Starting Chemo Feb 2010?

Mo:  I'm glad you've found someone with whom you can connect.  I've thought of finding a therapist.  We all have baggage, and the cancer aspect can make the load harder to carry.

I haven't been on for a while but having had a rough few weeks I know this is the place to come. I read with interest about the arm problems. I have the same symptoms but not on the surgery side so I am worried. I cannot move my arm backwards or use it for very much at all and cannot sleep on it at all. The pain is in my shoulder and down the arm. I had an x ray which came back normal. the doc said I can have physio as it may be a torn rotator cuff due to exercise or a frozen shoulder but of course I fear the worst as I read about someone who ignored shoulder pain and it was secondaries on her lung.. I am on Tamoxifen and Herceptin and all major joints ache. I feel like an old woman and cannot shift the excess weight I have put on. My hot flashes are keeping me awake at night along with the joint pain.I feel like I have flu after each Herceptin and my right arm, the one which aches, is the one they use for the treatment and the veins are giving up. I feel awful reading all of this back and of course I am so grateful to be here one year after diagnosis but I am also finding that now time has passed many just assume all is well and don't really want to hear my moans.I just know that someone on here will recognise these feelings.

I'm so sorry for those of you who are having arm problems.  That must be awful, after all we've been through.  I hope the issues resolve for everyone really soon. 

With Christmas time here, we obviously think about gifts and I really think that the best gift I had in my life was the compassion, friendship and support that I got from each and every one of you ladies during our struggles together.  I can't thank you all enough for always being there and helping to get me through the rough patches.  I always knew I could count on you all and I'm forever grateful.  To each of you I wish continued healing, love, peace, laughter and joy for the upcoming holidays and always!  Mo 

Hi ladies, glad to catch up with so many of you! My long eyelashes are falling out again but this time, there are short, stubby ones in their place. Back to using the heavy duty eyeliner, again I feel like my eyebrows are thinner, too. I, too, have aches that I never had before, my knees, my elbows (?). I know not all new aches and pains are cancer related but it sure has become the first thing I think of. I have had some pain under my arm near my axillary dissection incision and drain area. I think it might be the return of sensation. I do not have LE but was fitted for a sleeve for flying. I wore it in November and will wear it next month when we going to MT skiing. I appreciate all the good advice and heartfelt sharing on this thread. Thank you all for the support and encouragement over the year! Gina

Hi February ladies, I was diagnosed after New Years so with it coming up,  I began to wonder how us February ladies are doing.  Sounds like everyone is doing fairly well -  I too have some arm issues, nothing too bad, but still after almost 6 months - return of sensation and random pains, and still some swelling. *sigh* 

Hope everyone is doing well this Christmas and thankful for our band of sisters. Bring on 2011!!!! 

Hi all,

I disappeared for a couple of weeks but have been thinking of you all often. This is the week of reflection on the last year as we prepare for a new one, and I'm sure you all join me in saying good riddance to 2010, and here's to a healthy 2011!

But mostly I wanted to thank you all. I don't know how I would have gotten through the last year without you all. From the moment I discovered the site (within a day of diagnosis), it has informed me, calmed me down, occasionally scared me, but mostly has been a great aid to soldiering through this battle.

Retrievermom, yeah, I was a little concerned about the site's founder's talk about hormones in food and its connection to cancer. I go to some trouble and expense to buy hormone-free milk, meat, etc., and to buy organic produce, and I have no doubt that environmental and dietary factors are involved in cancers. But it's so, so complicated. I will never know where mine came from (it does not appear to be genetic), but food/environment is only part of the puzzle.

I wish you all a very happy and healthy new year.

Colleen 

Hello ladies!  Checking in...I hope everyone had a terrific Christmas!

Not much new here-hair is only about 1/2 inch all around, and my last treatment was in July.  Humpf.  But my eyebrows and eyelashes look great!  So I still wear the wig to work, and a baseball cap everywhere else.

I have lots of aches and pains, but I'm not sure how much of it is from chemo, or just the Tamoxifen.  My knees creak and groan like an old lady, my ankles ache, my hips ache, and my back frequently hurts.  Oh my.  All this and I just turned 40!  Wow.

I hope everyone has a safe New Year's.  Here's to a terrific 2011!

Hi everyone, my bad shoulder problem turned out to be a frozen shoulder. I had it in the other shoulder some years ago and the Oncologist and physio both agree that the chemo probably brought this one on just as it has with all the other joint pain. I was very relieved and glad that I brought the appointment forward to before Xmas so I could relax. The other joint problems continue particularly my hip knees and elbow but as long as it isn't cancer I don't mind. I have also been been prescribed pills for the hot flashes which are brilliant and started working straight away they are called Venlafaxine and I take one a day with food. I am trying to lose weight but it seems impossible. I am also still very tired especially after Herceptin but at least I am still here. Hope everyone else is well.

Happy New Year  everyone!!!  Here is hoping that 2011 is a hell of a lot better than 2010 for us!

While I dont seem to have the arm pain that some of you are experiencing, I have unfortunately developed the dreaded LE. SUCKS. I have to wear a compression garment for the rest of my life. Right now I have PT for an hour a day, and the LE is definitely less but its a chronic condition and can only be "managed" not "cured".  and its my right arm and hand--and I'm right handed. Right now I am wearing bulky bandages (mult ace wraps) until my glove and sleeve come in--I have to wear both since I have edema in my fingers. SUCKS. I am typing this pretty much one-handed. 

Also, had my "yearly" mammo last week.....and an ultrasound. And they saw something...are you kidding me? After all the chemo and rads and Tamoxifen???  So today I go for a bilat breast MRI and a possible biopsy...they think its a lymph node near my surgery site.  So it looks like I am starting 2011 just like I did in 2010. Arrgghhh.....and my joints ache, esp my legs. Its like the joint pain I had on Taxol although not nearly as severe. I feel so old.....

But my hair looks good (see new pic).  And I found a website that sells "designer" lymphedema sleeves...they're called "Lymphadivas" so I am thinking about getting one of two of them with neat designs, like leopard print (haha) or black lace or something along those lines. If I gotta wear one forever, I might as well look good. (SUCKS). 

Anyway, I too am very thankful for this site....I dont share with anyone else what I am feeling or going thru--esp now, a year since my original diagnosis. Nobody wants to really hear, they all think I'm cured. Only you girls know how I feel. Sorry to be such a whiner but I'm sure you all can understand.

Wish me luck with my MRI and here's to a happy and healthy and cancer-free 2011 for all of us!  Luv you all!

Hi lindee -  You look great!!  I love your hair.  Mine is about the same length but my stylist hasn't shaped it very well.  Sorry to hear about the LE but the diva prints sound fun! 

Here's to 2011!!!

Wow Lindee!  What a way to start the year.  I hope everything goes well, and you're able to get some answers quickly.  Your hair looks awesome!  I'm way jealous (mine is literally only 1/2 inch long on top.)

So yesterday I found out that my BRCA1 is mutated-or as most people would put it, I have the breast cancer gene.  Ugh.  I kind of figured I did, but didn't know all the statistics on how it can affect my kids if they have it.  Double ugh.  And then, of course, is my 40% chance of getting ovarian cancer.  So he referred me to an oncologist gynecologist (didn't know there was such a thing) to have my ovaries removed.  Why not, right?  Not like I'm using them anyway.  I've been in "chemopause" since February, so I'm really not expecting anything new.  My hot flashes couldn't get much worse.

So when my daughter is 18, I'll have her tested.  If she has it, she has a 70-80% chance of getting breast cancer.  And the same 40% chance of ovarian cancer.  I will probably advise her to have kids first, then definitely consider having a mastectomy and her ovaries out.  And I'll have to have my son tested so he'll know whether he will pass it on to his kids.

I was also surprised that my brother has a 50% chance of having it, so I need to call him and give him the crappy news.  He probably needs to be tested so he will know whether or not to have his daughter tested.  Then my nephews could have it and pass it on to their kids.  And so on, and so forth...OMG, madness!

Other than that, the new year has started off just fine.  Lol

Morning, everyone - well, got a surprise today.  My period appears to be coming back - very strange.  I thought for sure I was done with all this fun.  It's been gone since March and I truly didn't miss it after the major bleeding/hospital/scare of my life incident back then.  Just curious if anyone else's has suddenly come back and, if so, is it the same or different than it used to be? 

Lindee, still thinking of you and hoping everything is okay.  Mo 

Hello everyone. I've been a lurker for a while & haven't written! Writing is not my talent.

It seems we are all still going through too much junk. I guess I had thought it would be over after radiation but NOOOO! I feel so tired & my body aches, especially my back. I cant sleep because of those @#&*% hot flashes & I am as big as a freaking house! My hair is growing in but of course that's not not the same either, its now curly & very dark. I have always had blonde hair and never had to do anything to it, well now I colored it & it turned orange! I had it done 3 times to get a sorta color that didn't look like Bozo the clown! I fell on our cruise & busted my knee so I've been in PT for that too. I was taking Effexor for the HF but it stopped working and I was sleeping & exhausted all the time & I think it was partly that. Radiation really knocked me though & I'm just now getting some energy back. Started on Neurontin for the HF and am starting tamox even though my ER was only 20% weakly positive. I feel like those guys on HeeHaw that used to sit around singing that song "gloom despair & agony..." Sorry for the rant but I'm just sick of all this crap! And this is the one place I can let it all out & ya'll will get it & I wont feel so guilty thinking how fortunate I am because others are worse off & I shouldn't complain. A million thanks ladies for being there and for opening up to me and all others here on this site. I don't even want to think about how it would have been without ya'll. It still sucks though! Haha!

All I'm having done for follow up is a mammo in May. I've got to say this is bothering me. I want a full scan of some sort to look for any little thing. They have never done one on me! I guess that's the big elephant in my world right now is Is is coming back, and if it does how will I know if they are only following up with mammos. What if is comes back elsewhere? Will it be too late if I rely on symptoms to tell? Plus I have all these aches & pains! UGH! What do ya'll think? Feel?

Lindee: You do look great! So sorry about the LE. I hope you can get it under control where you only have to wear the sleeve at times. My Drs have told me it can get better if caught early and treated with massage & wraps etc. I hope that works for you. I was fitted for a sleeve & gauntlet which I wear when flying or long car trips. It seems that the figures on this are low as I sure did see quite a few ladies with it during radiation. Get the sleeve that looks like tattoos for fun! Sorry it sucks

Michele: Hope you are doing OK & that the new meds are working. Thinking of you.

Mo: Have your HF gone away or reduced at all since your period?

Burley: I'm not sure if I'm jealous if the car or the D boobs! I had D's before & now I have barely a C but they are perky! Under wire bras kind of bother me now though & I haven't found any I like that don't have a wire.

I guess I'll go for now, Happy New Year everyone! I cant wait to truly get this all behind us!

Laura

Hi girls!   Thanks for all the well wishes and prayers--they must've worked b/c after the MRI ALSO showed something suspicious, I had to undergo an ultrasound guided needle biopsy of a mammary lymph node. Needless to say I was freaking out. But luckily the path report came back BENIGN!  I'm happy with the outcome, but it sucks to have to worry about everything.

While I was at the breast center waiting for my biopsy, I ran into one of the nurses who actually remembered me from a year ago when I was first diagnosed. I told her about the biopsy and the lymphedema, showed her my newly acquired sleeve and glove, and bemoaned the fact that I would have to wear them forever. She told me that that wasn't necessarily true, that a lot of women get LE, but they can manage it and sometimes only need garments for flare-ups. Wow, that made me feel better. I had my sleeve for a day or 2 but wearing it made my hand swell up so I will be getting one with less compression. I haven't been wearing one as I am waiting for the new one, but the swelling in my arm is almost unnoticeable...so maybe she was right. I can only hope so. I rejoined my gym a few weeks ago but haven't been back yet. I want to wait till my compression sleeve is all corrected, but I too have put on weight--and its all in my abdomen ugh!  I hope if I can get back to the gym on a regular basis, I can cut down the weight a little.Although I have to tell you all that last week I was watching the Biggest Loser (the night before my biopsy and I was so sure it was going to come back positive) that I was thinking to myself--these people weigh like 500 lbs and they are f ing healthier than me.  It sure is a relief to have that biopsy done and benign. 

lbreedl--after my rads were finished, I met with my onc and told him that I  wanted scans done.....so he ordered a bone scan, and CT scans of my chest, brain, abdomen, and pelvis. He didn't think I needed them, but it certainly helped me feel better to get them done and have negative results. Because lets face it, in our position, any little symptom is going to freak us out.