Chemo June 2010

Latte I have been lurking on this post. I just started my first chemo TC x 4 on Ocotber 5th.

I  had a BMX On August 9th. I was planning on a lumpectomy but then had an MRI and it showed they needed to remove 7cm and even with a DD breast that would not leave much left. So my decision was sort of made for me on that. I decided to take the other breast on my own. I just did not want to deal with this ever again and i figured the symmetry would be better for me. I just did what I thought would be the least amount of times under the knife for me even though I still need reconstruction. Also my Braca was negative but my mom had a MX 30 years ago and just had the other one done about 6 months ago.

My question always is even though the survival for lumpectomy and MX are the same they don't tell you how many surgeries were involved for each woman. 

I think there are two things to think about. Most importantly which one makes you feel safer and then which one cosmetically are you ok with. 

I called The American Cancer Society and they have a program called reach for recovery where you can talk to women who had this done. That may help you as well it did for me.

All that being said if it wasn't for that darn MRI I would have had a lumpectomy  . . .  but in the back of my mind was thinking is this enough?

Happy Birthday Vicky!  it's also my baby girl's birthday-she's 19!

Latte-->I had a lumpectomy and didn't get clear margins, so I agonized over what to do and finally decided to have a uni mx.  Both my onc and bs advised me to wait until after chemo and rads to decided if I wanted any further surgery. I was so overwhelmed at the time with all the options, I'm glad I decided to wait.  I will have my other breast removed next summer, and I'm thinking about recon, but not sure yet. I wish I would have had a bmx, but at the time I wasn't ready to make that decision.  Just removing one was hard enough!  But, being larger, my prosthesis is huge, and heavy, and both sides never look the same.  Also, since they found dcis throughout the breast after they removed it, I'm wondering what's in my other breast that they aren't seeing.  Life will be esier without the worry and tests! I've already had 2 cancers-I sure don't want anymore!

My daughter always makes a "pros and cons" list whever she has a big decision to make.  It might help you to write some of your thoughts down too.  Good luck!

Bon--> glad to hear your mom is doing better.  I still have her on my prayer list!  And JFV, I have been praying for your MIL too!  Sounds like she is doing better too.

mitymuffin - congrats on your last chemo day!!!  Good for you.  My onco said it's a minimum of 3 weeks between chemo and rads.  It's usually around 3-4 weeks.  Good luck on rads! 

Tomorrow is Taxol #10, only 2 more to go after that!  Yipee!!

Yes, I get nose bleeds simultaneously on both sides almost every night!!!  Yikes!

Hi Tmarina, thanks for the info. Do you wish you had the uni MX instead of the initial lumpectomy, or do you think it was still a good choice to try the lumpectomy first? I am also large, and when I met with the PS, he said that if I use implants, I will have to use the largest size and also possiblly transfer some fat there later to fill it up properly since the largest implant is not big enough for me. I had thought i could go a lot smaller, but he said because the base of my breast is large, he needs to keep that size :-(  I'm not happy about that option.

Northern girl - the PS I went to also discussed DIEP with me - he recommended that I wait on the DIEP, because the surgery is too difficult for someone who has just done chemo and still needs to do rads. He also said I should try to lose 10kg before the surgery as it will be easier. He said this would be a reason to just do the lumpectomy now (not mx), and then 1-2 years along to do a BMX and DIEP together if I am healthy. 

kittycat - thanks for the help. I really don't want to deal with expanders and implants, which is why i am thinking about delaying the BMX and recon and doing DIEP instead.I think the main diff is that when you had your BMX with DCIS you possibly didn't have chemo and rads, am I right? This is the big issue with me and why I am thinking about delayed BMX/recon.

Latte--hmmm, good question.  It sort of depends on how worried you will be about bc returning. At first the cancer didn't scare me much.  I had just finished tx for a more serious cancer dx (stage 3b colon cancer), so this didn't really scare me.  But now, after going through tx, I know I NEVER want to go through any of this again!  And I also know now, that there was a lot more cancer in that breast then they were able to see on the tests.

Being large breasted I would highly recommend a bmx instead of uni mx, if you decide to do more than the lumpectomy.  You can use 2 prosthesis, that will match, and go without when you want.  I don't have the option of going without because it looks very strange having only one large, saggy breast!  I would love to take my bra off once in awhile (I only take it off at bedtime now).  Insurance will pay for recon later, if you choose to have it.  There is a thread of women who have chosen to "rock the flat look", and they have posted pics of themselves, and the different outfits they wear. It really doesn't look too bad.

Well, Sherry is returning from the dead - SLOWLY!  Had my first FEC tx a week ago today and started going downhill Friday.  Finally called onc's office yesterday and they had me come in this morning.  Blood counts were zero and I couldn't even walk into the office - had to use a wheelchair.  Had a slight temp (99.5) and could not sit or stand without getting dizzy.  Received IV fluids, antiobiotics and morphine (pain in all my joints very intense from Neulasta) and am back home for now.  I'm very nauseous this evening which I haven't been since my tx last week.  Lost 7 pounds in a week. Is there no end to this???

I haven't been on here in several days and there were so many posts to read.  But I'm curious - for those of us who have recently started or will start radiation soon, will we still post on here our progress and share tips?  Or do we have to go to another thread to do that?  I will be sad if I can't have the wisdom, insight and even humor from my dear friends I've become close to on here through the radiation process.

Sherry...I finished chemo on August 25th. Of course it didn't finish with me for a couple of weeks after that. And I started rads tx on September 21st...but I come back here because it's home. I did go to the September rads board and I post on that to get some insight and sympathy, but this board is the place I consider 'home'.  I'll keep coming back here as long as others who have climbed this mountain with me continue to come back, too. Honestly, I feel very bonded to you all on this board. I couldn't have made it this far without you, 

Sherry, I hope you start to improve soon and that the terrible pain and nausea are short-lived. I'm so sorry that this has been so rough on you.

I had a uni and am still going thru the expansion phase. I was a D before, but have lost some weight and I usually lose it in my boobie's too. I told my PS that I wanted the new one to be a C and would like to have the other reduced to match it. I am now thinking that I might just want to have it removed in order to spare myself going thru this all again, but I do like that fact that I at least have some feeling in that side of my chest. 

Thankfully, I won't really have to make any decisions until next summer. Then my expander will be replaced with the implant and I will be finished with rads and herceptin. This is a very difficult choice, but if I can avoid all of this then I might just opt for removal.

My Oncologist said that it would be 2 weeks b/w Taxol #12 and radiation, but I will be meeting with the R/O on Wednesday for her opinion.

I will also be staying with this board during my rads. 

Tmarina and everyone else. Thanks for the prayers and support ladies re my MIL.  She is coming home tomorrow.  Ready or not!  Should be interesting.

I have had 4 rads and although I post on a rads board ( I am such a chatterbox).  I plan on staying here.  I love you ladies!

So far no major side effects from rads or Tamoxifen for that mattter.  The only real rad symptom I have is that the radiated side is sore and stiff.  But since I lay with an arm over my head for 30 minutes and am not able to relax while I do it I am pretty sure I can blame muscle tension.

I have decided to return to  work on Tuesday.  It may knock me out physically.  But, it is a mental hurdle I need to get over.  The sooner the better.  I have been out of work since my diagnosis in March.  For awhile I actually accomplished stuff while I was home.  Now I just sit around and feel sorry for myself.  So, it's time.

Wasn't the mine rescue in Chile wonderful!  I found it very up lifting.

Dmom- I have red rimmed  eyes and have had an allergic face rash for over a month.  My husband who never suffers from allergies is having a very bad time these last few days.  All that rain we had made the fall weeds bloom and brought out the mold.

latte-  You are smart and thorough in your research.  As it is not a cut and dry decision, I say try to tune in to your deepest intuition.  You will make the right decision.

Bon-  So sorry about the scheduling drones who screwed up your rads.  You will get back up in the saddle heading toward the finish line soon enough.  Happy to hear mama is feeling better!

Okay, I am anxious as h#%&*ll!  I have been calling every week since my Sept 15 rads simulation to see when my start date is. Having heard nothing, I called again today.  They said I am scheduled to start THIS Monday!  I said it would have been nice if someone let me know.  They yada yada yada about someone being out sick, jury duty etc...  DO I CARE?!!!  I asked if I would meet with my RO (no, he's on vacation).  I asked if I would have any orientation etc (yes before you get zapped).  I told her I would just go back to the internet to try to answer the MANY questions that I have.  I am convinced that we are pretty much directing THEM to do the right thing most of the time.  Yes, I am fed up and ready to be done with all these "stupie"(my son's term) uncaring medical folks.  Boy would I like to let them trade places for a couple of weeks and see how they like it!  Thanks for letting me rant, I feel better now.  You are all the BEST, don't know what I would do without you!

Sherry-  Oh my!  You will have paid ALL your dues plus extra credit when you survive this chemo torture.  My prayer is that it will be clear sailing for you once you finish!

Like many of you, I consider this thread HOME and I'm not leaving.  Like Bon, I am learning things on the October rads thread, but you ladies are my family and this is home.

JFV-  Thanks for the feedback about allergies this Autumn.  That could be why my eyes are so irritated.  Hoping things go well with you MIL.

kitty- I'm so sorry about your chemo friend.  Know that she is at peace now.  I think she will be happy to see you again one day and catch up.....hopefully a very, very long time from now.

Okay, the weird Duluth connection has surfaced again.  My cousin who I adore, but rarely speak to, contacted me to say my Aunt, who I am also out of touch with, is near death (Alzheimers and Parkinsons).  Her kids want to cremate her and bury the ashes near her parents (my grandparents) in the Duluth cemetery.  When they called to inquire, it seems my grandparents bought SIX plots!  None of us knew.  We can only theorize they were buying them for their two daughters and their spouses??  My cousin had to get our permission as my mom was the eldest child and heir of these plots.  How weird is that???

Yes, I was jubilant to see those miners rescued and emerge into fresh air and daylight after 70 days.  Such good news! One of my friends works for Campus Crusade for Christ and just told me they (along with some others) provided those t-shirts with the writing on the backs that the miners were wearing.  She said it was in Spanish and quotes Psalm 95:4 "He holds in his hands the depths of the earth and the mightiest mountains."

I had my second day of IV fluids. This time they put Zofran and Decadron in my bag along with the antiobiotic. I think the Decadron did the trick because I feel really good this evening.  I slept for about 2 hours when we got home today and have eaten more and drank more today than I have all week.  They left my port accessed in case I needed to come back tomorrow morning. I'm supposed to call in the morning and report how I'm doing and then they will decided if I need to come in for more.  I'm thinking if I continue to feel as good as I do right now, I'll only go in and have my tubing removed.  They have kept my port accessed in order to eliminate the need to be stuck each day.  The nurses at the tx center, and the staff, are all so sweet and caring. They've been very sensitive to me this week.  THANK YOU ALL for caring and responding.  This place and you people are very special to my heart.

I have a question for you, my special friends.  After this week, I have really been questioning my chemo.  I'm pretty determined to ask my onc at my next visit to just stop the chemo and go on to radiation.  Even though I have mixed feelings about whether or not I have been able to do all I need to in order to rid my body of this @#$% cancer (I love the computer symbols - only time I ever cuss!!) I really believe that the chemo will kill me long before the cancer will. Here's a recap of my chemo history. 

A/C x 4 every two weeks = had 1 A/C tx - a week later had to go in two consecutive days for IV therapy then two days after that was in the hospital for 2 days

T/C x 12 weekly - first 4 tx was so sick and nauseated I wanted to die - could not eat or drink for 3 or 4 days after each tx; finally got a drug regimen that cut the nausea down by 75-80%.  Blood counts began to tank and onc said I would only have to do 9 tx of the 12.  He would give me credit for my one A/C tx that would equal 3 Taxol txs.  

FEC x 3 every three weeks - was supposed to start this regimen 2 weeks after my last Taxol and ended up going 3 weeks longer than that because blood counts were not high enough - finally had one tx 8 days ago and you all know what has already happened. 

What do you guys think?  If I ask the onc to discontinue chemo, will I just be digging an early grave?