Nervous Wreck

(((((Nancy)))))

It is very, very hard Nancy.  The effects are cumulative and our poor bodies have never been treated like this.  Ask the oncologists office what you can do to feel better.  I wish I had ideas, here, but I don't.  Just lots of caring and Giant Hugs.  G.

Nancy...what type recon?  I don't remember how long my surgery was, a few  hours, but it was bilatt with expanders, so not as "complicated" as some types of recon.  Hugs

Nancy,

I hate to hear the dispair in your post. I'm sorry that you feel so discouraged. I can't speak to the side effects of Taxotere but I wanted to mention that the only way to know for sure that your tumors are entirely cleared up is after surgery based on the path report. Maybe you can speak to your oncologist and surgeon about having surgery next and then based on the report decide whether to go forward with the Taxotere. Many women have neoadjuvent chemo and post surgery chemo so maybe this will work for you too. Hopefully, some others who have had Taxotere will be along to encourage you.

 I hear you about wanting to live life normally again. I think that is something that we all strive for. The follow-up you receive after treatment should be something that you are comfortable with. However, try to remember that this time you recurred and had no symptoms and because you had follow-up and a great PS you are able to be treated at an early stage and after treatment you will be able to live life!

Also, since your tumor is still estrogen positive, I would be surprised if your oncologist doesn't want you to be treated with an AI after you finish chemotherapy. That's for down the road. Remember...baby steps. It will get better! Hugs.

Nancy, I'm sending positive energy and prayers your way. I haven't done chemo, so I can't speak to what you're going through except to identify with the ptsd. It's like you're in the middle of a huge battle right now, going through a very tough, traumatic ordeal and you're doing so great just to be courageous enough to write about it and verbalize your frustration and anger. That's a huge part of healing, so don't feel bad about doing it and don't feel guilty about how your family might react to what you're saying on this site. This is your forum for getting things off your chest and you utilize it like a champion. I'm new here and I've already learned so much from you, so Thank You! And give yourself a hug from all of us on here. I agree wholeheartedly with some of the other ladies, that you caught this recurrence early by the dilligence of your doc who didn't like the way your breast tissue looked even though all the tests came out clear. Ignorance is bliss only for a little while. You'll have good quality of life again, but for now try to just get through today. And please know that for some of us, you're the best "I Hate Cancer!" spokesperson we know.

If Taxotere is like Taxol (they're cousin drugs) you'll feel FANTASTIC for the rest of the evening ...and want to sleep all day tomorrow.  I think it's the extra steroids.

I loved Taxol (well, compared to A/C) -- I used to stop in to see my work buddies on the way home from chemo I felt so good. 

And soon ... no mo' chemo !

Nancy....me three....I agree with G and Sherri......Wishing you an easy time through Tx and do what you need to do to take care of yourself....(((((((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))

Hi Nancy,

 I have not been on BCO in a while so just now seeing your story. I am so sorry you are going through all of this. I had dd AC and Taxol in 2005. I had very little symptoms of the Neulasta with the AC but after my first Taxol - the pain, especially in my legs was awful - Vicodin did not touch it. I called my onc in tears (and I have a high pain tolerance) ready to quit too. They ordered me something stronger for the pain and then switched me from Neulasta to Neupogen for the rest of my treatments. The pain took several days to finally go away - even with the stronger pain meds. The Neupogen did help, the pain was not nearly as severe, the only drawback was I had to go to the hospital daily for the shots - can't remember now but maybe for three or four days after the Taxol infusion. You might want to ask if you can do this. Hope you get relief from the pain soon!

Nancy,  I think suzfive's information is helpful.  Maybe the oncologist can prescribe Neupogen and a more effective pain regime.  I wish I knew something more to help.  When our body is full of these drugs we are so weak.  I'm sorry you are enduring this and hope you get some relief very soon.  (((((Nancy)))))

Nancy, I'm sorry you're having a hard time. I'm praying things will get easier for you. I'm hoping you Dr was able to give you something for the pain.

Thinking of you.  (((((Nancy)))))

Hi,

I did TCH (taxotere)  My problem was that my red blood cell count dropped about 3 into the chemo and so I was very weak.  Other than that it was the Neulasta shot that did me in for a few days after every chemo.  But it was doable.  I am here still 2 years later. ( ) 

YES!  It is a side effect of the chemo, the anti-nausea drugs, and above all the pre-treatment steroids.  When we come off those each time we just crash emotionally.  I cried, too, lots.  Everyone's body is affected differently.  I tend to have very strong reactions to any drug.  Even foods affect me more.  I guess it's how my liver enzymes work or something.  There is no telling how each person will do with these treatments.  That's why we must communicate to the doctors what we're experiencing so they can help.  It's so perceptive of you to know when it's not just the circumstances that are driving the emotions.  I really hated being so out of control. I hope you are getting the help you need with all of this.  There is no such thing as too much TLC.