer can never be cured that gets me. My husbands Aunt is a 40 year survivor.

    I have to tell you I am not happy about the prospects of looking over my shoulder forever.

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  • barbe1958
    barbe1958 Member Posts: 19,757
    edited June 2011
    I'd rather have a shoulder to look over....Wink
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  • KTJ21
    KTJ21 Member Posts: 20
    edited June 2011

         Hello all.  I'm new to the boards, but I read this post and was so happy to have found it.  I'm in a similar situation as GirlFriday4.  A good friend and mentor was diagnosed with breast cancer in late April of this year, and I've been having problems knowing how to deal with it.  It has helped tremendously that she's been so open about her diagnosis (Stage IIIc, grade 2, triple negative) and her treatment (She sends e-mail updates every time she goes to the doctor).  But I'm still so afraid I'm going to say something wrong or do something inappropriate. 

          She's handling everything so well, which makes me wonder why I'm having such a problem with it.  She started chemo last week, and I was so freaked out about it.  I think a huge part of it is that she's 43 and I'm 21.  I feel very young and inexperienced.  She was my professor and mentor through college, but we became pretty close friends since we went to the same church and saw each other quite a bit outside of the classroom.  So obviously, I want to be there for her, but it's difficult to know how to do that. 

           Anyway, I'm rambling...  I mainly just wanted to say thank you to all of the wonderful women on here who offer help, support, and guidance.  You are all fantastic!  No one close to me has ever had to face cancer before, and reading your comments has made me feel much more comfortable and less alone.  Your advice on this thread in particular has been super helpful.  Thank you, thank you, thank you.

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