My Kids

Bobbie - No ideas but wanted to let you know you are all in my prayers.  It's so hard to get kids to use constructive outlets for their anger and frustration under normal circumstances, at least it's a challenge at our house.  I can't imagine how hard this has to be for all of you.

Bobbie-  I am so sorry you are having to deal with all of this.  My 10 year old was having discipline issues at school, but they were mainly caused by learning difficulties.  He has dysgraphia and the process of writing is EXTREMELY time consuming for him.  We tried getting him assistance with an IEP in the school, but apparently the main concern was getting him through the SOL rather than developing lifetime learning skills. Meanwhile he was hating school and I received regular notes home and he had multiple detentions.  I felt like the academic system was working against him and myself.  The final straw for me was when my son had to spend field day, two days before the end of third grade, in the principals office.  And this for not finishing a writing assignment and with an IEP for writing!spent  field day. 

OK I didn't mean to make this long winded, but we ended up pulling him and homeschooling.  I pulled both my 2nd and 4th grader and the difference for both of them has been amazing.  This certainly hasn't been easy, but the results I am beginning to see have made it worth it.  It was an extreme response pulling them, but I just saw things getting worse and he was being left behind.  We have one boy in our homeschooling field trip group who actually has a professional homeschool teacher.  His sister is going through chemo right now so he staying with his Dad in DC and being homeschooled.  

I guess I'm just saying there are options beyond the large classroom that you may want to explore.  He may need a smaller setting so that he feels like he is more of a significant player.The public schools now have so many kids in each classroom the teachers just can't give the kind of attention some kids need. He certainly is not in control of what is happening in his life right now and bullying I am sure is his way to regain some say.  He wants to be able to control something.  Your son is going through an incredibly difficult time and I am so sorry you are having to deal with all of this.

Praying for you,

Susan 

I'm sorry no advice either but my prayers & thoughts are with you during this difficult time. 

Gosh it really sounds like he just needs some extra help. I am so so sorry you are going through this! After the hurricane there is a rainbow. One day soon I pray you see your rainbow:)

Bobbie - I am so sorry you are going through this.  How hard it must be for you trying to deal with so much and working through this time with your son.  It does sound like he's acting out in anger, but because he is 10 yrs old he doesn't know the best place to direct his anger.  I don't know if you've already done this, but would a talk with his teacher or principal help?  Do they have ideas or suggestions?  I'm sending you a huge bear ((((HUG))))).

here - have a laugh

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_c6HsiixFS8

Bobbie,

 Did you speak to his guidance counselor at school? I'm sure they can help him. When my son was in elementary school, he was acting out and the guidance counselor really helped. Hugs to you! 

OK I was long winded last time, but thought I'd pass on a thought a friend told me while I was struggling.  Her son had had issues and she reminded me that this is only a small bump in the big scheme of things.  Eventually he'll be telling his kids how difficult he was and what a great support his mother was during his roughest times.  You are doing an awesome job (I know because I can "hear" how much you care).

Be proud that you are stepping up to the challenge,

Susan 

Bobbie, God Bless You. You are an amazing woman! I agree with Sherri, it's so hard sometimes

to understand our circunstances, why God would allow them. I believe, at this point your doing the best you can. I have a ten year old daughter, let me tell you, this is not my sweet child of two years ago. She is starting puberty young, she's tall, and that alone can make a child angry.Lets through cancer , and life's major trials in the mix and you have a pretty tough combination going on. Bobbie, Pray, just pray give your dear son who is going through so much to God, He will watch over him and take care of him. I do believe in thie Power of Prayer!

I will be praying for you, your DH, and your son. I will pray that God will bring him peace in his heart, he really needs that right now, he's scared and just expressing in ithe wrong ways. He will

be O.K.

Stay strong sister!!!

You inspire Me!

Stephanie

Bobbie, I can't say anything that hasn't already been mentioned here.  Love and patience with your son.  He is going through so much, so unfair!  When your dear husband finds peace I hope he shines a multitude of rainbows on you guys!!!  Love and strength to you.

Bobbie - I deal with the same sort of thing with my Grandaughter. Her IQ is 68 and since my diagnosis her anger is terrible. We have her in Twae Kwon Do (sp). It seems to help. As far as the IEP look for a child advocate in your area. I would think that he should be able to use a netbook or laptop to complete assignments. They have to make accommendations. At his age I would let him start attending the IEP meetings and hear what they are saying and be able to answer back about what might help him. That also gives him a little bit of ownership and a sense of being part of the solution. GD is the 3rd child I've raised with an IEP and the biggest thing I've learned is to be pro-active and fight for your child.

Hope something here helps and know that our family will be praying for you and yours.

Bobbie, just joining in on the prayers and thoughts for you and your boy.

Do you have a local organization such as CancerCare? They offer all sorts of support groups and even various workshops for children and teens.

Your plan for him sounds good and solid- and, most importantly, he has a great mom in you, so he will be okay.

xo

janyce