Calling all TNs

Congrats Swanny!

Congrats Swanny!!!  I can't wait for my last chemo!  4 more to go!!! 

Wow! all of you ladies look marvelous! Great updates. I'll try and do one too. Well, it's 4:10 and guess who is wide eyed and bushy tailed. Well, actually the bush hasn't started growing back yet, still doing the sideways. However, I do have a full beard, mustache and nose hairs though. I can't wait for the hair on my head and eyebrows and eyelashes. Got my 7th Taxol today. I've started another painting tonight it has kept me busy and prevented me from looking at the clock to much.Kittycat- we are just about in sinc. I hope it's not to late to try the ice baths. I plan on starting them next week. I've noticed my nails have weird ridges and are kind of brownish near the cuticle. They feel kind of liked they have been smashed too! My wbc counts were low again today I will try the Riki, chanting and chimes again next week because last week they were normal and I had that done two days before chemo. I skipped it this week to see if there was a difference. Not to smart.  I'm still doing acupuncture twice a week and that has helped with my SE's a lot. MBJ- You are right about who loves you and who doesn't etc. I am or feel like such a stronger person now and like others seem to have less tolerance for peoples s**t. At least I feel that way today but we all know what happens on Friday night and Saturday, this Laura chick has her meltdown. At least I have finally realized the pattern and will try not to freak out when my tears and pity me strikes. LOL. It will be over by Sunday. It's been great getting back to work doing my landscape designs again. I'll be starting my crew on a new landscape installation for an Ash and memorial garden at a church on Monday and I hope to finally start carving again. The stone I ordered has been delayed but it should be ready for pick up on Monday. Please neuropathy don't hit me now! Swanny- cheers to finally being done with your chemo! 

Wow! Here I go rambling again. I can't even keep my dog awake tonight. I'll go back to my painting. Good Morning to all and a fabulous day.

Thank you everyone for the congrats on finishing chemo and my new picture.  I'll post more as my hair grows more.  Can't believe it is pretty much all gray.  Can't for it to be long enought to dye.  Have a good day.

I'M SO SCARED! I spoke with my personal doc today and explained my lymph node pain has increased and my lymph has continued to increase in size over the last three weeks. It had gone down in size considerably I could hardly feel it 3 weeks ago. He told me he thinks there is a chance that my tumor is aggressivly fighting the taxol. I'm so scared. My Onc is off on fridays but he said he will try and reach her on her cell. This is the same whako that couldn't even remember where my tumor was last time I saw her. he said he would schedule an ultrasound if she blew this off. he said the good news would be that if the Taxol wasn't working I would be elegible for the clinical trial he had originally tried to get me in on when he first diagnosed me. It's scary because I have been complaining about my lymphs bolthering me for the last 3 weeks and the nurses just blew me off saying general pain was to be expected. My lymph is now as swollen if not bigger  than it was when I was dignosed in May. Told my wanna be boyfriend who suddenly showed up out of the blue yesterday who I haven't seen in a month as I was telling him what my doc said he asked me if I wanted to go see lady Gaga or the rolllingstones.WTF he wasn't even listening to me. When I told him how could he be so cold hearted and who gave a s**t about some upcoming concert he turned around and said I was overreacting and got pissed at me. I guess my BC is a downer for him and he prefers to ignore it. When I first felt my lump and was so scared he thought I was overreacting too. I guess when it actually turned out to be TNBC you'd think he would understand my original concern. I wish you guys were here and  I could feel your hugs in person which is all I really need. Ha! I guess that is why I have been feeling so damn good on this Taxol. Man, I just feel like jumping in my truck and driving to the other side of the earth right now.

{{{laurajane}}} Can you switch MDs?  Also, being on chemo, infection can cause LN swelling.  Your counts are low so risk for infection is high... Hang in there.

Brand new to this group, but, have been reading the threads for months. First time to ever post anything on any discussion group!

About me: Triple negative also. Diagnosed 1/27/10 @ age 63. I work full time in a top level, administrative job @ a university.  Always had regular mammograms, active, fit and no family history whatsoever of breast cancer. Had dense breasts and the last several years was called back to have 2nd and 3rd mammogram redos, but, nothing except extreme denseness ever showed up.

Just prior to scheduled 1/10 mammogram, I felt an unusual thickening in right breast. It was sore, but ibuprofen and heating pad helped. Went for regular annual check up and mentioned the soreness to my gyn. He examined it closely and immediately sent me for a diagnostic mammogram and ultrasound. Results came back quickly: large mass in right breast and lymph node involvement under right arm. Immediate referral to surgeon; biopsy confirmed initial reports. Huge mass (10 - 12 cm) but, oddly and fortunately, tumor cells were and continued to remain low grade one.

Surgeon referred me to excellent cancer center @ St. Vincent's hospital in Birmingham, AL. Met with medical oncologist and team and since the tumor was so large, but, low grade - they recommended neoadjuvant chemo to shrink the tumor. 4 rounds of dose dense A/C followed by 12 weekly doses of taxol from February - July. Tumor showed very slight shrinkage. Had bilateral, modified radical mastectomy of right breast with axillary node dissection and simple mastectomy and SNB of left on August 11, 2010.

Although the chemo reduced the evidence of cancer in right breast and in lymph nodes, the mass remained large - 10+ cm with 1 macromastesis and 3 micromasteses in lymph nodes. Clear margins were obtained and no evidence of disease at all in left breast or (left) lymph nodes.

Due to excessive fluid retention after post-mastectomy drains were removed on 8/24/10, have been unable to begin radiation. Developed ongoing seroma on right side in chest/underarm area. Have had fluid aspirated twice a week for the past 5 weeks. Fluid levels are almost at an acceptable level for radiation to begin. Am scheduled for simulation in approximately one week.

Sorry for the length of this, but, just wanted to also indicate how very different a triple negative diagnosis can be from individual to individual. Although very fit and active, I am certainly not as young as most of you! I have no family history and honestly - have never even had a cold or the flu!

Thanks for the opportunity to post. I have learned a lot from reading these posts and hope to be able to communicate with others - especially us more mature/older ones -  who, like myself - do not fit the "norm" (if there is one) of a triple negative diagnosis.

mimix3:  Thank you for posting and sharing your story.  It is amazing to me how much triple negative disease can vary from person to person.  I have heard that it can be grade 1 or grade 2, and you are the first I have heard of with grade 1. It seems many people were healthy and fit, like you, with no family history, and then it just shows up.  I hope researchers solve this puzzle of TNBC and come up with a cure, or at least a treatment, very soon.  Hope you are able to start radiation soon.  Good luck to you and I hope you will post again and let us know how you are doing.

MBJ  your hair is growing fast. Cool!!!!!

Thanks to all of you for letting me vent so often on this site. Thanks for your hugs and everything else. 

Got the call today from Onc. she is as concerned as my personal friend/doc. I get to see her Monday AM. She already made a call to my surgeon in case they decide to go ahead and do the surgery sooner than planned. i guess the main concern is that the increased size of my tumor and especially the lymph growing so much quicker in the last 3 weeks. She explained that she would not be as concerned if it was general lymph pain throughout all but just the one that was diagnosed. It was originally larger than my original tumor and still is. Man, it was so much nicer when I could feel the decrease in size a few weeks ago. It would have been so nice if they had continued to shrink.

MIMIX3- Glad  you posted. We are all different ages, grades, etc.. I'm glad you shared your story with us. We are all different and so alike in so many ways. As they say we share a common thread. Ha! Please join us. I am anxious to hear how things go for you. Sending positive thoughts your way 

MBJ- You may be right. BF has been trying to distract me all day with talk of anything other than the news I received today. Trying to do all of these sweet things that would have made me happy or cheered me up before it's just that sometimes I really need to talk about the issue at hand. Thats why I love all of you guys. I can just put my fears out there and not have them smothered without having the opportunity to express them. I love sharing my good days with you all to. I hope Monday will turn out to be an unexpected good day with great news maybe hear that the Taxol is working and I have no reason to be fearful. Have a great week-end. Love your hair!

Welcome, Mimi - sorry you had to become a part of us, but it's so comforting to know we all have each other, because I have definitely seen in my 1 1/2 with this disease, that no matter how much your family and close friends love you, they just don't get it at all  - they just don't understand our fear, aches, pains, etc., and doom and gloom that comes with being triple negative and having no targeted drugs for this insidious diagnose.  If my sister tells me one more time that I need to be more positive and to be more thankful for my early diagnose, I will scream and go beserk (more beserk than I am at present!).  She honestly thinks I am out of the woods, and that I just need to go on thinking I am "cured."  Ha! If only it was that easy.  I too had yearly mammos - never once had a call back - and just found this dang think in my 2009 yearly mammo - wham - just like that!  No cancer on either side of my family ever.  Go figure!

And, Kelley - I agree completely with you - I too think the chemo (as disgusting as it was, and I had every SE known to man), was easy compared to trying to get back to living your life everyday without wondering when the other shoe might drop, or questioning every ache and pain you get.  I hate what this disease has done to each and every one of us.  Sometimes I wish I could see around the next corner, but then again, maybe I don't really want to see what's lurking there!  If it's any consolation, I'm a full year out of chemo and my bones still hurt from time to tme- nothing yet that I feel I need a scan for (or am I just going down the river called de Nile) as they go away within hours or overnight.  Of course, being a "young" 63 year old just might have something to do with it too!

Wishing everyone of us nothing but the best - always,

Linda

Kelly:  The aching bones come once the chemo is done, that's for sure!  I started out grade 1 jumped to grade three but my final pathology report was grade 2.  I have no solid idea what determines which grade except for the info given on this site.  For me, I had two grade 1 tumors which the quantity moved me to grade 2 and they suspected attachment to the chest wall which bumped me to grade 3 but my my BS cleared the margines into my chest wall during my mastectomy, which put me back to grade 2.  For now my prognosis is good because I have no lymph node involvement, but I have heard of women who have many years out who had many lymph nodes involved, so I think it is a very individual thing.

((((Laurajane)))):  It sounds like you have some great dr's and no matter what is going on now, they can address it.  I say go with the distractions to get you through the weekend because right now to obsess about it would just not be good for you.  Come and vent here if you would like as often as you need because we willo be here to listen always, (even my husband doesn't want to hear about "it" anymore)--Everyone just wants us to be well and I don't think they mean any harm, they are just as scared as you are.   Big, big hugs!

Mitymuffin - I pray that all is good with your daughter.  Think positive.  Like they have already said, 23 if very young for this disease so I really hope everything is fine.

Laurajane - Take care and HUGS your way. 

Thanks for all the kind posts from everyone for finishing chemo and my new avatare.

Funny note regarding the Target stories:  I have wated The Bucket List twice and the line that always makes me laugh is when one of the main character says "beware of the fart".  I know just what he means and it cracks me up everytime.  (I don't think young peole get that joke).

Take care all - have a good weekend.

Thanks you all for your kindness. My daughter's ultrasound is next Friday. I looked up statistics and at her age (23) its a 1 in 110, 000 chance of having breast cancer. That should be reassuring, but a Mama worries (particularly a triple negative Mama). I'm still reeling with the shock of my own diagnosis.)

As to best thing today, laurajane, I just got back from riding my horse through the woods, staying out of the saddle and balanced over my legs to strengthen them.  My legs feel like jelly, but they will get stronger. I hope you have had fun and done something using your tremendous creativity.