You know you're a cancer patient when....

1…3536384041…162

Comments

  • DesignerMom
    DesignerMom Member Posts: 1,464
    edited September 2010

    Lizards, winkies and failing biology class! LMAO

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • LadyinBama
    LadyinBama Member Posts: 1,132
    edited September 2010

     I have learned so much at BCO, but never expected to learn that lizards masturbate.

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • Lowrider54
    Lowrider54 Member Posts: 2,721
    edited September 2010

    Paraketts do too - found that out when mine starting getting very friendly with a hanging toy - poor thing humped on the thing for hours a day for a month!  With all the squalking and flying feathers, I was sure the thing would be bald...I was ready to call him 'chemo bird'. 

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • Wonderland
    Wonderland Member Posts: 3,288
    edited September 2010

    ........when you go to bed and position your daughter's beanie baby animals on your chest so the sheet doesn't touch your mastectomy site. Now you're thankful you didn't use the lizard or parraket ones! Smile

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • dutchgirl6
    dutchgirl6 Member Posts: 673
    edited September 2010

    Oh no, not the beanie babies too!!

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • iodine
    iodine Member Posts: 4,289
    edited September 2010

    -------when you see a regular, non cancer, doc and s/he says "well, I would normally just ask you to wait 6 mos. and see , but with your history".  So you wind up getting more and more testing.  Then the testing shows some strange incidental abnormality and s/he says: "well, I would normally---------

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • micheleboots
    micheleboots Member Posts: 1,993
    edited September 2010

    I too thought that is YKYACPW a screen name...

    YKYACPW it takes you about one minute to type YKYACPW...it makes me use my chemo brain to much to type that.

    YKYACPW you try to get into another mans car when your husband picks you up from work...I was trying to open his door and noticing how dirty my van was.  Then the man asked if I would like his keys...look over and my DH is laughing his guts out at me.  We laughed all the way home today.

    YKYACPW when you can't wait to tell you BCO friends what a chemotard you are.

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • kittycat
    kittycat Member Posts: 2,144
    edited September 2010

    When you leave the house as a blonde and return as a brunette (and you have the blonde wig in the backseat). 

    When the girl at the MAC store asks you if she can re-draw your eyebrows for you (obviously I didn't do the greatest job on them today). 

    Chemotards Unite!!  :)

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • Stanzie
    Stanzie Member Posts: 1,971
    edited September 2010

    MAC store? Is it late or do I just not know what this store is?

    Micheleboots - when I was a pre-teen I remember one New Year's Eve when my uncle who was a terrible prankster told me he bet I couldn't remember where he parked the car. I took him up on it and found the car and he gracefully accepted my findings and put us all in the car. Then we waited. Next we heard the car next to us starting up and there he was in HIS car pulling away killing himself laughing and there we sat. How one earth I managed to find a car that wasn't locked.... Anyway, I still giggle thinking of that so I guess it happens more than I thought! Thanks for the reminder!

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • micheleboots
    micheleboots Member Posts: 1,993
    edited September 2010

    One time many years ago BC my girlfriend and I were shopping. When we came out we BOTH got into a minivan that we thought was hers.  She started the van  and then we both realized that this was not her van.  Who knew that keys can work in more than one van...

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • barbe1958
    barbe1958 Member Posts: 19,757
    edited September 2010

    YKYACPW someone mentioned a joint and I thought hip.

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • DesignerMom
    DesignerMom Member Posts: 1,464
    edited September 2010

    lowrider-  The humping, feather-flying, squeeking, cage rattling masturbating Parakeet has to be in the  TV sitcom!  OMG LMAO!

    kitty-  You must keep your neighbors on their toes with all your different wigs!  Have you named them?

    For whoever asked about MAC stores.  MAC is a fantastic cosmetics line available in most department stores.  They also have their own stores.  I love their spf 15 foundation.  You probably were struggling to figure out MAC like I was trying to figure out YKYACPW!  Now what could MAC stand for?"Missing Another Clue"?
    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited September 2010

    OMG-I am snorting with laughter. I have never heard anything like the lizard story or parakeet doings' and i had a ton of lizards as a kid. i have tears rolling down my cheeks!! This story is priceless. What great parents you guys are!!! XXOO, SV ps oh man I wonder how many lizards I flushed down the toilet who were just-well.....?

    ........when you are having a beautiful day outdoors and look up at the waving tree limbs and fall flat on your back bec your balance is gone. But you do get a comfortable 360-degree view of all from the ground!

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • DesignerMom
    DesignerMom Member Posts: 1,464
    edited September 2010
    StillVerticle-  Do we need to change your name to "Sometimes Horizontal"?  Enjoy the view!
    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • silvergrl
    silvergrl Member Posts: 13
    edited September 2010

    When you automatically pull out your health card at the cash register at Banana Republic, because you use it more than your VISA!

    When someone looks at you with that withering sympathy, and you can honestly say "Hey, I'm great!" because you know at least 5 people who are suffering more than you.

    When "negative" and "being eligible for a trial" become positive thoughts!

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • barbe1958
    barbe1958 Member Posts: 19,757
    edited September 2010
    MAC cosmetics = Makeup Art Cosmetics and is a CANADIAN company. We done good! Laughing
    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • dlb823
    dlb823 Member Posts: 9,430
    edited September 2010

    YKYACP when, "I'm doing great," is always followed up in your mind (although rarely spoken) by thoughts like, "So far" and "If it doesn't come back," as well as "You have no idea what I've been through to be standing here looking healthy and whole."

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • dutchgirl6
    dutchgirl6 Member Posts: 673
    edited September 2010
    Isn't that the truth, dlb823!
    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • KittyDog
    KittyDog Member Posts: 1,079
    edited September 2010

    DesignerMom wrote: StillVerticle- Do we need to change your name to "Sometimes Horizontal"? Enjoy the view!

    okay that one gave me another good laugh. Thanks I really needed that. The lizard one was also great.

    YKYACPW your neighbor doesn't recognize you or your new car stopped in front of your nephews house and asks your nephew do I need to call 911.

    YKYACPW only you and nobody else could have an allergic reation to your new FOOB.  Why me. itch itch itch

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • dawney
    dawney Member Posts: 211
    edited September 2010

    You know you're a cancer patient when you run back in the house to grab a Gatorade and leave the refrigerator door open ALL day (happened just today)

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • Ca1Ripken
    Ca1Ripken Member Posts: 1,254
    edited September 2010

    YKYACP when you proudly announce to your husband that you just got your prescription EOB and it was $3,500 for October.  And, he says, um, do you mean August.... and you curse yourself for using wrong words yet again!!! 

    Still LMAO Sometimes Horizontal!! 

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • PauldingMom
    PauldingMom Member Posts: 927
    edited September 2010

    When your young adult children constantly ask you if you need a ride to your doctor appointments.

    It sure makes waiting in the waiting room more pleasant.  

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • karen1956
    karen1956 Member Posts: 6,503
    edited September 2010

    when u keep coming to bco to read this thread!!! and miss it when you've been mia for a while!!

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • Alpal
    Alpal Member Posts: 1,785
    edited September 2010

    YKYACP when the funniest commercial you've ever seen is the mom ordering fast food at the drive thru and her son says "Mom, this is the bank". I was laughing so hard I didn't even see what product they were advertising. Then - after I finished laughing I worried that the poor woman had chemo brain.

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • barbe1958
    barbe1958 Member Posts: 19,757
    edited September 2010

    YKYACPW you teach your customer how to say "Chemotarded" when she uses the phrase chemo fog (probably not expecting me to know what it meant!) ehhehehehe

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • DesignerMom
    DesignerMom Member Posts: 1,464
    edited September 2010

    YKYACPW-  You are talking to the demo lady at Whole Foods about her all-natural Henna hair color and ask if she knows if it can be used during chemo.  When another customer says "no one should do chemo or radiation, NONE of the doctors ever do chemo or radiation", you just have to respond and say that it really is a VERY personal decision and NO ONE should be criticizing these very hard decisions that cancer patients are making.....least of all those who have never walked in those mocassins &$#+&*$!  

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • micheleboots
    micheleboots Member Posts: 1,993
    edited September 2010

    Designermom, you are a better person than me.  I don't hold back any more...

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • mnmom
    mnmom Member Posts: 2,068
    edited November 2010

    DesignerMom,

    You are so right about personal choices.

    "Sometimes Horizontal" too funny!!!!!!!

    YKYACPW ...you had something to type but forgot 'cause you are chemoly distracted by all the great posts!!!!!!!!

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited September 2010

    omg Barb, lol, i just woke up and am trying to read thru 'fuzzy eyes' and thought you wrote "chemo frog." instead of chemo fog! And D-the gatorade story-ROTF-been there done that!

    .....I am hooting over the horizental remarks bec good friend who is on the same path as me just took a terrible fall and she says she has signed up for 'defensive walking classes." I need defensive standing and leaning classes!!

    .....when you catch your first red drum of the year out of the surf and everyone on the beach ignores the lunatic baldheaded lady running around with a really big fish in her arms while whooping it up. xxoo, SV

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • chabba
    chabba Member Posts: 5,065
    edited September 2010

    Well done DesignerMom! 

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter

Categories