Sitting here crying, alone.

(((((geogal)))))

Whoa there, girl! Many stage 3 have had good lives after treatment. You are not a statistic, you are you.

Staging is a treatment tool. Treatment for stage 3 is generally more aggressive, which is a good thing, no? It doesn't mean that you have one foot in the grave and the other on a banana peel. it means that you have locally advanced, but not systemic disease.

 We all want to forget this part of our lives "journey". After treatment, many of us do just that.

 Does this mean that you don't have a serious condition? No, you do, but there are options available to you. Take heart at the postings of many other triple pos - many are years out and living well (emphasis on the "living")

 None of this is easy, but you are not alone. You have a question? Post it. Someone will get you a response. You feel tired, alone, scared? We all have at one point, and there would be something wrong if you didn't.

You will get through this. Don't get caught up in survival rates - the only one that matters in your case is your own. Choose your treatment plan wisely,make things as simple as possible for the times that you might be subpar and then focus on living with CA, not dying from it.

Take care, it does get better! 

(((Geogal))),

I'm sorry this nast s*#t is getting you down.  It's natural to feel the way you are now.  I did too when I saw what stage I was.  But we are here to tell you there is light at the end of the tunnel.  I'm 4 weeks out from my reconstruction and other than being a bit sore and tired I actually don't dwell on the stage thing too much anymore.  

You will make it through this, and we'll be here to help if you need us!

Sharon

The stage 3 thing freaked me out pretty badly in the beginning, too.  It really is just a tool, though, and those survival stats are constantly changing - so much that they are nearly meaningless at any given point in time.  I just set my mind to the thought that it didn't matter what my odds were, that even if I was looking at 50%, I just had to plan to be in the good 50%!  You'll get the most aggressive treatment and with triple positive, there's so much out there for you to fight this thing.  Check out the 5 years out thread -very uplifting.  ((hugs))  It really does get better.

geogal, I went through similar emotions when I learned I was stage IIIa.  In reality, it's not that big a difference from stage 2's.  Also, cure rates for stage 3's are getting better and better.  The odds are still in our favor.  

I had neoadjuvant chemo as well because of the nodes that were readily apparent on my MRI.  I'm glad we went that route, because then we were able to see what the response was after treatment.   

What you're going through is very normal.  The more you read on here, the more you will see that many stage 3's do very well.   That doesn't mean it's not still scary, it certainly is.  

{Hugs}  

geogal - Hang in there.  I do think crying is therapeutic whether you're crying alone or with someone.  The beautiful thing about this Board is that even when you're home alone you're not (we're just a keystroke away).  I just got my Dx of IDC yesterday and don't know my stage yet.  I think I'm doing surgery first and then chemo but haven't met with the onc yet so he may want to reverse that order...  Take care of yourself, stay connected here, and let yourself cry when you need to.  Hugs to you!

Hi Geogal

I was in the same position as you 6 years ago except I was a stage IIIB. I am now doing fine and in August passed my 5 year milestone. I know how you feel.  I couldn't stand looking at the survival statistics but you have to believe that you will be on the positive end of those statistics.Hang in there! Sending you positive thoughts and hugs.

dina

geogal:  I just found out two days ago that I, too, had changed from what I thought was a 2 to a 3A. I cried, but then I realized what a lot of these ladies are pointing out. Survival rates are a statistic only, they are an AVERAGE of all bc survivors. You are you, and your survival is based on you and your bc--and it looks like you have some good traits for your particular bc.

Another thing someone pointed out to me: Does it change your treatment plan? Probably no. You were probably going to have surgery and chemo anyway (rads?).

Hang in there. There are so many of us going through this that we won't let you lose hope.

 Hang in there. It's OK to cry. Please note that Stage IIIA is considered early stage.

They all thought I was stage IIIA before surgery. Ended up being a stage IIB but really not that much different from Stage IIIA. If you want to look at statistics they are in your favor for survival if you do treatment.My treatment more than doubled my 10 year survival/NED rate!

Do not look at the stats online. I find they are dated and not based on your specific case. My onc gave me specific statistics based on my case and the therapy I had (surgery/chemo/herceptin/Als). The online stats don't give you that information.

Also cancermath.net is not only old information, there is a disclaimer that says it isn't accurate for tumors like ours that are over 5cm.

Finally you will be getting Herceptin. This is the newest drug out. It great improves our survival as HER2+. Many think it's the miracle drug.

BTW have you checked out the triple positive group thread?

geogal: I am considered IIIA ,or so the paper work says. Go ahead and cry and, then decide that you are going to fight and win this battle. I had to realize that I am not going anywhere until it is my time. Drs or Statistics can't put a time stamp on my life because it is not up to them. I was diagnosed in 2009 with IDC. I have had a mastectomy,chemo and radiation. I am going to live and not die. My trust is not in the Drs., but in the Lord.

My DH said that he was expecting to have to carry me from chemo treatment,when I was standing over him and saying let's go (he had fallen asleep) he thought that I hadn't gotten my treatment and was surprised at how well I was doing.

Carolyn

I originally thought I was IIIA too but turned out to be IIIC.  That sucks too.  Haven't started my treatment yet.. Hang in there!

geogal: I remember my own shock when I came to after surgery and found out about my lymph nodes, making me a stage IIIa. Here I am, one year later, and I feel great! I know what is ahead of you feels frightening, but you will get through it, and you have a lot of great women (and a few men!) on your side.

One love, Jackie 

I know how you feel, things hit you sometimes and it's hard to deal with at that time.  I try not to look at stats myself or stages...I just look at it as I have bc, nothing more.  I found early on they got me depressed.  I just had my BMX a month ago and it went great & was much easier than I thought it would be.  We're here for you so, hang in there.  You're +++ it's a good thing plus at III you usually get everything and the kitchen sink thrown at you!

Geogal.....I marked 5 years from Dx on the 3rd of this month.....I had bilat, chemo, rads, ooph and endured AI's for 3 1/2 years.....am I the person I was before Dx....no, but I am here and doing pretty good....Stage 3 is scary, but then again, that gets us all the available Tx...as Bugs said, check out the 5 year said here on stage III...one day you'll be there too.......

geogal,  I to was told at time of dx I was a stage 1, then biopsy told stage 2 and then when I woke up from my  bilateral mastectomy still druged, guess what I am now a 3a...  I, like you, cried...just don't let your mind so to places it don't need to be... I was there for about to two days and then I said to heck with this... I am a strong person and this was not going to get me down.,. FIGHT with everything you have.  Leave nothing behind..  I will start on Arimdex on March 1st so I maybe this will keep the beast at bay...  I pray to God every day...  My BS has said from the very 1st day that this is treatable so I am on his train.... ((((Hugs))) and come here these women are wonderful and always know what to say and when to say it...  Prays to all..