Chemo starting in December 2010

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  • ninap7
    ninap7 Member Posts: 50
    edited December 2010

    I will be praying for your you that your first treatment goes well -

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  • TonLee
    TonLee Member Posts: 2,626
    edited December 2010

    Thanks Hope, I am going to see about the Prilosec.

    I think being scared is normal sometimes, and if you aren't then you're probably not thinking hard enough!! 

    It's scary to know we have the potential to die young, rather than of old age in our beds.  Scary especially when we have children.  Who will take care of them?  Will they remember me?  Will they be left alone and adrift in the world?  Etc.

    This is what I tell myself when these thoughts try to overwhelm me.  (This works for me, maybe it will help you...if not I mean no offense...)

    Millions, literally millions of children in the history of the world have lost parents.  Some have lost parents in a much more horrible fashion than cancer (war, murder, etc).  In the end though, children grow up, by hook or by crook, and become adults.  Lonliness, heartache, sorrow, by their very nature, are not enduring.  They will be ok.  I trust God and the strength of my blood in their veins. 

    I try to see them as adults, with their own families, at peace with life...because in the end peace is something they will have to choose.

    That makes me feel better...and when I really have a bad day I try to talk to a someone younger than me with BC that has children...that keeps things in perspective.

    Dont' know if that will help you....but I think fear is normal until it becomes debilitating...then its time to check it.

    Much love your way.....t

    t

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  • meglove
    meglove Member Posts: 267
    edited December 2010

    I really admire you sisters who can type a lot. I felt very tired just after typing a few words. I had some very dark days with vomiting. today felt a little bit better. Try not to take too many anti-neusea medications. Thought the chemo drugs could be out of our system by 48hours, anybody can provide some informatioin about when the neusea feeling will stop, or there is no end? Thanks. Meg

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  • jmurray5
    jmurray5 Member Posts: 4
    edited December 2010

    Hi all!  Just checking in!  I have gotten such great advice from reading all of your posts and I want to thank you all.  I am going in for my first of 4 TC treatments this afternoon.  I am very nervous but ready to get going.  Both my kids (5 & 6) woke up within hours of eachother with the stomach bug that has been wreaking havoc in their school.  Felt so bad for them and my husband who handled most of the clean-up as I don't want to get this thing.  Good news is that it was before my first treatment and before my levels drop.  Both home sick today.

    I had a friend tell me an interesting quote that I thought I would share...."When you are going through hell, just keep going".  

    I'm going to ask doc about claritin and B12 and stool softener pills today and if I get the go ahead I'm going to start them ASAP.  I get my neulasta shot tomorrow.  Thanks again for all the advice, funny stories, and heartfelt wishes.

    julie

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  • sammolisa
    sammolisa Member Posts: 180
    edited December 2010

    Morning my december sisters!  Day 13 here.  Feel good with occasional headaches that don't last long.

     Hope-- yes I do believe we are twins. In dx as well as treatment and i am just one day ahead of you - we even had the same reaction to the neulasta shot if i'm not mistaken.   I also hate it when people say "oh you will be fine" and "You have to be strong "  SCREW THAT!  The only reason people say that is they don't want to hear the bad stuff.   It's a grieving process every step of the way.   And I am allowing myself to grieve if I want to, and be scared, and cry when I want and laugh when I can, and pray for strength to get through.  God is there for me.  He knows what I need to go through to get to the other side.  Nothing about this cancer surprised HIM.  He knew is was coming and prepared me by giving me the gift of my DH.

    I hear ya about wanting to post to everyone individually - just can't sometimes,  and in the beginning of the chemo it's all i could do to type a sentence or two before i had to lay back down.   And a weekly meeting would be so awesome!!  Ya know,  we could all join a yahoo chat or something like that.   May not be face to face but easier to talk and chat back and forth.  That may be fun.

    Christmas is coming so fast!  I don't have the energy to do cards........ went shopping the past 2 days for the grandkids but that's it for now.  I don't have any kids of my own.   DH has one daughter with a girl 5,  boy 3, and twin girls at 11 months of her own.   They live in a different state so we don't get to see them.  

    Round 2 chemo is coming up.....  this wednesday.  :(  it's also the due date of our baby had he survived.   It will be a bit sad to go on wednesday.  

     I am praying to stay ahead of the SE's this time better than I did last time.  Now that I know what to expect!   I'm just hoping they don't change on me!

    Hugs to all.  

    Good luck to all going into their first one.  

    Lisa

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  • spartina
    spartina Member Posts: 68
    edited December 2010

    Hi all - 

    This morning is grey on Long Island but I am bright inside because it is my first morning/day without nausea since Tuesday.    I had to stop taking  Zofran due to the tremendous headaches it was providing.  The compazine cut into the nausea somewhat but never made it go away.  

    I will be having a port put in on Wednesday although I began 1st treatment on Monday.  After two months on E and C, I will be getting weekly T for 12 weeks.  My plans for this week are wig hunting. I asked a friend to go with me and as I did I burst into tears.  That was funny because until that point I was completely flat emotionally about the hair loss.  

    Take care everyone,

     Maria 

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  • Lawleigh
    Lawleigh Member Posts: 56
    edited December 2010

    Hello December Girls....Well the onco was right day 4 and 5 have knocked me for a loop.  I am so exhausted but am to sore to get comfortable.  My grandson and son finally arrived about 9 last night and that was quite the burst of energy through the door.   I must admit I was not sorry theyarrived so late and it was Devin's bedtime.  I pushed through this morning and am going to have to take a quick nap though. 

    I am also having the stomach pain, quessy not sure what to call it and wonder if the prilosec might be the ticket.  It is just very uncomfortable.

    I hope everyone is hanging in there.  I am sorry I can't address everyone individualy today, but maybe by tonight.  Good for all of you staying on the christmas card and shopping to dos.   I made my card list and wrote my letter but I think my hubby better proof it for clarity...lol

    Best to all

    Leigh

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  • msjag
    msjag Member Posts: 416
    edited December 2010

    Well, ladies...I went to the feel good/look better class, there were only two of us, and each of us brought a friiend.  I felt like I was having an out of body experience, it couldn't be me they were talking about...with no hair, no eyebrows etc...nice people, great make-up kit, but just so surreal.

    The other young woman there was going to have chemo for the 1st time on 12/20 and asked me for tips, you all would have been proud..I told her everything you all have said!! she wrote it all down!! Hey the make up stuff was nice, but she needed to feel in control of this awful disease and was more interested in how to avoid s/e with chemo.  I told her about this site, and hopefully she'll join us.  Hair stil itchy, nothing falling out anywhere yet...day 11...

    Gonna get really cold here in New England this week, today 50, tomorrow 20's.  Is it spring yet??????

    Hope you're all doing well today.

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  • klynnwayman
    klynnwayman Member Posts: 23
    edited December 2010

    Hi there,

    Day 1 an 2 were better than days 3 and 4- I don't know if this is from the chemo, the Neulasta, or both. But today sucked, I do have to day.

    I went back to work today for the first time in over a month (I had my mastectomy 11/5 and have been home since), and could only stay for a few hours. I ended up getting a fever, called the cancer center and had to go in to get labs done. The side effects I have had are fever (just today), intestinal pain (don't know if it is because I am constipated or just intestinal pain), mouth pain (feels like I ate something really hot and the skin is burned throughout my mouth), and nausea. Also, as an extra bonus I started my period yesterday, and it is the heaviest period that I have ever had. When I went in today, they said that days 3 and 4 (and sometimes 5) are the worst, then get better. 

    I am going in on Wednesday to get my head shaved. I haven't had any symptoms yet of hair loss, but have decided to take control of that particular thing. I just don't want to run the risk of my hair coming out in chunks unexpectedly right in front of my 7-year old, as I know it would scare him to death. Honestly, I don't want to see it happen either, so off it goes. 

    My taste for food has changed, but it hasn't been as bad as I have read some of you having to deal with. I was pretty pleased to have minimal SE's Friday and Saturday, but it is catching up with me today (and last night). Today I can only really stand chicken noodle soup (my friend made it homemade for me) and graham crackers. 

    I am so grateful for all of you. Even on the days when I don't get a chance to get on here and type, I feel like I am with you all and know you all.

    I will keep you posted on how day 5 is....hopefully better!

    Much love to you all,

    Kim

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  • sammolisa
    sammolisa Member Posts: 180
    edited December 2010

    Kim -  yep day 3 and 4 were the worst for me too.  1 and 2 = not bad - late on the 2nd day was when the neulasta shot set in and stayed through morning of day 5.  By day 7  I was so much better - even day 6 wasn't bad.   Going on day 14 for me now and I feel good.  Tired still if I do too much tho.    Praying all are well tonite and take care of yourselves in that first week!  Lots of rest, lots of water, animal crackers, compazine and pain pills!   I'm not looking forward to the yuckies again in a couple days........  :(  sigh.

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  • spartina
    spartina Member Posts: 68
    edited December 2010

    Hello all,

     I felt so much like myself yesterday--no nausea and some energy--it was day eight for me. I even did and finished my Christmas cards.  It was uplifting to complete a task!

     This morning took me by surprise with a bad patch of vomiting early in the am.  Nausea pills did nothing to cut into it.   I feel better now but a bit pistol-whipped.  

    I will be getting a port tomorrow.  I choose to start the first treatment before the port.  It will be need more when I get my T in a month and a half.  Will have to do it weekly for 12 weeks.  

    Nausea and queasiness are like an annoying person who takes up all the air in the room.  I was grateful for yesterday's island calm where I was able to recollect myself and my sense of moving forward and purposeful through this challenge.   

    Be well and take care everyone.

    Maria 

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  • klynnwayman
    klynnwayman Member Posts: 23
    edited December 2010

    Hi all,



    I'm typing this from my phone, because I don't even have the strength to get my laptop. I went from attempting work yesterday, to having the worst day post-chemo yet. I'm not trying to scare anybody, but I just need to tell someone.



    I woke up with literally every single part of my body hurting, and not even Lortab 10 is making it better. My muscles, joints, bones and head all hurt. And since I'm taking the strongest pain med they usually give, I have a feeling I'm stuck.



    I was able to maintain my composure around my 7-year old, as it scares him to see mommy in pain. But its taking every ounce of my mental strength not to break down today.



    I will work from home today, and hopefully feel better later. I have parent- teacher conference tonight, so I need to figure out how to make this right.



    I hate to be a whiner. I will say that I am grateful the first couple of days weren't horrible, and I'm looking at the light at the end of the tunnel that I know is there.



    I hope you all are doing well today- please let me hear some of the good stories and the bad. Both are important.



    Kim

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  • sammolisa
    sammolisa Member Posts: 180
    edited December 2010

    Kim - hang in there.  I know where you are.  Vicoden (lortab)  could only take away the edge for me and make me at least a little sane. If you can you sound like you need to rest more - I know it sounds a bit on the hopeful side with a 7 year old and parent teacher conferences tonite but rest is going to be your friend to get through the bad days.  Find someone to sit with your 7 year old unless he is capable of watching himself for a few hours and rest. rest. rest.    When it was bad for me - I just drugged myself up with compazine, lortab and whatever else I had in my chemo bag and went to bed.  Ask the dr if you can take a lortab with an ativan - maybe the extra relaxation from the ativan will make the lortab work better.

    Spartina -  so glad you are feeling better !!  week 2 is so much nicer than week 1!  I still  had occasional bouts of nausea too until day 10 or so.  

    Day 14 here for me and I don't wanna do day 15  bleh. (next round)

    msjag - I keep wanting to get to the feel good look good class too and keep forgetting to sign up.  lol  you are spurring me onward to make sure I call today - glad to hear it was good for you.  And I am with ya there on "can this be me they are talking about?"

    Still no hair loss on my head.   I can tell all the rest of the hair on my body has sllllllllllooooowed down - way down from growth tho.   Half the pubes are gone.    I read somewhere that hair has growth cycles and may not come out all at once - depending on when that particular hair follicles cycle is.  makes sense. 

    Hope, Ton, nina, Leigh,  thinking about you.

    jmurray - we have a great bunch of girls here!  Hope your first day goes well - hugs!

    Love to all,

    Lisa

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  • sammolisa
    sammolisa Member Posts: 180
    edited December 2010

    I take that back about the hair loss on my head.   It's starting......

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  • TonLee
    TonLee Member Posts: 2,626
    edited December 2010

    Went in today and got some Nexium for my tummy/intestinal wobbles, also took a Herceptin treatment.  Stopped by a PS and got some Botox shots..since I'll be losing my bangs.....

    Turns out most of my S/Es were from caffeine withdrawal.  I get very very ill when I quit caffeine cold turkey, and there were a few days when the thought of anything but water made me want to hurl.  I didn't think about that until last night....but it explains SO much of why I was good for 5 days and THEN felt sick.....I'm hoping next round will be less caffeine withdrawal.

    Bad news tho.  Got my labs done today.  My WBC is 1.  But I feel fine except for a sore throat.  I went to the mall this weekend, then spent 2 hours walking around the hospital today going to different appointments....It'll be a miracle if I don't come down with something....and on top of that, my PS "cleaned" my MX incision, so its back to bleeding and ickness.

    Oh well.

    Holy Cow!  Did you know the Chocolate Peppermint Shake from Chik Fil A has 930 calories and 31 grams of fat??  I just drank one, but wouldn't had I known that...shesh!  It was yummy though, I have to say.....:)

    Hope you all are feeling well today.

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  • jmurray5
    jmurray5 Member Posts: 4
    edited December 2010

    Hi all!  Got home from my first round of TC at 8:30 last night.  Slept well and feel good today but know from reading your posts that this may be the calm before the storm.  I had a great nurse that was very attentive and made the treatment go smoothly.  I took a claritin this morning (the 24hour one) and wanted to know how long you all took it post neulasta shot?  I am also taking a B12 supplement to try to reduce the risks of neuropothy with the taxotere.  Getting used to being a walking pharmacy. 

    julie

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  • sunflower71
    sunflower71 Member Posts: 130
    edited December 2010

    Day 13 for me and no sign of hair loss yet.  My head is very sensitive though and I have not had to shave my legs for a few days though.  I bought 2 wigs: 1 is long, blond and sexy for special nights and the other is a short, red bob!  I am trying to look on the bright side, at least it will take less time to get ready!  I will post a pic later of my red one.  I have not cut my hair.  At this point I am just going to wait till it starts to fall out.  When that comes, I will have my boyfriend shave it off.  I honestly do not think there is anything that can prepare you for that moment.  I recently moved to a new area and all of my close friends are in NJ.  They have offered to be there via skype for the shearing!  I tug at my hair several times a day, anyone else?

    I feel good.  The only side effects I have had recently are a raw, bumpy tongue and some minor acne (I was pissed about that, I mean really, bald and bad skin???).  My thumb nail aches, don't know what that is.  My next round got moved up by a day (22nd) since the center will be closed on the 24th (I would have gotten my neulasta then).  That makes my 2 worst days of the cycle Christmas Eve and day. I plan to be in a constant state of a narcotic haze this time around.  I plan to convince my onco that she will need to hand over the good stuff for pain this round.  I am not reliving that again.  All the ladies going thru it now, I am crossing my fingers that your meds work for you!

    Lisa- ((((((HUGS)))))))))). Damn. Already?  How fast is it coming out?   

    Julie- One down!! I hear you about the walking pharmacy.  I have six ziplocs labled and filled by symptom. Enjoy the calm, and hopefully your storm will be more like a tropical depression rather than a full-blown hurricane.  Remember the bad part will not last too long!

    TonLee- I had that awful stomach cramping.  It went on for days, maybe an hour or two for 3 days.  Nothing helped. Be careful with that WBC!  A 1?  Is that with the neulasta?

    Spartina-I was surprised when nausea crept up on me on day 9.  I now carry zofran and compazine with me everywhere.  I thought that it was done with after the first week! Glad to hear you were able to get somethings done, hopefully the nausea is on it's way out.  Feeling good for me is now euphoric.  I enjoyed cleaning yesterday because I could do it!

    Kim- I am so sorry that your pain is so bad.  It is a difficult time to get thru especially with a little one.  Now is the time to call in your support system and delegate as much as possible.  Pain pills and rest will get you to the other side. 

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  • TonLee
    TonLee Member Posts: 2,626
    edited December 2010

    Sunflower...my Dr is not giving me Neulasta unless I need it.....he'll do another blood test next week to determine if it will be required.....hmmmm.

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  • shelbytroy12
    shelbytroy12 Member Posts: 26
    edited December 2010

    Well, it is now time for me to join this club.  I am starting chemo on December 17th.   Just in time for the holidays.  I am very nervous and scared and hope I can lean on you all through this time.  I havent been told to do anything ahead of time.  Are there any suggestions anyone has of what to do to prepare?  Drink lots of water?  I've heard different things.  I hope I have the courage to show up...thanks for any help.

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  • dlcw
    dlcw Member Posts: 107
    edited December 2010

    Well finally got everything scheduled and I start Thursday!   Met with a new surgeon yesterday that I LOVED!  She's going to do the port tomorrow and then I'll be all set.  Still have an appointment for a second opinion at UCSF on Monday but I'm not sure why since I will have already started DD A/C by then - I think I just want to hear if they would do anything differently...and hopefully they won't otherwise then I'll be conflicted about my decision! 

    Went shopping for everything I could remember that was on the chemo lists I've seen posted on here - one question for all of you already started - is it Claritin D (the one they keep behind the counter) or just the regular?  Want to get some but wasn't sure which to choose.

    Also - did anyone's onc suggest Prilosec?  I was told to get some but I can't remember which drug it is supposed to help with....but apparently one of them can cause stomach pain due to irritation of the lining and the Prilosec can help.  I bought the box of 72 just in case......

    Kim - I hope your pain is better and your little boy is doing OK.  I have a 9 year old that is a cancer survivor himself and everyday when he gets home from school his first question is how am I feeling?  Did I start chemo yet? etc.  This is so hard on them. 

    Sunflower - I'll be thinking of you on Christmas - hope you are able to enjoy some of the day through the haze!

    Thinking of you all - checking this board often (maybe a bit obsessively) and hoping everyone is feeling as well as possible.

    Donna

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  • msjag
    msjag Member Posts: 416
    edited December 2010

    I am sharing some good news, all scan results in, bone scan, catscan of abdomen, chest x-ray...no sign of cancer.   noticed a few hairs coming loose on my head,,,gee it can't be from me tugging on it constantly!  

    Shelby, the best advice I received here was to chew ice during infustion, put nail strengthner clear polish on finger/toe nails, and drink gallons of water day before, day of and a couple of days after to flush those chemicals out.   Popsicles on hand, and if you can rest. Steriods did a number on me, so ask you onc ahead of time for something to sleep.  Good luck.

    Kim, sorry you're having such a hard time, I admire you so much, can't even imagine doing this with a young child to care for. You are quite an inspiration.  Hope you feel well soon.

    JoAnn

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  • TonLee
    TonLee Member Posts: 2,626
    edited December 2010

    WOO HOO Ms.Jag...that's GREAT news!!!  I am so happy for you.

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  • LEisenbarth
    LEisenbarth Member Posts: 30
    edited December 2010

    I love Reading the post but I cant seem to keep up with all you wonderful women.   Start TC today made it through without to many problems.  Had some back pain with the T.   and my mouth taste a little funny.  But that's about it.  Plan on working tomorrow.  Drinking lots of water and juice.  No nausea yet.  but I have my Popsicles and animal crackers on hand.    Had a melt down last night.  I hate BC. and I am praying for all you with your little kids at home, its so unfair that you are having to go through this.  I WANT A CURE NOW!!!!!!   My kids are 23 and 20 and I want to be there for them a long long time and that is what I am planning on.   This disease will not kick our butts we will beat it. 

     Hugs and Prayers ~Leslie

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  • hopefortomorrow
    hopefortomorrow Member Posts: 193
    edited December 2010

    Hi Dlcw- Yes, My Oncologist suggested Prilosec. A day or two ago I wrote that when I got to the pharmacy there were several names in that section in all varying prices...I started to wonder. I asked the pharmacist, and when I told her I was getting chemo, right away she said to take the Prilosec.

     The last few days for me, I have felt pretty much back to normal. So not looking forward to chemo on thursday and starting over again.

    I haven't had any hair fall out yet either. Today I shaved my legs and I could swear suddenly I have an overgrowth of hair on my toes!!!! LOL Go figure. I need to make my look good feel good appointment too. I just feel like I am constantly running around on errands. A little worn out from caring for my son too. He is doing much better btw.

    I hope everyone is doing well! Hugs to all!

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  • ShelMel
    ShelMel Member Posts: 207
    edited December 2010

    Hi my sweet December sisters -

    I started shedding today. It took me by surprise. My scalp has been tender and sore and even itchy at times. When I got out of the shower and was doing my hair I looked down and there was hair all over me and the vanity. I wanted to cry but gave myself a mental slap. I'll probably cry when we shave it. *sigh* 

    Kim - I feel so bad for you. There were 3 or 4 days where I thought I would not survive. I had no pain meds whatsoever. Please call your onc and find out if there's something else you can do. I hope you have some help with you. I'm saying and extra special prayer for you tonight. 

    JoAnn - Woohoo!! Congrats on the clear scans!! 

    Donna - I'll be praying for you Thursday. Hang in there sweetie. 

    shelbytroy1 -  

    Lisa - Good luck at your 2nd chemo. I hope you're SE's are minimal and you get through this round with flying colors! :) 

    hopefortomorrow - so glad your son is doing better! :) And you're feeling better, too. YAY! It's the small things....

    Leslie - I hope you have a great week with minimal to no SE's. It's ok to break down... we all do.

    shelbytroy1 - Definitely drink lots of water before, during and after your treatment. are you going to have the neulasta shot? If so, ask if you can take Claritin D before and after the shot for a few days. A lot of women are saying that it reduces the bone pain. There's some great threads on the boards about what to expect and how to prepare for chemo. Let me know if you need me to send you the direct links. You don't have to be courageous to have chemo sweetie - I certainly wasn't. You just have to show up. 

    Blessings everyone - - much love,

    Shelle

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  • klynnwayman
    klynnwayman Member Posts: 23
    edited December 2010

    Well, its late, so I need to make this quick...today was rough, as you all know.

     It ended up that the Lortab I have at home wouldn't even touch the pain today. They had to get me into the cancer center, and give me fluids for an hour and a half, plus morphine and steroids. It turns out that some people react really badly to the Neulasta shot (even worse than most), and if you don't drink double the water that you normally do, this sort of thing can happen. I amon heavy duty steroids for the next 5 days, as well as strict orders to drink tons and tons of water- all day long.

    So, my friends, please learn from my example. Drink, drink, drink water. Not that I wouldn't have gotten pain anyway, but without enough water to wash everything through, the side effects are much worse. 

    the good news is that I am actually feeling better this evening, and am snuggled up with my son watching cartoons. A nice end to a yucky day...lol.

    Love to you all,

    Kim

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  • klynnwayman
    klynnwayman Member Posts: 23
    edited December 2010

    Latest update- I woke up today feeling better than I have since the chemo/shot. There is lght at the end of the tunnel!!! Laughing And the extreme urge to drink as much water as I can get my hands on so that doesn't happen again next time!

    Today is head-shaving day. Fun, fun, fun....

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  • sammolisa
    sammolisa Member Posts: 180
    edited December 2010

    Back from round 2.  Not too bad yet.  A little headachey.   Sadder because this was my baby's due date.  Already have some tylenol in me and some compazine and gonna see if we can get some shopping done before I feel like I need to lay down. 

     Kim-  great to hear you are finallly feelin better!

    Hugs to all

    Lisa

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  • TonLee
    TonLee Member Posts: 2,626
    edited December 2010

    Yesterday.

    In the Chemo Chair next to mine.

    A child.

    My son's age.

    His mother's face, oh my god, his mother's face.  Creases deep enough for an an entire fingertip.

    Inside.

    I shattered. 

    I was strong and steady up until then.  But something died inside me yesterday, shriveled black and stinking in the presence of the child's pain.

    And his mother's.

    And for the first time I thanked God for my breast cancer.  Thanked God it is me and not one of my children.

    But a piece of who I am, of my fight, will forever lay on the asbestos tile of that chemo room, at the feet of a child.

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  • Beanius
    Beanius Member Posts: 1,697
    edited December 2010

    Hi All starting in Dec 2010...I'm just popping in to say I wish you all the best. I just finished chemo and it was doable. I was so scared in the beginning, and half-way was tough emotionally, but it does come to an end! I'm over half way through rads now (which is MUCH easier than chemo), then on to Tamoxifen in Jan. I'm so sorry you have to go through this, but if I could do it anyone can and you will too!

    TonLee: I have also thanked God that it was me and not one of my siblings (I never had kids). My nephew had cancer as a todler, it was awful, but he is well and turning 21 in 2011!

    Take care and be well!

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