Stage III versus lower

Maybe we should have a node pos board!  I dont know what stage I was because I had chemo before surgery and a complete response, but I know I had positive nodes before chemo.

Happy New Year Ladies!  I will try to be cooperative and figure out where I belong and stay there for 2011.  Didn't realize it meant that much to you and I don't want to cause problems.  We have enough just dealing with bc and trying to keep the Mod from cancelling our posts!  Maybe "I'll" get that Christmas Miracle I'm praying for others to get and I can leave this forum permanently!

I'm not sure what stage I am because my tumour was larger than the MRI had shown after my left mx but I really don't want to know.  I think we are all fighting this disease and the stats and staging sometimes make no sense at all anyway.  When I was on Adjuvant Online...which I don't think is very good.....it gave me a worse prognosis with a much smaller tumour size that I punched in...go figure.  The women are so wonderful on all the forums and I learn so much and I think that is important....to connect with other bc surviviors and learn from each other's experiences.  I've learned more on here than what my oncs have told me!

Happy Holidays everyone!

Personally I don't mind reading posts from other women in other stages of bc/treatment. I learn from all. BTW, I AM stage 3. 

It saddens me to see the words "US" and "THEM" and even the topic has the dreaded word "Versus" that lit the Healthcare forum on fire!!

If the topic is very specific, then no one could possibly add their two sense (pun intended), but with a general topic who's wording attracts attention, it has no bearing what the stage is. I wouldn't go on a DIEP problem thread, or HER2+ (I'm neg) as they don't fit into the knowledge and info I need.

When reading stage III threads I certainly don't get "scared"! Hey, I've lost both breasts to a very, very rare cancer that was difficult for pathology to even diagnose! My surgeon came to me in the "green room" before surgery with a Google print-out of something he had finally found the night before! I would have loved the option of chemo to save my breasts, though rads wasn't an option as the tumour was on my chest wall right over my heart.

There is so much I've learned reading through all the forums. Knowledge is power and we need some control. So there are so many journeys occurring all at the same time, that it's actually very cool that there isn't more conflicts. We are all stressed out enough without having to worry about which sand box we're allowed to play in.

'I would have love the option of chemo to save my breast'....?????  This is confusing to me.  Chemo would have save your breast?  And I'm not trying to be sarcastic.  How could this be?

If I offend anyone by posting in Stage 3 because I am "only" Stage 1, I apologize.  However, if I see information that I would like to share, like I did in posting the recent clinical study of Zometa from the San Antonio Symposium, then I will post it on whatever forum I believe is necessary.  Since I was Stage 1, should I have waited for a Stage 3 sister to post it instead on this forum?  It never occurred to me to NOT share the study with my Stage 3 sisters and what my physician and his colleagues were saying and how it was going to impact me and other Stage 1,2 and 3 women.

I appreciate all the enlightenment I've received from the women on this Board.  Every nuggot of information and the candor that I've received has helped me make informed decisions and has enriched my life.  As I continue to find information that I think is valuable to others, I will share it in an unfettered way.  I think the Internet has provided us with an invaluable gift to share our information, as well as, our emotion.  With that in mind, I sincerely hope, we can all move in the direction of broadening our boundaries. 

AgentMo - I appreciate your candor and I hope you will appreciate mine.  I do hope you continue to find the solace and information you need here at Breastcancer.org. It's really a great place.  I hope you will continue to share your pearls.

Ferretmom, did someone ask you to leave in a PM? If not, your post was not offensive, please, don't assume it was! And if someone PM'd you and told you to leave, even better reason for staying part of a public forum!

Merry Christmas ladies whatever stage you are.

ok, well i will not keep my mouth shut on this one!!! stage 1 stage 2 stage 3, we all have had cancer!!! i have stage 2 and went through 16 hard chemo treatments! the one thing that should be remembered is just cause your stage 2 we can carry the gene, we could be a 3 as far as aggression goes, there are some of us that have a 70%or more chance of recurrence with stage 2, we need to feel secure about that, i got support from women who did not even need chemo on this board and in the beginning i thought, your no where near i am! but i have learned i needed support from all, cancer is cancer, stage 3 does not mean we will lose our life any sooner then a stage 1 or 2 woman. i have lost friends with stage 1...cancer does what it wants.. im scared to death everyday that blood a cell escaped. i had well  over an inch tumor and my risk factors high, i feel for every woman out there with cancer, i pray every day for a cure.

I am new and I am scared and I go to what catches my eye and interest. Before joining this unfortunate club, I had already encountered the elitism and separation so prevelant with those of us who have children with special needs. Mine has autism so that shuts down some downs syndrome avenues, etc. We are all bound by a common thread. Who else can understand? I agree with the posters who have offered up this is all about respect, fear, knowledge and hope. I learn from all of you- humility, grace, courses of treatment, what I might face, etc. If, along the way, I can do the same, I will. There is no bragging. Does it follow I should jealous or think of one of those young girls who light up the BRAC test and find themselves choosing a mastectomy were so lucky they didn't get cancer?. Think about that. Or instead be encouraged by the new tests (confusing though they may be-all of this is so frigging  confusing)   If someone came along and was rude, I imagine their post would be deleted. I feel I was led here. Sometimes I just listen. When I signed the form for all my breast tissue to go to research it was in the honest hope that one day nobody would have to hear they have cancer...I told them take it all and make it all go away for all of us...please. I understand resentment and negativety, hell I feel it all the time. But then I know inside nobody makes it through this life unscathed. Some of us just have more visible scars. I love you all.

Merry Christmas and may all your hopes and dreams come true.

Ladies, I have sat here and read all posts on this thread with a heavy heart.  I do understand what Agentmo was getting at but I also understand what the other ladies have said.  I was Dx'd originally stage IIb no nodes involved and was pretty much assured that I would be a-okay as far as recurrance was concerned but here I now sit, stage IV and my doc is still shaking his head and saying I have defied statistics.  This is the truth of BC.  Anyone at anytime can be in the same boat as I am, so, node involvement or no node involvement is a mute point we are all fighting for our lives.  IMHO stage definately does not matter!

Personally, IMO, I think it's good to get to know and share with the women in other stages and their forums.  As a stage III, sometimes if I see something on the active topics about a sista going thru something rough, or painful or something I can relate to, I will want to add some helpfu comments.. Or just stop into the stage IV girls to let them know I care about some of the situations they are facing.  I also will check out the Natural Girls , or homonal therapy threads, all of which have women in various stages. But were i feel most comfortable is on the stage III forum with the girls who have gone thru this stage, and the fears that accompany it.  I sure do love all my stage 3er sistas   even when we agree to disagree.  Gotta Love Ya's

Barb  

AgentMo: I can understand how you feel, and not just about the BCO boards. All of the support and information for BC out there is directed at the early stagers - none for those us who (through no fault of our own) slipped thru the cracks and ended up being dx at III or IV (I was IV for a while) losing not just our breasts but our armpits, with the neverending worry about LE, and mets.

Also, when I first came to these boards I wondered WTH were people doing playing games here when some of us were dying; and WTH was the meaning of all those strange forums - singles, lesbians, African Americans, Canadians, Muslims, etc.

Ah, how time mellows us all!!!

Cancer is cancer, our stages are fluid. Playing BCO games is a wonderful distraction from the hell we're ALL in; and the more forums the merrier!!!