Have you reconsider what to do the rest of your life?

I don't have a choice about working; I only have myself to support me, and I'll be working for some years to come.  But I certainly have thought about what I can do that will make a difference, somehow.  Most all of my jobs have been in the non-profit sector so this isn't a big leap for me but it's become more of a focus since my treatment.  I was helped by so many, in many ways and on many levels.  What can I do that will matter?  What can I do that will positively impact other lives? That's what I'm looking at.

I have a lot I'd love to do before I die that would benefit me in many ways -- but I've found that what matters to me most is when I can feel like what I do matters to someone else. I know I need to do things to keep myself grounded and at peace -- but that can be as simple as a walk along the river, or in the woods.   So as much as I still hope to do traveling (Italy!  Provence!), etc., I'm more motivated to do something that helps others than thinking about what I want to do for me.  I'm no saint; I just want to help.  In some ways I'd like to be able to impact the lives of those with cancer but I know that can be stressful as well.  I'm not trying to change the world, I just want to leave someone's life better because of something I was able to do or help them with.  It could be something very simple and ordinary. I just want to feel like I left at least one little corner of the world a better place.  I want peace of mind for others as much as I want it for myself.

So, to summarize, I'm not exactly reconsidering what I want to do -- but I am more focused.  I hope I find a way to live that dream.

PS, edited to add:  I absolutely believe that life is short, so grab it by the horns and do what makes you happy -- don't put off what brings you joy -- hug those you love, do what you've always dreamed of doing, and dance on the rooftops!

I re-assessed my priorities after BC but then I was lucky. A year after my dx I was offered early retirement from my job of 25+ years and I snatched their hand off.

One of my sons lives in spain with his family and so we bought an apartment over there. Thanks in part to the volcanic ash cloud we have spent 4 months this past year in spain and next year plan to spend the same time in spain plus a touring holiday through france.

I know I've been so lucky to have the opportunity but we decided that we should have 'our' time now and not put it off.  You have to make the most of it. We've spent some lovely times in spain with our grandchildren which we wouldn't have done otherwise.

Mal

great topic - big question!

I worked for an insurance company for many years and took a voluntary severance in the 90's. Since we can't survive on one salary, I had been looking for work and had held several short term positions before I was diagnosed with BC. It's a tough market and Maine is the worst state in the nation for business.

Since BC I have resumed my search, but my heart isn't hopeful. More opportunity for the young.  Plus, I feel more fragile and lack energy right now...isn't that what every employer is looking for in an employee?!  But I think being productive again would go a great way in helping that.

It would be great to be able to have a dream job after all this, but the harsh financial realities of breast cancer make getting a job even more of a priority.  Though I've kind of let things slip, I've always loved to sing and have done it all my life, but it is not something from which you can make a living.

God walked with me through bc. Now I just keep having those prayer conversations with Him and wait on His timing on bringing the opportunities.  

Wow, 

 I just discovered this thread and it is exactly where I am at.   Baxter,  I too feel fragile and lack energy now.   I took a new job shortly after my surgery but before the radiation and have not bounced back as I had hoped.   I don't know that I am really ready to retire yet,  I still feel I have a lot to contribute and hadn't planned on it for a few more years yet.  

The travelling is a passion of mine,  LuvRVing, we have thought about RVing as well.

Carcharm,  my husband is thinking of retiring as well,  and I feel similar to you, that I had the chance to be home for my kids and he hasn't had a break in many many years.  

Naturegirl,  good for you,  you are right,  we DO need to grab life by the horns, as none of us know how long we have.

Maltomin,  I know what you mean about the opportunity,  and I don't want to miss out either,

Ravdeb,  you are right  we do have to do what is best for us,  your Art sounds like a great idea.

Intwoplaces, thanks for starting the thread,  I feel the pull both ways right now and it helps hearing what others are doing,

hymil,  I too am really worried about the affects of stress,  as I too had only the same risk factors you mention so I know that is SO important

 b

Hello,

10 years ago I was originally diagnosed with bc.  I retired from my work at that time as I found going through treatment was all that I could manage.  I was retiring early as I was 52. I could do so thanks to my husband and his employment.   Soooo I had 9 1/2 good healthy years and I was retired too & could really enjoy them! I considered myself a very fortunate survivor!

Then 9 months ago...the cancer came back.  I had it on my scalp (yes, I was amazed too.  Just a little bump) several places in my bones and also in my liver.  Big shock.  I completed radiation on my neck vertebra where cancer was very bad, and then 7 treatments, every 3 weeks, of Taxotere.  As you know, there is no cure now, and I will probably be on some sort of treatment for whatever time I have left.  I'm hoping it will be quite awhile...but who knows? 

 I am feeling pretty well right now and decided I would get into a clinical trial at Johns Hopkins Hosp in Baltimore for the breast cancer vaccine. I first heard about the trial here on this board in the Stage 4 area. The trial is for Stage 4 patients who have not had chemo in the past 28 days before the vaccine.  I start on Jan. 24th.  I hope it might slow down the cancer for me, but I am also happy that I am contributing even a little bit to something so worthwhile.  Maybe someday the vaccine will actually be the CURE!!  Young women could avoid ever facing this beast.  What a wonderful day that will be!

So that is what I am planning to do to give back a little bit for all the brave ladies who went through clinical trials and brought about the drugs & other treatments that have helped me today. And for the countless young women and girls out there who will have to fight this disease if there is no cure. 

I wish all my sisters out there the very best. 

Judie  

Dear pitanga

I was browsing the message boards and my heart was touched by your story.  I am so sorry that you have experienced recurrance and mets.  I can tell from your post that you are a thoughtful person with a delightful sense of humor.  (early bird at getting cancer!  If ok with you, I may use that phrase as well) 

I am a physician and have my own practice.  During this extended period of treatment - right mastectomy, left breast reduction, dose dense A-C followed by taxol and now radiation, I have tried to work as much as possible.  I am married and fortunately my husband has great family health insurance, but we are still dependent on my income especially for our daughter who is in college.  I also have 7 employees who live paycheck to paycheck.  I have felt an intense feeling of obligation to meet payroll.  My cancer was huge and I realize I am at great risk of mets.  I think all the time about how to give meaning to the rest of my life.  If I had a crystal ball, that would help.

Please let me know how you are doing and what decisions you make

Elizabeth