January Mastectomy

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  • MaiTai
    MaiTai Member Posts: 491
    edited December 2010

    Hi All,

    Marianne - love what and how you wrote to Cat123. I could not agree more or say it better.

    Both you and Sally, talking about the nipple reconstruction, are encouraging me to do it.

    I had a bilat. Mx. and immediate reconstruction with alloderm and implants. The surgery turned out very nice and luckily I didn't need follow up surgery. The surgery was a year ago and I can't find the courage to have the nip reconstruction. I didn't think I felt bad about not having them but hearing (readingWink) you talk about it makes me a little jealous not to have them. 

    I also have an 8 year old daughter, who doesn't seem concerned about my nippless foobies. She calls them the smiley boobs, because the scars remind her of smiling faces...

    I cannot help to think it will be better for her to see me "whole" again.

    I'm mostly scared of infection. My PS said it wasn't very common but it happened. I'm scared an infection could ruin the whole surgery. I'm not sure it is very rational, but that is how I feel.

    Debbie - The picture is incredible. I would like to be there. I travel quite a lot (I'm a fashion buyer for a chain of stores), but mine are mostly urban visits.

    Robin - Hope your son gets his act together soon. Sorry you are feeling heartbroken.

    Hope we all have a great week!

    Clari 

  • neversurrender
    neversurrender Member Posts: 508
    edited December 2010

    Clari, I understand your feelings about the nipples.  I really wanted them when all of this started, but a couple of months after my initial surgery, I changed my mind.  After Kat had hers added, though, I changed my mind again.  Her pictures (thanks for sharing Kat !) made the decision for me.  When I went in last week to have it done, I was very excited, but also felt a little sad.  I had adjusted to the new nippless breasts and was content with them.  Part of me was sad to see them go and part was scared it would somehow mess up my recon.  I still wasn't convinced after the nipples were added.  They are still swolen and bandaged, so not much to look at.  BUT, when I caught that glimpse of them in shadow, breathless....I knew it was the right decision, and now I am thrilled (still swolen and bandaged).  Each of us are different though, so what is right for one will not be for all.  If you are scared about the infection aspect, talk with your PS.  I'm sure he/she can give you some guidance on the risk involved.  I don't have implants, so I can't speak to what kind of risk infections can carry.

    My youngest daughter is 8 yrs also.   She seems to have adjusted well and doesn't have a lot of questions regarding my recon.  I think that she (and her 2 older sisters) expected something a lot different (maybe scarier) when they heard of the bmx.  I had an immediate diep recon, and with it, I looked like all I had had was a bi-lateral nipple removal.   I do think these nipples will make me look 'whole' to them again.   Maybe give them a little more peace of mind that the BC is behind us.

    Hugs Team January !

  • neversurrender
    neversurrender Member Posts: 508
    edited December 2010

    Hey Team January......we haven't heard from some of you for a LONG time.  If you are out there lurking, please pop on and let us know how you are.  We miss you !

    Donna, I can't believe your Jets beat my Steelers yesterday :(     It's the first time the Jets have ever won at Heinz Field.  Oh well, they'll probably meet up again in the playoffs...and Pittsburgh will win that one !

  • bcincolorado
    bcincolorado Member Posts: 5,758
    edited December 2010

    Hi Team January:

    I have to share this link I just found with a pink glove dance sequal.  The song made me cry.  We definitely did not get through this year on our own.  We had lots of support, including from each other.  May you all have a healthy and wonderful 2011!

     http://pinkglovedance.com/

     Paula

  • neversurrender
    neversurrender Member Posts: 508
    edited December 2010

    Here is a picture of my girls.  This was the picture for our Christmas card this year.

    Photobucket" Sally dx Nov 12@40yrs DCIS,grade 3.stage 0. 0/7nodes. bmx 1-25-10 with diep recon.

  • neversurrender
    neversurrender Member Posts: 508
    edited December 2010
    These are my girls.  We sent this picture with our Christmas cards this year.Photobucket" mce_src="
  • MaiTai
    MaiTai Member Posts: 491
    edited December 2010

    Sally,

    They are beautiful. This is what we have to be thankful for.

    Enjoy your gorgeous family.

    Clari

  • robinlbe
    robinlbe Member Posts: 585
    edited December 2010

    Sally, your girls are so cute...and their shirts are so appropriate for *your* year :)

    blessings...robin

  • pbebow
    pbebow Member Posts: 575
    edited December 2010

    Hi Ladies!

    Just a quick hi!  sorry, meant to have more time but it took me forever to get caught up!  I guess it's been a while since I've checked in.  Been very busy doing Christmas!  I kind of didn't get into as much last year because of the obvious so I am all about it this year!  Shopping, wrapping and baking done!  Now I enjoy!  I had surgery a week and half ago, I know that Kat filled you in a litte, thanks!  I meant to come on myself but never got around to it.  My PS is wonderful!  We went in for another fat grafting procedure still trying to perfect the step-off.  When he came in to mark me up before surgery I asked if he was going to take it all this time (the fat off my belly) and he kind of laughed and asked what we'd do if I needed another procedure and I told him that I had plenty in my butt and thighs.  Well after surgery he came out and told my DH that if we needed another round he'd have to go around the corner and I'd likely need to have some excess skin removed.  Whooo hooo!  He took all of the fat off my stomach, it's all gone!  Of course I've been very bruised and swollen from the procedure and I still have my whole stomach covered in tape so it's hard to tell, but I am so excited!  I am in my compression garment for a month again, but this time I am not allowed to wear jeans or anything binding at all (even panties!) for the whole month.  So I am in sweats or leggings and granny panties!  LOL!  My DH thinks I am sooooo sexy!  I said I can put up with it for a month if I look good on the beach in Cancun next month!  It has been years since I've worn leggings, but I went out and bought some long cute sweaters and sweater dresses and boots and I think it looks pretty good.  Very comfy for sure!

    So that's what's happening with me, sorry I've been neglecting you all!  Hugs to all who are going through procedures and biopsies and waiting and wondering!  And Kat, we need to go and kick that tattoo ladies a$$!!!!  What a witch with a B!  And the nurse that wouldn't give a bigger gown, WTS!  I have been so blessed to always have nice nurses and people, I hope it continues.  Anyway, I wish everyone a very merry Christmas and a blessed, dr-free New Year!  I'll be thinking of you all!

    Hugs Chickas!

    Paula

  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited December 2010

    Marianne I certainly hear you on the emotional scars.  Glad that the counselling is working for you and your husband. Are you pleased with your tatoos?

    Sally your story about seeing your shadow was so heartwarming.  It seems very slowly, as each of us takes these baby steps towards trying to get some sort of normalcy back in our lives. I am so happy for you.  Your daughters are beautiful.

    Lyn, that is great news about your results coming back B9, but sorry you are having to deal with the infection.

    Wow, Debbie what a spectacular picture. Through you we get to travel the world. Keep the pictures coming. I so vividly remember last winter when you posted that picture of "Team January" you had written in the sand when you went to Florida.

    Robin I don't know why these biopsies take so long here?  But it is just like when I was going through all the biopsies for the breast, always these 2 week waits. Very frustrating. And yes it HURT!!!!!! I am so sorry that you are heartbroken about your son.  We only want the best for our children, and sometimes so hard to let them figure it out the hard way. I am so with you on hoping and praying for a better 2011 for all of us.

    I am trying to stay positive here, and have made contact with the surgeon's office to have a follow up appointment and discuss that next steps of nipple construction. For those of you who have had it done already, you have made it sound so doable and it is good to hear how pleased everyone seems to be for having it done.

    Take Care

    Cathy

  • ReginaR
    ReginaR Member Posts: 287
    edited August 2013

    Hello Jan Friends. I have been keeping up with post & Thinking of all of you! Big {{hugs}} for all of you!!  So Sorrry I haven't really had time to write & I should be cleaning now , because family comming over tomorrow evening & I work christmas eve, so I got to get it done today.

     But I wanted to Let you Know that Robin & I met a wonderful Breast Cancer friend  Angela at  June retreat, & then here we are together in  Oct at Koman walk, We got the new yesterday ,that she pass away,( she was stage 4 & met to bones) we have  been praying last month for Micarcle. Robin & I are so sad,But I know she is now at peace , but she leave behind a Husband & 4 children, Please Pray for them ! Thanks

    ! komen walk 2010 Robin and Gina find *Angela*.....June Retreat buddy!!

    I am Praying that we all have a Blessed Christmas & I know we all are looking fwd to a new & healthy year! Bring on 2011 for all us Jan gals!

     We all need to toast together  durning Jan on each our Annivsary!

    Thinking of all of you & Merry Chrismas Jan Friends! Much love {{{{hugs}} Gina

  • faithandfifty
    faithandfifty Member Posts: 10,007
    edited August 2013

    Team January. This is a portion of a FB message I sent to our team members, Gina & Robin, as I saw their mutual announcements of their shared loss. It dawned on me that perhaps my ramble might be of some help to others at such a juncture. Here's my note to them:

    We are now driving thru South Carolina en route to Augusta GA for the four generation holiday festivities. Sunday we will then drive on down the rest of the way to our new little home in Ocala, FL.

    The 'survivor guilt' questions are especially haunting and perhaps pointless, but surface at times like this (in my opinion.)

    As you may vaguely remember I "lost" my BCO companion 'Saint' earlier this year. We were especially close & she entrusted to me her last months, weeks and days & we spoke numerous times by phone, each day -- until her final days. We met and our families had an entire week together the summer before her passing.

    I attempted not to say a whole lot about it on the Team January thread at the time, in that you were all so very 'new' to the concept of BC & I didn't want to point out the truth: that some of our sisters will have their lives prematurely end -- due to their diagnosis, status, care or lack of care, the failing of the various treatments to impact their progression and the like.

    The more 'active' you get in the BC world, the more likely it is that you can suffer the loss of a sister. Losing your angel puts everything into a whole new perspective.

    There aren't any words that can help with your pain, but I just wanted you to know that I stand here to offer you empathy and caring...... especially in that each of you are still in the tilt-o-whirl of continuing medical issues & appointments & unknowns.

    Love to each of you & your families during this time of joy, which somehow also translates into a time of stress. When we get to the bottom of that conundrum we can offer our insight to the world at large.

    *********

    Now to Team January as a whole:

    I know that the holidays bring a whole new dimension to survivorship and a new facet to our interpretation(s) of our journeys. Again. Each new milestone in our lives brings yet a new and a different prism to our perspective. Embrace whatever you're feeling or not feeling as quite normal. Give yourself kindness as a central gift from now till your surgery date's anniversary.

    Hold fast to your family and loved ones and relish the delights at hand.

    This ornament hung on our tree each year & is now safely packed in a box somewhere, as we won't be 'decorating' this year..... the most amazing part in 'finding' her last year, was that I had completely 'forgotten' who gave her to me.

    Sort of like pregnancy. If you're lucky, the specific details blur together over the years & become less distinct in your mind -- as other things take significance in your life.

    Ever onward team. Ever onward.

    Speical hugs to each of our team members, for whom the holidays bring a special taste of grief and missing loved ones and friends to the fore-ground.

    We bring celebration to a new and different dimension..... yet we must celebrate to honor the love that we have shared.

    xx00xx00xx00xx

    Strength and courage.

    Strength and courage.

    Strength and courage

     

  • faithandfifty
    faithandfifty Member Posts: 10,007
    edited August 2013
  • faithandfifty
    faithandfifty Member Posts: 10,007
    edited December 2010
  • ReginaR
    ReginaR Member Posts: 287
    edited December 2010

    KissWishing all My Jan Sisters a Very Blessed Christmas!
     Hope you all are enjoy a special day with your Family! We Have a white Christmas in Indiana!

      Thinking of all of you today!!! Wishing you the Merriest Christmas this year!!! Wow what a difference a year make! Looking Fwd for all of us to have A Peaceful 2011!!

    Christmas {{{{hugs}}} to all!  Love ya, Gina

  • MaiTai
    MaiTai Member Posts: 491
    edited December 2010

    Hi Team,

     A little late but- Merry Christmas!

    I wish you all happiness, joy with your families and health above all.

    Clari

  • bookart
    bookart Member Posts: 564
    edited December 2010

    Anyone else soggy with post-Christmas exhaustion?  I go back to work tomorrow, but only work T/Th this week, then four more days off - you would think I've had enough rest to not be tired!

  • neversurrender
    neversurrender Member Posts: 508
    edited December 2010

    Hello Team January !  I hope everyone had a wonderful Christmas !

    Cathy and Paula, I hope you both enjoyed your birthdays.

    Have a safe and happy new year's eve everyone.

    Elaine,  I feel sorry you have to go back to work...ugh...I am off until Monday.

    Never Surrender !

  • bcincolorado
    bcincolorado Member Posts: 5,758
    edited December 2010

    Sally, thanks for the birthday wishes.  I had a nice day.  After this year, turning 50 wasn't so bad!  I'm jealous you are off until Monday!  I get next Monday off as my New Year holiday but work all week this week.  Now that I'm 50 I'm ready to be 65 and retire!

  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited December 2010

    Merry belated Christmas to everyone!  Hope everyone had wonderful holiday time with their families.  This Christmas was sure alot different than last year for me.  At this time last year I was waiting for my surgery date and having a very frustrating and difficult time trying to get that information from my surgeons secretary.....not fun.

    Thanks for the birthday wishes Sally. It was 48 for me this year, I have a couple of more years for the big one.  Happy birthday Paula, you were the 24th?

    Thanks for the picture Faith of the writing in the sand.   That brought a flood of emotion for me.  A really nice warm fuzzy feeling.  The same way it did when you posted it last year.

    Hope everyone has a very Happy New Year.  January will probably be a tough month, but then after that I am so looking forward to a new year.  Still waiting for my biopsy results...........

    Take Care

    Cathy

  • burley
    burley Member Posts: 631
    edited December 2010

    Hello ladies-checking in.  Time flies for me in the month of December with my daughter's and husband's birthdays, then Christmas of course.

    I hope everyone had a terrific Christmas!  Ours was very nice.  Just the right amount of time spent with family and friends-not too much, and not too little.

    Had a follow up appointment with the PS last week from my Nov. 16th surgery-all is well.  Nothing exciting.  I will see her in another 3 weeks from now to discuss nipples-yea!  I'm really looking forward to them.  I need some frosting on my cakes. 

    Where is my hair?  Holy cow, this is taking forever!  It's still only about 1/2 inch long.  Considering my last chemo was on July 15th, I thought it would be a lot farther along by now.  So I'm stuck wearing my wig-at least to work.  The rest of the time I wear a baseball cap.

    I wish we could all toast eachother this New Year's-I know wherever we are, we'll each be thankful for our good health, and the friendships we've found.  I'll be thinking of you ladies!  Here's to a terrific 2011!

  • ReginaR
    ReginaR Member Posts: 287
    edited December 2010

    Wishing all My all my Jan Gals a Healthy & Happy 2011!

     Thinking of all of you & prayers for a Healthy Year for all of us!

    I know this Month comming up will be especially emotion for all of us! But we have each other!!

    Love ya my Jan Friends!!!!

    {{{hugs}} Gina

  • TNgolfer
    TNgolfer Member Posts: 253
    edited December 2010

    Mornin' Team,

    I know this evening and tomorrow will especially be a reflection back and hope for the future for this team.  It's ok to take a brief look back if only to realize the war we have survived, but I am really looking forward to starting this year without cancer.  This month will be filled with our Mx anniversaries and a lot of other reminders of what we have all been through.  But I believe that this new year must be a time for all of us to look forward and move on....with nipples or without!  (your decision, Cathy!)  We all have learned lessons this year.  May each of us have a healthy and happy new year.

    Robin, I pray that your son will find his way.  Another lesson for us to learn about what we can control and what we can't.  My youngest son is still trying to find his way....the school of hard knocks has taught him a lot more than he would ever learn....though it has pained me to see what he has experienced.  We cannot live our childrens' lives...they must make their own mistakes.  Just pray they learn from them and are better off for them.  None of us ever really learned anything from the good times.  Try not to stress over his decisions (I know that is easier said than done). 

    Prayers for all of us.

    Love

    Marianne

  • faithandfifty
    faithandfifty Member Posts: 10,007
    edited December 2010

    Yes. This is a time of reflection and rejoicing -- all rolled into one big stewing pot.

    It's so great to hear our team members checking in, sharing updates & wisdom.

    We have a party to attend to night in our new FL neighborhood, complete with dancing and all the fun of a crowd of new-to-become-friends.

    My husband's brother just called and is surprising us by stopping thru on his way north.

    We had such a splendid time with the whole family together over Christmas, in GA..... our first four generation Christmas together.

    I just got word from the Marketing Department of Redleaf Publishing that they needed my professional photo & bio for their upcoming efforts as they release our collaboration project, where a national expert on dance has written the text to be accompanied by a two CD set of my music: 13 songs and dozens & dozens of my instrumentals. This is the dream of my professional life, coming to fruition -- right at this very cusp.

    This has been the year of complications, set-backs, and head-banging frustrations, seeking a team of empathetic professionals when all went to hell in a hand-basket with unforseen frustrations and developments.

    It has also been the year when I released my newest picture book.

    Ups and downs and ups and downs.

    Losing my dear friend Saint, to this dastardly disease will forever change me -- in ways I have yet to encounter. Befriending her mourning husband and children will be an ongoing effort.

    It's been quite a year, hasn't it team?

    So many here have encountered so much more than I can fathom, surviving chemos and rads and other surgeries, complications, relationships strained and bodies that have winced.........

    but ya know what??

    We more or less made it, didn't we?

    Sure we're scarred and flat or asymetrical, with and without hair.............

    but ya know what??

    We came thru.

    We are here.

    Together.

    God willing into this next chapter.

    The anniversaries are just around the corner.

    And so are the opportunities.

    Time to pick ourselves up, dust ourselves off, lift a glass and toast:

    "Here's to Team January. Me made it."

    I believe in you. Thanks for believeing in me.

    xx00xx00xx00xx

    Strength and courage.

    Strength and courage.

    Strength and courage.

  • KatRNagain92
    KatRNagain92 Member Posts: 522
    edited December 2010

    Happy New Year Team!


    I just made a donation to Breastcancer.org in our name :)  I am so thankful for all of you and this forum.  I am also sending out good wishes to the new class of January 2011...I hope all of those ladies find the support, friendship and understanding that we did and that they will be able to form lasting relationships to help them get through to the other side.

    God bless us all~

    Kat

  • ariesrottie
    ariesrottie Member Posts: 260
    edited December 2010

    To All My January Sister:

    May 2011 be a better HEALTHY year for all of us.. May all that are still going through treatment and surgery,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, know that you are in my thoughts and prayers everyday.

    If it wasn't for you girls I would of had a horrible recovery. You girls helped me through this year. I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart.

    May 2011 be Happy and Healthy.

    Love-Donna 

  • ariesrottie
    ariesrottie Member Posts: 260
    edited December 2010

    Kat- you brought me to tears. Tears of Joy and heart ship. What a wonderful site this is. I hope and pray that the girls facing this horrible disease find the comfort that we all found in this site and among us.

    We were truly blessed.

    Happy and Healthy 2011 my January Sister.

    HUGS<3

    Donna 

  • neversurrender
    neversurrender Member Posts: 508
    edited December 2010

    Team January, I wish us all a happy and Healthy 2011 ! 

    I am so blesses to have found all of you.  When I look back over 2010,Team January will be one of the things I am most thankful for.  I can't imagine making this journey without you.  Thank you for the love, the support, and the shoulders to cry on.  

    I will raise my glass at midnight and make my toast Debbie.  "Here's to Team January. We made it."

    Love ya Team January !!!!

  • MaiTai
    MaiTai Member Posts: 491
    edited January 2011

    Hi Team,

    Today is the anniversary of my DMX.

    What a year!

    It went through a lot faster and better than I expected.

    I wish you all the best year possible. I believe we deserve it.

    The most important thing I can wish for is good health. I believe everything else can be achieved.

    Clari 

  • ariesrottie
    ariesrottie Member Posts: 260
    edited January 2011

    A happy and Healthy year to you, MaiTai.... We did it... Lets move ahead...

    Courage and Strength-

    Donna 

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