Having Children After Breast Cancer

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Alaina
Alaina Member Posts: 461
edited June 2014 in Young With Breast Cancer

I am 39 years old and was diagnosed in March 2009 with IDC (Stage 3b). I am having my last chemo this Friday 7/24, and will have my Mx in August (left breast), radiation in the fall, and reconstruction starting next spring.

I have been advised that I need to go on Tamoxifen for 5 years to prevent recurrence of the breast cancer and keep me in a "chemical menopause" because my cancer was estrogen-receptor-positive. So it seems, according to my doctors, the rest of my life will be one long battle to suppress and/or block estrogen from attaching to cancer cells.

In the meantime, I would LIKE to have children. LOL!!! You need estrogen to do that (biologically anyway). Because of my relatively young age (for cancer) and the aggressiveness of the tumors (one was 8.5cm and the other was 6cm, and I never felt a thing!), there was no time to harvest my eggs prior to going into chemo.

I am posting here to see if there is anyone else out there who was in this situation and still managed to have children later. Did you just take a calculated risk with your life to go ahead and get pregnant (ie: stop taking the recurrence-prevention drugs like Tamoxifen)or were there other options for you to consider that made it possible (and not medically threatening) to have children after this diagnosis and treatment?

Thanks, Alaina

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  • cancerkicker
    cancerkicker Member Posts: 99
    edited July 2009

    Alaina,

    I am sorry you have joined the breast cancer club but am glad you are finishing up with chemo!  Getting that behind you is a big step!

    I have walked exactly in your shoes, so I share with you what i did and my thoughts on it.

    I was 28 when dx with breast cancer origianlly (stage 1).  I did chemo, rads and 5 years of Tamoxifen (I was ER+) and Zoladex injections (for chemical menopause).  Since I was younger, I never considered going off the Tamoxifen early but I knew that as soon as it was done, I was going to try and have a baby. 

    After I as done with Tamoxifen and Zoladex I still had not gotten my period after 8 months.  I was now 33 and was feeling the biological clock ticking.  My husband and I met with a fertility specialist and he gave me some medicine that "jump started" my period again.  I eventually got a period but did not ovulate so we tried Clomid and then moved to injections (Follistim) and finally got pregnant!!!  I delieverd my baby when I was 35 years old.

    My fertility doctor said that the amount of hormones I would be given during fertility treatments was less than the amount of hormones I would be exposed to during pregnancy and so I took that risk and was blessed with a beautiful baby boy.  When I was "released" from my oncologist after Tamoxifen, he said that I had completed my treatment and that there was no medical evidence to suggest that having a baby would make my cancer come back. 

    So here's the bad news..........9 months after my baby was born, my cancer did come back to my lungs (so now stage 4).  I had a 1% chance of it coming back (I had been cancer free almost 8 years).  Was it because of the fertility drugs?  Or being pregnant?  I will never know that answer.  But would I ever trade the experience.........NO WAY!  I love being a mom and the time I have had with my now almost 2 year old son is amazing. 

    The struggle I have now is knowing that I most likely will not see my son graduate high school.  My doctor has hopes that I would live 8- 10 years ( but that is well beyond the stats for stage 4 people).  In the last year year, my cancer did move to my sternum too. 

    I know I was very hell bent on having a child.  I knew that I was taking a risk that my cancer may come back.  I ended up with both.  It's bittersweet at times, but it was the right decision for me.

    We have looked into adoption - it can be difficult for people to adopt with cancer (epecially stage 4).  But it's not impossible.  However, the process is very long and quite expensive.

    I wish you the best of luck in your journey with this decision.  If you ever want to ask me anything, please do.  It's hard to find people in this boat! 

    Jessica

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  • mosthappycooking
    mosthappycooking Member Posts: 1
    edited July 2009

    Hi -- I am 41. I was diagnosed in 06. Chemo started in 06. My period stopped. Tamoxifen since 07. Need to be on Tamoxifen for 2 1/2 years. I am unmarried, but want to be. I have always wanted a family. Sometimes I get these pains in my gut that remind me of pms. I feel sad because I don't think that anyone will want to marry me because I'm infertile. I'm afraid of going off the Tamoxifen. I hope this doesn't bum you out, but I feel good to see your post. Now I don't feel so alone.

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  • nash
    nash Member Posts: 2,600
    edited July 2009

    I had my kids before my diagnosis, so conceiving right now isn't an issue. But I did want to mention that Tamoxifen can stimulate the ovaries, which is what has happened in my case. I was in chemopause for about 8 months, then started my period after about 6 months on Tamoxifen. After about a year of Tamoxifen, I decided to take a four week break from it to experiment with the side effects, and I missed my period that month. As soon as I went back on the Tamoxifen, my period started back up.

    So, it's not that Tamoxifen keeps one in pseudo-menopause--it just blocks the estrogen from the breast tissue. The ovaries still produce estrogen, and in my case, produce more estrogen apparently.

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  • lv2trvl214
    lv2trvl214 Member Posts: 9
    edited August 2009

    Alaina,

    So sorry to hear you have to go through what i know is a devastating situation. I was 39 when I was diagnosed in Aug  07 after only being married for 10 months. We were days away from starting in vitro when I found a lump. I believe the lump saved my life. Deep down I always feel that if I didn't catch it and got pregnant, the estrogen would have fueled its growth and I might not have been so lucky. I was stage I and had a lumpectomy and radiation. I was devastated when I learned I had to be on Tamoxifen for 5 years. We already knew  fertility was an issue, it would only be worse in my 40s. After much thinking, crying and research, I decided being a mom was more important to me than being pregnant.   We decided to pursue adoption. I know its not for everyone and when people said that to me, i discounted their advice since they were not in my situation. I seriously had to mourn the loss of not being able to have a baby on my own.  But, I am here to tell you that from the day we pursued adoption to the day she was born was only 7 months...less than a pregnancy!! She is the most beautiful girl in the world and I can't imagine her not being our daughter. I am a true believer in everything happens for a reason. As I stated above, I believe finding the lump saved me life and changed its path. We couldn't be happier!! Looking back on those sad days still brings tears to my eyes, but I wouldn't change a thing. Its just an option for you to consider!!  I can't imagine loving her anymore if I had delievered her myself.  Good luck in whatever you decide!! Just remember, there are other options!!

    Laura

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  • TSURR0831
    TSURR0831 Member Posts: 1
    edited September 2009

    I was 32 when I was diagnosed with Stage 1 invasive ductal carcinoma.  I chose to have a double mastectomy and went through chemotherapy.  February 2010 will be the last of me taking Tamoxifen as I have been on it for 5 years and have gotten my periods ( sometimes late) but throughout taking it.  I went to the oncologist yesterday so happy to discuss coming off the tamoxifen in February as I thought I was free for a while.  Well, he then surprises me with the idea of putting me on Lupron to shut down my ovaries until I meet the man of my dreams and want to get pregnant. If I had children, this would not be an issue.  I would take the Lupron without question....But I do not.  He also wants me to go for genetic testing but I don't really want to right now because I know if I am positive for the ovarian cancer gene ( FYI..my grandmother died of ovarian cancer) I am not going to remove my ovaries right now because I want children. I am so confused and upset about this.  Right now, I feel that I am going to take my chances and stop the tamoxifen in February and hope that I meet someone and can start a family. If in a few years this does not happen, then maybe I will do what the doctor says then.  HELP!!  I need as much advice as I can get.

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  • cloughy1977
    cloughy1977 Member Posts: 9
    edited July 2010

    To cancerkicker - your post made me cry! i would love to know hoe you are getting on. I am in exactly the same position as you were, i was diagnosed a 30 had chemo tamoxifen and zoladex for 2 yrs and finished taking them 6 mths ago. my periods have not come back and no-one is telling me anything. My breast care nurse told me about possible treatments to kick start my periods but after reading your post i am really scared now and just dont know which way to turn. x

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  • Alaina
    Alaina Member Posts: 461
    edited July 2010

    I had almost forgotten about this thread!  I wrote it exactly a year and 2 days ago!

    I am meeting with a gynecological oncologist on 8/6/10 to discuss what my options are, possibly get some testing to determine if I'm in real menopause or still just chemopause, etc.

    I have not fully given up the dream of having my own, but over the last year, I have determined that MY HEALTH is the paramount priority.

    So it's not as big a dilemma as I was feeling a year ago.

    Right now, my biggest challenges are getting through reconstruction (DIEP FLAP on 8/25, yahoo!) and contemplating dating again after I get my "new body."  

    *sigh*

    Thanks to everyone who shared their story.  I was not in an emotional place to respond last year.  What I've determined is that whatever happens will be GOD'S WILL and not my own.  I am simply resting and trusting in Him.

    It's the only way I get through each day without going completely bat-sh*t-crazy!

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  • Amanda_B
    Amanda_B Member Posts: 1
    edited December 2010

    Hi Alaina,

    I just want to send a good news story. I was dx with mucinous carcinoma in June 07 at the age of 31. Had a mastectomy, immediate recon, chemo (had Zoladex injections whilst on chemo) and then tamoxifen. My onco ( who is best in Australia) suggested that I live my life and allowed me to go off tamoxifen after a year. I fell pregnant immediately and gave birth to a healthy ten pound daughter in Dec 09.

    I breast fed her for 3 and a half months from my remaining breast and then resumed tamoxifen. I think I am blessed to have just one child so I will be continuing tamoxifen now for the next 5 years.

    I had a prophylactic mastectomy and immediate recon on my other breast 6 months ago.

    Whilst the last year has been wonderful with my daughter there have been challenges! Caring for a baby with lifting, bending, lack of sleep etc tends to cause aches and pains. As I am sure you will be aware you think the worst with every little niggle. So I have had a bit of a worrying year but all tests have been great.

    Definitely get your body well and the mind right before embarking on this journey. Your bub will need you in peak condition. Good luck!

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  • Poppalicious
    Poppalicious Member Posts: 24
    edited August 2013

    Wow, thanks for sharing your stories everyone!  I am glad to connect with others like me... 

    Cancerkicker - your post made me feel both sad and happy, but your child must fill you up with so much joy each day! Please keep us updated on how you get on.

    Amanda B - your story is so inspirational as I am in similar shoes.

    I was diagnosed just before my 33rd birthday (married, no kids, was trying), had a mastectomy with immediate LAT reconstruction, finished chemo while on zoladex around 3 months ago and my period just came back (my poor hubby had to deal with my worst PMT symptoms ever...while I just thought I had hit another emotional rut in dealing with my situation - geez I love him!), with no radiation or further drugs prescribed at this stage. 

    I know my body needs to recover and rest more before we try for kids (recommended to wait anywhere from 1 - 5 years) and I am not 100% sure if I am ovulating normally but I can't help thinking about this issue regularly.  It's hard not to when most of my friends have started their families and I seem to notice every baby or pregant woman around!  I know it's early days yet but if it's not meant to be then we will share our love through adoption instead. 

    Having to face cancer is already crazy enough but adding fertility issues on top brings it to a whole new level!  All the best to those trying or wanting to try out there!  

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