June 2010 Mastectomy
Comments
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I'm sure you will look beautiful. The nipples make such a huge difference. I just posted my nipple/areola pictures over on the picture site, if you want to go take a look. I hadn't looked at my pre-NAC surgery pictures in a long time. I am sooooooo glad I did the nipple. For me, it was a really important and crucial step in my getting back to a semblance of normal.
Good thing it's been such a cold winter. The cones are easier to hide that way. Will you be able to take a peek at the nipples when they remove the bandages?
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Joystars So sorry about your beautiful hair! It's a woman's crowning glory. Hope that's your only side effect and you remain healthy, strong and positive through it all. The experiences you have with Vida Sofia will outshine all the difficulties, I am sure. Just look into her eyes as you interact with her and you will see the love and joy reflected back to you! God bless you, dear!
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Getty- I will get to peek at the nips on the 18th. I went to the pic forum- you look AMAZING!! Your PS did a wonderful job, no wonder you are so happy and able to put so much of this behind you.
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Laurie: Thanks so much! It's really scary putting pictures up on a forum for others to see.
I will be waiting to hear all the good news from your sneak peek next week.
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I know what you mean about putting the pictures out there for others to see. It made me nervous too. I did take pic's of myself before my surgery and will take after pic's too and post them.
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Let me know when they're up and I'll go over and take a look.
How are you feeling?
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I'm feeling pretty good. This surgery was definitely much easier. I am tired of course. The pain meds have been doing their job I decided to make some soup today and that actually ended up being more than I should have done. I'm a little more uncomfortable tonight. But I have actually been sleeping on my side at night if you can believe it. My PS kind of cracks me up. I asked him when I could sleep on my side- he said when ever it was comfortable for me. I told him how a lot of the other ladies weren't allowed to...he shrugged his shoulders and smiled. I said, so I can sleep on my side but I can't shower and I have to wear these things for 8 weeks. He smiles and says "if you're good maybe only 6 weeks."
Tomorrow the boys are going to my in laws for the day and hubby will be at work again. I am hoping to wash my hair in the sink and maybe get some work done, end the day with a movie on the couch. I am really trying to let myself heal this time and not do so much. I'll be sure to let you know when I put more pics up.
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Lol at the six weeks! I hope it works out that way.
My PS always looked puzzled when I told him about restrictions that other ladies on here have. He doesn't say much. He's definitely on the "do whatever" side of PS's. I've incorporated some of the advice that some ladies have gotten from their PS, but I definitely sleep on my side (and love it!). I am amazed that you're managing to do it so soon after your exchange, though.
Enjoy your day today. Good luck washing your hair in the sink.
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I had my unveiling today! Everything looks pretty darn good. The nipples he made are nice and pink and are healing well. The implants look good too, I will enjoy getting a better look at them after my shower, first one in a week!! I think I am going to be very happy with the end results. I have a bumpy rash all over my chest where the tape and gauze was, I think my poor skin was starved for some air. But it has it now, thank God! I will admit getting nips is weird, from having them to not having them, to now having them again- but made by a person. I think all it just takes some getting used to.
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Yay! So glad you're happy with the results so far. Remember that the look will only get even better as the implants settle in and your skin and muscles relax to accommodate the implants. The whole journey has been weird. That's why I'm so glad I have you all here. No one else could really understand how bizarre it all is.
In other news ... I finally started on Tamoxifen today. So far, so good ... I hope I get to be in the 23% that reports weight loss as a side effect. I could stand to lose a bit after the holidays. :-/
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speech, thank youuuuuu! Your kind words just put a smile on my face right now! you are so right!
How are you doing these days? Sending you many hugs back!
Wow Laurie I'm very happy for you! New nipples, new implants, new you!
I can just try to imagine how it was for you... all these days waiting to know how all will look like and voila! seems like your patience paid good. And I agree with getty, it will get better and better in the coming days/weeks.
I'm not there yet, for me there is still a loooong way before starting to think about reconstruction, TE, implants, nipples(!?)... but is good to read you both so I have a better idea of what to expect and how things will be. For this and for other things, thank you Laurie and Getty for sharing here your experiences.... you really really bring lots of hope to this kinda fat bald first time mum :P
Getty, about Tamoxifen I'm happy to know that until now all seems good. I'm gonna start it sometime in summer, once I finsih the FEC chemo. Will see how it goes, what scares me the most are the SE.
Sorry girls, need to vent here. I miss my hair, I really do. Having Vida Sofia is one of the bestest things that could ever happened to me, she keeps me quite busy all day and I feel so much love and tenderness when she is in my arms. However there's these moments when I'm alone (event tho mum and DH are around) and stupid fear thoughts come to my mind. I see pictures on Facebook of my friends, we are all the same age early 30's and I see how they all are having their lifes, going to parties, to work, traveling.... all this with HAIR and no chemos no surgeries. I dunno if I make sense now. It's tough, sometimes I cry a lot but then I go and get angry, very angry... stupid cancer you tried to take one of the biggest blessings in life from me: to give life! and you did not succed. But you took my breast and my hair.... my messy crazy hair.
I'm wearing head scarves at home and the wig to go out with a knitted hat on, it's cold out there... I'm silly, the wig has a pet name now too. I should feel lucky as I didn't pay one cent for it and it's a natural hair one and most of the people and friends can't notice its a wig... which is nice but is not the same like to have my OWN hair.... oh well it's a process I guess.
Ok, should stop now before start crying and feel sorry for myself again (and again, and again...) hope everyone is having a good week so far.
Hugs!
Joy
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Joystars-This is a copy of a post I wrote when I was wondering myself about scarf-tying:
I'm sure you've figured it all out, but for others out there that are wondering, I have found some suggestions:
http://www.kangausa.com/tie,traditionalheadwrap.htm
http://www.kangausa.com/tie,backtwistturban.htm
http://www.4women.com/fabrics/silk/
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VfDuz8-mKvw
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aVA865WgjQs&feature=related
I'm starting chemo in a month and was horrified how the wigs that I've tried looked and felt on me! Then I tried some "chemo scarfs" (pre-tied) and they made me feel really "old lady-ish" and they were expensive. I'm only 48 and still try to be a little hip (O.K., I'm sure I don't manage it, but at least I'm trying!) so I was really upset about having to look dumpy for 7 months. I feel dumpy enough as it is having to be a patient and having one breast lopped off! I mean, after 40, my best body parts have been my breasts and hair! Anyway, after seeing some of these web sites and YouTube tutorials I am now excited about trying out all the styles. Since most of the styles are african, some of them might look a little too ethnic on american-norwegian me, but they are really easy to do and certainly don't look too "fiddler on the roof"! Anyway, I just wanted to share my research!
I am living in Oslo too so feel free to PM me about anything. I was done with chemo and rads last May and I am feeling great now. Fretex is a good place to find cheap scarves. Good luck!
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krcll, thank you very VERY much for the links, working on them right now!
And OMG you live in Oslo as well, that's great. I've been wondering if really no one in Oslo knew about these discussion boards full of information, strong ladies and a perfect space to vent...
Where did you have your treatment? I'm at Ulleval.
Hoping everyone had a nice weekend....
Joy
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Hi Joy!
I read your post last week from my work computer and wanted to wait to get home to comment. And then the crazy survey BC.org put up took over my computer and I couldn't get it off the screen to read the boards. Very frustrating! Finally, this morning, I was able to sign on without getting attacked by the pop-up!
I'm sorry that you've been dealt such a rough hand in the middle of what should be a time full of happiness and enchantment for your family. I'm glad that krcil stopped by with links for the head scarf. This is the venting place, though, so come in and blow off some steam. The good news, though I know it must be hard to see right now, is that the hair will grow back when the chemo is finally behind you. Reconstruction will make things better. I like angry better than sad. I think the anger moves us to action.
I loved the avi you had of the three of you! I also love the new one today.
On the Tamoxifen front, it's been 6 days and still no side effects. I know that it takes two weeks for it to reach it's full effect in the body, but I'm encouraged that so far not even a little twinge of anything has shown up. If anything, I'm sleeping better, which probably has nothing to do with anything.
Have a good week!
Getty
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Joy- I am so sorry that things are so hard right now. To watch everyone else your age flying through life with out having any of the difficulties you are having must be so hard. Try to remember that it's only temporary and the hair will be back. Not that it makes it any better for the moment, but try to keep your eye on the light at the end of this wretched tunnel, try not to let the darkness in. I agree with Getty I prefer anger to sadness myself. Sadness makes me feel weak, I hate that feeling.
Getty- I am so glad that so far you haven't had any of the negative side effects! I hope it continues for you and that perhaps you are in the minority that may even get to enjoy weight loss:) Keep getting good sleep and healing yourself. You have been such inspiration to me through all this.
Today is my first day without restrictions and I can lift the boys again. So today things are back to normal. My husband was great through everything, he didn't clean too much but he kept up on the laundry, so I'll take it! I have been cleaning this morning and we are having some friends over to play in just a little bit. I have a feeling I will be napping aith the boys this afternoon. But, hey at least I have the option right?
I hope everyone is doing well and staying warm, in NH today it was -10 when I got up, right now it is a balmy 1. The wood stove feels goog though!!
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Joystars- I've recommended it to several norwegian BC sisters, but I think that the fact that everything is in English (with all the specialized BC terminology) can be a hindrance as well as not everyone wants to know so much about their cancer. I have had to work hard to accept that everyone is different in this regard because I am the type that wants to know as much as possible. I actually know at least 2 women that were just finished with treatment and didn't know what ER+ or HER2+ was and couldn't tell what they were! But who is to say that my way is any better than theirs? But I do think there may be more of a tradition to trust your doctor more in Norway and not to ask too many questions- after all he/she is the expert. Just a theori I have....
Yes, I go to Ullevål, too. My onc is the wonderful, fabulous EW (don't know if it is OK to write a doctor's name here). If you want to talk or get together, PM me and I'll give you my phone number. -
Laurie: You've been a big inspiration to me also, as Joy has been. I think we've done a good job holding each other up. Thank God for this thread and the ladies here! I hope you had a great day lifting and playing with those two beautiful boys. And I hope you got your well deserved nap in. Did you get to talk to your PS today about your concerns?
We had a new patient come in to the chiropractic office today. He was visiting from NH. Boy, was he happy to be missing the cold! We hit 80 degrees today. It was a lot warmer than the forecasts.
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Getty- No, I didn't call the PS. I got a couple of very nice PM's from other women who helped put my mind at ease. The ache I was having "suddenly" in my breasts another lady made me think if I had changed bra's etc. Ummm- yup. I had been wearing my mastectomy bra 24/7 and then started wearing a regular one during the day and nothing at night...I started wearing the mastectomy bra at night again and the discomfort was gone. Also the yellowing was very slight, I wouldn't have thought much of it if it weren't for the discomfort, the two together got me paranoid. Again PM's from other gone before me allowed me to really calm down, look and think. There is no black and the color is just slightly different and does look like bruising, it already looked better 24 hours later and was looking more pink. Sometimes I am my own worse enemy I think.
I will say that I am about to head to bed and man, after a full day with the boys my peck muscles are screaming and I am pooped. It felt good to be Mom today and my oldest must have kissed me a thousand times and told me how happy he was that we could be just "you, me and Mason." His words ♥ (Mason is my other son)
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What troopers your boys have been! I'm happy it was just the three of you today, too! Back to normal ...
(And I'm glad your worries were relieved.)
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krcll- I completely agree with you! I also wanted to know as much as possible where was I standing and which steps will follow. When I had my first appointment with the fabulous doctor EW (yes, hes is my oncologist and I'm so glad he is!) I arrived with a notebook full of questions and doubts and literally "atacked" him with them all. He was quite surprised to see "how well informed" I was. Well... thanks to all the people on this thread! (Getty, Laurie, Jeanne, Lizzy, Orchigdal... etc)
I just love this forum! Found it just a week after my diagnosis when I was a complete mess, clueless and unaware of the medical terminology, its meaning and so on. Back then, I remember so well spending hours and hours reading and reading the different threads here, trying to make sense of what was going in my life.... and it certainly helped A LOT! Then I found this thread, the June Mastectomy, where I felt fully understood and not longer alone. Here my BC sisters helped me to go thru all this process pre surgery and post... the day I walked thru those surgery room doors, I was at peace. I knew what was coming.
I've been living in Norway since 2007 but not being a fluent "norsk" speaker (I'm Mexican married to a French) made things hard too, there was no chance for me to join any of the cancer organizations speeches, chats or activities as all of them were only in Norwegian. Even the booklets and brochures! Really crazy and unfair if you ask me, I agree all of us, inmigrants, should get involved in the new culture and place they live, but we are talking about big organizations that are supposed to provide help, support and information to cancer patients in a city that has so many inmigrants from all around the world. Anyways, that's not the point here....
I'm glad you came here to post, sending you a PM right now!
Getty- I'm so happy that you still take some of your time to come here and keep an eye on us. Thank you. You girls have been a real support for me in tough times. My DH is next to me and supports me no matter what. But only us, the ones that go thru this process, can truly understand what it is like.
I agree with you and Laurie, anger moves us to action. Tho sometimes all I can do is cry, that helps a bit every now and then.
Laurie- I second Getty's words, you've been an inspiration for me as well. Having two kids and being a full time mom while going thru this.. respect!
I'm glad that you are slowly coming back to the normal family life with the boys. Big hugs for you 3.
About the hair, I'm slowly getting used to wear a wig everytime I'm out. At home I usually wear the head scarves (which by the way I keep practising the techniques and styles) or a simple hat.
I'm not sure I can do this but I do use hair clips and head bands ON the wig as I think it helps to make it look more "natural". Would like to post a pic here but have no idea how to. Laurie, do you think you can help me with this? as you already posted a picture of your boys. Thanks in advance.
Joy
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Joy- I read on another thread that if you have Facebook you can simply right click on the image you have posted there and hit copy image and then hit paste in the box where you type!
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YAYYY!!! Thanks Laurie, it worked!
\:D/
So that's me, my DH AND my wig :P
Picture was taken today: a lovely sunny morning! -
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Yay Joy! Baby Vida is so sweet! Both pictures are fantastic. I think you look great! Remember to come back often now and show us more pics of you and Vida ♥
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Laurie: That picture made me smile. He is a cutie!
Joy: You are beautiful! What happy pictures! No one could say that you're wearing a wig under that hat. And of course I'll keep coming back here. I feel we are friends now and I want to know how you ladies are doing.
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Hello ladies! I have been hiding out in denial again..........ugh! Finally got my date for my exchange surgery - February 11. I cannot wait to get these expanders out! It will be 8 months exactly from my bmx to exchange.
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Hi Jeanne! It's great to "see" you here. Denial is a great place to hide. I go there often, as in "This didn't really happen to me." You are going to feel sooooooo much better once you have your implants in! You'll see ...
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