Starting Chemo April 2009

Hey all...still here. Titan...no tsunami troubles in PDX. It was southern Oregon coast and northern CA. coast that was hit. Actually, it was were we vacationed last fall. Although, I might be more radioactive than I was before. Saw my radiology oncologist on the news last night...telling people not to panic. The radiation exposure should be small. Still it's a little scary.  

On a more positive front, my arm and hand are really improving. I have finally after 2.5 months I have moved from wearing my sleeve & gauntlet daily to just wearing an arm brace. The brace seems to be helping. I've even moved from wearing the compression bra to a normal one. Talk about relief!!!!!! Whew...I certainly hope this continues. At least, I'm FINALLY moving the right direction.

Lena...sorry to hear you are having to deal with more crap. I know you won't freak out...but still...it sucks.

Well tomorrow I'm going to Plant Nerd night...my favorite annual event here in Portland. The Goddess of Flora are the featured singing group.

Hope ya all have a great weekend.

Betsy

Wow, as of a couple of days ago, I think spring actually MIGHT be starting to peek at New Hampshire a little bit. I can see a little bit of ground, a good deal of mud, and the rest of the still considerable ground snow cover is down to maybe "only" a foot or so!

About the "New Crap" -- thanks so much for your well-wishes, and sure, I'll let you know what it is once I find out, but I have the same feeling about this one that I did for my original tumor, which I turned out to be even more right about THAT one than I expected! So, I don't mind the waiting to be scanned and then to see the doctor and get the results, because as long as I DON'T know, I don't have to face any more decisions between evils. I find it comforting to know there's nothing I can do about things I don't know about, so why worry? LOL

Chelev, I made the mistake of starting to go topless last April -- way too soon but we had an early spring 80-degrees heat wave, and I was depressed about the excess 30 pounds on me and felt hideously ugly ANYWAY, so I stopped wearing my wig. I figured if I wasn't going to look nice with it on, I may as well be physically comfortable.  As it happened, after I had lost 25 of the 30 pounds I tried on the wig and I looked 'gorgeous' again -- which is why I'm sorry I took it off so soon!  And you're right, my hair is NOT growing fast enough for me!  It never did, though.  It had taken me ten years to go from bottom of my shoulders to the "almost to the waist" length I had before I started chemo.

:::::sigh:::::

Betsy, I was looking around for other info on the forum but saw some tangential (for me) stuff that made me think of you (and Judy too somehow)...

http://community.breastcancer.org/forum/91/topic/747016?page=1#idx_30

and an excerpt from the "relevant" post that caught my eye:

#1. I wear the Bellise compression bra, which is designed to treat women with truncal lymphedema following mastectomy. I do not have any visible swelling or other signs of lymphedema, but the Belisse bra has changed my life! I think the doc at MD Anderson is right on -- he suspects that there is some amount of lymphedema involved with PMPS. You can go to belisse.com to learn about the bra. It needs to be prescribed by a doc. 

http://www.bellisse.com/resources/articles/ques_corner.shtml 

OK all, hope you're feeling well. :-) 

Glad you enjoyed your trip, Geri, and I hope you get over your cold soon.

I don't know what the hell is wrong with me. I'm taking my antidepressant (and my Ritalin) regularly -- I haven't missed a single dose -- but I feel like emotional shit anyway. Today is the third consecutive day I feel like this. I mean back to the crying jags several times per day bad. I know I'm on the maximum dose of the Wellbutrin, and even very small doses of SSRIs screw me up sexually, which is just as depressing as the depression itself.

I keep trying to tell myself how much worse off I could be and that I'm just a spoiled brat who doesn't know how good she has it. As in, how about Japan? Or worse, Elizabeth, NJ?  But it's not really working. Watching movies as "escape" -- tried it yesterday for the first time in about a month or so isn't working because, well, for the last few months actually,  I just f***ing can't even stand the sight of attractive young people anymore (I've been mostly avoiding the "new" neighbors who moved in, in January, for the same reason; all three of them are 20-somethings and one of them looks a LOT like I did when I was that age). The things that normally interest me and keep my mind occupied -- I have plenty "fun" things to do but I'm just not interested in doing any of it. It wouldn't hurt if I cleaned the house (before it has a chance to get dirty) but I'm just not in the mood to do that either (I haven't played my sims in two weeks, and emails from Woobsha (my hacking workshop) are piling up unanswered), and, it's too cold to go outside for a walk. I guess THAT'S just as well, though -- it would be bad if I went out and burst into tears in public anyway.

OK, Pack Rat to the rescue. He called me shortly after my last post and suggested we go out to dinner. While waiting for him to get here I had time to wash the three-day accumulation of dishes in the sink, take a shower and actually fired up my Sims for a bit. Then he got here, we went out to the Salt Hill Pub. Yummm, even though I blew my diet out the window. I had an apricot sour (my favorite mixed drink), then ate cheesesteak with fried peppers, mushrooms and onions, french fries and onion rings we split and then pumpkin cake with coffee for dessert!  Naturally we had to do a lot of "exercise" ;-) to work all that off...he had some kind of spicy ham dish and I forgot what else was in it but like my selection, his was also one of those yummy things you eat when you're NOT on a diet or have only once in awhile as a treat if you're happy with your weight and want to keep it where it is.

Yesterday morning sucked though -- I had to be at Dartmouth at *7:30 AM* for the CT/PET scan (they do both together here, not separately like at my last treatment center), which meant we had to get up at 6 AM, get dressed and get out since not only was the appointment early (I won't be doing THAT again; 9 AM at the absolute earliest from now on) but I couldn't have my morning coffee either (no eating or drinking after midnight the night before a PET scan). So we got out at 6:15 AM (too dark, almost at my "too dangerous" threshold--first time I drove in that much dark in years)! Another reason why I won't agree to a 7:30 appointment again unless someone ELSE is driving! Yeah right. Anyway, after scan I was scheduled for a blood test my oncologist wanted me to have, and then an appointment with my PCP. So I mentioned to my Pack Rat just before we went our ways, if the doctor appointment means I need to get more medication, well the Rite Aid is on the way to where he lives, and he says, "Yeah, that'll be around lunch time. We can have lunch at the General Store." So OK, we go.

Got to Dartmouth on time though, but I knew it really wasn't going to be a good day, planned lunch with my Pack Rat notwithstanding. A "good day" IMO does NOT begin with a 30-45 minute drive, early in the morning, without coffee -- and shortly after arrival, be stuck with needles and injected with something radioactive.   :-P

OK. Scan goes smoothly, as soon as I'm out of there I get my butt to the cafe because I NEED COFFEE!!! (Dartmouth-Hitchcock Medical Center is a ginormous complex which is more than "just" a teaching hospital and cancer treatment center). After coffee I go to the oncology area to get my blood taken, and then onto the "general medicine" area to see my PCP. I was way early for HER, but I had my iBook and Sims. Finally got back interested in playing them again. A couple of simdays go by, then I see the doctor.

Told her that the icing and heating my shoulder had helped, but not entirely (it doesn't hurt constantly anymore, but range of motion, certain movements are still very painful), and that the Tramadol wasn't as good a painkiller as the Darvocet had been. Also we talked about the Ritalin and recent moodiness even though I think the Ritalin actually IS helping me focus a LITTLE bit better. And........I told her about "It" -- the new lump -- even though I had the scan and am seeing the oncologist next week. She examined me and measured It. It's 2.5" x 2" and she says MAYBE it could be a cyst, and like I mentioned, see if it lights up on the scan, and maybe it won't. But if it does, well my timing was certainly good to find out, what with the scans and appointments with both my doctors coming up.  But then she said she was going to tell my oncologist about it as a "heads up" regarding the upcoming scan results. I couldn't help but be amazed; in addition to doctor-who-actually-listens, there's "inter-doctor communications" here. Like the psychiatrist had reminded my PCP to follow up with me about the Ritalin. When I mentioned how different this was from just about all the medical care I'd ever had (especially at my last treatment center) she said NOBODY should be treated like I'd been.

So end result of PCP appointment; both my Tramadol and Ritalin dosage are slightly increased, and in addition to sending the heads up to my oncologist about checking the scan about that lump, she also says she's going to look at the scans too with regards to the shoulder, and depending on what she sees/my pain situation, she might send me to an orthopedist. And we also agreed it was a good thing my "other" shrink stuff is coming up (turns out the psychiatrist I recently saw was really just screening/intake and then refers you to the psychiatrist you're going to deal with regularly concerning meds and/or any possible psychotherapy). So I have appointments in April for a "regular" psychiatrist who will take over for medications and a therapist for cognitive behavioral therapy. (I think the therapist is actually first though, but it's on my calendar.)

OK, now I can go home, and as soon as I pull out of the parking garage -- it's straight into a freakin' BLIZZARD!!! :-O First day of spring, my ASS! I had a white-knuckled bug-eyed drive back (I HATE when I can't see the lines on the road, scares the crap out of me!), and was debating if I really wanted to do another 40 mins of that for a round trip for lunch at the Lempster general store. When I got to Rite Aid, I called my Pack Rat and he laughed and said, "I knew you were going to call, I was wondering if you were still going to want to come out here" and I told him how the drive back from Dartmouth had been and asked if it was any better in Lempster, and he said no, it's the same, so "Get your medicine, buy some milk, go home and be safe -- we'll reschedule lunch for when it's NOT snowing." LOL

Anyway, the "biochemical firestorm" is over for now. I think Sunday night with my Pack Rat helped as much or more than the doctor visit, though. 

When I told him what the PCP said about the lump, he was actually optimistic thinking maybe it's just a cyst. We'll see though. 

Errr. OK. Guess I'll eat breakfast and go get the snow off the car and deck........ 

Lena - You could be a comedian, I swear. The thought of you coming out of that garage into the snow - I know it's not funny, but the way you write always makes me laugh (especially now that it's all over and you are home safe).  It makes my heart so happy to read of the continuity of care you are receiving. You completely deserve it and I am so glad it has become your new reality.  One more reason that this move (no matter how challenging it was) was DEFINITELY the right thing to do.

Judi - YES the therapy sessions that are effective are the most draining.  I remember the one that was most impactful for me left me completely drained emotionally. But the results have lasted through today! Sort of like my personal trainer always says "You aren't paying me to make it easy."  Same with therapy. If it's just a nice talk, I'd rather have that with a friend, for free! So good for you for pushing onwards.  I hope the results are good for you.

Speaking of my trainer - I revamped my entire workout. I do 4 days of weightlifting and 2 days of cardio a week now.  I even eat protein powder (whey, not soy) after my weight workouts to build muscle. I have weight lifting gloves and everything.  I have to admit I feel a little macho, lol. I decided to give it a quarter (3 mo) and then will reevaluate.  But so far so good. It is HARD but in a different way than all that cardio. You do the reps,then rest a minute and a half, then do the next set. so it's not like being all out of breath, sweaty and panting. It's different, and in kind of a good way. Stay tuned - we'll see how my results look in June.

Spring seems to be finally here - well, everywhere but at Lena's house!  I am very relieved. This winter was rough. SO GLAD it is over. I see a few crocus, beginnings of some daffodils, and a few hyacinths starting to pop up. It brings me pure joy! Lena - i do hope that was the LAST snow of the year up there.

Amy

Amy - your workouts sound awesome! You have incredible self discipline and I am sure you will get the results you want. Maybe we can see a photo in June? Thank you again for all your support with my therapy, it made a big difference to me.

Lena - thanks again for coming by, you always make me smile . Hope the Spring comes soon for you, although here today it is grey and wet and not very warm.

Have a good day all, hugs, Judy x

Hi all,

Lena...I currently wear a compression bra, it's made from special material that some how massages your tissue if you move. The only thing I hate is that it's really old lady looking. I swear it goes down to my navel, but they do work. My chest is so much better. I wear a special swell pack when things flare up. Some days, I  so long to go braless. But GRRRRR not going to happen.  I hate changing into my workout clothes at the gym or pool since anyone changing their clothes sees my bra and sleeve. It makes me feel old. At least my hair no longer looks like a bad old lady hairdo.So I'm moving forward on at least one front. 

Spring has arrived in Portland...rain..rain...rain. No snow just tons of rain. All the plants and yards look very lush right now. Cherry trees are in bloom, hellebores are magnificent this year.

Glad to hear everyone is doing ok. Geri I hope your cold is better. Lena...did you get your CT results yet?  Titan I can totally relate to your lack of mult-task abilities...it is very frustrating. Amy...wow your workout routine sounds gruelling. I'm back to square one in my workout routine. My arm flare up really set me back. Judy...glad to hear you are making progress with your counselor. Helen...how are you?

Well, Titan (good to see you BTW) -- I'll find out about the lump next Wednesday (3/30/10) so nothing to report at present. And yes it makes TOTAL sense to get frustrated by the effects of continuing chemo brain -- I do too, but I think the Ritalin is starting to help some more. I was NEVER very good at multitasking, so "inability to multitask" isn't my problem although it does happen to be true that what minimal ability I had for multitasking before chemo is all gone now. My cognitive issues are losses of focus, ability to concentrate, and short term memory, all of which I had in great abundance prior to chemo. The Ritalin is helping the focus/concentration issues at least, but maybe it's a mixed blessing. That is, instead of flitting from idea to idea easily distracted unable to focus on any of them from chemo through before starting the Ritalin, now when I go on a tangent (which happens less often, thankfully) I focus on the tangent just as well as on the primary, but when I come off the tangent I then proceed to forget how I got there in the first place.

Well at least I can finally (sorta) think straight........   :::::sigh:::::

Betsy, well, I was just thinking of you when I saw that other compression bra. If the one you have is working and you're happy with it, there's no reason to change. About the changing clothes in "public" bit -- I haven't in years (I only did it while enduring forcible PE in school as a kid/teen) and won't, PERIOD.  I'm only willing to take my clothes off in PRIVATE: to shower/bathe, for sex and for a doctor. Not that I buy clothes often, but when I do --  clothing stores which do not have a dressing room with private curtained off areas to try the clothes on do not get my business -- unless they're very close to where I live and have a liberal exchange/refund policy which allows me to try stuff on at home, keep what I like and what fits me, bring back and be refunded for what didn't look good on me even if it fit, and exchange what I liked but didn't fit quite right for a bigger or smaller one.

And yes, the reason for all this modesty on my part, now that my former excuse which served me for 20-something years -- "I'm too fat!" -- is no longer applicable, is my cancer-mangled misshapen disfigured right breast. *I* don't like to see it myself, so I'm really not up to showing it off. Ohh, and you know what this made me just realize? (OMG) Even though my Pack Rat has been so accepting of all this and acting as though it doesn't matter what I look like, and, we still have plenty of wild hot rats-in-heat sex (actually more than we used to since I moved up here) -- I've been keeping the bedroom light off except for the little nightlight! Gosh, I didn't do that when I was fat, but I do for THIS! Go figure.

Nope, no spring here yet. Today's partly cloudy so no snow or ice, but it's cold (in the 30s) and windy. 

Well, enjoy your weekends everyone. 

Actually...my new radiated boob looks so much better than my natural boob. It's tight, perky and you can hardly see any scaring. The radiation burnt the scar right off my body. Only problem, it hurts with any kind of pressure. My acupuncturist thought it was fake, as it's very hard and pretty round looking. A prefect LA fake look. LOL. Damn wish the rest of my body was a tight and cute. Oh well, if it didn't hurt LH most of the time, I'd love it. My other droopy one...is sort of sad looking in comparison. Frankly, I don't care about it that much, as I know I'm one of the fortunate ones...at least I have a boob.

Hope ya all have a great week.

Betsy

Hi everyone, hope the weekend was fun for all!

Our weekend was nice. We spent Saturday with friends and yesterday we did some shopping and I took my 2 girls out for a Starbucks and some quality time. We had a good laugh together, which I realize, we don't always find the time to do. Today, I am back at work and not happy that I am still in winter clothes!

Anyhow, good to hear from you all.

Lena - good luck for the 30th. I am thinking about you and hope that it turns out be nothing. My memory seems to be getting worse, but that could be from being very overtired at the moment. I am finding it difficult to get things done and sometimes just shut down from the overload. Yesterday I found myself asking my kids the same thing over and over, to the point where they were all laughing so much, it became funny. But I think, sometimes it is ok to laugh at these things, beats crying I suppose.

Helen, I am so sorry that you are feeling so low. I too have no boobs and it can be very difficult to deal with. For the most part, I don't think about it, but when I dress, undress, shower, try to buy a bathing suit etc, it just stares me in the face and it is horrible. I am not sure that it is something that I will ever come to terms with and that together with your hair are very valid reasons for feeling depressed or low. Maybe when the Spring comes, you will feel encouraged to get out and walk and feel the need less for comfort foods? It has been very difficult for me to lose wait over the winter and it is a painfully slow process. I have lost almost 7 pounds, but it has taken almost 3 months which is a very long time. Any kind of change is scarey, but changing your path may be just what you need. It will give you time for yourself and time to think about what you would like to do next. We are always here to listen to you, so come by whenever you need to.

Amy and Betsy, good to hear from you both! Sending you ALL hugs for a good Monday, Judy x

Hahaha, what a shock, I DON'T have to wait for my appointment for news after all My oncologist just called TODAY!  Yes, I'm still going to see her tomorrow, but she called to tell me -- 

1. The PET scan showed nothing on the left breast about a cancerously active lump (the new one), but she says PET isn't the best test for that; instead I should have it mammo'ed and ultrasounded, and she says she'll set that up for me tomorrow.  ::::sigh::::: OUCH I hate mammos, but.... OK, guess I gotta have it. :-(

2. PET showed activity in my known cancerous right breast, and she's going to want to talk more in detail about what was, at our last appointment, a brief mention; saying she'd want to talk more next time depending on results of my next scan (which, now, is the one I just had: the M-word (mastectomy).

Alright, I know at LEAST two of you are totally boobless, so if any of you had a BMX with NO RECONSTRUCTION, I would greatly appreciate it if you would post your experience with the surgery, and especially, the recovery in terms of both pain and how long it took you to be able to do what you normally do in terms of light housework, grocery shopping, driving and so on (or direct me to where you might have already posted about it). I have been intermittently looking for this kind of info in the surgery areas of BCO but can only find women who had it with reconstruction, and I know that complicates things -- which is why, if I have a BMX (if the "new one" does turn out to be malignant, this is a definite possibility; and maybe even if it isn't), I will not be doing recon (dunno if I'll go flat or pad my bra when I go out, but I'm not doing any surgery that isn't medically necessary). Ehhh, hell, I'll just open a thread in that area and ask my specific question there. Sorry to bug you all.

Wow Geri, you're sure doing a lot of traveling lately! And all to warm places too...Florida? Puerto Rico?  I guess you just have to get away from our frigid Northeastern winters, huh? (I am SOOOOOOOOO ready for the spring which we're apparently NOT going to get!) .... and hey you have a boyfriend, don't you get in the mood with HIM? I mean that's mostly how I get in the mood these days, WITH my Pack Rat. Treatment killed almost all of my former spontaneous constant libido so now it's rare for me to get in the mood on frequent random occasions the way I used to; now I NEED my Pack Rat to go into heat! (I am just as sick and tired of being damaged goods/feeling like I'm 90 years old as I am of winter!)

Helen -- you've mentioned that even though you used to love your job, it became a source of stress for you since treatment (THIS time, not your first BC). If leaving it will reduce the stress, it WILL be a good thing. Too much stress makes depression even worse, and that’s all you need -- NOT --!  Heck, just the THOUGHT of a full time job (which would also probably require multitasking, at least to a point) stresses the daylights out of me. I really wish I could give you a full thick head of hair, (noncancerous) boobs, or slim you down the way you'd like.... :-(  (Hell if I could do that, I’d have MY former healthy matched set of 34Cs back and my hair almost down to my waist again too!)

Gotta go find out if my Pack Rat fixed his car yet and if not, I'll have to go get him. He said he'd come with me to the oncologist tomorrow. I told him I could use the emotional indulgence of him coming with me, and also finally he CAN -- I told you he works from home for 3 weeks, then goes to CT for a week to work in the office right? Well so far all my oncologist appointments ended up during the weeks he was in CT, until THIS one.

(See, I'm not so sure I can even be presented with or discuss any more MAJOR treatment ideas without the "immoral support"... LOL ... I feel like I'm falling apart and way past my limit when it comes to dealing with this by myself. :-( )

:::::sigh:::::

Hope you're all doing OK. I'll be back when I know more.... 

Geri - good to hear from you and glad you are feeling better now. Puerto Rico sounds wonderful and WARM. Hope you have a great time.

Lena - pleased to hear that your lump seems ok, good luck for the mamogram and ultrasound tomorrow. I think it is good that your PR is going with you and that you are not alone. I agree with Amy - enjoy the help and support.

Yes, I am unfortunately one of the women here with no boobs. I had a bilat mastectomy and was supposed to have reconstruction with expanders. However, the skin died (sorry if this is TMI) and the PS had to take out the expanders in a second surgery. There was no time for me to have a third surgery as I needed to begin chemo. So, I am still boobless today and am thinking of having the surgery when we get back to Israel.

As far as recovery is concerned. It was painful to start with. I did not react well to the very strong painkillers but did take valium which helped. The main problem was that I began chemo very soon after the second surgery so I had no real time to heal. I did have PT before chemo though and that really did help. After a while, I just did the excercises alone at home and stopped going. Now, I have full range of motion. I occasionally feel tightness across my chest. I wear prosthetics every day, and I am very aware of the fact that I have no boobs. It doesn't make me feel good about myself, but I needed to wait until I was ready to think about the surgery because I did not have a very positive experience. I hope this helps and I apologize to you all if I gave too much detail in this posting. Let me know if you want to know anything else.

Writing about my experience just now has made me realize that I am so lucky to have you all here. It was such a horrible time in my life and you have all helped me get to this point - thank you all for being here all the time.

Must get back to work now. Hugs to one and all, Judy x

I know Helen, it sucks! How are you doing today?

Judy x

Hi Judy. I'm just muddling through. Every day is a challenge

Sorry I took so long to get back here, but I don't really have any REAL news about the breast cancer anyway -- the oncologist has me set up for Monday to have a mammogram and ultrasound on the left breast for the "new one" -- yes she felt it, and a re-biopsy on the right breast (original site) will be scheduled definitely, but not until after getting mammogram and ultrasound results -- if the "new one" looks suspicious then I get to have TWO biopsies; easier to do both on the same day. (FUN!! --NOT!) So it's almost like back to the beginning in a way.

The M-word was discussed a bit though, and while she says the person I really have to talk to in order to find out about recovery time, and how much more disabled it would make me than what I already am would be the breast surgeon, who I'll probably get connected to soon. One thing though -- she (my onc) was talking about lymph node removal as a part of my mastectomy. I said I'm really not keen on THAT seeing how there has been no indication of cancer in the nodes since I finished chemotherapy. I need to see what happens with the upcoming tests -- mammo/US and biopsies first before any serious plans are made. Chemo brain hit me because while we were talking about the mastectomy stuff, I forgot to mention that big study recently which showed that lymph node dissection and removal make no difference in survival rate unless the patient actually has cancer in the nodes.  Meaning I'll have to remember to tell her about that in two weeks when I see her again about the mammo/US results because I do NOT want the lymphedema risk.  I got ENOUGH wrong with me as it is. NO MORE!

Oh and speaking of things wrong with me, I saw the psychotherapist today...I did mention that I was going to have counseling/cognitive behavior therapy up here right? I was not even able to answer most of her questions/tell her what she wanted to know regarding my feelings and so on without busting into tears, and forget about describing the background and context she needs to know in order to even be ABLE to help me. I think I'm having a good old fashioned nervous breakdown.

Hmmm, what else...I don't get this one but I was actually more stressed out for yesterday's onc appointment than any of the others to date, and my Pack Rat went WITH ME this time. Go figure.....

After the oncologist he showed me the food co-op up in Lebanon he'd been telling me about since it's a hop skip and a jump out of Dartmouth. I needed to buy fresh fruit and salad stuff...so I'm restocked on GOOD food, plus, oh, those bell peppers they had, all colors, all fresh -- I bought some to make Italian Rainbow for dinner. Which was yummy but we really stunk up the place -- I had to spray air freshener in the BEDROOM. Ewwww... LOL. Kinda cool also -- Pack Rat can "work from home" in MY computer room/office. All he has to do is bring his laptop with Pro-Engineer and his webcam, I shut down my Mini and he uses the Mini's KVM plug -- easy to get at -- so he gets my big screen (and the webcam can sit on the hutch shelf). Plus he has Skype so he can consult with his manager (or manager can get hold of him) as needed. And if I want to be on the computer too, I can use my iBook.  He did that yesterday afternoon when we got back from Dartmouth.

Gosh I don't even have my time sequence straight, I keep bouncing and bouncing. Oh well I guess that's normal for having a nervous breakdown, right?

Uggggh snow tomorrow, almost a foot of it! Glad I did laundry on Monday plus bought the fresh fruit and veggies yesterday so I can hide in the house, but crapola I am soooo sick and tired of winter and cold weather already. And next week my Pack Rat has his week working in CT.

Hope you all feel as well as possible.....