T3N1M0 is locally advanced or early stage?

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  • KerryMac
    KerryMac Member Posts: 3,529
    edited January 2011

    I agree with the inappropriateness of dobbins_margies statement - and someone should tell that to all our long term Stage 3C'ers - I can think of at least a dozen, without really even trying.

    Stage 3 is still considered curable, all of Stage 3. Otherwise it would be Stage 4. Sheesh. 

  • LindaLou53
    LindaLou53 Member Posts: 929
    edited January 2011

    As another stage 3C'er here I want to respectfully thank Beesie also for her informed posts and ongoing support to all women on these forums. 

  • dobbins_margie
    dobbins_margie Member Posts: 13
    edited January 2011

    My apologies to everyone for my previous post here. I spoke without knowledge; and didn't make what I wanted to say understandable at all. I just read back and realize that I got too wrapped up in details and/or reading. Yes, I agree that there are survivors of ALL breast cancers; and I truly care about all of you. Please accept my sincere apology and know that my tone and mood when I enter this discussion forum is one of caring and sincerity.

    God Bless!!!

    dobbins_margie

  • Beesie
    Beesie Member Posts: 12,240
    edited January 2011

    DCMom, my apologies if my post offended you or bothered you in any way. I was not suggesting at all that the prognosis for those who are Stage III is dire. In fact what I said was that "Because these additional treatments are given, those who are higher stage may be able to reduce their risk of recurrence to levels that are similar to those who are lower stage who do not get these same treatments."   With my post I was simply trying to provide some factual information about staging, because in many of the discussions lately in this forum and others, there has been a frightening lack of facts. Lots of people have given their opinions - often stated as fact - and yet many of these opinions are quite different than the true facts. 

    I agree with you that I should not be posting in this forum. I happen to be one of the minority here who believes that all the Stage forums should be respected. Until I responded to the thread started by AgentMo, I don't think I'd ever responded to a post in this forum before and I very rarely read posts in this forum. I saw this thread only because I'd been continuing to follow the thread started by AgentMo and had noticed that she hadn't posted for quite a few days. I was concerned that some of the disrespectful and rude responses in her thread might have caused her to leave the board and I was pleased to see that she had posted.  That's how I found this thread.  I should not however have posted my response and I apologize again.  

    Sherri and LindaLou, thank you!  

  • LindaLou53
    LindaLou53 Member Posts: 929
    edited January 2011

    Margie, the ability to accurately say what we mean can sometimes be a difficult task for all of us. Especially on internet forums where what is in our heart, mind and intentions cannot always be easily communicated.  I think there is not one of us who hasn't accidentally put our foot in our mouth, or realized later that there might be negative interpretations of something we said but did not intend in that light.

    The bottom line is we each come here at whatever point we are at in our breast cancer journey, and with whatever understanding we have gleaned from the overwhelming amount of information we must try to absorb.  It is an ongoing process and I don't believe any of us ever reach a state of perfect comprehension. 

    That is why it is so great that we can all share with and learn from each other.  We expose our minds to other's perspectives, try our best to communicate our own experience and viewpoint, and ultimately take away what we find to be most helpful to us as individuals.

    Margie there is no need to apologize to me but I accept your sincerity and good intentions.  Smile

  • Bugs
    Bugs Member Posts: 1,719
    edited January 2011

    Just piping in to add my support to Beesie.  She has always been very supportive in this forum and defensive to our stage 3 sisters.   I suppose if one were to read only her post on this thread it would sound dire.  However, having read her defense of "stage doesn't matter" posts on other threads she was just stating that yes, in most cases it does.

    I sure hope this doesn't turn into another bickering thread.  My sistahs shouldn't have to suffer with me posting all those pictures...don't put them through that, k?  Kiss

  • maryannecb
    maryannecb Member Posts: 1,453
    edited January 2011

    Group hug!!!! All stages/ grades and types.

    Fear is fear. Some of his have a little...others ..a lot.

    Getting a cancer diagnosis no matter the stage is a loss of health...a reminder of our mortality.

     I remember feeling this even when I got a very minor skin cancer in my 30'3...WTF  I mutated???

    Being a higher stage only determined my treatment. Improved but did not abolish my chance of recurrence.

    As I can't control what hapens next ..I have worked really hard to believe that I will not be facing this again. And jeesh...5 years later...I just may be right. And if I am wrong..well at least I lived in La La land..it is nice here.

    I welcome any posters to stage 3 board. I feel just as bad for someone diagnosed with lower stage cancer..they are scared too. If any discussions on our board are relevant to your situation or you want to support a friend..why not come here?

    Down with Breast Cancer

  • luv_gardening
    luv_gardening Member Posts: 1,393
    edited January 2011

    What we need is more research into the methods used by the cancer to hibernate, how to detect if it's hiding or whether we're clear, and ways to intervene so we can all be sure it's behind us.

    Lago and Maryanne, I agree it's not helpful to concentrate on the worst scenario rather than to assume we're free to get on with our lives, otherwise we will live a miserable life and in the end we only have the present moment so why not make the most of it.

    Beesie, I welcome your comments which were well informed and impressively put and I've found this an interesting discussion.

    It's a juggling act trying to, on the one hand express our grief and fear and on the other hand try to keep upbeat and enjoy our lives without too much fear.   When one expresses fear and another is trying to look ahead to a long happy life we clash but in the end we've all been on both sides of the fence and we need to acknowledge our sisters feelings whatever their stage or outlook.

    In the end we're on the same journey.

    Love and hugs to all my wonderful sisters. (Said with tears in my eyes, literally).

  • gillyone
    gillyone Member Posts: 1,727
    edited January 2011

    Is it Iago (capital i)  or Lago?

  • luv_gardening
    luv_gardening Member Posts: 1,393
    edited January 2011

    I copied and pasted to a different font and it is a lower case L.  1 I and L can be confusing.

  • dobbins_margie
    dobbins_margie Member Posts: 13
    edited January 2011

    Thank you for accepting my apologies. I shall be very careful in my wording in the future. I still do not know how to correct what I said in the offensive post; I can say what was on my mind when I posted however. I had been reading all posts about staging and how they differ in so many ways. And I will say that when I did some reading back in 2008 during my diagnosis; according to what I read; and the older Staging Charts used prior to 2008; I would have been Stage IV instead of Stage IIIA which I was diagnosed. So the POSITIVE to my personal story is that Stages III and IV are very curable in my own personal opinion. (My negative comment was just verbalizing what I had read...and believe me; when I was researching in 2008...and at my vulnerable state of mind...I probably focused more on the negative things I read rather than the positive).

    I must say that I have spoken with many women and have heard NUMEROUS success stories; and I feel very positive for each and every one of you!!

    Thanks to God, Modern Technology, Constant Research, and Good Doctors!!  

    I hope this helps!

  • allalone
    allalone Member Posts: 448
    edited January 2011

    maryannecb : As I can't control what hapens next ..I have worked really hard to believe that I will not be facing this again. And jeesh...5 years later...I just may be right. And if I am wrong..well at least I lived in La La land..it is nice here. I welcome any posters to stage 3 board.

    My thoughts exactly - I love La La Land - I don't even know what T3N1MO means (and frankly don't particularly care, maybe I should, but I doubt whether it is relevant one way or another).

    SheilaEchidna : What we need is more research into the methods used by the cancer to hibernate, how to detect if it's hiding or whether we're clear, and ways to intervene so we can all be sure it's behind us.

    There's a new blood test on the way (3 yrs before it's on the market) that will detect minute cancer cells - isn't that good news!!!  Just imagine not having to expose ourselves to endless dangerous scans just to find if it's still there, or has come back - but I suppose they will still have to find exactly where the cancer is in our bodies. Hmmm

    Beesie and lago : your posts are always informative. Keep up the good work!

  • DCMom
    DCMom Member Posts: 624
    edited January 2011

    Beesie-  So sorry I got my gripe on to you.  I am battling a cold and felt horrible already so I think you became my scapegoat.  I just want all of the stage III girls to realize that staging is only used to direct treatment.  We IIIer's get the kitchen sink and that's as good as it gets.  After treatment the only thing left is to stay positive and stay healthy regardless of our stats.  Maryanne I think you said it very well...here's to la la land.

    I had an oncologist that felt it was his job to make sure that I knew exactly how bad it was and wouldn't let me look at the bright side of anything.  I switched oncologists and the next one immediately told me all of the positives about my specific cancer.  I really needed that glass half full oncologist to help me get through treatment.  Facts are facts, but the fact is I have a very good shot at kicking this thing. 

    To sit and argue about how bad our stats are won't change our outcome so I guess I want to keep my head in the sand until I need to know more.  I really am not against others coming across forums (I know my last post sounded that way) and I am sorry if I sent anyone running.  All information is appreciated and I learn so much from all of you.  Specific apologies to Beesie who really didn't say anything inappropriate or inaccurate. 

    On a side note:

    Sometimes I read posts where women comment about their stage and I read their byline and think how wrong they are.  Instead of wanting to correct them I am envious that they have not been told the whole story.  So now you know I am a true chicken and prefer not to know the whole truth,because what good will the truth actually do me now?

  • faithfulheart
    faithfulheart Member Posts: 544
    edited January 2011

    Hi everyone,

    I've just been reading everyones posts.  Here is my opinion,  For the women in stage 0,  God bless you,  for the woman in stage 1,  bless you,  2 may God bless and keep you NED !  For my sisters in stage 3 may God bless us and keep us NED,  for our sisters in Stage IV May God bless and heal you!

    I hate to be the messenger, but heres the deal, if your early thank God!  If your not so early thank God!  The bottom line is I am so disturbed by all this( a,b,c,) thing,  I really don't think cancer  knows what stage its in. We are here and I hate to tell you,  but I have seen stage 1 go to lV with one scan. I also have friends in stage lV that have been living with cancer for years. The bottom line is

    I agree with a lot of the women here,  staging is used for treatment use. Yes I might feel better with a

    earlier dx, but I think we would all feel better if we were never dx at all!!!  At the end of the day

    we can do all we can to stay healthy.  it's important for all women. know one knows what the future holds, We are not defined by our stage, I am trying to move on with my life. They took

    out my cancer, even at lllc, its gone!  I don't look at statistics, it's a waste of time, it is what it is.

    BC sucks! No matter what your "un" stage is!

    I pray that we will all be  wrinkled old ladies, the more wrinkles the better!  Maybe I live in denial,

    if so I am liking it here, I laugh a lot more and ever day gets better and more hopeful.

    I think thats called living!!!

    Faithful 

  • lago
    lago Member Posts: 17,186
    edited January 2011
    gillyone it's lago in "LAGO" You are not the first to get confused.
  • Mamita49
    Mamita49 Member Posts: 538
    edited January 2011

    Sherrie,

    well said.

    No stage after all treatments and cancer gone.

    i like that. 

  • gillyone
    gillyone Member Posts: 1,727
    edited January 2011

    Lago - aw shucks, I wanted to go all Shakesperean and say EE - AH - GO :)

  • SusieMTN
    SusieMTN Member Posts: 795
    edited January 2011

    wrinkled old ladies - yes! Yes, may we all be that!  Never thought I would WANT to be wrinkledLaughing  LOL! 

    I think if I am lucky enough to be around in 10 years I have a duty to come here and encourage those newly diagnose!  Just sayin..........

  • caaclark
    caaclark Member Posts: 936
    edited January 2011

    Sherri- I think you are quoting my husband.  He says all the time that I am no stage at all now.  Hope he's right.

  • DCMom
    DCMom Member Posts: 624
    edited January 2011

    Carol, SusieMTN, Mamita, SherriG, faithfulheart,

    An emphatic DITTO!!!!!!

  • libraylil
    libraylil Member Posts: 528
    edited January 2011
    lago and dc mom well stated.  Since I've had neoad chemo my oncologist tells me to not look at the initial biopsy but wait until the path report is back after the lumpectomy.  He seems to be more focused on the response/shrinkage from the chemo as mine is like lago and HER2+ and not so much on giving me a number.  dcmom I need you around with lago to give me a swift bu++ kick when I get whiney. I think about some of the women I've met in the infusion room that would love to have the option I had for surgery.  Keep rolling girls. libray lil
  • Lowrider54
    Lowrider54 Member Posts: 2,721
    edited January 2011

    I so dislike the staging thing...in 1999, I had 4 positive nodes out of 25 removed - stage II but it was just beginning to edge its way into the 5th node which would have been stage III - since not fully involved - they called me a 'tween'. 

    It has also been stated that once you are staged, that is your stage period.  I am now stage iv or am I?  Technically, I am still a 'tween' stage II - III with a distant recurrence in the bone - treatable but considered terminal.  Apparently, you are only stage iv if that is at the get go.  ARRGGG - whatever...I had it, I cut it out, I did my chemo and it was gone - for 10 1/2 years.  It made a reappearance and I will be treating in some form or another forever but I am going to go right on living until I am old and wrinkly sitting in the rocker on the back porch. 

    Whatever I am - I am living with it!

    LowRider

  • kimf
    kimf Member Posts: 334
    edited January 2011

    Without getting into all the staging stuff, just wanted to say that I am among many who have been around over 5 years, staged IIIC, and am NED. I had pos nodes all over the place and cancer spread throughout the breast. My Oncologist says I'm basically cured. I'm good with that. :)

  • libraylil
    libraylil Member Posts: 528
    edited January 2011

    kimf    Thanks for positives from a HER2 sister.  I had to miss my post lumpy appt today because of snow. (We basically close the city in NC when it snows).  I know one lymphie was positive and have been obsessing about that.  My onco keeps telling me not to worry about the lymphies.  Nothing like hearing it from a BC survivor though to kick my bu++. 

    lowrider  (with a name like lowrider I can imagine the old part...but you definitely won't be wrinkly:)

  • NannaBaby
    NannaBaby Member Posts: 510
    edited January 2011

    I get so confused with the staging! My onc. told me I was stage 3A at first and said it was locally advanced.  But, I had neoadjuvant chemo and mastectomy.  Post surgery pathology report showed all negative nodes. So, I will never know for sure if my nodes were ever positive.  They think they were positive and chemo cleared them all.  I am still considered locally advanced although my post surgical path report says T2N0M0.

  • Mamita49
    Mamita49 Member Posts: 538
    edited January 2011

    Well, I am like I said before so Cancer free, that I can consider myself like sooooooo cancer free.

    After first surgery, than chemo I had another surgery just to make sure all is gone, and in all my breast and nodes ALL was cancer free. I had another ( second) scan of abdominal and bones last fall, plus pap test and ultra sound.

    So cancer free.

    I get more check-ups than some other women I know my age who NEVER go to have either a mammo nor other check-ups.

    I consider myself NOW so lucky to know for sure that no cancer is in my body, and I agree with Sherri

    Stage 0 

  • roseamy
    roseamy Member Posts: 29
    edited January 2011

    Hi Nannababy,

    I too was classed as locally advanced with no nodes 5cm tumor as I had skin involment, I had neo adj chemo and when I had the mx was then down to a  t2nomo.

    I am also still considered as locally advanced because that is how I first presented and was treated as such.

  • kathleen1966
    kathleen1966 Member Posts: 793
    edited February 2011

    Yes, no-one wants to be stage III. I wanted soo bad to be at least stage II after going from Stage I to stage III after surgery, due to one extra lymph node.  But everyone told me staging does determine your treatment. That is what I tell myself, I try not to think of the prognosis factors. It is not helpful.

  • kathleen1966
    kathleen1966 Member Posts: 793
    edited February 2011

    Personally, I think we are all in this together and I don't mind when a stage 1 or 0 posts on the stage III forum.  It is all ok.

  • Elizabeth1959
    Elizabeth1959 Member Posts: 346
    edited February 2011

    Kathleen

    I like your way of thinking.  Thinking about it as a treatment guideline is helpful.

    Elizabeth

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