Anxious Daughter

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sfiala2008
sfiala2008 Member Posts: 2
edited June 2014 in Mental Health: Because Cancer Doesn't Just Affect Your Breasts

My diagnosis was 3 years ago.  Both kids (then 10 and 12) seemed to handle things okay.  Both kids when they hit 7th grade though started having issues.  My son (the older) became clinically depressed, he's now medicated and doing better.  My daughter started suffering separation anxiety in 7th grade (last year). She is also now medicated, seeing a therapist, and also has been to juvy cuz of absentism in school.  That is improving, but now she is 13 and I'm noticing she really hasn't matured much in the last few years.  Can't sleep without me in her room or she's in my bed with hubby and me.  Sucking her thumb again and just seems plain immature (compared to me at that age and most of her friends).  Any thoughts?   Maybe she has PTSD??

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  • BrokenHeart
    BrokenHeart Member Posts: 241
    edited October 2010

    Sheila,  my own daughter is extremely withdrawn over her Grandmother's bc, and is also medicated for it.   I worry about her a lot, but she's old enough to communicate her fears to me. 

    I think that if we as adults with Mothers going through this can get severe anxiety, depression and PTSD, younger children certainly could.  Your little girl seems to fear losing you - but I could be wrong - just a Mother's guess.  I would try and talk to her when she seems in the mood to see if there is anything else worrying her.  She's also at a hormonal age, so it's hard to guess....I can empathize, though.   I'm sorry you have the worry of your children on top of everything else.  Hugs, Zeana 

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  • sfiala2008
    sfiala2008 Member Posts: 2
    edited October 2010

    Thanks Zeana, I'm sorry about your Mom.  My Emma has gone though a bunch of therapy in the last year when her anxiety escalated, but it seemed we got to a place where she said she feels guilty but she doesn't worry about me because she thinks I look fine and healthy, but wants people to stop reminding her all the time about my cancer, so we moved on and her anxiety and school attendance has improved.  But it just hit me the other night as I looked at her sleeping with her thumb in her mouth....I really don't think she has matured at all (despite all the hormones, etc!) in the past 3 years, still sleeping with us, etc. and the PTSD hit me.  I don't think she realizes or can articulate what she's feeling.  I know myself sometimes I think I'm fine but I find as more time goes by the worse I seem to get psychologically you know.  More depressed, I sleep a lot more, and don't have any desire to go out and see my friends most of the time, and I just kind of feel numb a lot..  I have a feeling that I haven't realized either that I probably haven't been giving her the emotional support she's needed, I lose my patience with her a lot because she seems so immature over the smallest things.  Its always a struggle, but then I realize it's my lack of overall feelings that probably has her starving for my affection.  What a pain, I just want things to be back to the way they used to be, but I have a feeling things are gonna get worse before they get better, and to make matters worse my oncology visit today showed my markers going up again....bummer.

     Anyway, thanks for taking the time to respond.  I'm sure this is all pretty common with all of us, but I get frustrated that there seem to be so few people who know how to fix it, especially for the kids.  There are so many support groups for me, but none for my kids. 

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